My natural alarm clock kicked in causing me to bolt upright in bed. For a moment, I was confused as to where I was as the haze from my contacts started to push to the outer edges allowing me to literally wipe the sleep from my eyes.
It wasn't until I went to get out of bed that the memories from last night came flooding my mind causing me to nearly landslide to the floor.
I needed to get out of here. There was no way I could stay in this house another day, valedictorian be damned. Kyle could have it. I just wanted to go back to my bedroom, my simple life and to being safe Melody. Back to Jake filled mornings and secret crushes.
My mind was settled. No more Kyle. No more confusing confessions that have my heart racing a million miles a minute. No more holding my hand and wishing he won't let go. These were feelings I was supposed to have with Jake and Kyle was stealing them from me. From us.
I didn't wish for this!
But you did. You confessed that wish to Jake just two nights ago.
Slapping my palms against my cheeks, my fingertips swiped repeatedly across my eyelids until they were practically raw.
No. I didn't mean it. It was just a dream. It was just some mixed up crazy fantasy I had about Kyle and... and... oh God, I really like him!
Shaking my head vigorously, I swiped my lids again and again until I was wincing.
Reaching the bathroom, I took a long shower before finally dressing and tiptoeing out the door. Somehow, I made it to my car without bumping into anyone and the gate opened with no problem as I pulled out into the neighborhood street.
For some reason, I felt a little guilty leaving Kyle with Chloe knowing he took care of her during the night. But honestly, I was just two shakes of sheep's tail from going to Mr. Lloyd's classroom and calling it quits.
Maybe I could talk Kyle into a separation agreement where we could share the last few days taking turns with Chloe. I mean, the computer chip wasn't intelligent enough to know if we were living in the same house, right?
Argh!
My butt vibrated as my phone signaled that there was a message. Pulling into the school parking lot, I parked in my assigned space before pulling my phone from my pocket.
Shockingly, it was Jake asking to meet him after school today. Guilt stung my cheeks at the thought of facing him after all the thoughts I had running through my head earlier.
How was I going to even look at him in the eyes again?
Ah, snap out of it, Melody. You're sounding like a drama queen.
My thumbs moved to create a text back.
Can't meet today. Got Chloe.
Kyle's accusation that friend's lie had me backspacing the letters. Why did he always have to bring to light my glaring faults?
So, I typed out:
At your car or mine?
I shook my head at the simplicity of the message. I couldn't give an excuse as that would be lying and of course typing out save me, I think I'm falling for Kyle was a death wish waiting to happen.
My thumb hovered over the send button and then it was gone.
Letting out a sigh, I pressed my back against the seat closing my eyes. However, the unexpected vibration of my phone made me flinch.
The message Jake sent back made me smile.
Your car... duh :-)
I typed back a simple 'K' before putting the phone in my pocket.
Getting out of the car, I didn't expect to see Kyle standing in the courtyard waiting. But there he was with Chloe strapped to his chest, the diaper bag draped over a shoulder and wearing what... an apologetic expression? Wasn't it me who should be apologizing for leaving him with Chloe?
Squaring up my shoulders, I walked toward him trying desperately not to cause a scene like yesterday.
Stopping in front of him, I kept my eyes locked on baby Chloe's harness.
"I'm sorry," we both said at the same time which caused me to look up at him. His eyes looked exhausted causing guilt to slap at my conscience.
"I didn't want to wake you this morning," I said. It was a lame half-truth so I wasn't really lying lying.
He shook his head as if accepting the excuse.
"Can I take Chloe?" I asked. I didn't need to feel even guiltier when I met Jake after school.
"I'll keep her today."
"Do you have practice?"
He shook his head no.
"Then." I looked down at my feet. I felt like an ass asking him to watch her so I could be with Jake. However, Jake had somehow become my safety net as Kyle had become dark and uncharted waters that had me nervous just standing next to him, afraid I would fall in and drown.
"Can..." I looked back up at him. "Can you watch Chloe after school?"
I don't know why I felt he would get mad but he just nodded his head agreeing with the request.
"I'll take care of her tonight," I promised.
He shook his head saying no.
Placing my books and bag on the ground, I motioned for him to hand Chloe over.
Silently, he unclipped the harness and handed her over to me allowing me to strap her on independently. Pulling the bag off his shoulder, he held it out permitting me to reach for it. Our fingertips touched in the exchange sending a shockwave through my body causing my breath to hiccup.
Refusing to look up, I draped the strap over my shoulder and reached for my books and bag. When I stood, Kyle was already moving deeper into the courtyard alone.
Something about the way his shoulders slumped and his head staying dipped down had my heart squeezing and my feet itching to run to him. Something in me wanted to see how much of what he said last night was true.
What would have happened if I did kiss him on Sunday?
Walking through the nearly deserted courtyard, I moved at a snail's pace allowing the images of Kyle's features to fill my mind. It was difficult to think that when I was touching him on Sunday, he actually wanted me to kiss him. And now, my heart fluttered with hope that the opportunity would present itself again.
Maybe I should just walk up to him after school and just plant one...
The warning bell rang and I found myself having to lug not only Chloe and the diaper bag to homeroom, but my book bag and books as well.
When did I become so distracted?
After the final bell, I reached my locker just as Kyle approached. I could feel my hands shaking with fear as the image of me grabbing his head and pulling him down into a lip lock struck at my spontaneous nerve.
But his quietness and lack of... Kyleness was pretty unnerving.
My hands still jittery, we did another silent baby exchange and for a moment, I actually felt that I could get through the next few days if we stayed like this.
"Thank yo..."
"You ready?" Jake asked from behind me causing me to whirl around.
His fists were deep into his pockets causing the muscles of his forearms to tighten. His eyes glanced at me for a second before trailing to lock with Kyle's behind me.
Turning, I looked up at Kyle expecting him to be angry but instead, he looked down at me and smiled a half smile. Not a condescending one or a smug one. It wasn't even an angry one. It was like he was telling me to have a good time and meant it.
My mouth opened but my throat stayed hollow.
What could I say?
Kyle brushed passed me as he nodded to Jake causing even him to look surprised.
"What's up with him?" he thumbed over to Kyle's retreating frame.
Friends don't lie.
"I think he just conceded," I said more to myself.
"To what?"
Shaking my head, I looked up at Jake. Something inside me clicked. I don't know what it was and I don't know why but it had me blinking a few hundred times before I admitted, "I think I'm falling for Kyle."
Jake's eyes widened.