Vi POV
I was content with my conversation with Tobias. I believe he's gonna be a real good friend.
Amar led us to the fear simulation room. I've never heard of it. It's apparently where you go to experience your worst fears.
"Alrighty so, this is the fear simulation room, we don't usually do this first but we're trying out a lot of new stuff," Amar said.
"Suspiciously a lot of new stuff," I muttered to Zeke.
"Yeah, if something works in Dauntless, we don't change it, the initiation program has worked for centuries, there's no reason to bring in new stuff," Shauna added.
We had missed a bit and Eric was now going first.
"This should be good," I said to Tobias, "This guy's gotta have at least twenty fears."
"Yeah," Tobias said.
And the show began.
()()()
It took a while to get through everyone since Amar was insistent on me going last. He said something about 'oh, you're the first jumper, so you should go last'. I think it's a load of crap.
"Vi," I looked up at Amar, "Your turn."
"Finally," I breathed, standing from my spot on the floor.
We walked into the stark white room with mirrors on all the walls, like the rooms for the aptitude tests. I stood in the middle of the room, facing the large glass one-way window.
"Is this room a replica of one of the ones used for aptitude testing?" I asked.
"Essentially, yeah," Amar said, moving to inject me with the serum.
I felt the needle hit my neck, but it didn't go in.
"You having trouble?" I asked Amar.
"You seem to have a very muscular neck," Amar said, trying again to inject me.
He tried a few more times before I got fed up and grabbed the needle.
"What are you doing?" Amar asked.
"I'm doing it myself," I said before slamming the head of the needle into the side of my neck, it was painful, but I pushed down on the plunger before ripping the needle out.
Right before I blacked out, I felt a warm trickle of blood slip down my neck from where I had torn my skin.
As the simulation started, I continued to feel conscious. As my first fear began, I felt my shirt and pants fall away, leaving me in my sports bra and boxers. I instinctively wrapped my arms around my torso, hiding my toned stomach as my breathing quickened.
The hallway I was in was dark, but there was a light at the end. I walked slowly toward the end of the hallway and realized the light was coming from a cluster of candles. My breathing and heart rate both intensified as I walked into the room. I was greeted by a faceless man, his skin shifting colors quickly. He was only wearing boxers.
"Come on, Vi," that was the first sign that this was not right.
If I was going to be dressed like this in front of anyone who's dressed like, they need to call me by my full name, especially in a situation like this.
"Come to bed," he said.
I shook my head and turned and ran down the hallway. I heard someone running after me.
"Come on, baby! I just wanna have some fun!" the man was suddenly directly in front of me, gripping my biceps.
"Let go," I said firmly.
"Make me," he taunted.
I wrenched my left arm free and punched the man in the face hard enough to make him let me go. I hit him again in the neck before kicking him in the groin. He fell to the ground groaning before he faded away.
As the simulation changed, I felt my clothes reform, but they were drenched and clinging to my skin. I was in the middle of an ocean. My second fear. I felt immediately scared, but I didn't know how to get out of this.
Out of absolutely nowhere, a giant shark came up from underneath me, its mouth alone big enough to inhale the Dauntless compound with ease. I screamed in pure terror and hid my head in my arms, my knees coming up to my chest. I felt myself die. But I knew I wasn't dead because this was a simulation. I'm safe, actually in the Dauntless compound, not the inside of a mega-shark. I breathed deeply, despite the lack of oxygen, and the shark and ocean disappeared and moved on to the next simulation.
I was in my dad's house. My real dad's house. I visit him every weekend, due to his patronizing request.
"Zinovia!" he shouted in his Dauntless leader voice. Not his father voice.
"Yes, dad!" I shouted, but I didn't want to make a sound.
"Come downstairs, now!" he barked.
I walked slowly down the stairs and into the living room. I found my father sitting at the kitchen table, a knife sitting in front of him. This knife is the only thing I fear more than my father. Its handle used to be black, but it is now greying with too much use or misuse, should I say. The blade is as long as my forearm, blunted every night, sharpened every morning.
"You asked for me?" I said, gulping down the lump in my throat.
"Yeah, come here," my dad said, gesturing for me to come over to him.
I did as he said, although hesitantly.
"Lay down," he said, pointing at the floor.
Again, I did as he said, laying down quietly.
"Put your arms out, palms up," he instructed.
I did as he said as he stood, grabbing the knife by the handle and walking toward me, and squatting to get to my arms easier.
"What did you do today?" he asked me as he dragged the knife down my arm, from the bottom of my armpit to the inside of my elbow, to the tip of my middle finger.
He asked it so casually as if he's not scarring his only alive family member.
"I-ah," I winced as he dug deeper into my right arm, "I went to the Pit with Ezekiel and Shauna," I said.
"Ah, and what did you do, in the Pit?" he asked, "Before you answer, roll over onto your stomach and take your pants off."
My eyes widened, he'd never told me to do this before. But I wasn't in control. I did as he said, removing my shorts and placing them down next to me. I felt the blade start right under my ass, slicing down my thigh.
"I got a new tattoo," I said, tears streaming down my face.
"Oh yeah, where is it?" he asked, slicing down through the inside of my knee.
Blood was now staining the already blood-stained floor.
"On my left ankle," I answered, the pain already subsiding.
I felt him move my foot to look at my ankle.
"The Dauntless flames, a good choice," he said as he started on my right leg.
"Th-thanks," I said.
I realized there was no way for me to end this. My fear of my father overpowers any other rational thought I may have.
"Get up," my father commanded.
I did as he said.
The man in front of me raised the knife to my face and was about to drag it around the outline of my face. Just when I thought it was about to get worse, it ended. I was standing in the fear simulation room once again, and Amar was hugging me.
"What're you doing?" I asked him
"I'm so sorry," he whispered into my hair.
"You were watching all of that, weren't you?" I asked, my voice muffled by his chest.
"It's part of my job," he said as he pulled away.
"Please don't tell anyone, he'll do it more if it gets out," I pleaded.
"Vi, he's a Dauntless leader, the people need to know when their leaders are abusing their children," Amar said.
"I know, I know, but we need to wait before we say anything, wait until he's out of Dauntless," I said, "I know it doesn't make any sense, but please, don't tell anyone."
Amar sighed, "Ok, but who else knows?"
"Just Tori, and now you, and Max," I said, "And I'd like to keep it that way."
Amar just nodded and walked us both out of the room to the other awaiting initiates.
"What took you two so long?" Eric asked.
"None of your business, Nose," I snapped.
"Jesus calm down, it's not like you had that many fears, same with the Stiff over there," Eric jerked his head toward Tobias, who seemed scared of everything at the moment.
"Fuck off," I said to Eric before walking over to Tobias and squatting down in front of him, "Hey, Stiff, I mean that in the nicest way possible, what's wrong?"
"Nothing. Nothing other than having all your worst fears being shoved in your face and it is called 'learning'," Tobias said, "I'm almost regretting choosing Dauntless."
"Oh yeah? What - or who - is the thing keeping you from saying definitely instead of almost?" I asked.
Tobias turned red, "Well, she's tall, lots of piercing, very pretty, lots of tattoos too, red and blue hair, Dauntless-born," he said suddenly.
"Would I know her?" I asked.
"Yeah, her name's Vi," Tobias said.
"I'm-" I was cut off from shock, what does this mean? Does he like me? Does he like me?
"Alright, now that we've gotten through everyone, we're gonna head to the training room where you'll learn the basics of how to fight," Amar said and the Dauntless-born groaned, "Dauntless-born since you guys already know how to fight, I'll be pairing you up with a transfer to help them learn. There are more Dauntless-born than transfers, so some of you can spar with others."