Hindi naman talaga siya madaling magselos. Actually, hindi talaga. One time Risa asked her bakit hindi? Nagtampo pa ito because it seemed daw na she doesn't care. However, she was quick to reassure her na it's because she trusts her and secured lang talaga siya sa kung anong meron sila. Dahil totoo rin naman, despite Risa being lapitin ng mga asungot, she knows Risa wouldn't do anything to jeopardize their relationship. So, she lets them be nalang. Hindi rin naman niya puwedeng dakmain ang mga ito everytime they look at her Pangga. Hindi rin naman niya masisisi. Sino ba naman ang hindi mapapatingin kay Risa?
She's stunning. Napakaganda. It didn't help na sobrang bait pa at napakatalino. She's gentle and compassionate, but she can also be fierce and she would definitely fight you with everything she has if it meant protecting her loved ones. Paanong hindi mo gugustuhin to be with someone like that diba? It would take her forever if she starts listing the reasons why anyone would want Risa in their lives, but then hindi 'yon ang point. Ang point ay, naiinis siya ngayon. Sa sobrang inis she wants to rip someone's eye out.
"Hoy, Leon. Baka gusto mong ikalma 'yan. Kanina mo pa tinitignan si Ris at yung kasama niya." Kiko whispered. Nasa holding area sila ngayon waiting for the program to start. Medyo ilang araw na rin silang hindi nagkikita ni Risa. It didn't help na the last time they talked nagkatampuhan pa sila.
Before they could sort things out, Risa left the next day for an out-of-town engagement. Since then, radio silence. She would send messages through her staff just to check up on her. Ganoon din naman si Risa. Kahit nalang palihim. Their kids, upon knowing about it, teased them. Puro kalokohan sa group chat nila. Mga lowkey patama na para raw silang mga bata, but Risa only replied with a serious message telling them to stop. Wala man lang emojis and walang term of endearments. The kids then knew na whatever is going on must be serious. Known for being bubbly in their group chat and for calling them with various endearments, the seriousness of their Mama Ris' chat got them to stop.
Instead, they resorted to sending personal messages towards her. May group chat na nga silang Oplan Fix LenRisa. One where Ris is not a part of. That's when Leni knew that whatever tampo her girlfriend had or seems to be still harboring, seeing as she's still ignoring her, it's really serious. Kaya naman she's keen on fixing things today kaya nga lang itong asungot na Governor sa probinsyang pinuntahan nila eh mukhang nakikisapaw pa kaya hindi tuloy siya makadiskarte. Hence, the glare and ripping someone's eye out energy.
She kept on watching them. Pansin naman niyang Risa is politely entertaining the Governor. Hindi niya maiwasang mapabusangot everytime Risa would smile or laugh lightly at whatever the Governor is saying. Again, hindi siya selosang tao. Pero feel niya eh ginigisa siya ngayon sa kinauupuan niya.
Kiko nudged her again, "Nakikipagkwentuhan lang daw sabi nung staff. Inabangan daw nung Governor sa tent eh. Hindi naman daw makatanggi si Ris."
"Bakit naman inabangan pa? At tska bakit nakahiwalay ng tent? Puwede naman dito kasama natin. Ang laki-laki nito oh."
"Baka nga kasi crush si Risa. Alam mo naman 'yang jowa mo lapitin. Haba rin ng buhok eh." That only made her glare at Kiko. Kiko then raised his arms as if he's surrendering, "Oh, hindi ako ang kalaban. Messenger lang. 'Yon ang sabi ng staff eh."
Leni then averted her gaze. Again, she looked at where her Pangga is at hanggang ngayon nakabuntot pa rin yung asungot na Governor dito. Another thing that's grating on her nerves is the fact na hindi pa rin siya tinitignan ni Risa. Ano na Pangga, naging invisible na ba talaga ako?
Kanina pa niya ito tinitignan and they have a knack for this thing. They know when someone is staring at them specifically pag sila ang nakatingin sa isa't isa kaya she knows that Risa can feel her stare and the fact na hindi siya nito nililingon eh talaga namang nakakadagdag sa inis niya. Not at her pero doon sa Governor na kulang na lang eh sundan si Risa hanggang sa comfort room.
When she saw Risa excusing herself from the conversation, Leni took that opportunity to follow her. For sure, her Pangga would freshen up lalo na at katatapos lang nito kumain. She followed her in the direction of the comfort room. One of Risa's staff saw her, she subtly told her na huwag maingay since Risa seems to be oblivious to her surroundings. The staff nodded leaving them to it.
When Risa entered the comfort room, she inserted herself before she could close the door. She can see that her Pangga was surprised, she then closed the door and locked it. Tinignan lang siya nito as if to say na ano bang ginagawa niya. If they were good, Risa would be grinning at her. Probably already kissing her, but then hindi nga sila okay.
When she didn't budge, Risa entered one of the cubicles na parang hindi man lang siya nage-exist. That didn't deter her if not, mas gusto na talaga niyang ayusin yung naging tampuhan nila. Miss na niya ang Pangga niya.
When Risa was finished doing her business, she went out to wash her hands. Pinapanood lang naman niya ito. Their eyes met over their reflection in the mirror. Risa was the first one to look away. She let out a deep sigh and walked toward her.
"Ga, sorry na." She said, when Risa still didn't respond but instead kept on washing her hands, Leni hugged her from behind. Wrapping her arms tightly around Risa's waist.
"Uy, pansisnin mo naman ako. Konti nalang iisipin ko na talagang invisible ako. Ga, sige naman na oh. Miss na miss na kita." She held on tighter. Resting her head against Risa's back.
"Hindi ka invisible, Leonor." She didn't let go when Risa moved to take a couple of tissue papers to wipe her hands. Basically, para siyang batang nakangunyapit dito.
"Eh hindi naman pala pero hindi mo man lang ako pinapansin. Hindi mo man lang ako nililingon." That seemed to be the wrong words to say since she felt Risa stiffened. Napapikit nalang siya. Shit, she thought.
Risa disentangled herself from her hug, "Ikaw pa talagang may ganang magsabi niyan? After what happened last time? Bakit pinansin mo ba ko don sa huling event? Nalimutan mo nga ata na you asked me to ride with you tapos malaman laman ko nalang the seat was already taken. Tama ba 'yon, Leonor? Ni hindi mo nga ata naalala kasi parang wala lang nangyari sa'yo. Hindi mo man lang naisip na baka nasaktan ako. Muntik pa akong walang masakyan kasi I already told my staff na sayo na ako sasabay buti nalang Chel was still in the area kaya nakasabay pa ako. Kaya nakauwi pa ako... kaya pasensya na ha kung hindi ako okay at hindi kita pinapansin."
"Ga, hindi ko naman kasi alam na sasabay pala siya. I was just as surprised as you. Hindi ko naman puwedeng sabihin na ayoko siyang isabay kaya hiniyaan ko nalang din."
Risa let out a humorless laugh, "Right. Whatever makes you sleep at night, no? Ni hindi mo nga ako tinanong anong mali. You only knew that I was not okay that we're not okay when I started ignoring your messages. I was ready to let it go kasi naiintindihan ko naman na he likes you. I mean you're you, so understandable and I trust you. I know you wouldn't do anything about it. If anything, I can see you deflecting whatever advances he's doing. Ang ikinasasama ng loob ko eh yung hindi mo man lang narealize na mali yung ginawa mo nung gabing 'yon. You really thought I was okay with it. Na hindi man lang ako nasaktan. I was there, Leni. You saw me. Nakatayo sa daan, waiting for you to invite me in. To let your staff know na sayo ako sasabay but what did you do? You looked at me and waved at me. Nagpaalam ka pa and you left me there na parang hindi mo ko inimbitahan na sumabay sayo."
Leni reached out, god she really screwed up didn't she? She told the kids what happened, all of it. Hindi man nila directly masabi, she can feel their disappointment. She felt the HontiBaraqs' disappointment. Sinta, barely replied to her messages after that. Ianna, left her on seen. Her Tres Marias outright told her she really has to grovel. Her critics indeed.
"I'm really sorry, Ga. I know naging insensitive ako. Please, I really am sorry. Ano bang puwede kong gawin for you to forgive me? Sabihin mo at gagawin ko."
Risa shook her hand off, politely letting it down as if she's another person trying to make a move, "Nangyari na Leni. Nasaktan mo na ako. Let me process it. Hayaan mo na muna ako."
"Ga naman.." She tugs on Risa's wrist, "Please, let's not leave it at this. Kailan pa ulit kita makikita? Please let's fix this."
Risa wasn't able to reply since they were interrupted by a knock on the door. It was one of Risa's staff, "Ma'am? Magsisimula na raw po yung event. Hinahanap na po kayo sa labas."
Risa cleared her throat, "Tapos na rin ako. Palabas na rin. Thank you." Risa then looked at her, "Tara na magsisimula na raw yung event. For sure hinahanap ka na rin."
She was about to go out, but Leni only held on tighter, "Ga.."
"Not now, Leni. May kailangan tayong gawin." With that, Risa shrugged her off and went out.
When she got out, Kiko's already waiting for her, "Okay na?" He asked when she stood beside him. She only shook her head no, "Bawi ka nalang mamaya." Kiko assured her, giving her shoulder a light tap to try and lighten her mood. She nodded and gave him a small smile. Sana nga, she thought.
They were already seated when Risa was called on stage, people applauded. She watched as she greeted their colleagues. Nakikipag fist bump ito. Risa gave her one, since hindi naman puwedeng hindi. She then looked at the person beside her at sa kasamaang palad katabi niya pala yung Governor. Tignan mo nga naman kapag minamalas malas ka talaga.
The Governor was obviously elated upon seeing Risa, even before Risa could offer her first for a bump the Governor had his out already, when Risa did give him a fist bump, Leni can see that the Governor was about to reach out for her Pangga. Leni, who is not selosa at all, reached out for Risa's wrist. She tugged on it, giving the Governor a look. Risa looked at her and she held her gaze. Yes, Ana Theresia, makuha ka sa tingin.
She can see that despite Risa's full-on smile, her Pangga gulped. Leni couldn't help but feel a little elated. May effect pa rin naman pala siya sa girlfriend niya kahit nalang galit ito sa kanya. Risa sat beside her throughout the event. Para namang torture since ang lapit lapit nito sa kanya pero hindi siya nito pinapansin. She tried catching her gaze pero umiiwas talaga ito. Ang ikinakainis pa niya eh laging kausap yung Governor.
Throughout the event, she would feel Kiko giving her a slight nudge, or would whisper na itigil niya yung pag-irap doon sa Governor. Anong magagawa niya eh nakakainis naman kasi talaga. When she heard Risa laugh hindi niya na talaga napigilan. She once again, tug on Risa's wrist. Oo na, nakakailan na siya at wala na rin siyang pakialam sa pictures o kung sino man makakakita. She needs to get her attention. Oo na rin, papansin siya. Ngayon lang naman.
"Hindi na ako natutuwa, Theresia." She whispered when Risa looked at her and leaned closer so she could hear her.
"Anong pinagsasabi mo diyan, Leonor?" Risa whispered back. Obviously confused.
"Kanina pa 'yang Governor na 'yan ha. Bibingo na sakin 'yan. Isa pa." She said through gritted teeth.
Risa only raised an eyebrow as a response, "Hindi ko na kasalanan 'yon, Leonor. If you want him to stop, tell him yourself." Once again, Risa shrugged her off that night.
When the event ended mas lalo lang silang hindi naging okay. The staff ushered them towards their tents but even before Risa could go far away, Leni once again took hold of her wrist. Risa gave her a sharp look, looking at the hand on her wrist pero Leni didn't let go.
"Una na po kami." She said at the Governor who is obviously waiting for her girlfriend.
"Hindi po muna kayo mag dinner, Ma'am?" The governor asked. Looking at her then at Risa. Aba talaga namang hindi makaintindi. Leni then let go of Risa's wrist, wrapping an arm around Risa's waist instead. Oo na, binabakuran na niya, okay? Baka sakaling maintindihan na nitong Governor.
"Hindi na po. May importante pa po kasi kaming gagawin ni Sen. Risa. Next time nalang po siguro. Salamat po. Lika na, Sen?" She turned to look at Risa pero hindi na niya ito hinayaang sumagot baka kasi tanggihan pa siya kaya hinila nalang niya ito palabas. She waved at Kiko who only gave her a thumbs up and a nod. The rest of their friends also gave her a supportive nod, yung iba tulad ni Sonny nakangiting nakakaloko. Hindi nalang niya ito pinansin at dire-diretso siya sa paglalakad while still holding onto Risa's wrist. Sumusunod naman yung mga staff nila sa kanila.
"Sasabay sakin si Sen. Risa." She said once they were at the parking lot. Her staff nodded naman. Mga pasakay na nga sana but she stopped them.
"Doon na kayo sumakay sa van ni Sen. Sabay-sabay na kayo nung staff niya. Mag dinner nalang din kayo sa labas." She handed them some cash since hindi na nakapag dinner ang mga ito dahil nga dali-dali na niyang isinama si Risa. "May paguusapan lang kami ni Sen." Her staff nodded, getting their things and bidding them goodbye. Dahil wala na rin namang choice si Risa she gave her staff the same instruction.
She waited for Risa to go inside and when she did, agad naman siyang sumakay at isinara ang van. Even before Risa could settle in her seat, Leni cupped Risa's face and gave her a bruising kiss. Leni heard Risa gasping, obviously surprised by her action. Nonetheless, after her initial shock, Risa responded to her kisses. They fought for dominance until they were forced to break their heated kiss when air became an issue. They were both panting and a little breathless after.
"Kung akala mo okay na tayo after that kiss, nagkakamali ka, Leonor."
"I know. Gusto ko lang ipaalala na ang akin ay akin." Risa looked at her incredulously, but she only gave her a smirk as a response. Hala sige, Leni. Bwisitin mo pa lalo. She thought and at the same time prayed, please naman Pangga patawarin mo na ako.
Risa looked away, "Sa ibang araw I might have found it hot but.. After everything.. If that's how you'll apologize then forget it, Leni." Leni let out a sigh, she took hold of Risa's hand. She waited for her to shrug it off but luckily, she didn't so she hold on tighter.
"Look Ga, I know I screwed up. Alam ko naman. Nahuli lang marealize pero alam ko na ngayon. The kids already told me I did. Our HontiBaraqs even left me on seen. Yung panganay natin may long message, Sints was really indifferent. Sila Aiks nasermunan na rin ako. I get it, Mahal. Mali talaga ako that night and I'm really sorry. If I could have a do over, you know I would do it differently pero wala nangyari na at nasaktan na kita. For that, I really am sorry. I wouldn't make excuses because I know what I did was wrong. Gusto ko lang malaman mo na I'm sorry and I want to make it up to you. If you're still not ready to forgive me, naiintindihan ko. I wouldn't force you, but know that I am here and that I'm really really sorry, Pangga." With that, she kissed the back of Risa's hand and let it go.
They were silent after that. Hanggang sa dumating na rin yung driver to drive them to their hotel. She couldn't help but look at Risa from time to time. Nakadungaw lang naman ito sa bintana. She let out a deep breath, gusto man niyang yakapin at hawakan ang kamay nito, she swore na she'll give her time kaya naman kahit mahirap, she let her be. Again, deserve din naman niya.
She texted the kids nalang instead, checking up on them and making sure na okay sila. They asked if okay na sila ng Mama Ris nila but she answered with a hindi niya alam. The kids sent her various sad and crying emojis and GIFs. They wished them safe travels and na sana maging okay na sila ng Mama Ris nila.
With the silence, she can feel the day finally catching up to her, she rested her head against the headrest at di napigilang mapapikit. She was about to doze off when she felt Risa's hand on top of hers. She waited for her to remove it but instead, Risa interlaced their fingers together. However, she still didn't move nor open her eyes. Baka mamaya umaasa lang pala siya dito mahirap na. Enjoyin na lang niya muna.
But then she felt Risa kissing her cheeks and then resting her head against her shoulder, "Oo na.. bati na tayo. Namiss din kita. Kainis ka." Hindi na niya talaga napigilang hindi mapangiti. She let go of her hand only to hug her properly. Risa let out a chuckle.
"Sorry talaga, Pangga. Di na po mauulit." Risa looked at her, "Aba dapat lang, Leonor." Leni saluted at that before giving Risa a proper kiss. After their kiss, they settled back into cuddling.
"Selos ka ba kanina?" Risa asked her. Nudging her lightly, obviously teasing her.
She let out a grunt but she didn't answer, Risa kept on nudging her playfully. Being her usual makulit self.
"Oo na. Selos na. Sobrang selos gusto kong dukutin yung mata nung Governor na 'yon. Kung makatingin eh. Parang anino mo rin. Hindi tuloy ako makaporma buti nalang nag-cr ka. Kaso nag-cr nga hindi pa rin naman nakaporma."
Risa laughed at that, "Selosa naman pala but then again, iyong iyo lang naman ako, Mahal." Hay namiss niya 'yon. Being called Mahal. Oo, na soft talaga siya pagdating kay Theresia.
"Buti naman." She replied smugly earning her a pinch from Risa. She kissed her again before cuddling with her.
The next day, they woke up with a bunch of notifications from their family group chat and Tropang Angat group chat. It was a bunch of photos from the event last night. The photos were of Leni clutching Risa's wrist. May isa pa yung nakatingin siya doon sa Governor.
Sonny being his pang-asar self was of course the numero unong promotor with a teasing caption, "Bakod de Robredo naman pala." That got various laughing reax from the rest of Tropang Angat. Risa laughed at that as well, napailing na lang siya, smiling while watching her Pangga laugh. Hay ang ganda... namiss niya talaga ito.
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huy natutulog pa ba kayo? bakit may notification ng 4:00 am. grabe kayo. :) salamat sa mga nagbabasa :)