Talking has always been his greatest forte, something he could use to his advantage anytime. Just string a few words cooked by his brain and there you go. Whoever the listener maybe, his mouth always managed to find a way to turn the tables to his advantage.
But sometimes, his running mouth also got him in problems; troubles and embarrassing situations he would rather not recall.
So it was an irony that at the moment his brain has decided to freeze and his tongue was tied.
Fed up with his fidgeting and jittery behaviour, Jiang Cheng had taken the matters in his own hands- i.e. dumping him in Lan Zhan's room and telling him that he could 'either suck it up and talk like an adult or I won't let you two out'. Wei Wuxian had thought that maybe Lan Zhan's sister would help him. Sadly, even Lan Zhanshi had conspired with him.
The betrayal! Lan Zhan shared the sentiment because he had glared at his tangjie like she took his bunnies away.
♤
******♤
Now, Wei Wuxian looked around the room, anywhere but at the person sitting on the bed. The silence was getting awkward but neither made a move to disperse it.
What should they talk about? Where do they start? Who should break the silence? What should Wei Wuxian tell Lan Zhan and what not?
The questions never seem to cease in his mind and yes, Wei Wuxian was hyperventilating, internally.
Thank you for asking. He has been having quite a lot of internal crisis lately, no thanks to power hungry and stupid people.
"Wei Ying" at once, Wei Wuxian turned towards Lan Wangji, whipping around so fast he was surprised he didn't get a whiplash. It was shocking really for the latter to break the silence.
For all Wei Wuxian knew, Lan Wangji could live in silence for years.
"Wei Ying, say something."
The Second Jade had his eyes stubbornly set on the bed, like he didn't want to look at him.
Good for him, Wei Ying thought bitterly. I don't want to look at you either.
He didn't know whether he could handle those almond eyes and that voice at the same time right now.
Even without gazing into those pools of gold it was hard enough to resist the temptation which has been nagging at him for sometime. He doesn't want to spook Lan Zhan.
"Lan Zhan...." Clenching his hands in fists in his lap, Wei Wuxian looked at the hunched figure.
What was usually strong and perfect posture was now a slouched, leaning back resting against the bed; something he was sure Lan Wangji had probably never done in his life.
His hair is swept back completely today, Lan Zhanshi has put it in a simple loose braid so it won't bother him and Wei Wuxian can't help but stare. His hand itches to touch, to weave flowers in those braided strands but he taps down the urge.
There are things to be discussed, the whole plot against Lan Zhan they need to talk about.
But he doesn't want to. Wei Wuxian tries, he really does, but each time he says 'Lan Zhan...' and then stops.
Maybe he has finally gone crazy after handling resentment all the time or perhaps his brain is just refusing to cooperate with him because it can.
He couldn't just say Lan Zhan all the time, now could he? That should be made a rule. Okay, now I am definitely thinking like a creep. What kind of rule would be that? He winced internally at the thought.
Instead, he looks at Lan Zhan. After weeks of extensive care and rest, a bit of colour is rising to his cheeks- they are not the pallid deathly white colour which Wei Wuxian had seen first.
His lips are plush and moist, pink with a touch of brown. They look plush and.....what would they feel like?
Wait. Go back brain, where the hell did that come from?
An image of the scene in Lan Wangji's room in the Koi Tower came to his mind, of a nearly bare Lan Zhan pressed against him, with his back against a wall, within Wei Ying's embrace- and the close-up look of that beautiful face.....
Wrong, wrong, wrong. No. Lock that up, keep it down, block that out. Shut that thought down brain. We are not going there. There's an important talk going on here.
Clearing his throat and blinking his eyes to clear the image which suddenly flashed in his mind, Wei Wuxian smiled, the gesture only slightly strained. But Lan Zhan seemed to have caught on that something wasn't right and great.
Wei Wuxian didn't need Lan Zhan to worry about him when he was having not so decent thoughts about the other.
Lan Zhan looks like he wants to ask but jeeps his mouth shut. Wei Wuxian desperately wants him to ask him right now. That would at least put his horny brain at work and maybe then they can talk adult stuff. Not that adult stuff.
But Lan Zhan, his dear Lan Zhan doesn't push him, waits for him to gather his thoughts and how much Wei Ying loves him.
Ah. There goes his heart.
Looks like today is the day of being betrayed by one's own body.
Jiang Cheng will look at him funny if he heard his thought right now.
Well, what's the point in denying the obvious? He knows and understands and yet, this could be anything.
But who has the urge to protect someone else and keep them safe even though the other is perfectly capable of doing it on their own?
Who has the urge to kiss those plush lips and hold that soft face and caress that long waterfall of hair, murmuring sweet nonsense and have the gesture returned ?
Who has dreams of starry nights spent nighthunting together and helping the needy while roaming the world without any care; relying on nothing but each other?
Who feels like their heart is getting pieced back together when a melody is played at night, at dawn and at any time, together?
Who has a son with someone, a place to come back to even when the whole world shuns him for forever?
A lover. A zhiji. A beloved.
And Wei Wuxian understands now, the fierce ache in his heart, in the hollow of his chest, the pull he feels towards the other, why he gravitated towards someone without even conscious thought, the constant urge to be the sole point of attention of those burning golden pools.
The realisation is not much of a sudden epiphany; as it is something he has long since buried deep inside him. A part of himself too vulnerable and broken to be of any use except by the resentment which clouded his mind, a part he had guarded fiercely- with every last sane part of him to treasure, to keep and not loose when everything else seemed lost. A feeling protected first by confusion and then denial.
But now, seeing those golden eyes stare at him the way they do and almost loosing his zhiji two times- the lock breaks in his heart: allowing the love to flood through him. It washes over him like gentle waves, a reprieving shock. The feeling settles into his bones like it has always been there, a silent tenant who now has a permanent residence.
But still, a fragment of doubt is hanging by a thread, a last attempt at self preservation.
He doesn't want to lose this last piece. He could never stand up again if Lan Zhan did not feel the same as him.
"I...what do you want to know.
Tell me Lan Zhan and I will tell you."
Lan Wangji isn't a fool. He knows when he sees Wei Ying's face twist through different expressions that he is thinking. Wei Ying is a genius but his downside is that the man simply thinks too much sometimes.
"The palace. Wei Ying, tell me what happened there." He knows there's so much more he needs to ask, ought to ask but this, this has been sitting in his mind for sometime and is the last adversary they faced. It would be better for them to start off somewhere easier.
Wei Ying sighs like he is so tired.
He seems to be contemplating something, Lan Wangji can see that.
He has that look on his face, his eyes closed like they could reveal a secret if kept open.
Is there something Wei Ying doesn't want him to know? What happened in the palace that he needs to hide from Lan Wangji?
"There's so much Lan Zhan. What do you want to know about?"
So much he needs to know, so much he needs to understand, so much he doesn't want to understand. And yet, the urge to know sits impatient inside him- a restless thing.
Perhaps he need to be specific.
He knows Wei Ying and his ability to circle around things.
'If I sit here and drink, it won't count as breaking the rules now, would it?'
"Tell me as much you would like."
Wei Ying sighs again and Lan Zhan knows he has won. Wei Ying once told him in his letters that his eyes were irresistible when focused on him, along with his lips jutted out (Wei Ying had crossed them out but after a few tries, but Lan Wangji had been able to decipher the characters and understand).
"You know I will tell you everything when you speak like that! That's dirty Lan Zhan! You cannot just do that!"
"Mn, Wei Ying knows."
"Of course I know! You horribly cute man, stop pouting or else I will pass out before speaking a word!" He made a mock choking expression, hiding his face behind his hands.
Wei Wuxian was sure his face was red.
Please don't flame, my face; don't flame.
The mood changes quickly, with Wei Ying grinning wide. Good, Wei Ying should always be happy. Lan Wangji counts it for the victory it is.
"Wei Ying is strong, he will survive." Lan Zhan, that man is a menace.
Why is Wei Wuxian only finding about it now?
"Hey! That's cheating. God Lan Zhan, do you want me to tell you or not?"
"Mn." Suddenly serious, Lan Wangji nodded. And just like that, the mood turned like a quick gust of wind, abrupt.
"Before I start, promise me that you will not blame yourself for anything."
Lan Wangji stared at the man before him-Wei Ying looked quite serious.
He had a determined but soft look on him, the one Lan Wangji remembers vaguely from his once drunken escapade.
'Lan Zhan, standing against the cultivation world, the battle of NeverNight, none of them were your fault. They were my choices alone.
You don't need to blame yourself for that. Do you understand?'
He forces himself to look straight into those silver orbs, nodding once.
Is it just him or those silver eyes look sharper than Mo Xuanyu's eyes?
Last he checked, Mo Xuanyu's eyes only had a bit of grey in them.
"Okay."
With a sigh, Wei Wuxian started explaining, recalling the events that took place. The day was going to be a long one.
♤********♤
In the end, Lan Wangji manages to coax out not only the events of the imperial palace but also the information about the nighthunt near the Yunmeng's border village and Meili.
Though the last only has few speculations and theories which Nie Huaisang managed to form based on his observations and knowledge from his people- it's still enough to give Lan Wangji the general idea of the incident.
Lies. Since the beginning, only lies.
He went to Meili to help them and instead got back stabbed, literally.
He went to the village near the borders of the Yunmeng to help them and instead got attacked and assaulted.
He went to the imperial palace to help the Royal family and instead got torture and threat to his sect.
"...Lan Zhan..." Wei Wuxian looked at his zhiji, concerned. Lan Zhan not speaking could mean many things but Lan Zhan not meeting his eyes and not speaking could mean only one thing.
"Lan Zhan, I told you not to blame yourself! You promised!"
Still, Lan Zhan wouldn't look at him. Wei Ying noticed him clutching the cover too hard, his knuckles almost white with the veins visible given the amount of force he was exerting. Finally, after a long silence, Lan Wangji spoke:
"Wei Ying, do you blame yourself for anything that happened?"
Wei Wuxian startled, blinking repeatedly and trying to grasp the words. Lan Zhan did not just ask him that.
"Uh...Lan Zhan, I think I misheard you-"
"Do you blame yourself?" Wei Wuxian stared at him, Lan Wangji has just broken a rule and did not seem to care about that. He had turned towards Wei Wuxian now and was looking serious about his question.
"Tell me Wei Ying, do you or do you not?"
They stared at each other for sometime, not speaking, simply looking.
Then looking straight at him with a hard gaze, Wei Wuxian spoke:
"I do."
"Then you know my answer."
At this, Wei Wuxian stood up from his place near Lan Wangji's foot on the bed, going near the lone window in the room. They didn't have many windows here in the healer's pavillion, a precaution and a reprieve.
Frustration has been a good emotion for him, Wei Ying doesn't like being frustrated. It makes him want to scratch something, to do something- anything which would expel the extra energy in him rather than do harm.
"Lan Zhan! Your situation is completely different than mine! You couldn't do anything for heaven's sake while I?
I could have-"
"No." Wei Wuxian gazed at the person sitting on the bed in confused anger. This was the second time Lan Wangji had interrupted him.
"You couldn't have prevented this even if you tried Wei Ying."
"You do not know that." If Wei Wuxian's voice was steadier than he felt at the moment, if he stared at Lan Zhan like the latter was behaving similar to a child, feeling ridiculous at even needing to voice the words- no one had to know.
"I know enough." Wei Wuxian huffed, turning away.
"Do you really know Lan Zhan?"
His voice was low, eerily so.
The temperature in the room may have gone down a bit. Lan Wangji shot his eyes towards the other, noticing the sudden change in atmosphere.
"Wei Ying"
Wei Wuxian turned, his eyes still that confusing grey but instead of the usual carefree look, he looked grim and maybe a bit tense.
Without saying anything, Wei Wuxian strode towards the bed sitting near the head of the bed and before Lan Wangji could say anything, maybe question what was going on; he found his centre of gravity being tilted- as arms wrapped around his shoulder, bracketing his upper body totally and his face was mushed against a tan column of skin.
Long hair tickled his breath, the smell of a bit of some fragrant oil along with an undercurrent of something which was mellow and oh so addicting.
It was summer and the sweltering heat of Yunmeng could very well melt Lan Wangji- someone who had spent his entire life in the mountains of Gusu.
Without a core to maintain his body temperature, it was like being battling near the sun.
He remembers the heat from NeverNight, the heat rolling off the lava pools surrounding the whole inner territory; he had his core back then and yet the heat was barely manageable.
Currently, Wei Ying was rubbing his face in his hair and Lan Wangji suddenly wanted to push him away.
He hadn't taken a proper bath in days and even today's try had resulted in an embarrassing moment. He doesn't want Wei Ying to smell that pungent smell on him.
"Wei Ying" Sadly, his voice was muffled due to his current position.
Suddenly hot with mortification, Lan Wangji tried to push himself up but Wei Ying simply made a noise entirely foreign to humans and held him tighter. What was more humiliating was that Lan Wangji felt himself almost melting in the embrace, his body liquid in the warm and tight hold.
He tried once again, unsuccessfully, his body totally uncooperative: meeting with the same result. Just then, a hot breath fanned his ears and Lan Wangji could practically feel it when Wei Ying spoke next, each syllable vibrating between their pressed bodies.
"Stay still Lan Zhan....you think you know enough but I am telling you Lan Zhan, you were not there to watch what happened.
You think you are to blame just because you were targeted? You ask why I blame myself? I blame myself Lan Zhan because I know I was responsible.
It's...It's because of me that you suffered, it's because of me that you had to go through so much. And for what? Just so some fool could have me as their ally? That's absurd Lan Zhan, you shouldn't have to be hurt just because other people think they can have my favour if they present you to me. That prince, he...he was nuts Lan Zhan, nuts! The whole royal family was nuts! You would think that being the ruler of such a huge kingdom would put some sense in people but....huh. After seeing and hearing what I did there....forgive me Lan Zhan, but I don't think I will ever get over that guilt.
I can't Lan Zhan, I can't."
Images surfaced in front of his eyes- Lan Zhan tied to the wooden pillar, unconscious, with blood on his robes, oh so weak without the strength of his core; Lan Zhan lying in the tent, almost naked, curled in on himself because of shame, tears flowing from his eyes; Lan Zhan lying in bed, writhing in pain, screaming for help, calling for him and not knowing that Wei Ying was just there, right beside him, clutching his hand and crying, praying to every divine being for their help; Lan Zhan not responding to anything, lying still like a statue; Lan Zhan in the room of Koi Tower, right out of the bath and only in his innermost robes, pressed against him, still ashamed at being indecent; Lan Zhan in the Discussion Hall of Koi Tower, right in front of him and yet so far away.
The hold around him tightens and Lan Wangji feels a bit suffocated; still he endures it for Wei Ying needs comfort and if he finds it in holding Lan Wangji as tight as he is holding, then so be it. And if Lan Wangji suffers just a bit, his back itching and muscles protesting a tinee tiny bit......well, it's worth it.
♤*********♤
Somehow, they fell asleep like that and are woken up rudely (in Lan Wangji's humble opinion) by his dear tangjie, Lan Zhanshi.
She is poking his cheeks (heaven knows what delight it gives her and everyone else in playing with his cheeks, but Lan Wangji endures the torture most of the time; only by her and Wei Ying though) and has a smile which Lan Wangji would rather not think about.
You see, if Lan Zhanshi wasn't a Lan by birth, Lan Wangji is absolutely sure her smile would be called evil.
As is his fate, she is a Lan and so her smile is what one would call a tame version of a dangerous smile, the smile of an elder sibling who wants details.
Just then, feeling the press of something soft on his head, Lan Wangji came to realise his position. He was trapped, in Wei Ying's arms, who was using his him as some sort of a human pillow.
In his sleep, Wei Ying has unconsciously kissed him, kissed him!
Cautiously, Lan Wangji moved his eyes towards the yet sleeping figure, ignoring his sister in favour of looking at Wei Ying. Wrong choice.
Their faces were close, so close each breath Wei Ying took fanned across his, tickling his ears- his ears which are burning at the moment for sure.
"Uhm..hmm." Nope, Lan Wangji refused to look towards her and be subjected to what he knew would be a very mortifying ordeal.
He finally has to look, if only to plead for help silently because his body is starting to protest from the heat and Wei Ying needs to wake up anyway. After being subjected to enough mortification to last a lifetime, Lan Zhanshi let's them go.
Wei Ying blushes as soon as he wakes up, acutely aware of their position before stuttering a string of apologies and hightailing out of the room.
The Lan siblings blink at the sudden departure, before Lan Zhanshi laughs. She grins towards her dear cousin who simply chooses to ignore her for the rest of the evening.
********
Something thaws between them after that. Since Lan Wangji is much recovered now, Lan Zhanshi assigns Wei Wuxian the task of walking her cousin around the pier- claiming he needs to work his muscles gradually 'under the guidance of someone'.
Lan Wangji glares at her for a solid ten minutes before he agrees.
Oh, she knows what she is doing.
Meanwhile Wei Wuxian, oblivious to the siblings' war and Lan Zhanshi's conspiracy, is more than happy to help. He shows Lan Zhan around, chattering away about everything and anything they come across. They start small, just a step outside the room first but soon Lan Wangji can walk to till the last corridors leading to the practicing grounds without any fatigue.
Sometimes, they sit on the pavillion between the waters at sunset, enjoying the silence as the last of the practising disciples shout out the formations and farewell, the clanking of metal and swoosh of arrows against flying kites presenting a scenic background to fall under.
And fall they did. Each day, each moment together, away from prying eyes was a reprieve needed but not asked for, in fears neither liked to think of. Simply being in the bubble, existing without any worry or care; even if they knew that sooner or later they will have to talk, will have to face the world outside their safe bubble.
Both Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji try to stall it for as long as they can. A brush of fingers there, a hand on shoulder there, 'so you don't fall Lan Zhan', leaning against each other with arms wrapped around him here; it all happens like it's second nature- as if they have been doing this for all their life, and yet. And yet they never speak of it.
Then one day, when the sun is bidding goodnight to everyone, as Wei Ying steers them back towards the room, Lan Wangji notices how they are going towards the west side and not the south, the direction in which the healer's pavillion lies. He doesn't question it at first, wondering if Wei Ying wants to show him something.
He does that often, showing Lan Wangji something which has memories of Wei Ying's childhood- spent in the same spot where once the previous grand structure stood.
The current Lotus Pier is magnificent in itself, tastefully decorated with an architecture style made to withstand any future onslaught while preserving the original structure; a complete replica. It's majestic and similar to the point each nook and cranny has been made from the scratch exactly like it was before the war, as Wei Ying claimed.
'You won't believe me Lan Zhan but Jiang Cheng even had them build the tarnished carvings and bent wooden pillar in the lone corner of the pier!'
They reach a quite area, a place so full of solace Lan Wangji finds himself relaxing immediately. It's tranquil in a way few places are in Lotus Pier; the whole residence screaming loud at first glance.
Here, a single bird is singing on a tree, teaching here babies the melody she has perhaps sung her whole life while a gentle breeze eases the dull heat- making trees sway with the silent beat. They make their way to the open porch overlooking the swirling dock-like structure leading to the pavillion in the centre of the lake. They sit in silence for a while, Wei Wuxian looking at the lake and Lan Wangji at the pavillion.
The area has a feel about it and with the way Wei Ying is behaving Lan Wangji knows this place is special to him.
"Lan Zhan"
"Mn?" Keeping his eyes straight on the lake, Wei Wuxian asked:
"What's the real meaning of your sacred ribbon? I know you must have told me many times but....I need to hear it, once more."
There's something in his voice, a seriousness the other rarely has that makes Lan Wangji turn to him.
"How many times did you copy the rules Wei Ying?"
A huff of laugh, as if the answer was expected and then Wei Ying is shaking his head.
"Ah. So many times that you probably thought I was getting in trouble for purpose. You were actually disappointed when I finished writing them though. Huh, once I was writing the rules like my hand would fall off and now I remember most of them whenever a Lan junior breaks one.
But Lan Zhan...."
"Mn."
"You know that I don't have a core, I am but an ordinary man." He did not turn to look at whatever was there on Lan Zhan's face for it would surely crumble his resolve.
"Wei Ying.." Wei Wuxian turned, facing Lan Wangji but still keeping his eyes on their hands.
"You know I will probably never be able to cultivate like a normal cultivator. I also don't have my own body."
"Doesn't matter" Lan Wangji said firmly. He knew sometimes Wei Ying despised his new body.
He didn't despise Mo Xuanyu but the fact that Mo Xuanyu's body was so weak Wei Ying often felt useless when faced with something. He was a free person, independent from the start and having to rely on others always annoyed him. Also, Mo Xuanyu's body has a really weak immune and healing system so whenever Wei Ying gets hurt he has to be on bed for days before he could risk going anywhere.
Wei Wuxian blinked back tears, hanging his head low as he rubbed those pale hands in between his.
Their hands fit so perfectly.
He wants to hold them forever.
"But you could..."
"Wei Ying. I do not care about whether you can never cultivate with a golden core, nor if you do not have your body. Wei Ying is Wei Ying."
"Lan Zhan..." Lan Wangji can feel it, the deep brand on Wei Ying's mind acting up, the one which was probably beaten into him by Madam Yu, that everyone else deserved the best.
That Wei Ying was not worth it, that he should forever be grateful to them for having so much. Wei Ying is a selfless person, so much that it's self-destructive.
"Why do you think I searched for sixteen years Wei Ying?" this time, Lan Wangji's voice was small, like he didn't want to talk about it but had to.
Wei Ying himself felt like crying, this was torture.
"You..."
"You are my zhiji Wei Ying.
I do not care if you do not look the same, if you cannot cultivate the same. It's your soul Wei Ying."
"Lan Zhan, you would throw away a chance to be with someone worthy of your reputation to be with a demon..."
"Wei Ying is not a demon.
Wei Ying is the only one of my level. You are still the same Wei Ying who always looks out for others, cares for other, even at the cost of your own life. I do not need anything Wei Ying, just you are enough."
He said each word while looking straight into those red rimmed eyes which shone bright when Wei Ying laughed, which turned red when Wei Ying was angry.
This time when Lan Wangji was wrapped in those arms, wet laughter ringing pleasantly in his ears, he was ready. He was ready, happy and crying. They both were.
"Lan Zhan ah Lan Zhan! You really get going once you start. My zhiji, my airen. You stupid fuddy buddy."
"Wei Ying is a fool. He asked if I wanted to marry someone else not Wei Ying."
Wei Ying laughs, the sound loud and rough and lovely. While he laughs, he makes them both stand, swaying together.
"Lan Zhan....I have something I want to show you...."
Confused, Lan Wangji let's him go, albeit reluctantly. He wants to be in Wei Ying's arms right now, not away from him. It must show on his face because Wei Ying snickers before patting himself all round muttering 'Argh...stupid talisman...where did it go...'
"Uh...Lan Zhan, can you close your eyes for a second?" Suspicious about what's happening he looks at Wei Ying's nervous smile before nodding.
When Lan Wangji complies, he hears a bit of rustling and then someone taps his forehead. Frowning, he opens his eyes, only to blink and widen them.
Not believing, he blinks some more but the image in front of him doesn't disappear in smoke nor does Wei Ying laughs with a cheeky 'got you!'.
There, in front him, in all his glory is Wei Ying....in a different build.
He is more beautiful, glowing.
He is taller, his features sharper but those phoenix eyes and those silver irises...Lan Wangji would recognise them anywhere.
"Wei....Ying..." his voice comes out hoarse, thick with overwhelming emotion. Unconsciously, he takes a step towards that perfect illusion, surely another dream. A trembling hand reaches up to check for himself, to ground himself with a feel that it's real. When his hand comes in contact with soft skin, Wei Ying's eyes following his movements while another hand envelops his own- Lan Wangji finally breaks down.
He cannot believe this. Wei Ying's face contorted in worry and before Lan Wangji knows what's happening, a warm hand reaches up, a thumb brushing away a tear.
He hadn't even noticed the tears escaping....
"Lan Zhan...what's wrong?"
Without waiting for a response, Wei Ying brought him closer, inspecting him. Tucked in the space between his shoulder and arms, Lan Wangji shuddered. He shook his head, trying to speak but his voice came out muffled. Sensing this, Wei Ying brought his face in front of him, making a questioning noise.
"Happy tears, these are tears of happiness." Lan Wangji repeated.
Wei Ying relaxed immediately, still the thumb on his cheeks didn't go.
This body, which Lan Wangji could only assume to be Wei Ying's body aged up a bit, has callousness in all the right parts it seems. The thumb rubbing away the tears has a rough texture to it- a reminder that the hand belongs to a cultivator, a reminder that the hand belongs to Wei Ying who has probably used his thumb to draw blood multiple times for talismans in his first life.
Lan Wangji couldn't have stopped the smile which took over him.
Wei Ying seemed hyper-focused on his task of wiping off all the tears but he soon saw his smile and oh.
Lan Wangji had never known he would see the same smile on that face again.
He had once broken down in Jingshi because he couldn't remember that same smile, Wei Ying's face just a memory which was fading with time.
With no painting to remember him by, Lan Wangji had found solace in A-Yuan's smile, the boy laughing with a bunny in the field.
That day, he had thought 'Even if I can never hope to repent and remember you the way I did back, I hope your soul can rest well knowing the child you called your own has a place to thrive. I hope you can never forgive me Wei Ying, for my penitence will never thaws with time.'
Now faced with that same smile, Lan Wangji is entranced. It's breath-taking.
Then, as if he cannot help himself, Wei Ying rubs his nose against his cheeks, looking up onto his forehead.
No, Lan Wangji realises Wei Ying is looking at his forehead ribbon only when a feather light kiss drops on the metal. He is overflowing with emotions, his eyelashes are wet again but no one can blame him. His zhiji, his soulmate, his Wei Ying knows the meaning of the sacred ribbon and kissed it!
This time when they fall into each other's arms, Lan Wangji let's himself bask in the feeling it settles deep inside him, the way everything feels lighter, a hollow filled up. It's everything he has ever dreamed of and everything he has ruthlessly tried to lock away when everything went downhill and then away. When Wei Ying went away.
They clutch at eachother like a lifeline, like they can't get enough if it.
Wei Wuxian smiles through tears, never in his two lifetimes had he dared to hope he could have this....this, Lan Zhan in his arms, cocooned in his embrace, happy, willing to be with him.
It still feels like a dream, a cruel dream which will shatter as soon as he wakes up. Maybe Lan Zhan thinks the same if his grip is anything to go by.
There are whispers of sweet nothings, Wei Ying teasing and blubbering everything which comes to his brilliant mind, directly into Lan Wangji's red ears. But there's a smile on that usually blank face and so for once, Wei Ying doesn't stop.
Not when Lan Zhan calls him half-heartedly to stop teasing, not when the red on those ears blooms and travels down to that pale neck.
Wei Ying delights in discovering till where he can make Lan Zhan blush.
He gets a 'shameless' for that but also a smile so he counts it as victory.
There are whispers of promises held within, words held back before now spoken freely.
There are whispers of 'wǒ ài nǐ'. There are whispers of 'I love you'.
Eventually, Wei Ying tells Lan Zhan about the recovered golden core too and Lan Wangji breaks down the second time that day when he puts his hand near Wei Ying's lower dantian and feels the energy thrum under his fingers. He cannot feel much without his core but Wei Ying already has a talisman for it, something which helps him absurd the surroundings' qi and feel the other person's energy.
'So you can feel the energy Lan Zhan!'
He also tells him about the area belonging to his shijie and they spend the evening like that, holding onto eachother, leaning against eachother, looking at the pavillion in between the lake.
Shijie, I am home now.
***********
我愛你Wǒ ài nǐ : I love you
Do tell me if the chapter was okay because it's my first time writing such a setting and I want to know if I did it justice!
Vote and comment to tell me your thoughts!
Also, this is more than 5k long. I hope I didn't bore anyone?
Science: No displacement= zero work done= no energy usage
Me( siting at my desk and creating a document for 10 hours without break): Am I a joke to you? 🤨
Ignore after this:
I know people say that pandemic is over and blahblahblah....but one thing is common: we all lost something, we need a break, some time to adjust, even now.
Why can't some people understand? Like, I am a human okay!? Not your walking ATM from whom you can take out money whenever you want.
My apologies dear readers but if you receive too many rants or announcements from me then please don't hesitate to either ignore or unfollow me. I am stressed and just need to rant somewhere, in any form.
Once again, apologies.
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Written: 24 April, 2022 - 2May, 2022
Last edited: 2 May, 2022