Link's POV
I take Zelda out to the backyard. It's already dark out and nobody is out here. I hold on to her hand, looking at her from the side while she looks around with a smile.
"Look at all these cute light strings!" She says, pointing at the wedding decorations over our heads.
"Yeah it's nice," I say. It's cool how she always notices artsy stuff around us. I don't really pay attention to that stuff but I love how hyped she gets over pretty things.
"It feels good to be away from everyone for a second."
"You're not having such a good time, are you?" She asks with a frown on her face.
"The wedding is fine, I just got stuff on my mind..."
"I can tell. Does it have to do with whatever you wanted to discuss this morning?"
"Yeah..."
"If you want to tell me what's going on, I'll listen."
I can count myself lucky to have someone like her. I step closer and just hug her for a minute. She hugs me back and I swear it's one of the best feelings to just be held by her.
"It's okay. You don't have to tell me. But I hope you know that I'm here for you. No matter what."
I sigh... "I want to tell you... but... I think it'll make you sad."
"I'd rather be sad together than see you sad alone."
Goddamn it... She makes me feel so freaking loved. I think I'll just enjoy this moment before I tell her what's going on. I brush over her hair with my hand and give her head a kiss. I really hate having to ruin her mood but she deserves to know. And I really want to tell her. Maybe she knows a way to fix this. She did help me with the expulsion, maybe she can fix this too...
I close my eyes and take a deep breath. "I can't afford HU anymore."
"What?"
I tighten our hug. I don't want to lose this. "I... I lost my scholarship."
"Even though they expunged the expulsion?"
"Yeah, I think it's partially because it was a sports scholarship and now it's not clear if I'll even make the team again, you know? Maybe they'll give me a new scholarship for my senior year if I'm good enough to play by then, but even if that happens, I still have to come up with a shit ton of money for my junior year."
"No wonder you've been distracted all night."
"Yeah... sorry."
"No, it's okay, it's not your fault. I understand... I'm so sorry this is happening to you. Are you willing to take my offer? I'd like to pay for—"
"No."
"You're not even willing to consider it?"
"I did consider it. But I can't take that much money from you. There's just no guarantee that I'll be able to ever pay it back. Especially without sports, I don't know how else to make that much money."
"Link, you don't understand. It would be a gift. You don't have to pay it back."
"I do understand but..." I can't blame her for not understanding my point of view. She can't really know how much freaking money that is to the average person.
"I'm serious. I'll give you the money."
"I don't want that, Zelda."
"But why?"
"Would you take that much money from me?"
"No offense, but you don't have that much money to give. I do."
She's already done so much for me, I feel like I'm just taking and taking and not giving anything back...
"I haven't earned it," I say.
"What are you talking about? You deserve it more than anyone else. Most of the money you earned during your career, you donated. You could have been able to pay for HU yourself but you decided to help others in need first. You deserve it, please believe me."
"Thank you..."
"Does this mean you'll accept?" I slowly shake my head. "I will not be a passive bystander when you're about to lose the place you call home."
"You're so sweet and I love that you want to give me the money for tuition but I can't just take it."
"Then what are we going to do?"
I love that she says 'we' instead of 'you'.
"I don't know..."
"What about a loan?"
"It's just too much money. I'd be scared of not being able to pay it back. I don't want to be in debt."
"But... what other options are there?"
Exactly...
When I don't answer, her arms around me start to shake a little. I think she's holding her breath.
"Do you regret telling me?" she asks.
"No. I'm glad I told you..."
Her head is buried in my chest. She's taking this so calmly. I thought for sure she was going to cry. I cup her cheeks to make her look at me. She is crying...
"Can you finish your degree in Japan?" She asks, ignoring her own tears.
"Um... Yeah, probably."
"Would that be affordable?"
"Yes."
"You have two years left for your Bachelor though."
"Yeah..."
"What about us?"
"I don't know." This hurts so bad to think about. "We could try long-distance," I say and feel how my voice breaks. I think I'm really scared of losing her...
She turns around with stiff shoulders, probably still holding her breath. "My Make-up is going to smudge," she whispers. I don't want her to cry...
"We can visit each other," I say, not making it any better. I suck with words. Sports was the only thing I was ever really good at and right now I can't even do that right.
"I have a request."
"Okay, sure, what is it?" I'm pretty much willing to do anything to make her happy right now.
"Can we please look at all the options before you decide to move back to Japan? There has got to be some other way for you to stay." When she looks over her shoulder, I give her a thankful nod. "What if the money wasn't a gift? What if you worked for it? Would you take it then?"
"Like a job?"
"Yes. My father owns so many businesses. If he employed you, the salary could cover your tuition." I doubt that an undergrad college kid could make a salary of 100K but if there's a chance, I should probably welcome it with open arms. "Of course it wouldn't cover the full tuition but maybe enough for you to take out a reasonably small loan for the rest."
"Yeah that's... a possibility. It's kinda up to your dad though."
"I can talk to him first thing in the morning. Or better yet, I will join him at golf in the afternoon, that way I can address the topic while he is in a good mood."
"Do you mind if... if we both talked to him? Like.... together?"
"I wouldn't mind at all!" Her eyes light up with hope and I don't know how she does it but it gives me hope too.
"I just feel like I should be the one to ask him about a job since I'm the one who needs the money."
"Yes, that is very mature and courageous of you. He would appreciate you asking him yourself. Do you play golf? I could ask him if you can join us."
"Yeah, I mean, I'm probably not very good at it but I've played before."
"I don't think a sport exists you're not good at."
"In any case, I'm not good at it anymore..."
"Oh... I didn't mean to–"
"No it's fine," I cut her off before she can blame herself for my bad mood.
Her tears mix with a smile. She takes both of my hands. "Thank you for not giving up yet."
Why is she thanking me? If it wasn't for her, I wouldn't even care about HU half as much and I would definitely not ask her dad for a job. That man is a bit intimidating, even before I dated his daughter I had mad respect for him. But she said he likes me or at least he doesn't hate me so... Guess we'll see how it goes...
"Link..."
"Mh?"
"Regarding your injuries... I'm not a doctor, but my gut tells me that you'll make a full recovery. I have faith that you'll be able to play sports and compete with strength and stamina like never before. Because I know it's what you're aiming for, and I strongly believe that you can do anything you set your mind to. I think, after having seen your past recoveries, and after having witnessed your determination these past 3 months, you can get back to where you used to be, even if it takes time. But... listen.... this is important for you to hear," she tucks on my hands and steps closer without breaking eye contact. "It's also okay if you can't get back to where you used to be. I understand being under pressure and wanting to perform your absolute best, but limits are a reality and at some point, you'll reach yours. And it'll be okay. I'll still be by your side, your family and friends will love you all the same and have your back. And we'll still admire you for everything you've achieved. You're incredible, Link, in more ways than I can count. You don't even know how impressive your life is. Even if you decided you don't ever want to play sports again, that would be okay. I promise you've already given the world more than most people could only dream of."
Zelda's POV
Link's lips part slightly as he stares at me with glossy eyes. I hope I didn't offend him. I didn't mean to point out his flaws or make it sound like his injuries will lead to failure. Suddenly, he interrupts my thoughts with a passionate kiss.
When he breaks our kiss, he carefully pats the skin beneath my eyes, careful not to smudge my mascara. He is frowning at my tears. I soothe him with a weak smile.
"You make me so goddamn happy. I'm sorry for making you sad," he says under his breath.
I shake my head, trying my best to look hopeful. "Don't be sorry. I am grateful for your honesty."
These tears don't stem from sadness. Sadness is not what I feel... I'm... scared. Terrified. Of the thought of us living apart. I just never considered that Link will have to go back to Japan one day.
I was naive and ignorant enough to believe that we would be together forever but I forgot to calculate his nationality and visa expiration. After his studies, he is supposed to return to Japan. That's just what the law wants.
But... that day won't come for another two years. If I'm good at one thing, it's pushing problems further down the road. I will make sure he gets to stay and finish his degree in California, that's not even a question. I'm not worried about that. Even if I have to sell the lodge and make an anonymous donation, we will get him the money he needs.
"Hey, I have a question," I ponder. "Why do you accept scholarship money, which is basically the same as a gift, but refuse to accept mine? Where is the difference?"
"I'm not usually dating my sponsors," he gives me a faint smile.
"So? Are you worried I'll hold it against you in a fight? Or ask you to pay it back if we broke up? I would never do that."
"I know, I know."
"I'm sorry, I won't keep asking, I just don't really understand why you'd rather leave the US than accept money from your girlfriend."
"It's not your money though."
"Excuse me?"
"It's your dad's money."
I feel slightly attacked but I know he didn't mean it like that. "It is my money," I persist. "It's my bank account. Sure, he gave me the money, but that's just it; he gave it to me. I can choose what to do with it, whether I spend it, save it, or donate it."
"He'd know though."
"He doesn't have to know."
"He would know," Link repeats. "He knows I can't afford HU. Once I pay for school and he sees your bank statement he'll know you paid for my tuition. And then it'll look like I'm using you or taking your family's money or just being unable to pay for it myself..."
"Then we explain that that is not the way it is."
"It is though. I'm not able to pay it myself, so I would be using you, and I would be taking your family's money."
"You're not using me. If you were, you would have accepted the offer right away without second thoughts."
"I just don't want him to think anything like that about me."
"So you're declining my offer because you're worried about my father's opinion? I actually understand that. I wouldn't feel comfortable taking something from your parents either. But let's talk to him tomorrow and explain the situation. I'm sure he'll understand..."
Link nods and places his hands on my hips to pull me closer. I stifle a giggle, snake my arms around his neck, and wait for him to kiss me. But he doesn't. He just studies my eyes, unintentionally causing me to do the same with his. The strings of light bulbs that stretch across the garden are reflected in his irises, creating a nearly perfect resemblance of what I envision a starry sky to look like over the wild, tenebrous ocean waves.
"I'm grateful for you," he whispers in a serious tone.
My stomach flutters but my mind is stuck reading his mood. He's not acting depressed but he's also not exactly cheerful, he's not overcome by excitement but neither is he seeking distance. He is somewhere in between.
I lean closer, past his lips, to plant a tiny kiss on his cheekbone and another one on the bridge of his nose. It gets a smile out of him that affects me more than I choose to show.
"You mean the world to me," I say in a similar serious tone after leaving another small kiss just above his lips. I rest my head on his shoulder and silently hug him beneath the closest thing to a starry sky you'll find in Los Angeles.
If only I could tell him how much I truly love him. I should have said those words a long time ago, because now every time I wish to use them, it's just not the right moment for the first time...
Sometimes I wonder if the words 'I love you' really are as meaningful as everybody always praises them to be. I feel like they hold way less meaning than we think. 'You mean the world to me' expresses my love in a way that is solely and specifically used in regards to Link, but 'love'... We love so many things.
Now that I think about it, love has become such an overused word in the English language... It makes you wonder if it's truly the one perfect way to express your feelings toward another person. And not just any person, but the one you fall for... The one you rise for.
I love......
We express our "love" in the most meaningless and ordinary way. You hear it everywhere, every day. In even the most meaningless context. You hear them say 'I love that song, I love French fries, I love black coffee, I love your shoes, I love Netflix, I love the beach. I love sunsets, I love puppies. I love long showers. I love rainy days. I love football and candles that smell like citrus fruits. I love this, I love that.
I love you.
Are those three words really that different from the others? If so, then 'love' is not the word that holds all the meaning. It's you.
"Do you want to go back inside?" Link asks calmly, holding me with both arms around my back.
"What? Oh, er, not yet. In a minute."
"What were you thinking about?"
I rest my head on his shoulder and smile while the butterflies in my stomach dance to the faint music...
"You."
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(Heyy guys! I did not know that SO MANY of you were Miphali shippers hehee! Your reactions to the last chapter were so precious <3 Also, we're getting so close to 50K reads on NWY! Thank you so much! Love you guys :)