Chapter 15
Our relationship was smooth-sailing. I didn't know if it was because we're both adults or if it's because we're already both certain that this was what we wanted, hence, we're doing everything to make it work. We're both busy with our careers, but never kaming nagreklamo dahil doon. I mean, sure, sometimes, mayroong mga cancelled na lakad, but instead of complaining about it, I actually take it as an opportunity to arrange the apartment or to catch up on sleep. Seriously, complaining about things exhausts me—lalo na if alam ko naman na hindi controlled ni Chester iyong nangyayari. Hindi naman pwede na bigla siyang umalis in the middle of his duty.
When I heard a knock on the door, I quickly went there. Mama already told me na pupunta siya rito, so there's no surprises there. Pagbukas ko ng pinto, she was holding a bouquet of fresh flowers.
"Thank you!" I said because I love fresh flowers. If hindi lang ako nagtitipid, I'd always buy fresh flowers because it just adds something to the atmosphere of the house.
"Si Chester?" Mama asked.
"Duty," I simply replied because alam na ni Mama iyon.
It had been more than a month since I moved in here. When I was trying to tell my parents about my plan na mag-move in sa apartment ni Chester, ang tagal kong nag-practice! Tapos when I finally told them about my plan, they were very chill about it.
"So... that's it?" I asked because they were weirdly casual about the fact that their favorite child was leaving the nest!
Mama and Papa both shrugged. "This is hardly surprising," Mama said. Papa nodded in agreement.
"Should I be offended?" I asked.
"Not at all," Mama said. "We just know you," she added. "Besides, you're of age. And we like Chester."
Then the conversation shifted to Mama asking me if I wanted help to decorate my new place.
"I'll see you this Friday," Mama said.
"Of course!" I replied because there's no way I'd miss her birthday celebration. Naka-plan na 'yan palagi. If may duty ako, I'd find a way para makipagpalit. So far, okay naman palagi.
"Fred's invited," Mama said. "Do you think Chester will be okay?"
Hindi agad ako nakasagot. To be completely honest, hindi ako sigurado if okay lang kay Chester. I mean, hindi naman sa gagawa siya ng scene sa birthday ni Mama... But there's a chance na tahimik lang siya kagaya nung nangyari nung mabanggit lang nang once iyong Papa niya.
It was a sore spot for him.
I wished we could discuss that... but ayoko rin kasi talaga na ipilit.
"I'll ask him," I replied.
Mama nodded. "If he doesn't want to attend, tell him it's fine. We'll just have another celebration na tayo lang na family."
I love that she sees Chester as family na rin. Alam ko hindi pa kami ganoon katagal ni Chester, but more than my boyfriend, I see him as my partner. Like what he said, I also plan to have a future with him. And I love that my family's considerate of what he'd feel if makita niya si Tito sa birthday ni Mama.
Mama didn't like cleaning kagaya ko. She basically just sat on the couch and read a magazine that she brought with her habang naglilinis naman ako. After a while, she probably got bored kaya nagpaalam na siya na aalis na siya—I was pretty sure na si Rhys naman ang guguluhin niya.
I was in the middle of preparing for my duty when the door opened. I saw Chester holding a cup of coffee.
"Is that mine?" I asked because the coffee looked like hindi pa naiinuman. Chester nodded. "Aww, thank you!" I said as I walked towards him. I got the coffee and kissed his cheek.
"Next week same duty na ulit tayo," he said.
"Miss mo na ako?" I asked kasi halos two weeks na ata na hindi in-synch iyong duty namin.
He nodded. "Walang maingay sa St. Matthew's."
I frowned. "Mean."
He just laughed tapos ay napatingin siya sa flowers na nakalagay na sa vase ngayon. "Binili mo?" he asked.
"Nope, dumaan si Mama," I replied. "Besides, you know that I won't voluntarily buy flowers for myself. They're expensive," I added as I frowned. Soon, in the future perhaps, gusto ko ng garden and ako na lang magtatanim ng flowers.
Tumango lang si Chester. He went inside our room. Nakasunod ako sa kanya. I was half-enjoying watching him strip his clothes off his body and half-preparing to tell him about Mama's birthday.
"You're acting weird," sabi niya habang nakatanggal na iyong pangtaas niya.
"What? Can't I admire my boyfriend's body?"
He looked down to look at the body that I was talking about. I mean, wala siyang abs, but I love his body! His body's lean—besides, iyong eyes niya naman ang favorite part ko ng katawan niya. He looked at me like he was even more suspicious sa sinabi ko.
"Fine," I said. "Mama invited us sa birthday niya."
He nodded. "Kailan?"
"This Friday na."
"May duty ata ako nun, pero gawan ko ng paraan," he replied tapos kumuha na siya ng boxers and shirt sa drawer. He was about to remove his pants, but he looked at me suspiciously again bago siya naglakad papunta sa CR para doon magpalit.
Paglabas niya, nagulat siya na nakatayo ako roon.
"May gusto ka bang sabihin pa?" he asked while looking at me.
I drew a deep breath. "Well... you know how my parents and your dad is in the same social circle..." I said and the expression on Chester's face told me that he already understood what I'd been dancing around.
"Okay," he said. "What about that?"
Instead of answering, I just shrugged.
"Ayaw ba ni Tita na pumunta ako?"
My eyes widened. "What? No!" mabilis kong sagot kasi baka isipin niya na pumunta si Mama dito specifically to tell him na hindi siya pwede pumunta sa birthday.
"Okay?"
"It's just... I don't want you to feel like you need to come," I said. I didn't know if I was choosing the right words, but I sincerely did hope that I was. "If you'll be uncomfortable, we can just skip it."
Tumingin siya sa akin. "Hindi ka pupunta sa birthday ng Mama mo?"
"I mean..." I said, unable to continue because I really would like to come and celebrate my mom's birthday. We're very close and alam ko naman na tumatanda na sila. Tapos hindi na ako doon sa bahay nakatira. I wanted to spend as much time with them as I could.
"Kapag nakahanap ako ng kapalit sa duty, punta ako," he said.
I nodded. "Okay," I replied with a smile because that was good enough for me.
"Kapag hindi, punta ka pa rin sa birthday," he told me. I remained silent. "Obviously, we grew up in very different households. You're close to your parents. Don't skip on your mom's birthday on my account," he added.
I sighed. "I know... but I just want you to feel that you're not alone."
He shrugged. "I know I'm not alone now—I have you."
I smiled. "Damn right, you have me."
I saw him fighting a smile, but I knew that if I had my way, I'd be seeing a huge grin on his face. "But seriously, you don't always have to feel the need to accompany me—sanay akong mag-isa."
I didn't even try to fight the frown that was forming on my face. Mabilis akong lumakad papunta sa kanya at niyakap siya. I hugged him as tightly as I could and buried my face against his chest.
"You'll never be alone again, I promise," I said.
"Paano kung gusto ko mapag-isa?" he asked in a teasing tone.
"Doon ako sa kwarto tapos dito ka sa living room," I replied as I hugged him even tighter.
I felt his arms around me. "I'll really try to go."
"Only if you can," I replied. "Don't feel like you need to go."
I felt him kissing the top of my head. "I'm sorry you're caught in between."
"I'm not caught in the middle," I said. "I'm always on your corner," I added as I looked at his beautiful face. I reached for his cheek and gently caressed it. "I won't force you to talk to me, but if you... I don't know... feel like talking about it... I'm all ears, I promise."
He was staring at me like he was staring at the depths of my soul.
"I don't hate my dad," he said. "I'm... indifferent."
I didn't say a word.
I just hugged him again and let him vent whatever it was that he wanted to let out. How heavy it must be to carry all that for so long...
"But I also don't like to talk about him."
"I'm sorry," I whispered.
"But I guess I should," he replied.
I just hugged Chester tighter.
"I took up nursing because when Mama got sick, ako iyong laging nagbabantay sa kanya," he began. "Siguro sa mga kapatid ko, ako iyong pinakahuli na magiging okay kay Papa," he continued. "I can't talk about my siblings dahil may problema din naman 'yung mga 'yon... But I really couldn't just, for the life of me, understand what was going on inside his head when he chose to go to work while his wife was slowly dying."
There was a long stretch of silence after that.
"I didn't want to be there," he said. "I didn't want to listen to her talking about what I should do after she died," he added and I felt him laughing a little. "Lyle should've been there but he didn't want to be there. Charlie's too scared. Si Cha at Chase bata pa."
I felt him hugging me again.
"Even when I'm talking about him, I still can't feel anything," he said. "I just think about how tired I was back then. And how he should've been there instead of me."
Tumingin ako sa kanya.
"I'm sorry you had to go through that," I told him. Ako ngayon na matanda na, sobrang naaapektuhan pa rin ako kapag may namamatay sa pasyente ko. By now, I still cry a little whenever someone would die. Sometimes, I'd go out of the hospital and just walk it off kasi I still needed to be strong for my other patients. I could be sad, but I needed to be stronger because I still needed to fight for those who are still fighting the good fight.
But to go through that at a young age? How jarring that must be.
He gave me a small smile.
"Pero hindi ako galit sa mga kapatid ko," he said. "It's just that it would've been nice kung may kasama ako nun."
I hugged him again. Hindi ko kasi alam kung ano ang sasabihin ko. I really wanted to console him, but I didn't know how to. It was hard. I never felt alone because I always had someone—my parents, si Rhys, and even si Iñigo...
Alam ko we met at the perfect time.
But at this moment, I really wish we met sooner so he didn't have to go through that alone. I could've been there with him.
My phone alarmed—reminding me that I needed to prepare for my duty. We broke the hug. I looked at Chester.
"What?" he asked.
I shook my head. "Just one question—you wanted to become a nurse because of that?"
He nodded. "The nurses became my family when my own family couldn't show up," he said, shrugging casually, but for some reason, that just broke my heart.
I bridged the distance between us and hugged him again.
"I'm your family now," I told him. "You'll never be alone. I promise."
**
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