A/N: I have noticed that my new chapter has more views than the previous one so I think some of you missed a chapter, If you can't understand i would say to read the previous two chapters first... I have roughly 15 chapters left I'm so emotional right now...anyways hope you have a good day :)
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Sirius tapped his fingers on the arm of his chair. "Can we hurry this along?" he asked, sighing.
Severus glared. "Do you have somewhere better to be?"
"Moony's bringing his girl around to see Hogwarts."
"His girl? I thought they broke up," Narcissa said, brow quirked.
Sirius jumped from his chair. "What are you doing here?"
"Black," Severus stalked over to the animagus's spot, "I thought even you would recognize that with my ascension to the role as headmaster someone would need to take my place as potions professor and head of Slytherin."
"What about Slughorn?"
"You called?" the man himself asked, swirling his third whiskey on the rocks in his hand.
Severus rubbed his eyes. "Horace, it is ten in the morning."
"Time for me' mimosa, then."
Sirius shook his head. "I see your point." He crossed his arms. "But won't this cause a lot of unnecessary drama?"
"We have a werewolf, an illegitimate heiress, and another illegitimate child on the way," Severus rolled his eyes, "I don't think there is anything such as more unnecessary drama."
"She's pregnant?" Narcissa asked, pulling out a parchment and quill.
"Who are you getting your information from?" Severus shook his head. "They are far behind the times."
"Parkinson."
"Severus," McGonagall pulled the man's sleeve, "we are getting off track and Sirius does have a point."
"You're not in the tour of Hogwarts, too?" Severus asked, brow furrowed.
"I'm the guide."
"Fine," Severus sighed, reaching for his notes. "First order of business: new additions." He turned to Narcissa, who primped her hair. He scanned the room. "Do we need to go in deeper here?"
Sinistra raised her hand. "Will the Lupin child be considered a new addition?"
"To my house?" Sirius pointed at himself. "Yes. To your house? No. To Hogwarts?" He furrowed his brow. "Well, he is my personal nanny, but…we'll see."
"Next order of business," Severus looked down at the squiggles, "IEPs."
"Moony," Harry asked, hiding his eyes behind his hands. Siria began to mumble and grunt. "Peek-a-boo." The young witch giggled.
"Yes, Harry?" the man asked, coming in from the kitchen.
"How was your tour?" Harry hid his eyes again. "Peek-a-boo."
"It was nice. Annie was uneasy. Minerva asked for the wedding date."
"I'm guessing that didn't help."
"Oh, Minnie," Sirius said, flopping down into the lounge chair. "No concept of personal space."
"You are one to talk, Padfoot," Remus said, brow quirked.
"Did she mention if she was using a doula or going to hospital?"
Remus's face reddened. "Well, I…I never, Padfoot!"
"It's a valid question, Moons."
"The two of you are inconceivable," Severus said, sitting down next to Siria. "It's not a wonder she broke up with you." He glared at the wolf. "She wasn't intimidated by the wizarding world; she didn't want to play second fiddle to your first wife."
"He is most definitely not my wife," Remus said, arms crossed.
"Exactly," Sirius quirked a brow, "I'd be his husband."
"Well," Draco said, stretching as he yawned. "At least we've got that straightened out." He lifted his sleeve to reveal a very sleepy serpent. "Isn't that right, Sevvy?"
"You had to name the serpent after me," Severus groaned, rubbing his head.
"What would you have me name it?"
"Salazar?"
"I'm a Gryffindor," Draco said, mouth dropped in disgust. "I could never name my snake that. It would be blasphemy!"
"Blasphemy?" Dora asked, popping in from the floo. "I thought you were a Slytherin last time." She scrunched her nose. "Maybe I'm getting this all confused, again."
"No, you've got it right," Luna said, popping out from behind the sofa.
"Miss Lovegood," Severus crossed his arms, "how long have you been here?"
"Well, Harry invited me about a week ago…"
"Ho…ho…how?"
"You've been busy, Spots," Sirius said, patting the man's shoulder. "Don't be too hard on yourself."
"I'm a disgrace to the name of spy."
"You weren't that great before."
"You don't know how great I was…"
"You still haven't told me how the tour went," Harry said, hiding his eyes once more. Siria fussed. "Peek-a-boo."
"Yes," Remus shuffled from foot to foot, "it was fine. Annie said she was willing to give this world a shot."
"She broke up because she couldn't handle dating a wizard, but she's a-okay with birthing one?" Dora asked, sipping some water.
"What's she supposed to do, Dora?"
"Well, if I was her…"
"You once were…" Hermione said, apparating in. All in the room stared, mouth aghast.
"How did you…you were…?" Draco said, mouth bobbing.
"Harry had me listening in on the communicators. Once I heard Tonks come in, I figured 'Why not?'."
"Because you didn't want to give your professors a heart attack?" Severus asked, clutching his chest.
"But that would be no fun, Spots."
"Miss Granger…"
Her shoulders sagged and she stared at the ground. "Sorry, Professor."
Dora shook her head. "Anyway, if I was her…"
"Which you were…"
"Not important." She sighed. "I'd decide not to have the child and steal my name."
Remus scrunched his nose. "I'm not naming my child Tonks."
"Teddy, you dolt."
"Oh, of course, I'm naming the baby Teddy…if it's a boy."
"We do not need more baby girls without more women," Regulus said, shaking his head.
"I count three women in this room," Dora said, arms crossed.
"Isn't that enough?
"Anyway," Dora shook her head, ridding herself of errant thoughts, "I came here for a reason, and it wasn't to fight for my name."
"Which you won't get." Remus stood up, crossing his arms.
"Why are you so incessant on naming your son Teddy?"
"To keep timelines straight."
"Not to mention that a child werewolf named Teddy begs to be cuddled," Harry said, pulling Siria close.
Remus dropped into the closest recliner. "I never thought of that…"
"Thought of what?" Severus asked, brow quirked. "That naming your son Teddy could lead to many adoring women?"
"No…" Remus shook his head. "He could be a werewolf."
"That wasn't obvious?"
"He could have the curse."
"As could any werewolf offspring…"
"What was I thinking?"
Sirius sat down next to his friend, patting the man's shoulder. "Obviously not with your head."
"This is what you've done to me, Sirius. I no longer think with my head."
"No," Draco said, petting Severys. "You think with your…."
"Draco!" Hermione called out, clapping a hand over his mouth.
"What?" he mumbled, wriggling to escape her grasp. "I was going to say snake."
"These poor children," Regulus shook his head, "are going to be speaking in sexual innuendos by the time they're five."
"I guess now is not the best time to bring up my wedding plans…" Dora said, sighing.
"If it's really that important, we can leave…" Severus said, rubbing his fiancee's shoulders.
"….And leave your friend in need of comfort?"
"Friend? I think more like science experiment."
"Aww," Sirius jumped up, hugging Severus. "I didn't know you cared so much."
"Science experiment is not a kind term, Black."
"Umm, help," Dora said, hacking as she wriggled out of the Black-Snape hold. Sirius squeezed even more.
"Dora, help." Severus wheezed.
"Well," Dora stood up, finally free of the two men, "I will see you two tomorrow…when everyone's not super emotional." She shook her head. "I need at least one level headed person planning this wedding."
Regulus raised his hand. "Can I come with?"
"Do you mind talking different shades of purple?"
"I can even give a soliloquy on the pros and cons of lilac."
"Ahh," Dora grabbed her cousin by the shoulder, "you're the sister I never had."
"I'm a guy."
"Even better."
The two left, arms linked. Harry watched as they disappeared into the floo.
"So, what should we do next?" Harry asked, cuddling deeper into the couch.
"Find the next horcrux?" Severus suggested, picking up his latest potions journal.
"I was thinking within the next few hours, but…"
"He does have a point," Hermione said.
"Yeah, but…"
"But what?" Draco asked, nose scrunched. "You were hoping your best friend Ron would take a nine-month journey with you into the quest that is destroying all horcruxes?"
"Draco…" Hermione sighed, rubbing her eyes.
"No," Draco said, pouting, "I know what you were thinking. You were going to go on this grand adventure with Weasley and leave me out of it."
"Why would we do that?"
"Because of timelines…"
Hermione shook her head. "I think we've thrown the timeline out the window."
"Anyway…" Severus rubbed his face. "Miss Granger is correct. I do have a good point. However, it does not include you taking a nine-month camping trip. Especially with Weasley…"
"Thank you," Hermione said, crossing her arms. "I was thinking that the camping trip from hell could be avoided. Finally, someone agrees."
"But. How?" Harry asked.
"Have you completely forgotten the fact we know where they are?"
"So where is that pesky locket again?" Harry crossed his arms. "Because last I checked, Umbridge couldn't have taken it while she's in Azkaban."
"Well," Sirius said, eyes rolling over the Daily Prophet, "it could always be Fudge." He held up the paper, showing Fudge's maniacally laughing face.
"How'd he get it?" Draco asked, brow furrowed.
"Well, you said that Fate and Time told you there were fixed points which you could not change," Severus started, his hands interlacing. "It seems to me that there are in fact specific fixed events that cannot be changed in their entirety. For example, your continual issue with that inane hippogriff third year." The man stared at his fingernails. "Yet, it was not Draco that caused the beast's demise this past time, was it?"
"No," Draco and Harry said together.
"So," Hermione said, eyes narrowed, "what you're saying is that Fletcher had to steal it…but the person who confiscated it was a neutral point. It could have been anyone."
"Anyone in the ministry…" Severus corrected gently. "Whoever found him had to be from there…otherwise, it would have caused a significant issue with legality."
"And this is not a significant issue with legality?"
"I said legality, Miss Granger, not morality." Severus shook his head. "Anyway, Padfoot why do you feel Fudge is it?"
Sirius held up the picture. "Because he's wearing the locket."
The rest of the group zeroed in on the man's neck. Clear as day rested the locket, the S prominent on Cornelius Fudge's chest.
Severus shook his head. "Well, I'll be damned."
"So," Harry squinted at the article, "we have to infiltrate the ministry again?"
"You could," Sirius said, folding up the paper. "We'd need some Polyjuice and a few ministry officials…"
"And Black is leading you on a frivolous quest that will waste time and get you nowhere." Severus snatched the paper from the animagus.
"Why do you say that, Professor?" Hermione asked, brow furrowed.
"Because it says right here that Fudge was taken to Azkaban for selling ministry secrets."
"To whom?" Luna asked, laying upside down on the couch. "Seems a bit far-fetched to be Voldemort."
"Unnamed party…" Severus read, glancing up to gauge their reactions. "Would any of you have an idea of who that might be?"
"Could be Pious Thicknesse," Draco said, watching Severys curl around his fingers. "It could easily have been a sting operation."
Hermione shook her head. "I need to get you off of those muggle crime novels."
"You could always give me something better to do."
"Here's another collection of Encyclopedia Brown."
Draco scrunched his nose. "Yes, dear, that's exactly what I was talking about."
Harry jumped up and dusted off his pants. "Well, while the rest of you sit here discussing who Fudge was talking to, I'm going to Azkaban and getting that darned locket."
"Hold on!" Sirius said, grabbing the boy by the shoulder. "Aren't you forgetting something?"
The boy patted down his pants pockets. "Wallet, keys, wand…nope, got it all."
"My permission?"
"Why would I need that?"
"Sirius has a reasonable expectation of respect," Severus said, folding the newspaper across his lap.
Remus scowled. "Which is very surprising."
"What do you want me to do?" Harry folded his arms. "Wait around until Voldemort places his stupid taboo and we're all forced to stand around with our heads in our arses?"
"Harry, I think you're forgetting one important thing."
"What?"
"A plan," Sirius said, glaring. "As your godfather, there is no way on earth I'm letting you barge in there all brash and brazen-like."
"All brash and brazen-like?" Severus furrowed his brow. "I thought that was your motto."
"Well, now I have a new motto: don't do something stupid."
"And when did you learn that?" Remus asked, hands thrown in the air.
"Somewhere between my best friends dying and my brother coming back to life."
Harry sighed long-sufferingly and plopped back into his seat. "Fine, have it your way! We'll plan it out first."
"Thank you," Sirius said, throwing out a rolled piece of parchment. "Fresh off the presses."
Hermione unrolled the parchment to reveal a detailed layout of Azkaban. Her eyes narrowed. "When did you have time to make this?"
"When you have eight hours a day of unsupervised time, you get bored." Sirius shrugged. "There were only so many pranks a dog could do before he decided to do something constructive."
"And why a map of Azkaban?"
"I already had one of Hogwarts."
"Enough," Severus said, rubbing his eyes. "I don't have the time for this. We have an hour before I need to be back at Spinners End to have tea with Narcissa and Bellatrix."
"Why?" Draco asked, nose scrunched.
"We have to spend some time together scheming."
"Anyway…" Hermione pulled the map closer to herself. "So, here's Bellatrix's old cell. IT looks like Umbridge has taken that spot."
"Yeah," Luna scrunched her nose, "her trial didn't last long, did it?"
"They had multiple victim accounts and physical proof of the black quill." Remus rubbed his hands together, a grin spreading across his face. "Twenty life sentences plus a kiss thirty years in…Quite a just punishment, wouldn't you say?"
"Not the point," Severus said, pulling closer to the map. "It appears they placed Fudge in your old cell, Black."
"Also a just punishment," Hermione said, her nose scrunched. "Serves the bugger right for not listening to us."
"Hermione Jane Granger!" Harry said, mouth agape. "Language."
"Would you rather bastard?"
"Thank you."
"Does this here show horcruxes?" Draco asked, peering deeper.
"Yes," Sirius said, head tilted, "because all map-makers know how to create horcrux trackers."
"Would've been useful," the blond mumbled.
Severus sighed as he stood. "I must be going. Cissa will be angry if I'm tardy." He turned, glaring at the crowd of Gryffindors and lone Ravenclaw. "Do not do anything until I have returned and heard your plan of action."
"Yes, Mum," Sirius said, eyes rolling.
"Sirius Orion Black, I mean it." Severus growled. "You are not only my soon-to-be cousin, you are also my friend and the father of a beautiful young girl I care about." He glared. "And I hate you for making me say that aloud. Do not throw yourself into danger without my express say-so."
Remus glared at Sirius as the dark man departed. "I didn't do anything half as bad as you and I'm still just a science experiment."
Draco furrowed his brow. "Actually, I do believe that's a step up from friend. He does enjoy his science experiments."
The crew saw none of Severus (other than in passing) for the rest of the month. As such, they were unable to track down Fudge and get to the locket, much to the consternation of some Gryffindors.
"I just don't understand!" Harry growled, flopping down into their cabin on the train. "Is it so hard for him to say, 'Alright, good work, team. Let's go kill a maniacal mass murderer?'"
"Harry," Hermione sighed, shaking her head for the umpteenth time. "Your godfather cares about you and wants to make sure all your contingencies are accounted for."
"His contingencies can kiss my arse," Draco said, crossing his arms and pouting.
"I miss having only one godfather," Harry said, glaring. He straightened. "Wait, no. I like having multiple godfathers. I just wish they were slightly more irresponsible."
Luna shook her head. "You can't always get what you want, but you can try and sometimes you find you get what you need."
"Luna, where did you hear Rolling Stones?" Hermione asked, eyes narrowing.
"Regulus decided to switch his study from ancient history to modern music."
"But that was modern ten years ago."
"He gained his understanding of modern music from Sirius," Draco said, grabbing a book from his bag. "Blame him."
Meanwhile, Severus stood in front of the group of teachers he was about to disappoint. He'd hoped to only disappoint one woman in his life…why did most of the professors here have to be women? He sat, sighing.
"Is everything alright, headmaster?" Sinistra asked, venom lacing the title.
The dark man rubbed his forehead. "I have some news I must share with you all." He took a deep breath. "I have—of my own free will and volition—decided to ask Minerva to step down from her duties as deputy headmistress."
"What?" Fillius asked, jumping up and down in his chair in anger.
"Why?" Pomona asked, thumping the table.
"Reasons that I do not need to justify to you," Severus said, growling. Minerva patted his shoulder.
"If it helps, he has a point," the transfiguration professor said. "Twenty years ago, I barely had a handle on a crew of miscreants that terrorized the Gryffindor tower." She turned, glaring at Sirius. "And with age, I do not believe I've gained much more control over rambunctious boys."
"Weasleys," Bellatrix coughed.
Sirius yelped, jumping and throwing himself across the room. "What the hell is she doing here?"
"Oh, that," Severus rubbed his scalp, "I forgot that announcement." He sighed. "I have also—of my own free will and volition—hired Bellatrix LeStrange for the position of Muggle Studies professor."
"So, what?" Sirius glared. "Is she going to bring in muggles and cut them open to study?"
Bellatrix's eyes sparkled. "That's a great idea, cousin."
"No!"
"Enough!" Severus silenced the room. He pointed to the empty seat. "Sirius, come sit."
"No, she killed me."
Narcissa stared at him. "Really? You seem very alive to me."
"Well, she wants to."
"I can neither confirm nor deny that," Bellatrix said, shrugging. "But, I want to kill most people, so…"
"Black, sit, now," Severus said, once more pointing to the empty chair.
"She just admitted to wanting to kill most people."
"Sirius." The headmaster smirked as the man gingerly sat down. "Good dog."
"Now, Severus," Minerva said, crossing her arms. "That other announcement?"
"Which one?"
"Who will take over my position?"
"Oh, yes," Severus sighed, rubbing his eyes once more. "I have chosen someone I believe will truly fulfill the need of disciplinarian of the school."
Professor Vector scowled, raising her hand. "But—"
"Save all comments until I have finished my announcement." Severus held up a hand, taking another deep breath. "I have chosen—of my own free will and volition—"
"Can you stop saying that?" Horace slurred.
"I have an unbreakable vow saying I must." Severus closed his eyes. "I have chosen—of my own free will and volition—one…Sirius Orion Black."
Silence filled the air. Magical crickets chirped underneath the window. A hippogriff cried out in the distance.
A chuckle echoed through the room. It grew louder and louder, until Narcissa Malfoy fell to the floor, her body shaking in hysterics. She stood, wiping tears from her eyes.
"Oh, Severus, I never understood your sense of humor, but this is too much," she said, sitting back in her chair.
"This isn't a joke, Narcissa."
"But it has to be…" Pomona said, both hands anchored to the table.
"I do believe Sirius has many qualities that will make him an excellent deputy."
"Name one," Sirius said, mouth agape.
"Well, you were once a very mischievous child. Therefore, you have much more knowledge in how to detect lies, pranks, and other misbehavior."
"That is actually quite true."
"On top of that," Severus said, crossing his arms. "You know what discipline actually deters poor behavior. You have a good handle on the miscreant mind, and you know better than anyone else how to mold that mind for the better."
"Yes," Narcissa said, under her breath. "Throw them in Azkaban for a few years."
"Well," Argus Filch shrugged, standing from his spot at the table, "at least detentions will be down."
The golden trio and Luna sat down at the Gryffindor table. Ron Weasley glared at them.
"What's the Raven doing here?" the redhead asked.
"She's sitting with us," Hermione said, pulling the girl close.
"Since when is that allowed?"
"Well, according to Section Five of the rule book," Draco said, pulling out a copy from his bag, "the head boy and head girl may allow anyone from any house to sit anywhere they would like."
"Head boy? Head girl?" Dean asked, brow furrowed.
"Yes, Harry and Hermione."
"I object!" Lavender said, jumping from her spot. "He wasn't even a prefect!"
"Silence!" Severus called out, allowing his voice to echo throughout the Great Hall. "If the great boy-who-lived would do us the pleasure of quieting down…"
"He wasn't even talking," Draco called out, glaring. The dark man glared back. "As you were…"
"With the sorting complete, it is time for some announcements." Severus scanned the crowd. "As you may be aware by now, we have had a great upset in our faculty dynamics recently…" He smirked. "If you were not aware, you are a plague on society and should kill yourself now."
"Severus!" Minerva scolded.
"Anyway," Severus sighed. "We have multiple new professors, some changes in titles and responsibilities, and I must say I made all these decision of my very own free will and volition…."
"Ah, shut up," Sirius called out, eyes sparkling and mouth twitching.
"Thank you, Black." The headmaster took a deep breath. "Which brings me to my first announcement: with the death of the previous headmaster, I have ascended to the position of head of this school. As it was felt by many people that a young man should not be working over a much older woman with less-than-adequate discipline strategies…"
"Hey!" Harry yelled, arms crossed. "Professor McGonagall's a great teacher."
"With less-than-adequate discipline strategies…" Severus glared at his godsons. They both snapped their mouths shut. "I have decided to place Professor Black under me as deputy headmaster."
"What?" Hermione, Draco, Harry, and Remus cried out in unison.
"Hurray!" Luna cheered, clapping wildly.
"If any of you disagree with my decision…" Severus pointedly stared at the werewolf behind him, "…you may take it up with me personally."
"Oh, I will," Remus said, standing and backing up quickly. He grabbed the thin air and yanked it through the antechamber door. He handed Siria off into the antechamber and came back empty handed.
Severus quirked a brow. "Is everything all better?"
"Yes," Remus nodded, standing against the door. He jerked forward before slamming his back harder. "I'm alright. Are you doing okay, Severus?"
Seamus raised his hand. "If you two are done, we'd kind of like to eat."
"Not quite," Severus said, shaking his head. "It is also true that with my ascension comes a missing potions professor and head of house."
"So, we're back to one potions professor?" Parkinson asked.
"No," Severus sighed. "It is obviously too much for one man—or woman—to take care of seven years worth of potions classes. Besides, I think it impossible to place Horace as head of house in good conscience."
"Why I…." Horace's eyes narrowed.
"Horace, sit down and drink your mead." Severus crossed his arms. "As you can see from the current faculty seating arrangements, we have joining us two wonderful women who will help with several missing faculty appointments. Narcissa…" The blonde stood, waving. "Narcissa Malfoy has gladly taken the position of advanced potions professor and head of Slytherin."
"And what about LeStrange?" Neville asked, glaring.
"She is taking the position of Muggle Studies professor, as sadly our previous professor passed away over the summer."
"Oh so conveniently," Justin Finch-Flecthley mumbled.
"Enough," the headmaster helped up his hands, calling for silence. "I know change is difficult. However, we all knew this would be coming. We had a full two months to consider the ramifications of the sudden loss of Headmaster Dumbledore. We as a faculty have done the best with what we have in front of us. Please, take a moment to remember him and then you may begin your meal." He bowed his head. "Welcome back to Hogwarts."
CHAPTER ENDS
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