He didn't realize he was out of the dream just yet. At least, that was what Soundwave ardently wished for. Although he knew it was foolishly futile, and that he was lying to himself, he wanted to wholly believe that he hadn't returned still. It was like the flip of a switch that turns off a light in a pitch dark room, yet the brightness would linger in the space for a few seconds longer despite its source of power being withdrawn--quickly fading and decaying until it was finally enveloped into the surrounding blackness, lost in a soundless void. His light, his hope that relied upon his vehement denial of the proof that laid itself plainly in from of him, was no more. It was extinguished, no matter what Soundwave tried to make up in his mind.
His headache was gone, and everything suddenly clicked into place like an ugly puzzle. Soundwave couldn't brush off the truth anymore--not now. All the events were so clear in his mind, and he knew that everything he'd witnessed was real, despite what he so desperately wanted to disprove.
His memories were repaired.
Ravage noticed his master stir from his sudden coma, transparently shaken by what the mini-con inferred to have been induced by the now colorless and dull cube, and rushed over to him.
"Master, what happened?" Ravage tried to urge a response from him as the Communications Chief slowly sat upright, simultaneously pressing the side of their helm to reveal their previously retracted visor and conceal their faceplate. Nothing was said in response. Ravage waited a little longer before he hesitantly tried again.
"Master..?"
Soundwave would yet to answer once more, still collecting all of his thoughts inside his mind. Soundwave knew now why it was so effortless for him to strike Airachnid down when she tried taking over the ship. His gladiator senses were still there, buried deep within his subconcious, despite his erased knowledge of them.
And Megatron, forcefully picturing himself as Soundwave's savior in their warped memories from the psycube. Calling and proclaiming their relationship to be friends as Soundwave lay dying from the very wounds Megatron inflicted upon him.
Ha.
Soundwave wandered through the Nemesis with an empty gaze filling his optics, all but broken and alone as he slowly stalked the halls like an undead vessel.
"Master, please. Tell me what is troubling you," Ravage tried to get through to him, worry etched in his voice. But, it was all in vain. Soundwave could not hear him, nor anything from the outside. He was lost in his own heavy daze, a sickening one - the kind that makes one numb to all things else around oneself. Megatron, whom Soundwave had committed and dedicated every circuit of his being to, the leader and creator of the Decepticon cause that he so whole-heartedly believed in; was in fact the source of his unbearable grief, agony, and silence.
Soundwave thought he knew everything, always. There were never secrets witheld from Soundwave. Only for him to realize that he'd been living a lie for over a millennia.
There were so many overwhelming emotions contained within him, yet he could not express any of them to anyone. No one could know he regained his past memories. They were altered for a reason - to keep his loyalty, and garner hatred for their mortal enemy, the Autobots. Soundwave wanted to slit Megatron's throat right where he stood, and then crush his spark with his bare servos. And Shockwave... Shockwave...
. . .
"Soundwave...are you online?"
Soundwave held his throbbing helm as he regained conciousness, feeling as if he'd been run over by the alterate mode of Optimus twice over. Soundwave lifted his view up, taking a few astroseconds to focus his optics, and recognized the vibrant indigo painted scientist that asked of him. He tried to speak out in reply, but quickly winced and touched his cables. Shockwave stilled.
"..You may disregard my previous question. It seems as though the procedure was a success, as you are indeed online." Shockwave shifted to face a console and typed quickly a slur of cybertronian symbols into its system. After about a klik or so though, Shockwave stiffened and turned back, noticing he'd left Soundwave in the dark without any sort of explanation to his situation.
"Ahem. Soundwave. You were crtitically injured, and I tended to your recovery. I believe as time continues you will quickly be brought up to speed. Now, I must ask a few simple questions before I may discharge you from this place." Shockwave elucidated bluntly. Soundwave paused for a moment before nodding.
"Have you ever defected from the Decepticon cause?"
Soundwave looked at Shockwave completely appalled by the question.
"Nod yes or no, Soundwave."
Shockwave repeated in a menacing timbre. Soundwave quickly shook his helm with confused optics. Shockwave stood silently in a short daze before slowly sliding his gaze down and typing something into his data pad, then moving on to the next inquiry.
"Did Megatron save you from the Autobots when they did...this, to you?" Shockwave glanced to Soundwave's charred cables. Soundwave grit down on his denta, but tipped a small nod. The Decepticon scientist went quiet.
When Shockwave had used the cortic psychic patch and the psycube, he could not fully erase or create integral persons or events, only manipulate them. However, Shockwave had a feeling that Megatron would still be pleased. He sighed internally to himself as he moved his helm and looked down to the floor, the glowing purple and black banded cable of the psychic patch no where to be found.
For some reason, he couldn't stop this strange sensation of something nagging at his helm. It almost felt like...guilt. But, that was impossible. Shockwave dismissed it and went back to his questioning.
"Do you remember Megatron's start of the Decepticon revolution?"
Soundwave nodded.
"Then, do you remember our fr--time together before the war? In the Pits of Kaon?" Shockwave listed off, relatively inattentive, but was caught off guard when Soundwave hesitated to answer. Shockwave stepped closer, no way to discern the type of expression he was currently wearing.
"If you cannot recall that, do you at least know if you were ever a gladiator?"
Soundwave paused again, still somewhat confused by the unorthodox questions, but eventually shook his helm slowly in response. Shockwave gripped the data pad in his servo a little tighter.
"I see." He said under his breath.
"That is all I needed." Shockwave raised his gaze without a trace of emotion. "You will soon be released from here, but for now I would advise you to stay on the berth. I need to exit the room for a moment - I will only be gone briefly." Shockwave added the last part in warning as Soundwave started to sit up from the horizontal berth, no energon cuffs to be seen. Soundwave nodded complacently. Shockwave stared him down with his singular optic in suspicion for a bit, but eventually vented and tried to make his leave quick.
Once Shockwave made his way around the exit, his optic dimmed and he shook his helm, holding a servo to his cables mutely. That non-existent feeling of guilt was coming back again. He sighed, leaning back against the wall. Shockwave had to do something to feed this absurd 'feeling' before it consumed him.
Eventually, Shockwave regained his composure, and trekked back into the temporarily lab-turned-medical-bay, not surprised in the least when he turned the corner to see his patient disobeying his direct orders by being up and about.
In all honesty, Shockwave wouldn't have been all that concerned if Soundwave hadn't been next to his sensitive materials. Sensitive...as in experimentally dangerous. Shockwave wasn't about to let both his work and his painstakingly manipulated subject dissolve themselves into an unusable product, and swiftly made his way over.
"Soundwave!" The scientist began with a stern glower, "What did I say about leaving the-" Shockwave abruptly got cut off when a roughly drawn blueprint of something or other was shoved in front of his faceplate. Shockwave's optic darkened and agressively snatched the paper out of Soundwave's servo, about to rip it into asymmetrical halves before he caught a glimpse of the design between his digits. Shockwave paused, looking to Soundwave's hopeful and unagitated expression before begrudgingly uncrinkling the paper and inspecting it with an internal sigh at himself at even giving the sketch the time of day.
He was subtly impressed, however, at the drawing when he paid full regard to it; appearing well-drawn and thought out from the first glance. It was a design for a visor, as well as what looked to be streamlined additions to his armor near his cables, most likely to cover their damage. Shockwave held a long stare at Soundwave; his large, ruby optic unwavering in its bright glow. He seemed to hold such stares often, rather than speak his thoughts. Soundwave reeled back slightly from the intense stare, but kept his expression blank. Shockwave exhaled and took a final look at the blueprint in his servo before setting it on the station.
"..Alright. I shall help you create these. But, I will expect you to assist with the visor's completion for the more intricately technological details, and to follow along with the process so you won't have to come back to me if it ever malfunctions." Shockwave said finally. Soundwave's metallic grey optics brightened, and nodded quickly, taking the blueprint and adding a few details with a writing utensil he found laying around.
Shockwave slowly reached and touched the tip of his optic with his digits, adorning a distant, deliberative look. What was he getting himself into...
. . .
Soundwave let out a short vent and clenched his servo into a fist from the overhanging, nostalgic thought of the Decepticon scientist.
Not like it mattered. Shockwave was already dead and gone.
Soundwave shook his anguish away with cold, dull optics. Yet, he could not so easily rid himself of the overbearing weight of betrayal lingering in his spark, and the hollow ache of no longer having a place in the world. All was lost to him now.
There was no more a reason to live on.
Soundwave had absentmindedly traversed himself to the Nemesis flight deck, the cool air momentarily reminding him of his surroundings before he could walk himself off. His gaze traveled slowly to the edge of the ship, the blanket of clouds floating beneath shielding the ship's true height from the ground. Despite this, one would easily recognize that jumping from such a height would undoubtedly result in death.
"Master! Master! Please, whatever you are thinking! Tell me what is wrong before you do something you regret!" Ravage was starting to become on edge, his claws anxiously digging into the surface of the ship. Soundwave shifted his helm to Ravage.
Regret? It's already too late for that.
Soundwave straightened himself while he took a final look at the Nemesis. The place he always returned to at the end of his missions. The ship that he considered his base of operations for ages. His headquarters. His home.
No longer.
Soundwave gently tapped his chest plate, alerting Laserbeak to transform from them. Once they dispatched themselves into the air, they droned a questioning hum to their Master. Soundwave answered their minicon when they took a final step back that lead off the ship and fell back into the sky, silently. Ravage choked a gasp and raced to look down from where his master descended, only to see them sink into the clouds for a single split moment.
"MASTER!!" Ravage cried out, arching his back in distress. Laserbeak screeched a startled note before zooming down from the Nemesis with his master.
"Primus, what is all that yowling coming from?" Knockout scratched his audio receptor with an agitated snarl plastered across his faceplate. He locked optics with the source of the sound, and nearly got pounced on when Ravage bounded over, spewing out rapid convoluted slurs of beast-speech Knockout couldn't understand in the slightest.
"Hey, hey! What do you think you're doing, Dangerflouf?" Knockout exclaimed, backing up as Ravage struggled to explain the situation, yet hesitated momentarily at the unfamiliar nickname.
"What, is something the matter?" Knockout crouched down, noticing the beast's uncanny distress. Ravage beat the ground twice in acknowledgment. The mini-con edged out a growl, and raced to the edge of the flight deck and pointed down with his gaze and a single claw. Knockout's optics widened. "Who, Soundwave?" He asked. Ravage nodded his head clearly and thumped his tail twice. Knockout raised an optic ridge in question.
"Well, he can fly, can't he?" He shrugged nonchalantly at first, before his optics slowly widened.
"Oh, yes. He isn't supposed to leave the ship, is he?" Knockout deadpanned. Ravage only hoped that would be the worst of it. Quickly, the red mech stood and was about to start his way to the bridge before he slammed right into the torso of some bot.
"Hey! I'm in a hurry here-! Uh...L-Lord Megatron," Knockout's tone instantly changed when he looked up and saw Megatron's unamused expression staring down at him.
"Is there some place you need to be, Knockout?" Megatron questioned with a level tone. Knockout coughed an ahem, and kept his arms to his sides as he briefed Megatron of the situation. Safe to say, Megatron was most displeased.
"What? Soundwave leaving on his own, without any word or mention at all? That is quite unlike him.." Megatron dipped his helm in rumination.
"Quickly, pinpoint his location and bring him back." Megatron said, pinning his servos behind his back. The Vehicons stationed at the cybertronian consoles both nodded and searched for Soundwave from his signal. After a short pass of time, the two Vehicons lingering on the flight deck looked back at one another and then, reluctantly, to Megatron.
"I'm sorry my leige, but Soundwave has deactivated his tracking signal and disabled communications. It will take time to effectively find him without any reliable way of establishing his location." The ground-based Vehicon reported. Megatron bared his denta fiercely at them. "Then stop wasting time and search!" He ordered loudly. The soldiers flinched but promptly turned back around and went to work. Megatron pivoted to Knockout, the medic shrinking under his leader's intense glare.
"Go and alert the others. We must not let Soundwave go off on his own without any reinforcements." Megatron said, Knockout nodding quickly at the command and escaping into the Nemesis while he still could. Megatron turned his helm to the sky and clenched his denta.
What had gotten into Soundwave?
. . .
The Third In Command had transformed himself and stopped his free fall at the last possible second, wholeheartedly pondering while in descent on whether or not to actually let himself crash and die. He couldn't, though. In his thoughts, Shiner and his foolish sacrifice came to the front of his processor.
Shiner's life would have been in vain if Soundwave were to give up his life now. Soundwave, having lived through all kinds of strain and suffering, all to end up dying gracelessly and dishonorably by his own hand--it would have been all for nothing. But now, what was he to do? Return to the Nemesis, to once again swear his loyalty to the one who brutally tortured and effectively brainwashed him into returning to their side after he deserted? To serve the Decepticon leader that made him believe that the Autobots were his enemy, when in truth Soundwave had affiliated himself with his own foes all this time?
Never again. He'd rather join the Autobots than turn back to that fate.
Reasonably thinking, that option was highly unlikely, and also distateful, considering how long Soundwave had believed them adversaries, and likewise to the Autobots and his position in the Decepticons. It would be better to turn back to a Neutral, and go into hiding until they all lose interest in him.
That would have been the plan at least, if not for a groundbridge to have appeared right in front of Soundwave's path.
It was the four Autobots, all of them jumping out from the swirling greenish mass guns blazing.
Strange.
Soundwave had cloaked his tracking signal to all, yet they still managed to find him. What an aloof yet talented group of individuals.
Rank Scout Bumblebee was the first to surround him, followed by Bulkhead and Arcee. Optimus stared at Soumdwave dead on, his sharp battle mouthpiece over his faceplate with his burning blue optics narrowed.
"Soundwave, you are surrounded. We suggest that you stand down and peacefully come with us." Optimus Prime stated in his deep baritone. Soundwave slowly glanced around himself without turning his helm, noting the blatantly obvious escape route of transforming into his vehicle mode and then the equally obvious downside of him getting absolutely blown to bits the second he tried it. The Decepticon, or formally Decepticon, vented silently to himself. Guess he'd have to do things the hard way.
Within the blink of an optic Soundwave had reached his striped tentacle around Bumblebee and reeled himself in while easily flipping over their surprised blasterfire. The other Autobots would have been quick to counter before an unexpected turn of events occured as the high-pitched chirr of Soundwave's mini-con was quickly coming into reception, and increasing in sound as it neared closer as if it were some sort of miniature variation of a stuka plane.
"Laserbeak," Soundwave looked up to see his partner dive-bombing from the air for the attack. The mini-con sprayed out a flurry of laser bullets for cover fire once in range as Soundwave shielded himself behind the yellow and black Autobot whom was still struggling to get out of the tether wrapped tightly around them.
The cover fire couldn't hold all of the Autobots however, Soundwave quickly making notice when he sharply turned his helm at the disturbance designated as Arcee making a charge for him. Right when she made a swing at him with her blades, Soundwave pivoted around her with ease. His optics sharpened at the newly created opening, and kicked her down at the exact moment she had stopped herself with a surprising amount of force that shocked even Soundwave, along with the two-wheeler that coughed violently from the unexpected force of the impact.
Soundwave looked down and saw his servos trembling, not with fear, but excitement. This absurd rush of feeling that grazed every inch of his frame inside and out, was triggered by something nestled far inside either be it his beating spark, his processor, or perhaps both. Soundwave surmised in the moment that it was the result of his knowledge of the truth of his past, sequentially leading to his former gladiator instincts being fully reawakened. It was his only guess, since never before had he felt such a rush during a fight. That, and, his train of thought rapidly filling with nothing but a desire to throw his fists at something, or rather someone. Despite the fact that the numbers were against his favor, Soundwave wasn't thinking about the logistical odds. He was running purely on the delictable thrill of the battle.
Bumblebee had finally freed one of his arms from the Third in Command's grasp, and shot off Soundwave's tendril with little to no reaction from the former Decepticon. Laserbeak couldn't hold Optimus and Bulkhead for much longer, either. In spite of this, Soundwave couldn't help but spread a wide grin - one that felt vaguely uncomfortable with how exceptionally rare, perchance mythical an expression of that sort graced the Third in Command's faceplate - as he circled Bumblebee, sharing a dance of death which was all the Decepticon had his focus upon, even as vibrant energon leaked out from his wounded tendril. However, a nearly fatal laser shot from Arcee, still with her injured and flat on the ground except for her shaky arm canon slightly raised, by some means snapped Soundwave from his brief delirium, and he was almost thankful for it.
What happened to him just then? It suddenly came over him like a virus, taking over all his systems and mechanisms at once. He didn't feel like himself. And yet, Soundwave could tell that it was still a part of himself, somehow.
He shook his helm, dispirited, as he finally came to the perception that he was outnumbered. Brute force wouldn't win him this. Quick-thinking might.
Autobots are always inferior.
Bulkhead left the mini-con for Optimus to handle and put on a hostile expression as he headed for Soundwave with surprisingly fast, heavy stomps. The Ex-Decepticon had no fear, however, when he brought out his arm in front of himself, aiming at his selected target with the sound-related device Knockout had especially crafted. Finally, it would come to good use.
Soundwave waited patiently for the gadget to activate as he stared down Bulkhead's rampaging figure like a fool, shaking his servo a little in an awkward manner as an added gesture for it to start working when he began to get somewhat nervous.
Come on, come on! What's taking this thing?
Soundwave spoke inwardly in trepidation as he tilted his helm down and started lightly yet hastily beating on the device, hoping to Primus it might solve the malfunction. Of course, it had no effect, and Bulkhead was advancing ever closer with each passing astrosecond. Soundwave realized then that he should never have put his faith in Knockout of all bot's creations, now that there was no escaping his doom. The only thing Soundwave could think of in those final moments he had was one, singular, four-lettered word.
Frag.
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