I rolled over in bed, pulling the sheets along with me as it felt unusually comfortable. I've been working so hard that I forgot what it felt like to sleep in my bed. It's a waste of money to not enjoy it. Today is one of those days when I don't want to leave, I also don't feel good.
I have a hangover.
Josh is the reason for that.
I slowly sat up, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes.
"Ah...", I winced as I held my head.
I have a bad headache. At least I don't feel sick, well not yet.
I moved the covers off of me and then swung my legs over the edge of my bed. I was still dressed from last night. I must have passed out or something, makes sense. A hot shower will wake me up.
I spent a long time letting the water relax my body. Since I don't remember where I'm supposed to be this morning, I wasn't in a rush to leave.
I put on some sweatpants and then headed towards the kitchen.
My eyes were still adjusting. Suddenly I felt something crash into me. I quickly reached for my belt for a weapon but forgot I wasn't in uniform. Good thing because I forgot she was here.
"Sarina?"
"Tyler. I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to scare you."
I rubbed my head, really trying hard to remember why she's here. I looked at her up and down to see she was still in her dress.
"You were here all night?"
"Y-Yes. Sorry, I was going to tell you. I didn't know what to do. I had left my money home so I couldn't call for a taxi after I drove you home."
That's right, she drove my car since I was drunk which left her stranded here.
"Where did you sleep?"
"On the couch. It's quite comfortable actually."
I looked over to see she made herself at home there.
I sighed.
"You could have...woke me up or something. I could have called for a taxi or at least told you about the guest bedroom."
"It's okay Tyler. I wasn't a planned guest."
"Yeah...but still—"
Now I was feeling the hangover even more now.
"Are you okay", she asked.
"Just...stay right there."
A few minutes later I emerged from the bathroom. False alarm. Still, I was feeling awful.
I headed back to the living room where Sarina was waiting.
"Do you need me to bring you food?"
I sat down before saying anything.
"I don't know. Maybe."
I closed my eyes and then I felt her feel my forehead.
"You feel hot Tyler! Are you coming down with something?"
"That's a possibility."
I haven't been taking care of myself for the past few months. Maybe this hangover activated whatever I ended up catching.
"I'll see what I can make for you. Don't move from here. Just lay down and rest."
I wanted to protest. She's not obligated to help me but I was too tired and feeling to awful to say anything.
I could see the kitchen from the living room. I watched her search through what I had, I doubt I have the ingredients she needs. Actually, since I'm not around much, I don't know what I have. My eyelids closed occasionally, but the smell she was making from the kitchen kept me awake.
After a few minutes she came over with a bowl.
"Here you go, it's chicken soup...just without actually chicken, but it taste good."
I sat up.
"How is it chicken soup?"
"You had chicken cubes. I also found some canned vegetables so I threw some in there too. Good vitamins to help you get better."
I then remembered Josh's mom stopped by that one time at the police station to give me a bunch of food. She was concerned I wasn't eating properly. She was right. I'm glad since it came in handy now.
"You don't have to do this for me."
"I don't see anyone else here who will."
I paused.
"Good point."
"Now eat up. I'm just going to clean up in the kitchen."
She turned to head back over but something was bothering me.
"Stop", I said.
She turned around.
"What's wrong? Is it the soup? Does something hurt?"
"You've been wearing that dress since last night. Go change."
"Huh? I don't have anything to change into, remember? This isn't my house."
"I know that. I mean, go pick out something from my closet to wear. Put on some sweatpants and a t-shirt."
"I can't—"
"Unless you really like wearing that."
"While it's pretty...I've been dying to change out of it so...I'll take you up on your offer."
She gathered the dress up around her legs to rush off to my room.
I finished the soup quickly. It's pretty good even though I didn't have much to work with.
I stood up to put the bowl away.
"I'll get that", she said as she rushed over to me.
"You sit."
She pushed me back down. I look up to see she looked comfortable wearing my clothes. I have too many anyway, a lot I haven't even touched.
"You should get some more sleep. You really need to rest. If anyone calls, I'll tell them you aren't feeling good."
"Are you my secretary now?"
"Yep, and I work for free."
I chuckled. She's so weird.
I took her advice and quickly fell asleep.
~
"You two, what did I say about fighting at the table or fighting in general?"
"But mom, he keeps taking my games without asking."
"That's no excuse to fight. You two need to learn to talk it out, you're brothers after all and Tyler you're the oldest. Being a big brother comes with responsibilities, right?"
I sighed.
"Right."
"Good. Hurry up so you can get to school on time."
"Tyler. I'm sorry for taking your games. I just want to play with them but you won't let me."
"It's because it's not for little kids. Didn't I say you can when you're older?"
"Yeah."
"I promise, okay?"
"Deal!"
"I wish I could have this cereal every single day! Right Tyler?"
"Yep!."
Mom laughed.
"No boys. You'll be bouncing off the walls."
"That sounds like fun!"
"Yeah!"
"So does cleaning those walls, right? Now hurry up."
"Yes mom..."
I played with the pieces of cereal with my spoon, wondering what it would be like to swim in milk. You won't smell too good if it stays on you though. Suddenly, my milk was starting to turn pink and darkening into red.
"Uh...mom..."
"Honey did you see my tie, the black shiny one."
"One moment Tyler."
The milk didn't look white anymore, it was all red, like dark red.
Is it...blood?
"Mom? Dad...the—"
"Just finish up Tyler. Dad's about to leave, you'll have to walk to school."
It is blood!
It's starting to rise out of my bowl, landing all over my legs. I quickly stood up and started backing away. I looked at my brother to see he was still eating, it's like he didn't notice what's happening. I turned around to see my parents.
I froze.
"Tyler. What's wrong? Are you done eating?"
"W-What's happening to...you...you're...you're..."
They looked hurt, really hurt. They were bleeding everywhere.
It's so scary! What's happening?
"Mom, dad!"
"Why are you helping us Tyler...help your brother", mom said.
I turned around to see he was gone.
"What's happening? What did I do?"
I looked down at my hands, it was covered in blood. On the floor was a trail of blood leading to my parents who were now on the floor, motionless. I ran to them, I kept running and running but I couldn't get close to them. I screamed for them. They became smaller and smaller. The house was stretching, being coming longer and longer. I couldn't see the end of it. Far away I could barely see two people. A little kid and a grown man.
"Tyler...Tyler help me!"
I reached out for him, still running.
"No! No!"
I started sinking into the floor. It wasn't solid, it's liquid.
It's red.
It's blood!
I'm being swallowed up!
"No...no...no"
"No...no...don't take him!"
I snapped up, my heart was racing, my breathing rapid. I was soaking wet. I quickly stood up, stumbling over myself.
"Tyler, hold on."
I felt two arms onto me.
"It's okay, you were just dreaming. It's just a bad dream."
She's right. It was just a dream but it felt so real. I can't shake it off at how real it was.
I quickly looked down at my hands.
"Sit down. It's okay", she said as she took my hands.
No blood but my hands were shaking badly.
"Slow breaths..."
I was really trying to calm down but it wasn't working.
"Look at me Tyler", she said in a gentle voice.
I did. She looked worried but wanted to stay strong so she could help me.
"You're okay. Whatever you were dreaming about can't hurt you."
Yeah, it can't hurt me but it terrifies me. It all happened and time after time I can't do anything to change what happened. Even in a goddamn dream.
"I couldn't...save them...", I whispered, my voice shaky.
I sat there, motionless. I finally regain control of my breathing and my shaking stopped. My emotions broke through once again. I couldn't fight it.
I started to move away ao she wouldn't see me like this but she stopped me.
"Don't go", she said.
"I'm fine."
She didn't say anything, she knew I was lying. I couldn't face her. Instead she forced herself in front of me. Her hands came up to hold my face so I could look at her and then her arms slid around my neck, pulling me in for a hug. I didn't hug back, I wasn't expecting this. She didn't care what I did. She was doing what she thought was best to help me.
I allowed it.
~
I don't know hiw much time passed. It's not like I was paying attention anyway.
"How are you doing", she asked.
"I don't know..."
"That's okay."
I was laying on the couch, she sat on the floor next to me.
"Better than earlier", I said.
"That's good."
Right now I feel at peace. Her presence alone feels nice.
The only other person ever to see me like this is Josh. I was scared of her seeing ne like that but I had nothing to worry abiut. She never once judged me or saw me as weak.
She doesn't have to do this for me, especially after I've treated her. I don't deserve this.
"Why?"
"Huh?"
"Why...are you doing this for me?"
Her silence made me look up at het to see she was upset.
"Why wouldn't I? Do you really feel like you don't deserve this, to have someone to help you?"
"I'm just used to pushing people away. You just kept on returning, staying to help me."
"Because I'm a human being Tyler. I always help people, even if I don't get treated right. I just wish you would stop think so low of yourself."
She quickly stood up to storm away. I reached out, catching her wrist.
She didn't turn to look at me.
"I should get going", she said quietly.
"You're right. I'm just not use to this. A stranger coming into my life out of nowhere, free to judge me but you didn't. I don't know how to feel about it. I automatically feel like my life should be a punishment because of what happened to me, what happened to my family years ago. Last night, you showed me it's okay to have fun. Even before that, just the little moments of joy you bring, it's something I don't know how to handle."
"Well, I'll show you how—"
I stood up. Without thinking, with feeling, my arms moved around her, hugging her from behind. She was caught off guard.
I didn't let go.
"T-Tyler...y-you should be...resting..."
"I'm sorry."
Her hands came up to mine, slowly lowering my arms so she could turn around to look at me.
"If I'm going to be sticking around or keep bumping into you, I need you to promise me one thing."
"What would that be?"
"Promise me you'll allow yourself happiness because that's all I know. That's how I can help you."
I chuckled.
"Sure."
"Promise", she scolded.
"Fine. I promise."
She lifted up her pinky.
"Seriously", I said.
"Yes!"
I rolled my eyes and then looped my pinky around hers. She smiled. Satisfied I gave in.
"Now get some more rest. Watch some animal shows or something, you're not supposed to be up and moving right now."
She took my shoulders, shoving me back down onto the couch.
"Yes doctor."
She frowned and then smiled.
Yep. She's extremely weird. One of a kind.