At her company office, Magenta sits at her desk not doing an ounce of work. Her mind's in a different world. Coming back from a weekend where you went out of town, it's always hard to get back to work. It doesn't help there's so much going on.
Gen taps her pen staring at the tv hanging on her wall that shouldn't even be on. The news flashes a title that says, Pregnant mother killed in drive-by shooting. With a sigh she quickly grabs the remote turning it off. She only watches the news to be updated with the world, but it's so morbid.
She gets back to work going through her emails when one in particular sticks out. It's a message to confirm she has an appointment tomorrow with all the information she needs. Clicking her tongue, she contemplates the what if's and maybe so's.
Magenta's grandmother always told her that when you bring a child into the world, you have to be okay with raising them alone. Married, in love, or not. You can choose the best person possible to create life with, but life's unpredictable. If you're not ready or okay with being a single parent, you don't need to have that child.
Some men don't leave by choice. And some women end up dying during childbirth. People get killed. People go to prison; guilty or innocent. The list goes on. Are you strong enough to do it by yourself? Would you want to?
The truth is Magenta doesn't feel ready. She's still trying to heal certain traumas. She doesn't want to put her child through anything damaging just because she isn't healed. That's on top of not feeling their world is safe enough to bring a new life into it.
She thinks about being a sexual assault survivor. She thinks about how she has self-harmed due to depression. She thinks about how she had suicidal thoughts. She thinks about her c-PTSD. And she thinks about the wreckage that has become their life since Caprice, Fade, Kross, and Destin came into it... All over the span of a year and a half.
But she also wonders if this is the afraid, little girl who felt rejected and abandoned responding... The girl who always feared people around her going to prison or dying. Can the need for safety and the fear of abandonment be so powerful that they control her relationships? She asks herself that often when looking at her reactions. She has to start confronting that part of herself. She's always had an addiction to security.
Gen knows this isn't a good foundation to a marriage... If they get there. This is a make or break decision that could crumble what they're building.
Gee has always made her safety his top priority. He's the only man whose made her feel safe and secure. Should she have faith in him and hope for the best or choose the safest option? What does she really want?
A knock at her office door grabs her attention causing Gen to look up. The fashion production manager enters handing over a folder of papers. "Are these the clothing line designs? They're goood," she gets excited skimming through them.
"Aren't they? There's a page with a few manufacturers we can use."
"We have to pick the perfect one. We don't want defective pieces then we waste time and money. This is the last piece of the company that needs to be launched and I'll be content.. For now."
Magenta always wanted to have a fashion aspect of Project222. It makes sense because they work with models, designers, and stylists. She wants to have clothing showroom with their own creations. So when people come to do photoshoots they can go purchase them. The designs will be simple, but if done right they can become a staple in the industry. She wants her company to be a hub for all types of creatives whether music, movies, or fashion.
This reminds her how a baby can slow down her growing business. They've only been operating a few months. Being pregnant and trying to run a company isn't ideal, especially in the first year.
There's another knock at the door but this time it's Gee standing in the entryway. "What're you doing here? Can you excuse us?" she says to her employee who takes her exit.
Genesis closes the door behind her and sits at the chair in front of Gen's desk. "I came to take you to lunch," he smiles mischievously.
She looks at the time responding, "Uhh-"
"Don't say you're busy and can't. We need to sit down and talk. Let's go," he stands back up. He looks around the room finding her purse handing it to her.
Magenta leaves with him without a fuss, but every time she asks where they're going he'd say it's a surprise. Before she knew it she fell asleep in the passenger seat. There was no way to fight her fatigue when they were driving for more than 30 minutes.
When she does wake up, Gen looks around confused. Gee drove them forty-five minutes west of downtown Houston to a nice, quiet town. "Where are we? You told me you were taking me to lunch. I've been gone nearly an hour. My break would technically be over."
"That's one of the benefits of owning the company. You can do stuff like that," he replies nonchalantly.
Genesis turns the Dodge truck into an open gate with a big entrance sign over it. As they travel down the dirt road it's clearly someone's farm. "What is this place?"
"It's a date." He can tell by her facial expression that the explanation isn't enough. "It's a sunflower farm." She lights up in a smile making him happy to see it. He hasn't gotten one in about a week.
"I was starting to think you forgot it's my favorite flower."
"How could I forget? They just haven't been in season. They're blooming and I thought it'd be nice." As the old saying goes, April showers bring May flowers, and that's exactly what's happening in Texas. Sunflower season has officially arrived in the Lone Star State. It's perfect.
"Cute. What? You're taking me here to change my mind?"
"I'm taking you because we haven't been on a date in awhile." She nods and he gets out of the car. Walking around, Gee helps her down from the passenger side.
"I need a damn step stool. I don't think I'll be riding in this car often."
"It's nice though," he smiles still not over his birthday gift.
"I should've took it back."
"We're not Indian givers 'round here," he kisses her cheek.
"That term is offensive now," Gen chuckles as he closes the door behind her.
"Okay, then no taksies backsies."
"Whatever," they both laugh walking towards the entrance being greeted by the owners.
The first thing they do is go see the farm animals in the barnyard. Magenta sits with a baby rabbit in her lap feeding it. She looks over at Gee who talks to the farmer who owns this place. "Yeah, we just bought land outside of Houston and building a house on it," he looks so happy saying it.
"How many acres?" The man asks in response.
She doesn't even realize she got lost in their conversation for a minute. Once Gee mentioned they wanted to have animals on their land, the man's mentioning how he sells them and they're exchanging information.
It dawns on Gen that the dream of the ranch with alpacas may not come true if she goes through with this.
Rubbing her thumb into the soft, white fur a bittersweet smile crosses her lips. Gee makes his way over to her after he finishes his conversation. "I think I want a cow," he sits next to her.
"When I first met you you didn't even want to go near a squirrel," Gen recalls.
"It was albino with creepy, red eyes. That's different. Dude who owns this place was an entomologist. He bought some land and did agriculture research for a few years then became a farmer. We could get those agriculture exemptions if we get certain animals," he nudges her softly making her chuckle.
"You thought this through, huh?" He nods timidly. "As long as you don't want an ostrich."
"Ostrich?"
"Yeah. When I was a kid we went on a field trip to a farm like this one. They had an ostrich pin. They let us in to feed them. Those mutha fuckas were aggressive and chasing us. It was scary as hell. I think our teachers did it on purpose."
Gee laughs saying, "No ostriches then." You can tell it's awkward with all the future talk. There's an air of uncertainty around them that wasn't there before.
Despite that they continue the date. Next, they're taken to the sunflower trail. This place has a sunflower farm that's four acres. They strolled through the neat rows of flowers, picking some to take home, and taking pictures.
Leading the way, Magenta follows behind Gee wondering, "Where are we going?" She gets her answer when they stumble upon a cute picnic setup surrounded by the sunflower field. Her eyebrows bounce up knowing he's trying to sweeten her up to get his way.
As they both sit at the low table she notices there's small canvases, paint, brushes, and table easels like a sip and paint. On top of that they bring out drinks and food from her favorite soul food restaurant in Houston.
"There you go. Holler if you need anything else," Henry, the owner says putting down the last thing before leaving them alone.
"Ohhh, look who went all out," Gen peers across the table at Gee who shrugs. Giving a short smile she asks, "What're we painting?"
Going step-by-step following a tutorial, the pair is quiet and concentrated trying to make theirs perfect. Magenta furrows her eyebrows then leans over the table trying to look at his. "Quit cheating," he motions for her to sit back.
"We're painting the same thing. How can I cheat? Mine doesn't look right," she chuckles dipping her brush in more paint.
"You're tryna steal my sauce 'cause you know mine is about to come out better than yours. I'm one of those niggas who's good at everything I do," Gee brags. It grows quiet again, but this time he can't stand it. "You remember when Instagram live just came out..." Gee says randomly.
Gen rolls her neck knowing where this story is going. "Yeah, I guess."
"You thought I was fuckin' that chick De'Asia. The AKA who would throw all those kickbacks and parties. I was at her apartment and she showed me on her live. You were stalkin' and before I knew it you were all in the comments going off. Cussed her ass clean out," he laughs.
"She shouldn't have been posting my man!" Gen screws up her face. That was junior year of college. The peak of their messy ass situationship.
"Your man? Meanwhile, you were in a whole toxic ass relationship with Caleb. What kind of backwards ass shit was that?"
"She blocked me. All I did was go to Facebook and message her cussing her out again. In my head you were still my man. Shouldn't have been fuckin' me like that," Gen pops her tongue.
They both laugh remembering how toxic it was. "You were crazy!"
"I wasn't crazy alone. How many times did you beat my boyfriend's ass? Oh, okay!" They chuckle.
Both giving long sighs he says, "We came a long way."
"Yup, then it feels like we haven't," she brings him back to reality. They can laugh and smile all they want, but it doesn't erase the problems at hand.
"I was thinking... Maybe it'd make you feel safer and more comfortable if I got my own apartment until the house is done. Give you some space. And if someone comes as a threat looking for me, we don't run the risk of you being harmed as well."
Magenta raises an eyebrow in confusion. "I'm not going to feel safer alone..."
"And you're not going to feel safer with me there. Not when I can become a target."
"I don't think that's the solution. Who wants to be pregnant and alone?"
"We were supposed to move out of that townhouse after they killed my dog. It's time. You can stay with one of your brothers. Choice is always in Austin working, so you can stay at his house in Katy. Or you can stay with my mother," he tries to find possible answers. He pauses realizing what she said. "I thought-"
"The appointment is to confirm I'm actually pregnant than we'll go from there. I'm still unsure."
"Me too," Gee mumbles catching her off guard. He's been walking around like a sad ass puppy since Miami. She figured he'd never forgive her if she went through with it.
"Really?"
"Don't get me wrong, this is something I wanted. We got on stable ground for a good while then it got shaken back up... Partly because of my actions. I caused a 5.0 magnitude Earthquake. I have to live with the wreckage left behind."
"I'm very conflicted, you know? We're not teenagers. We have the financial means to take care of a child. We have money and established careers, but it's not enough. Things are so out of control. At the same time, is there ever a perfect time? It'll always be something. I don't know," she shrugs.
"We didn't dot all our I's and cross all out T's, I guess. I noticed when I'd talk about children, you'd brush it off. Sometimes even change the subject. Do you really want kids?"
She breathes out. "I didn't. This world is crazy. I wanted kids with you. I entertained the idea once it was with you... But in a few more years when things have calmed down."
"I want you to make the decision that makes sense to you. I can't make you have this baby if you don't want to. I don't want you to resent me or the child. I think we both know all too well what it's like having parents who were thrust into a position they weren't ready for. Whether that's emotionally or financially. Kids don't deserve that."
Silence falls over them. For anyone else, being surrounded by the vivid yellow blooms would brighten their mood. On the other hand, theirs is dampened by their clashing thoughts. Magenta plays out every scenario that can come from not going through with this pregnancy or bringing a child into their current world.
Both don't seem good. The only good outcome is they live happily ever after with none of these scenarios coming to fruition.
Gen breaks the silence by asking, "Would you think I was selfish if I get rid of the baby?"
"Nah. It's more selfish not to think about every aspect before deciding to procreate. It's more selfish to have a baby just because you want one."
"Would you be done if I go through with it?" Is her next line of questioning. She looks down circling her brush in paint. Her heart beats slowly waiting on an answer.
"I can't answer that and I shouldn't." He says this knowing whatever answer can sway her decision. He doesn't want her to choose based off him. "It's not even that simple." Gee says that, but she can see in his eyes his foot is already out of the door if she gets an abortion.
She flips to the other spectrum asking, "If I choose to go forward with the pregnancy, how do I know you won't change your mind?"
"Change my mind about having kids?"
She nods. "You may think it's not possible, but feelings change. Men change once babies come. People make pledges, and have good intentions that never manifest. Reality smacks them in the face then they realize they're not ready. They're not as active. Then the woman ends up being a single parent."
He rubs his face as if she's killing him with each question. "I just want my family. I wanna come home to the same thing everyday. To something I've never had before. On any given day I could come home and my Daddy was gone while my Mom's crying on the floor. I like what we're creating. I'm telling you, I'm ready."
Magenta can see the seriousness and honesty in his face. She knows she looks like a scared sheep compared to him. "Mm," she takes it in weighing the options in her head.
The Next Day...
Throwing on something comfortable, Magenta checks the time. Her and Genesis need to leave the house at a reasonable time to make sure they're not late for this appointment. In the meantime, she's on a video visitation with her father, De'Mario.
Magenta never thought her father would be the one she'd confide in for advice. Let alone that he'd be the first one in her family she'd tell about the pregnancy. Since they began speaking regularly he's been a source of reason. He can always be impartial because he's not on the outside world aka present. He's not bias and he doesn't pick sides.
"I understand," De'Mario says after she explains everything as best as she can. She had to leave out some things because the call's recorded.
"You do?"
"Those are your daddy issues arising, baby girl. You're putting up your guard again. Man, I wish I didn't give you these problems," he lets out a sigh of regret. "Me and your mother failed all four of our children terribly. And any failure of your mother's was a result of my inadequacies . She had to do certain things because she was trying to navigate being a single mother. Really it all falls on me. As a man I failed. That's a hard weight to carry, and I'm sure Gee feels that right now. That he disappointed you so much that you have to even think about not having your child..."
"That's what it is. I'm more disappointed than anything. It takes me back to why I didn't want to build a relationship with you. Or why I didn't want to date him in college. I used to be mad at you like, how could you do what you did to end up in prison? I used to think you didn't care about us because if you did then why would you risk it all?"
"And then overtime you shifted your thinking once you gained more understanding. Maybe do the same right now.. I think you need to give Gee more credit than you do. Don't see him through the lenses of the men in your life that came before him."
"True."
"I had a messed up view when I was younger. I viewed your mother as just a vessel to have my children. I didn't truly look at her as my equal. Because of that I didn't cherish the gift of my family, so I was willing to risk it all for money, power, and respect. Also, ego and pride. I should've felt man enough leading a household, but the streets are what made me think I was a man back then. Is your worry that Genesis will end up behind bars like me?"
"Yes," she huffs almost feeling sick just thinking about it. Ever since they found Destin's body, she's been anticipating that knock on the door with the authorities behind it.
"I was 19 when we had Cortlen. Your mother still in high school. We weren't ready by miles. Then we turned right around and had Choice two years later. By the time we had Felicity, we convinced ourselves we wanted to have kids young to get it over with. Stupid and selfish really."
"Did you regret it?"
"We brought you guys into dysfunction," De'Mario didn't need to say anything after that.
"I'm trying to consider Gee too. I also think about what Gee's been through in the past..."
"What's that?"
"When we were in college he got this girl pregnant -or he thought he did. When he told me I was crying and sliding down the wall. All dramatic. I was like, nooo, I'm supposed to be having his first baby," Gen chuckles being transparent. "She led him to believe it was his baby."
"I'm taking it the baby wasn't his?"
"Nope. She moved to his home state with him while he was on probation. They got in a relationship. He wanted a family so bad he was willing to ignore the fact the baby wasn't his. I know that fucks with a guy's head. Their trust."
"And you feel like you'll be taking something away from him again if you get rid of it?"
"Yeah, his moment. There was a disconnect the 'first time'. He wasn't at every appointment. Not even the birth. He didn't sign the birth certificate. This could've been a happy time for him. There's no doubt in his mind the baby is his. It's not rooted in deception. It's not about money. It's pure love.. Just wrong time."
"They say love wins," De'Mario says as she begins thinking.
Ending the call, Gen finishes getting ready. They leave to a nearby clinic and as they sit in the waiting room, her father's words replay in her head. Her nerves stew inside, but with Gee he shows them outwardly. Her eyes that're transfixed to the clock on the wall shift to him sitting beside her. He pulls at the rubber band on his wrist popping himself - Nearly ten years later and he's still doing it.
Their arms share the same armrest, so she opens her hand. Instinctively, he clasps hands with her right as a woman comes through a door and calls her name. With hands joined they make their way to the back.
Walking into the ultrasound room, she's filled with mixed emotions. Mostly anxiety. The sonographer walks them through everything that's going to happen.
The room is deathly silent for a few seconds as the woman does her job. "You're definitely pregnant," the woman points at the screen. Gen was trying to avoid looking at it, but when she does she's met with what looks like a glowing blob. She stares at the black-and-white ultrasound screen feeling like this is the first time the pregnancy seems real. It's scary.
"Looks like you're 7 weeks," the ultrasound technician concludes after measuring. "I estimate you'll be due in January. Top of the New Year," she smiles, but Gen's too busy calculating in her head.
It dawns on Magenta like it was yesterday the night the baby may have been conceived...
Laying on the couch, Gen enjoys the pitter-patter sound hitting her windows. The thunder roaring during the storm puts her at ease like nothing else. She's home alone with all the lights off and only candles lit.
When you lived with your grandmother growing up, some of their ideas rub off on you. It's a habit for her to turn everything off and wait for the storm to pass. 'Let the lord do his work', Evelyn would always say. It's been raining most of the day, so she's been in and out of cat naps.
She doesn't fully awake until she hears the door to the garage open. She sits up checking the time on her phone. Her ears perk up with each footstep that comes down the hallway. She doesn't release her breath until she hears, "Why are you sitting in the dark?"
Genesis emerges from around the corner putting down his carryon and backpack. "I thought I was picking you up from the airport," Gen rubs her eyes.
"It's raining so hard and I didn't want you to drive in that," he stretches and groans. As soon as he entered the room, Magenta could feel the heaviness within him. Getting up she greets him with a tight, long embrace feeling like she's hugging a two ton elephant. "I missed you."
Gee took another trip to Kentucky to handle business regarding his father's death. After getting the footage that showed Kross being the last one at his dad's home, he wanted answers from the LMPD.
The investigation conducted by the police department wasn't thorough. It was straight negligence. And every day he finds out so many more things were ignored. They put little effort into it for three possible reasons...
1. They didn't think Genaro was worth it.
2. They were paid off not to.
3. Because Genaro had been in trouble with the law in the past as an ex-drug dealer. He didn't have good relations with police in the community.
Despite reburying Genaro and now knowing Kross killed him, he still has a lot of emotions stirring in him. It's like mourning him all over again. Grieving a natural death versus a murder is completely different.
"You hungry?" She asks as he sits on the couch.
"I'm good." He reaches to grab the Apple TV remote but Gen stops him. "Here you go. So what're we supposed to do? Just stare at each other?" he shakes his head because his grandmother was the same way.
"You wanna talk?" He sighs deeply deciding 'might as well.' "What'd you find out?"
"They gave a bunch of excuses with no explanation. I showed them the video of Kross leaving. And the fact he was the last person seen at the residence before my mother tried to come see him. They said they went through the security camera footage, but never saw that."
"Lying."
"Exactly. Apparently, when they initially got to the scene everything was rummaged through like someone was looking for something.."
"He was looking for the tapes," she deduces.
"Yup, but when the cleanup team came they put everything back. That's why when me, Sev, and my Mama went to pack up the house it didn't set off any bells. I asked why they closed his case so fast and they just looked at me stupid. Maybe if I sue their ass they'll get it. They're not used to people having the resources to fight and go against them."
"I'm sure Destin's father or Kross paid them off."
"Yeah," he rubs his temple. "They said there's nothing they can do since Kross is dead. I already knew that, but this shit is pissing me off... I don't know. I'm relieved Kross is dead. I can breathe now." Gee thinks about the fact that if Kross was alive one more second he could've been dead next.
"And it's perfectly fine if you feel that way. He did a lot to you," she massages her hand into his shoulder.
"I know," he responds lowly turning towards her. "I love you. I'm gonna go take a shower," he kisses her before getting up and disappearing up the stairs.
Magenta spends the next hour down in her craft room working by candlelight. It's not until there's a startling boom of thunder that shakes the entire townhome that she decides to stop.
"See, oh no." Quickly grabbing her phone, she trots up the two flights of stairs for the master bedroom. She's sure Gee's out of the shower by now and she'd rather be cuddling with him anyway. "Gee," she calls out turning the doorknob.
Gen's surprised when she enters and he's sitting on the edge of the bed like he's stuck. He's staring at portrait of his father that Gen got him for his birthday the year before. She can't tell what he's thinking. His facial expression is both hard and unreadable.
His eyes don't even flicker until Gen blocks his line of vision. She stands in front of him placing herself between his legs asking, "You okay?" She rubs his earlobe then her hand caresses down the side of his face to neck knowing that's his spot. His tense posture softens at the gesture.
"I don't know," he gives his usual response when he doesn't want to talk about his feelings or assumes no one will care.
"You do know... You can always talk to me," she reminds him.
It takes him a few moments to find the words. His shoulders are slumped and his head is down. "I'm angry. I'm hurt. I want revenge. I want people to suffer. I want to hurt people. I get so mad," he takes a deep breath. Why did this have to happen to our family? I think about the reason and it's not good enough. It'll never be good enough," Gee's voice shakes.
It's rare she sees him like this. He usually bottles everything up. She'd describe Gee as a rock, but she's the lightening that strikes it. Every now and then those walls drop with her encouragement of expressing his emotional freedom. When the world falls short and becomes too overwhelming, they retreat to each other.
She listens to him attentively allowing him the space to vent. She learned to be his safe place, his safe haven. She's glad that her heart was softened in her healing to do so. The scent of a raspberry turnover candle that's on the nightstand wafts into the air. Its sweet smell contrasts with the harsh reality in the air.
Looking up at her, he says, "I don't ever want you to doubt for one second that I love you. That I won't protect you with everything I have.."
She furrows her eyebrows. "I never have and will. I feel safe with you. I always have," she responds, although, she wonders why he's saying that.
This was the night Gee decided he was going to do whatever to make sure Destin's father and Destin got what they deserved. That his father got justice.
"Everything's gonna be okay. You're not alone," Gen assures him.
He snakes his arm around her waist holding her tight as if it'll be his last time. The room is silent. But soon the heavy downpour outside would be competing with the stream of Gee's tears. The weeping grew to sobbing as she consoles him.
It's all hitting Genesis for the first time. Realizing that his childhood friend murdered his own father in cold blood...
His hands are balled as his grips the cotton fabric of her Rick Owens plunge-neck T-shirt. He's crying so hard her abdomen is soaking wet. Gen sucks in the deeply feeling wetness come over her own eyes. She hates to see him this way. His pain is hers.
When he looks up at her, Gee reminds her of a small hopeless child. It feels like nothing she says will be the right thing. She wipes the tears with her fingers causing him to close his eyes briefly. For a second he looks content.
Gee releases the hold he has on her waist. He lets his fingertips roam causing goosebumps to form on her skin. The pads of his fingers trace the scars on her thighs from cutting.
They healed over the year, but the self-inflicted wounds mean a lot. Magenta will always have her life and the circumstances of it written on her body. It's a map of self-loathing and shame of not feeling good enough. Despair, anxiety, depression, and anger took hold of her. Her intimate relationships were a disaster of chaos and fear. She couldn't feel safe, secure, and worthy of love or happiness.. Yet here she is both of those; loved and happy.
She looks at his hand focusing on the shiny skin that marks where a hot bullet grazed him years ago. It was a brush with death, only for the next to be a full-blown collision. The gunshot wounds on his stomach always made her curious. She was always too scared to ask if he ever sought revenge on those who did it. When she finally did he vaguely said, 'The business got handled.'
Both of their skin speaks about a battle that other people may think they've won. They don't know there's no battle to be won, it's only an attempt to survive.
It's like Gee once said, "Sometimes I feel like the person creating the monstrosities in my life. Other times I feel like I'm only the monster everyone and everything around me created me to be."
They deserve to feel alive, not only survive.
Grabbing his chin lifting it up in her direction the space between them is closed. Their lips linger over one another and when they meet their previous thoughts disappear. His mind is at ease now.
Pulling her down to straddle his lap, their lips only lose connection when she says, "I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you.. To be your wife." The statement is comforting.
From there no time is wasted, but in the most worthy way. Every second's filled with desired actions. Like a key in a pendulum clock turning the gears to wind it, Gen's internal mechanism is seconds away from striking 12 – Another orgasm.
"S-shit," she moans feeling like she's on the brink of a great breakthrough. He holds her body close to his own as she rides him.
She's about to speed up chasing that feeling until he grabs her waist gaining control of her pace. "Slow," he repeats in a whisper. He wears a look that reads 'I need you' sending chills up her spine.
This isn't a night for fast sex ensuring they both take their time to meet the other person's needs... Passionate yet gentle, slow, deep kisses, rain, and a dimly lit room. The flame on the candles around the room flicker making their shadows linger and creep around the edge of the light.
She grinds into him with deliberate and unwavering determination. With her face next to Gee's, his low moans fill her ear. They say any man's moan is top tier, but his always shook her core like the initial shockwave of thunder. His calming and soothing tone only makes her wetter.
His hands tangle into the ends of her hair before gripping at the nape pulling her in more. It forces her to look at him as he gives complete admiration. "You're so perfect," he says making her want to crumble in his hold.
Before she can, Gee stands up from the edge of the bed without disengaging. Securing her arms wrapped around his neck, she locks them so she doesn't fall. His hands cradle her bottom as she hangs suspended from him placing her feet on the bed for support. "Oh, fuck," she bounces up and down with the help of his arms.
In a swift motion he's placing his hands under the backs of her thighs allowing her to wrap her legs around his waist. He continuously thrusts into her, and she captures his lips in a deep kiss — essential ingredients for the ultimate coital connection.
"I'm about to cum on this dick," she whimpers only for it to be followed by a deep booming moan that reverberates around the room transcending the r&b music playing. The rapid-fire bounce hit her spot making her feel like she's being dropped from a cliff.
"Put me down," she taps his back because she can feel her arms losing grip from her body becoming more limp by the second. He chuckles turning to put her flat on the bed. Laying on her back she looks at the clock realizing they've been at this awhile, but he looks to be not nearly done. "That was a lot."
"That's what you wanted. I know," his voice holds assertiveness as he pushes her legs back. Him toying with her wet folds sends a shiver through her body. Kneeling down his pillow soft lips meet the ones between her legs.
Magenta sighs sinking into the king size mattress. She'll always love that his bad days always translate into the most beautiful release of pent up energy. 'Yes, take it out all on me,' she thinks to herself. He's always been good with his mouth and hands.
A sign of his stress level throughout the weeks is Gee's growing beard that tickles her skin. Matched with the vibration of his moans as he's immersed in her wetness it made her let out a sing-song tone.
Crossing both legs over his back as his tongue flicks against her clit, she cradles his head. Her hips roll into his working tongue and it's not long before she's calling for a higher power. Her soul might as well be traveling up the stairway to heaven.
Lapping up the remnants of her release, he follows it with a tender kiss almost as if saying hello and goodbye all at the same time. It causes her legs to tremble in an attempt to clamp shut only for him to hold her thighs open.
"See, that's the shit that makes me think you like me," Gen breathes out looking up at him now that he stands over her.
"If you don't know I like you by now we have problems." His eyes are fixed on the window observing the rain has significantly slowed down outside. He flashes a small smile her way and n the dark room all you can see is a gleam of diamonds.
"You like me?" She lets out a giggle laced moan. She watches his every move following his instructions to lay back with her legs all the way back. Nothing like being folded like a magazine.
Getting himself into position, Gee sank down into her answering the playful question by saying with conviction, "I love you. You know that."
"Oh, fuck." A glint could be seen in her eyes before they briefly crossed. With each stroke it took her to a place where she could envision a couple littles ones running around the ranch with a dog, horses, and even ducks.
She watches him grind in and out. His lower abdomen rubs against her clit giving the extra stimulation she needs. Her own nails dig into the flesh of her thighs as she holds herself in place. "You feel so fuckin' good, baby. Damn," she said in a quiet melodious voice.
Wrapping his hand tightly around her throat, he pushes deeper into her making Gen gasp for air. "Fuck!" she squeaks out through her moaning fit. Her breath gets caught in her throat and the pressure heightens. His reminder for her to do a basic body function such as 'breathe' is helpful in the moment.
"This my pussy, baby?"
Her shallow breathing turns to panting. "Oh, God!"
"Answer me."
Using one hand to hold onto the arm around her throat she looks up at him. "It's all yours. You have me. You'll always have me," she holds eye contact.
Slowing his strokes, Gee falls in love with the feeling of her walls closing in around him. "That shit is mine. You gon' give it all to me?"
His girth curves at her spot making every ounce of constraint leave her body. It feels like everything is being unlocked and gears are turning. With legs trembling, she cries out in a slow, sing-song tone that crescendos into a dramatic plea. Gen's glad no one lives with them.
At the same time, every time he collides into her there's an audible slosh sounding exactly like the cars that drive by on the streets going through puddles. The light shower turned into a deluge drenching the sheets underneath her.
"Good girl," he groans in her ear. "Breathe," he reminds her again as he goes deeper. It prompts them to synchronize their breathing; inhale and exhale together. The coordinated rhythm opens an unspoken dialogue of intimacy.
Everything she tries to say sounds like it's not English. Meanwhile, everything he says is loud and clear to the point it's driving her to insanity. "That shit is so good," he huffs not letting up for a second. Amidst that shit talking he asks, "You gonna have my baby?"
She's so lost in the moment she honestly didn't hear him. He could've been asking for her bank account information and she would've gave it up. The good sense God gave her had left the room.
"Genesis..." Moaning his real name always did something for him. "You make me feel so good."
Wrapping her legs around him, she holds his head so he can't do anything but look in her eyes. Looking in his eyes was always like an abyss that she could get lost in. He was never just looking at her, he looks into her.
Engaging in an impassioned lip-lock, he can feel every bit of restraint leaving his body. He tries to break the kiss, but he lips catch his tongue sucking it before letting out a moan. He hits her spot one last time filling her up like a gas tank.
Clinging onto him for dear life, they laid there for what felt like forever stuck to one another. "You okay?" she asks him.
"I'm good...now," he says quietly slipping out of her before kissing her.
Usually, they'd participate in what her therapist calls 'sexual aftercare'. It's when you support each other and check-in after you've had sex. Intimacy can ramp you up and leave you with all sorts of emotions. You may feel energized, drained, exposed or vulnerable. It can be as simple as cuddling, deep talks, rub each other, watch a show, eat, shower, listen to music.
He'd always ask if she's okay afterward and tell her how much he loves her. It made her feel safe, but tonight he's the one who needs it.
She could still feel his heartbeat as his chest rose up and down on her stomach..
Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.
The sound grows louder, almost echoing.. She was so into the recollection, Gen didn't hear the sonographer say she's going to see if they can listen to the heartbeat. If she did she probably would've told her not to.
A whooshing noise that sounds like wind blowing through trees takes over the room briefly. It's replaced by what she'd describe as a cord whisking through the air then hitting the ground while jumping rope. Maybe like the sound of a trotting horse.
It's fast... Like hers. She knows that to be true because for a second Gen can hear her own heartbeat in the background. The ultrasound tech makes sure to tell her that so she doesn't think she's carrying multiples.
It's fast... Like Gee's on that night. In that moment it's like she can hear both going at the same pace. It's overwhelming in her head.
Gen was too scared to make eye contact with Gee. She's been avoiding it since they came in here. So, when she looks over she regrets it. His eyes are stuck on the monitor and she can tell he's experiencing everything from fear, to hope, to joy in a matter of seconds. They're welled up with tears and she's shocked. Gee's not an emotional person.
She's only seen him cry three times – After his friend, Quez, was killed, and twice regarding his father.
Gee's eyes are filled up, but he won't let himself cry. He must've felt Magenta's eyes on him because he gathers himself only to look terribly defeated.
The sonographer plays it for a few more seconds saying, "It's normal. Nice and strong. Alright, any questions for me?"
Gen clears her throat. "If I wanted to terminate, how much time do I have?"
"Right now, you're less than 10 weeks so you can have a medication abortion. If you want to have one after that, you'll need a surgical abortion. You have up until 14 weeks. You still have time to decide. If you've already made up your mind, I can provide you with information."
"Right," she says faintly.
Magenta's glad the appointment is short, and they're out the door after approximately 20 minutes. They have a lot to think about.
The rest of yesterday was a blur. Neither of them really said much after the appointment. Gee's been putting his focus on other things because if he doesn't he has to think about the fact his world is showing signs of collapsing around him. He's being crushed and suffocated under the weight.
He still has a small sliver of hope, especially after they heard the heartbeat. As soon as he heard it his heart started beating faster just to hear a life. The realization that's a little him inside there was an indescribable feeling.
Gee's trying not to rush an answer out of her, but he deserves not to be in limbo as much as her. He already has enough on his mental, and he'd rather not have this added.
After running errands with Magenta, they go to their plot of property. Today they officially broke ground to begin construction on their custom home. As they pull up to check on what progress they've made since this morning, they can see the yellow cranes digging up dirt.
They spend some time talking to the team on-site before going into the hole they excavated for where the house will eventually be. Standing in the foundation of their home, Magenta says eagerly, "I'm excited! I can't wait for them to do the foundation and framing. I think this is right underneath my closet."
"You would know where your closet is." He turns in a circle trying to imagine the house when it's only dirt and grass. "I think that's our bedroom over there. I don't know. I'm confused. I just know it's the front of the house."
"Imagine that corner on the second level. It's one of the extra bedrooms. You think the nursery would look good over here?"
Gee's face distorts making sure he heard her right. "Huh? What're you saying?"
"I think... I know we should have this baby. That's if you want to."
"Are you crazy?! Hell yeah!"
He hugs her so tight, simultaneously lifting her up off the ground, that it makes her croak out, "I can't breathe."
As he kisses all over her face she basks in it. "What changed your mind?"
"This baby was made out of love. And I think it's a sign. Of what? I don't know yet."
"I knew I left sum'n in there," he looks at her stomach getting a playful eye roll in return.
"You trapped me, that's what you did."
"How was I supposed to know your birth control came out? Isn't that your job to check? If anything, you trapped me!"
"Yeah," she says lowly. "One thing my mama taught me is I absolutely have control over my womb. If you don't wanna baby with someone there's always ways to prevent it. No excuses. As worried as I am... I was never scared to have you as a baby daddy," she chuckles.
"That's a compliment. Nicest thing you've said to me all week," Gee smiles kissing her.
Earlier he couldn't imagine the house with it's current state, but it's like it became a fully painted picture. They're building their dream house. He can visualize them arguing over what looks better where. He can definitely see them quarreling over her wanting something he thinks they don't need - Only for him to buy it for her because she's spoiled. It'll be their space together. They'll leave the house knowing they'll come home to someone when they return.
"I can't believe this," Gen sighs with hands on her hips looking around. "Two kids who made it out of projects and hoods building our house from the ground up."
"I can. We said we'd buy land sophomore year."
"We did," she smiles with realization. "I remember all the years we lived with my granny. Pallets on the floor 'cause we didn't know how long we'd have to stay. I still never forgave Cort for burning down our first house. We had it all. Burned to a crisp."
He knows the story is an example of how unstable and unsure her childhood was. Now she reflects that her past shouldn't determine her future. She can't live in fear because of it. He feels the same way.
"I'm scared," Magenta admits.
"You don't have to be scared," they stand close to one another.
"Are we doing the right thing? Do you think we'll be good parents?" It's a loaded question.
"We talked about some thought provoking shit in grief counseling the other week... The counselor asked, if your father was involved in street activity, and now you're involved in it, did he fail?"
"What do you think?"
"My Daddy wanted different for me. He wanted me to finish college. He had a whole plan and I was hardheaded. Parents do the best they can with the tools they have. No one's a perfect parent."
She nods in understanding. "You're right. I do know sharing this allows me to connect with you in different ways that I probably never imagined."
He nods before kissing her, "Thank you." He hugs her again this time the air is filled with laughter and joy.
Later that day, Gee drives towards his mother's home with Seven in the passenger seat. Of course Seven's annoyed that his brother, Cortlen, or Choice won't let him out of their site. It's for his own protection.
Gee's phone begins ringing, so he answers it despite the number not being saved nor familiar. "Hello? Who is this?"
"Hello, we're investigators looking into the death of Destin Dent. Is this Genesis Wilson?"
Gee's stiff wondering why they're calling him. He decides to act as natural as possible. "Wassup?"
"We were looking through Destin's call log and you were among one of the people he talked to on his last day before disappearing. What did you two talk about?"
"He called to wish me happy birthday."
"Did you talk about anything else? Did he mention anything alarming?"
Gee's natural thoughts are don't talk to the police. Then he thinks he can use this moment to his advantage.. "Uh, he did mention something actually... He told me if he ended up dead it was his family. He said he just wanted somebody to know. In case something happened to him. I didn't think anything of it, but I should've. Shame how they did him," he puts on a heartbroken voice.
It's not a lie. Destin did say that.
"How did he sound? Sad, mad, stressed, worried?"
"He sounded concerned. He said he was going away to a friends island in the Bahamas for awhile. He never made it, damn."
"Anything else you can tell us? Maybe who he has as enemies?"
"Nah, that's all I can tell you. That's all I know. Sorry I can't help more," he ends the call.
Seven laughs looking out of the window. "I don't know why they're investigating so hard. It's what he deserved. His time was running out. Let a snow roach shenan once, they gon' shenanigan, but not anymore." He smacks on a piece of gum making himself crack up.
"You think this shit is funny?" Gee cracks. "This is serious!"
"Whatever," Seven smacks his lips.
"There's a running joke that they don't solve no damn murders in Houston. Kill who you want to. That's how sorry the police department is. You might've got off on that robbery.. Choice might've gotten away with Fade's murder.. But you're not invincible. Destin was in Las Vegas and the L.A. D.A. has a vested interest in it since he was their informant. Oh, and he's related to the Mob!"
"And we'll deal with whatever comes. The fuck?!"
"We'll means we will. That's the problem. You count on that we to save yo ass. Ever since you came to Texas you've been dragging me into shit with your reckless ways. Take accountability for the shit you do!" Gee points his finger as they sit at a red light. "Fade, Big Bleak.. Shit, ChaCha's death stemmed from Fade getting killed. All your fault."
He can see Seven's clenching jaw go slack. He can't believe Gee's blaming it all on him. "You take accountability!" he shouts. "I'm no different from you. You told me everything you did at my age. Fade, Kasino.. JuJu died 'cause of you, nigga! Look in the mirror!"
"We're not talking about the past. We're talking about now. I've been done with that street shit, but I got sucked back in trying to protect you. This shit is old. I made it too far to go to prison or end up six feet under. If you ain't scared of the streets, you've never really been in shit. I've faced real time. I got shot and thought I was gonna die!" He punches one fist into the other palm.
"I've had guns pointed at me, been arrested, all'at too."
"And clearly it ain't enough. You need to be shook the fuck up, bitch, and it won't be at my demise. You're fucking up my household, and I'll be damned!"
"How am I fucking up your household? You a grown ass man with choices," Seven argues.
"And right now it's looking like the family you create is priority over the family you're born into. I have to think about my future wife and children. They come first," Gee's voice is brittle.
Seven's hardened face now looks disappointed. "I'm your brother. You gonna put other people before me?"
"If that's what it means."
"I don't have nobody. You're all I have with Daddy gone. You have your mother. I don't have my mama," Seven's eyes become glossy.
Seven hasn't seen his mother in six months. The last time he saw her was before Thanksgiving. They hadn't spoken to each other either. That's until she called asking him for money a few weeks ago.
When he said no she started ranting about how she "didn't get a red cent from Genaro's death." Who knows why she thought she would. They weren't married. She was mad it all went to Gee, Misty, and Seven. She felt like she deserved something.
Based on principle, Tiffany felt like her son should've broke her off somethin' out of the goodness of his heart. She failed to realize they didn't get much due to Genaro's gambling debts. They got his paid off house, the car Gee bought him, and whatever was in the house.
Because Seven got his old house, she felt like her son should've let her live in it rent free. As opposed to renting to strangers. She'd rather him make no money off it and go back to selling drugs if she gets a free place to stay.
"I can't crash out behind you. I gotta put myself first. You want me to change my mind you need to figure this out on your own. Save yourself."
Before Seven can respond, Gee's phone rings again. He quickly answers not checking the caller i.d.. "Hello? Who is this?" he says with frustration.
"This is Shoshana Dent. Destin's sister..."
___________
Magenta keeping the baby? Do you think she's making the right decision?
Should Gee cut Seven off? Or give him another chance to get right?
Drop any other thoughts.
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