When I loved you, I loved the city that you lived in. I loved the spelling of your name, your voice, your laughter and everything related to you. When I loved you, I loved the city that you live in. I loved you and everything about you.
— Samir Giad
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Him
He races his horse with Taha at the borders of the lake and the sound of waterfall grows louder with every beat of the hooves against the desert rocks. He steers his horse away from the lakeside and glances behind him to find Taha hot on his heels. He's sure if he blinks, his general might overpass him.
"Ha!"
He nudges his horse and tightens his grip on the spear in his hand. The waterfall becomes visible in the distance. The hot winds tugs at the hair tied at his nape and a few strands poke his eyes. He jerks his head.
Taha begins to catch up with him. He can see him from his peripheral view. But with one final tug of the reins, his horse gallops toward the finishing line and he buries his spear in the ground. The horses come to a stop and he turns towards his general who smiles at him.
"I once took pride in being your best horseman. Am I growing old or are you growing younger, my Ameer?"
"Maybe I'm growing older, general." He laughs.
Her
The sword swishes past her left and right and above her head with her dodging it by bare inches. She swirls and ducks and turns to counterattack but he doesn't give her a chance. Her breath leaves her in pants and exhaustion weighs on her bones but she cannot give up against him. An nth loss to her list, she needs to defeat him this time.
He swings his blade and she twirls out of range to roll behind him. She leaps at the opening but he's swift to catch her wrist that flies a dagger towards him. Briskly he rids of her dagger with the flick of his own wrist. He jerks her to himself and she grasps tightly the sword held in her free hand. But he's deft to deal with her before her blade can find him in offense.
As the last clang of the metal meets her ears upon their swords colliding, she looses grip on her weapon and he strikes it out of her hand. Any attempt to lunge for it fails when he darts towards her and grabs her arm, pulling her so her back crashes into his chest. He raises his sword across her length, the sharp edge of it coming to rest against her jaw.
"Surrender," he demands in a whisper.
She inhales sharply and stills, the moment suspending in time, as she focuses on finding an escape towards her victory. He presses the metal to her cheek and hums, his voice laced with both delight and playfulness when he speaks.
"The outcomes of our duels are becoming too predictable."
"You don't seem to enjoy it."
"It lacks thrill."
"Is it pride I hear, my lord?" she mocks.
She doesn't give him an opportunity to respond as she hooks her leg into his knee and buckles it. He looses his balance and she tackles him backwards. He falls to the ground and the sword slips from his fingers. She's quick to kick it out of his reach and springs at him. Unsheathing her spare dagger, she straddles him and puts it to his throat.
"Surrender," she commands.
"Playing dirty, aren't we?"
"For the sake of the thrill you crave." She smirks and traces his jugular vein with the tip of the dagger. "I never surrendered so the duel was still on."
He smirks back at her. It is only a flicker of the glow in his twilight-kissed orbs before he clasps her waist. Her eyes widen in shock and before she could react, he switches their position. In one abrupt movement, she's on the ground and he hovers above her. He locks her hands over her head and snatches the dagger from her hand so now it presses to her own throat.
"What do you say, is this a good end to our duel?"
"Sly," she hisses.
He only laughs in reply to her remark. "Do you surrender now?"
She sighs and gives up. Someday, another day, she will defeat him in the duel. Maybe that day is not today.
But he's a soldier trained in the battlefields. And he's training her hard and tough. Whether she wins against him or not, he's not compromising on her defense by giving her temporary joy over him faking a loss. There's no going easy on each other despite the limits they've to observe.
He pushes himself off her and stands up. In contrast to her, he doesn't appear as tired. She sits up and he offers her his hand. She shakes her head at him.
"Let me catch my breath."
He goes to pick his sword and sheaths it, then picks her weapons and brings them to her along with a bottle of water. He hands it to her and she drinks from it gladly. He settles beside her on the grass.
The light is close to dissolving into dark. The sky is dusky with hues of orange and gold before the streaks of clouds blend it into a deeper blue. The sun is only a distant shadow soon to sink into the horizon. He stares at it, slowly appearing to blend into his thoughts. The breeze blows and brings the strands of his hair to graze his forehead. She looks away down to ground, threading her fingers into the grass as her own musings take her into an embrace. She hugs her knees to herself and rest her chin upon them. They probably have the same thing on their minds.
Azar stands under a tree waiting for them. He appears restless unlike his master who's carefree sitting here with her. But they need to get home before the night falls. No matter the strength or skills of these men, she knows her mother will not stop worrying for them. Especially not since the incident which changed her life. It still feels like yesterday to her.
But she intends on talking to him before they return to their house. There has been an important issue which he has been avoiding for long. And though it may be fair for him, she assumes he still might need time, but she needs an answer at least to be assured. Laleh has tied her hopes to him. For her she needs to know what he thinks.
"Maman wrote to you a letter before you came home," she mentions subtly as she starts the conversation. She knows he's not in denial or oblivion, just not willing into admittance, but she cannot allow him to delay the affair any longer.
He gives her a look of innocent confusion and tilts his head. She returns it with a warning one.
"Several letters actually, about a certain matter," she adds. "Don't feign ignorance, Eskander."
He combs his fingers through his hair and pushes back the strands from his eyes. But his effort is futile as the breeze brings it forth again.
"She did," he affirms, but doesn't add more.
"So, what did you think about it?"
"Nothing."
She frowns in disapproval at his response. "Nothing?"
"I had things to deal with at the palace. I didn't get time to think about it."
"Then think about it now," she insists, feeling upset with him. "Unless there's someone else--"
"There's no one," he cuts her calmly, turning towards her. "I just don't find it to be the right time. That is all."
"If you leave it to your duty, maybe it will never permit you."
"Maybe it suits me," he dismisses.
"Eskander--"
"Nour," he shushes her, requesting, "let it go."
"Dayi (uncle) likes you for his daughter," she explains. "They're family. He's maman's brother. Maman wants so too."
"She asked you to talk to me?"
"No. She mentioned it, told me that you hadn't given her any response regarding it, neither to the letters nor in person. I thought of it myself to talk to you about it."
"Well there's nothing to talk about. Laleh will find someone better than me," he slides it easily.
"But she like you," Noura tells him honestly, finding his expression changing. "She doesn't want someone better. She wants you."
"She said that to you?" he inquires with an arched eyebrow.
"Yes." She edges closer, urging him. "Look, she has proposals from other families. Dayi asked maman to speak to you about it. If you're willing, they'll say no to them and not keep them waiting."
"I don't look at her that way, Nour. Tell dayi not to make Laleh sit in hopes of my name. Find another suitable match for her."
"And you'll die alone?"
"I'll marry when it's time, to whoever else maman likes for me."
"But what is wrong with Laleh?"
"Nothing. She's great. But I told you, I've never looked at her that way."
"Then do so now."
He chuckles at her dismissively and it only makes her blood boil. He gets to his feet and gestures for her to follow him.
"Come, we're getting late."
"Don't escape the conversation," she scolds, standing up too. "This is serious. The girl likes you. If there's no one else in your heart, what is the problem with you considering her? She's beautiful, she's sweet, and she's family. Laleh is honorable in every way."
"But I'm not honorable. That is the problem."
She looks at him dumbfounded, and he turns his back to her as he starts walking down the hill.
"Azar! Bring our things," he calls out to his guard who hurries after them.
She watches him undo their horses and load their things. He appears totally undeterred by their discussion. Fisting her hands in annoyance, Noura chases after him.
"Eskander." She grabs his elbow and turns him to face her. "You need to let go of the past. How long will you beat yourself about it if you've rectified your affairs?"
He pinches the bridge of his nose and closes his eyes. Noura can see frustration pulling terse his features. "I'm bound to the crown. It is still too much of a mess for me to drag another person with me into it."
"Is it about amira Maysoon--"
"No, for God's sake." He tugs forward the horse, lines of displeasure forming on his forehead. "Get on it. We're not discussing it anymore."
"You're not telling me the truth." She glares at him. "Is she still after you?"
"Nour." He exhales, pulling his lip between his teeth as he tries to keep his cool. "Did you tell anyone the truth?"
She feels as if slapped by his words. She feels as if stabbed. Noura stares at him, flabbergasted once more, unable to form any coherent thoughts or sentence in reply. He has stepped on her raw nerve and she can feel the ache everywhere in her body. She works her jaw as she grits at him.
"I thought we were over it, Eskander?"
He huffs out a laugh in disdain. "I cannot un-hate that man any less for fooling you into a marriage despite my warnings."
"I'm sure he reciprocates your hatred equally if not more," she spits, shaking in rage. "And my love for him doesn't bound you to bend to him. You do as you please anyway."
"You call it love when it's been a year and a half since he disappeared on you?" He scoffs in disbelief, and her heart burns at his taunt. "He's not imprisoned, Nour. He isn't in exile either to not be able to come to you. He's ruling his own region. He has freedom. Yet he chose to stay away. No visit. No letter. I ask you why?"
"This is between him and I," she defends. "He'll return soon."
"Oh I wish." He turns away from her and tugs his horse. "I'll marry Laleh if she can wait for me another fifty years. I'm in no position to be taking a wife yet. There are other responsibilities I must fulfill first. Because I don't want to leave her midway when things turn ugly, like a certain someone."
She hears the scorn in his words, another arrow embedded in her heart. Her tolerance shakes and she wants to scream at him, to fight him-- to cry. But she has nothing more against him in her defense.
"Because you've already once experienced leaving someone midway and it still stings?"
His body goes rigid at her snide remark. She bites her tongue, but there's no taking back of what is already said. He doesn't cast her another glance and mounts his horse.
"Yes. Now get on the horse," he asks her again.
It takes her a moment to come out of the shock of the situation. She mounts her horse. They snap the reins and set off for their house.
When they reach their home, she finds Laleh there too who receives them at the door with a smile.
"Khosh amedid (welcome)."
"Thank you." She smiles back while Eskander only nods in acknowledgement before walking past her inside. Laleh looks after him before giving her a troubled expression.
"Amme (aunt) insisted that I stay for the dinner," she tells her quietly as they make their way inside too. "Eskander looks upset. Did something happen?"
"We had an argument."
"About me?" she asks anxiously, stopping to face her. "Did you tell him?"
"It's something else," Noura denies, unable to find it in herself to hurt her feelings. For she knows the pain too well. She doesn't want her to go through the same.
"You can tell me the truth, Nour. I can take it. Did he reject the proposal--"
"No, of course not. I couldn't get to discuss it with him. It was getting late and we had to leave," she lies. "Don't worry yourself, Laleh. I'll ask him about it at an appropriate time."
"He doesn't like me, does he?" Laleh smiles ruefully and glances away. "Is there someone else at the palace? There must be. A woman more beautiful than I to him. He must be desired a lot."
"Were it the case, wouldn't he have married by now?" Noura reasons with her gently. "No one at the palace can be beautiful as you, Laleh, and Eskander knows it too."
This makes the smile on Laleh's face bloom into a grin. She gives her a grateful look, squeezing her hand before excusing herself. "Let me help amme in the kitchen."
Noura nods and watches her go before making her way to the veranda outside where she finds Roya, her maid and her guard, waiting for her. She approaches her upon seeing her and tips her head in a greeting.
"Noura khanum (lady), how did your training with Eskander agha (sir) go?"
She leans against one of the pillars and turns to Roya. "The usual."
Roya peers around carefully, making sure they're not heard before telling her, "Your husband sent a messenger, khanum."
She breathes deeply and folds her arms, not surprised by the news. This isn't the first time after all. And she knows like every time, there will still be little effort from his side to connect with her.
Yet still, she asks Roya, holding onto the frail hope that she might hear something from him. "Any letter?"
"No, khanum," the expected reply comes, shattering that hope. "Only gold for your expanses and some gifts. I returned them, as you had asked me to."
"Good," she mutters in dismay. "Did anyone else learn of it?"
"No, I met the messenger outside. No one suspected a thing."
"Make sure no one ever knows of it. Especially not maman or Eskander."
"As you please, khanum. But how long will you keep the secret? Eventually they'll find out," Roya voices her concern. "Shahzade (prince) Adam is your husband. Your family thinks he has abandoned you, but they don't know it is you who has been denying his provisions for you."
"My mother wrote him many letters, asking him to either take me with him honorably or end the marriage like a man, but to not leave me helpless like this where I cannot go back neither move on. He never once replied to them, and left me and maman answerable to everyone," she argues brokenheartedly. "Noura Al Makhzum was forcefully taken from her home and beguiled into marrying the caliph of his time. Then the caliph loses his throne and abandons his wife. There's no lie in that, Roya. And if someone questions me about it, or about him, I can give them nothing more than my silence. That is how lonely he has left me."
Her maid gives her a sardonic look, but there's no pity in there, for she too knows though she's suffering in hiding, she has only become stronger than crumbling.
"But my lady, how long will it go on?"
"Until the prince realizes what I want from him is beyond the price he has set, let him be lost to my family, and I'll be lost to him."
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Missed me? Missed you <3
So we return, and I welcome you back, as the story continues. What are your thoughts?
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