19. "Stars, hide your fires; Let not light see my black and deep desires."
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Crack!
The roar of thunder echoed around, shaking my tent with its vengeance.
I blinked at the sound, back in my consciousness, the hazy images of my dreams fading into the crystal-clear surroundings of my tent. I forced myself into a sitting position, rubbing my hands down my face as I groaned.
A shiver of unease worked its way down my spine at the thought of thunderstorms. I thought back to when Abigail and I would huddle together under blankets during storms. I always thought I was comforting her, but I realised Abigail, with her chubby little arms, would hold me to protect me from the storm.
Without her solace, I felt a familiar ache of loneliness sift through me.
I pushed those memories aside and concentrated on finding someone nearby. I didn't want to seek comfort from this murderous pack of wolves, but my choices were grim.
Hurrying out of my tent, I looked around desperately, only to realize that the makeshift camp was empty. There was no wolf in sight, not even Dariel.
My whole body went numb; I couldn't feel anything below the neck. The feeling of emptiness swallowed me whole. My legs shook, and my hands gripped at my sides, desperately seeking solace. Fear lassoed around my neck like a noose.
They must be somewhere nearby, I reassured myself.
Trying to think through the panic, I walked forward without thinking, not wanting to be alone for a second longer. With shaky legs, I kept moving, struggling to trace their scents. I walked deeper into the woods. I should have known it was the wrong place to have come, but where else was there to go?
Despite my heightened vision, it was so dark that I could hardly see. . The clouds covered the night sky, making it pitch black. I wasn't paying as much attention as I should to where I was going. I meandered aimlessly through the thick undergrowth, past fallen ferns and moss-covered cobwebs. There was dead silence, not a single creature scattered past. The night was uninviting, and suddenly, a chill that had nothing to do with the weather made me shiver.
The rancid smell in the air made me stagger. The discomfort hindered my fear, but it was only for a second, until I caught sight of blood smeared across the forest, on every tree, pools of blood watering the overgrowth.
There was so much blood. Everywhere. Human bones jutted out through the soil. My stomach dropped to my knees, and I ripped my eyes away from the sight. I hurried by, hastily running, branches and thorns biting at my flesh to stop me. I stumbled often, but I kept going, forcing myself to keep pushing forward in the hopes of finding someone, anyone.
I froze dead in my spot, when I realised I was not alone. I was being followed.
It was behind me, I couldn't make out its silhouette or scent, but it was cloaked in shadows darker than the night sky.
I paused only for a second before I took off running. In the back of my mind, I felt it was a useless effort, but my survival instincts kept me pushing forward. Despite my best efforts, I felt it grow closer.
Terror flooded through me as I realised my attempt to run was futile. I mentally braced myself through the panic that rose in my chest as I crouched my back, preparing to let my beast consume me.
I stopped before I could phase when I saw him. Past the shadows under the evergreen, I saw dark hair framing an angular face. His high cheekbones accentuated his deep dark eyes. His mouth slowly stretched into a smirk that wasn't cruel as I expected.
I blinked in disbelief, but I found my fear morphing into relief.
"Gabriel." I gasped with a grateful sigh.
Gabriel's eyes flashed to me, his black brows pushing into an anguished frown over his deep-set eyes. My whole body started to hum as I felt his eyes on me. It was strange seeing him standing before me after two weeks without a glimpse of him.
Without another glance, Gabriel started to walk away.
"Wait!" I choked out the word, reaching for him in sheer desperation. I stumbled forward to follow him, but it was too late. I cried out when a sharp pain bit my ankle. The pain tore through my nerves, pulling me to the ground. I clutched my ankle until the pain slowly subsided. I realised a large thorn had lodged itself in my foot.
After managing to pull it out, I found Gabriel watching with unreadable eyes. He hadn't left as I had thought.
When I looked up, I found Gabriel watching with unreadable eyes. We stared at each other for a long moment. It was only for a few seconds that we stared, but it felt like an eternity. He released me, and with a jerk of his head, he signalled that he wanted me to follow him.
I followed at once, quickening my pace with a grateful sigh. We walked in silence for what felt like miles. Gabriel was too busy scanning our surroundings to spare me a glance.
After a while, the wilderness started to thin out as we started to walk an upwards slope. Gabriel scanned our surroundings before heading towards the mountains to the left. I immediately spotted a few caves at its bottom.
The cave was dim and small enough to make me feel claustrophobic. It was empty but ominously quiet, with no chirping of grasshoppers, no hooting of owls. Something about it braced me with instinctive tension.
I sat down carefully, avoiding the damp parts of the stone floor. My thoughts were incoherent. I wasn't sure how I should feel being in such proximity to him after what happened before. I didn't know if I could do this, but I was too scared to be alone. A shiver trickled down my spine as I recalled the last time we were together in a cave. I remembered the strength of his hands as soft as silk against my skin, as the heat from his breath drew chill bumps down my neck.
Gabriel seemed oblivious to my inner turmoil and was more interested in my injury. He kneeled beside me and attempted to examine my foot without touching me.
"I'm all better now," I muttered as I lifted my foot to show him. A small lifted scar had replaced the bleeding.
He nodded but remained beside me. Although I didn't spare him a glance, I could feel him watching me. Every fibre of my being was unbearably aware of him, every move, every heartbeat, every inhale and exhale.
Twisting a piece of my hair and trying not to appear as nervous as I felt, I hesitated before speaking.
"Where is everybody?" I asked.
He stared back coldly, "patrolling."
"And where were you?" I asked with commendable indifference.
Avoiding my curious gaze, he looked away into the darkness as he spoke, "I was hunting."
I almost snorted in disbelief. I didn't know much about hunting, but I was pretty sure that a hunting trip did not take two weeks. Nate and Raphael would only take a few hours to catch wild boars, Elk and Moose. I almost wanted to call him out for it, but I remained silent.
His eyes caught the doubt clouding my gaze, and his lips twitched into an almost smile. "I needed to get away." He spoke cryptically.
I frowned at him. "Why?" I asked, my voice tight.
He was still as a statue. His obsidian eyes hardened and pierced my soul, holding me captive. I sucked in a harsh breath, frozen between the instinctive need to seek comfort in his arms and the human impulse to flee and never look back.
I had never felt this craving before, and it scared me. I realised having Gabriel this close to me awoke a yearning within me. I could feel the heat from his body radiating towards me, melting my insides at the apex of my thighs.
We sat in silence for a moment. The rising sun blooming behind the rain cast a dim glow in the cave.
He stared at me for a minute longer before he spoke. "Because of you." I saw his chest rise and fall as he took a deep breath. "You're too distracting."
I straightened, everything in me tensing. My heart pounded against my ribcage at the words. I cleared my throat, unsure of how to respond.
I chewed on my lips as I mulled over his words. "You distract me too," I muttered, finding my voice.
Distracting me from hating you, I wanted to add.
We were sitting too close for my liking. His leg was pressed against mine, the rough denim scratching against my thigh. Our heartbeats were in sync, and his warm breath fanned the side of my head at every slow exhale.
I braced my back against the wall, feeling uncomfortable with the proximity, but he paid no attention to the movement. And then he made a huge mistake and came closer, encasing me in his scent.
"Can I kiss you?" His voice was so low and dark I could barely hear it even with my preternaturally hearing. He looked uncertain as he swallowed tensely, his Adam's apple bobbing with the motion. He was only inches before me, staring down at me, his face the same unreadable mask, but underneath was a vulnerability that made my heart stutter.
Despite the desire that flooded through me, I felt my spine tense at the words. I was silently screaming at my wolf inside, trying to stop the beast from clawing its way to take control and smash our lips together, satisfying its primal urges.
I didn't want Gabriel to know about the hate I harboured for him. I didn't want him to find out that I longed to destroy him, to enact my revenge. I was afraid to face the consequences, afraid of what he would do to me and my pack.
The wolf within me was growing agitated the more I stalled. I struggled to reign in the beast when my mate was only inches before me. I struggled to clutch onto the shred of control, my knuckles straining white in the process. My heart warned against the thought of kissing him, but the beast inside was drunk with lust and his scent
I was far too close to deny him.
His heady masculine scent surrounded me, the sensation of his jeans rubbing against my thigh, the feel of his warm breath fanning my face, his heart thudding loudly with each passing second.
He was far too close for me to reign in my wolf.
I couldn't think of a way to protest, but the urge to kiss him was too strong. I didn't like this, but I felt control slipping away with each passing second.
This is bad, this is very bad, the voice in my head repeated again and again.
Nodding my compliance, I stayed mute as guilt flooded my limbs. I closed my eyes, trying to block all the shame that flooded my senses, and then I held my breath.
My eyes flew open, however, when I felt a gentle touch on the edge of my jaw. Gabriel traced my jaw with a trembling hand. I didn't flinch, but the softness of his touch sent chills down my spine.
I was held captive in his gentle grip and unable to break free. My nerves prickled, and my flight or fight instinct kicked in. The fluttering butterflies below my stomach made me think my reaction to him was fear. But I have never burned a fire down there when I felt scared.
A shudder rippled down my body, and my head ventured up; the hairs of my ponytail brushed across his chest, making him convulse in response.
I stared into his eyes, almost criss-crossed, because of how close we were. I was surprised to find sanctuary in his midnight eyes. His eyes were the colour of the earth soaked by spring rains. The hue was no longer menacing but warm and promising. I fell so deep inside those eyes that I almost forgot the hatred I stored in my heart.
His expression, for once, was completely unguarded. I caught a glimpse into the darkest depths of his soul. He looked so hopeful, but there was a sadness that brimmed underneath.
His scent drew me in, poignantly alluring, as it mingled with my own. The animal within me stopped its fight and remained still.
Audibly swallowing, his gaze broke free from mine and slowly trailed down my face to my mouth. Licking his lips, he slowly lowered his head toward mine while every fiber of my being quivered with anticipation.
Pulling back from me, he hesitated as he licked his lips, the sound echoing between us. "I've never done this before," he murmured, the words fluttering over my lips.
A whimper caught in the back of my throat as I inhaled his rasping exhale across the distance between us.
I couldn't see him anymore, but his heat enveloped me. I could feel his warmth on my cheek, his hot breath coming closer. My tongue slipped out to hastily moisten my lips.
My palpitating pulse constricted my throat; I couldn't breathe.
We both gasped in shock as our lips met. His lips brushed mine, laying a gentle kiss that shuddered against my skin. I could feel his heat on my mouth as his lips met mine. I didn't know what was wrong with me. I felt my breath quicken, and my toes curl as an overwhelming foreign feeling consumed me.
Hesitantly, Gabriel's arms wrapped around my waist, harnessing me against his rigid body. His warm lips slipped over mine. His palms lurched up to cup the back of my head as he drank from my lips. He tipped his head to the side as he wrapped me in his embrace. Gabriel kissed me like a drowning man seeking the breath of life through my mouth.
My limbs hung limp in overwhelm, but now they awoke as my hands traced the dips of his muscles over his arms and deltoids.
A soft gasp of ecstasy escaped my lips, and my body arched into his hold. He wrapped my sigh around his tongue with a low growl from his throat. I felt the touch of his tongue, and I hesitantly drew him in deeper, capturing his tongue with my own. He shivered against me at the sensation and pressed me against him tighter.
He broke the kiss to release a gasping breath, and sucked the residue off my lower lips before submerging himself back in my throat.
He licked down my throat, siphoning my whimpers with fervent desire. I sucked in his gasps as his hands caressed the curve of my hips while I instinctually pushed into his body.
"Fuck," he ground the word into my mouth as his lips moved against mine at an almost torturous pace. "Harper," He infused my name into my mouth, almost like a confession and a prayer. Hearing my name come from his mouth tightened the coil that sat beneath my stomach and a pulse beat to a thudding rhythm between my thighs. Suddenly, I had an urge to press into him more than I possibly could. I craved the feel of his rough hands skimming the goosebumps that freckled my skin and his powerful weight over me.
Gabriel's hot mouth was demanding as he kissed me with primal hunger. His possessive tongue moving over mine with rough strokes demanding submission. I squirmed under his hold, urging him closer.
Wanting more, I pressed upward, my inner thighs rubbing over the hard ridge of flesh straining against his jeans whilst I shamelessly groaned into his mouth.
My behavior caused him to jerk to a halt.
"No!" Gabriel snarled as he pulled away and bared his teeth.
My whole body stiffened in response.
He was gasping uncontrollably. His rasping breath harsh through his teeth, and his muscles writhed under his skin. His wolf was close.
For a moment, there was no sound except for the harsh exhales of our breaths.
"This will never happen again." His anguished whisper served with rage.
I was immediately sobered into sentience as I felt the pulsing tension ready to explode out of him. His body was tense as he clenched his knuckles as if trying to grip at his sanity.
"I almost took you like some fucking animal." He gasped out, his teeth chattering softly, as he backed away.
Sanity trickled down my spine, and regret filled my bloodstream at his words. I almost let this monster...
I gulped down my bile at the thought.
"My wolf wants you so much..." He choked out as he stared back with tormented eyes.
The words ran through my head, realisation spread through me, and I shivered in response. I was terrified of the control that slipped past at his mere touch. I tried to tell myself that it was a spur of the moment, a one-off event, an outlier. But as much I tried, I couldn't lie to myself. I frowned guiltily, determined to put things back on track.
"Fuck," He gasped, gripping at his short hair. "I don't know who the fuck I am anymore when I'm around you," he hissed. With that, he stalked out of the cave without a backward glance and stormed into the pouring rain.
The air was thick with the stench of my remorse. I clenched my eyes shut in shame; the guilt for what I had done hit me like a freight train. I was ashamed that at that moment, as his lips met mine, I forgot the hatred I held for him, I forgot how he tore my pack and my family apart. I swallowed, trying to dislodge the sudden lump in my throat. The guilt made my shoulders slump.
I wasn't ready to admit to myself how good it felt to be wrapped in his arms.
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Hey there hot stuff,
How'd you like the new chapter?
What do we think about the kiss?
Don't forget to comment and vote.
Your stalker,
Morbid Bacon
P.S. If you don't comment and vote I will give turn Harper into Amber Heard.