And then I think I was designed to be alone
She could't stop the tears from falling. After weeks of holding this she finally let it all out. Hands shaking, her heart betting so much faster then usually, but she felt free. Her eyes were still on the little flower she was holding. She wanted so bad to look up and lock eyes with him, but what if he now saw her different. What if he now find her a monster. What if he doesn't love her no more.
All the what if's were cut when two hands were placed in Mia's crying face. Her eyes found his, but they weren't full of anger or disgust like she predicted. No, they were still looking at her with love and passion.
Montgomery De La Cruz was still in love with Mia Jensen.
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The next morning Mia Jensen woke up for school in a happy mood. After her long conversation with Monty yesterday, the blond girl finally was accepting her mistakes and was ready to be a new her. But before her change start she still needed to do something about her brother and the tapes. She was not sure in which tape he was, but either way she needed to be sure he was not going to say something to put them all in bad sheets.
It was very normal in the Jensen residence for Mrs.Jensen to go on a run every morning, and for a couple years Mia did the same. But as the years went passing by Mia stoped with that and she started to go to the gym with her friends. And like that many other things she used to do with her family she stoped and started new traditions with her friends.
The Jensen girl was in the kitchen with her father preparing the breakfast, laughing at something he had said, when her mother walked in. Mia and Mrs.Jensen were still not talking very much with each other, but on the other hand Mia and her father were on talking terms again.
"No dad, you toast the bread first then you put the avocado" Mia explains to her father. Once the girl saw her mother arriving to the kitchen she left and went to pick her stuff from her bedroom.
"Any news from Clay this morning?" Lainie askes her husband puring a glass of water and watching her daughter leave.
"I heard the stirrings. Some thumps and mutterings and such" Matt says mixing the food that was in the pan.
"We need to get them back to Dr. Ellman"Lainie says "They won't take the meds but the talk therapy was always helpful."
"Feel like it was more helpful for you to have them doing it" Matt says trying to pick up the toast from the microwave.
"Yes. It was helpful to know they were talking to somebody. Or at least Clay was" The older woman says making a quick pause to drink a bit of her cold water before continuing "Mia still isn't talking to me".
Matt Jensen moves to place the plate in the kitchen table" Not everyone share your passion of belive that all problems can be solved with words" He says.
"For God's sake Matt. You have a phd in literature. Your whole life is about words" She says in disbelief.
"Yes and how they complicate everything" The men says, still putting all the breakfast in the table.
"They are in trouble, we need to help them"
"They are acting out, yes. We don't know if they are in trouble"
Matt Jensen was a loving parent. Loves his kids more than anything but has a special bond with his daughter. Now, he doesn't say he has a favorite kid, because for a fact he doesn't have. But he can't deny the bond that he and Mia have. The teennager girl found so safe in her father's arms since day one.
Matt was the first loving parental figure that the young girl had. He cared, and still does, so much for her. Since day one of the adoption that Matt Jensen made everything he could to make Mia feel so much loved and appreciated. So it was safe to say he really loved her as his daughter. Never ever made her not feel welcomed on his house, her house, the family Jensen house. Home that she for a couple years now has been part of. She belongs with them, just like they belong with her.
If she could she would quote a Saint called Saint Antonio, where after one of his many miracles he said "onde estiver o teu tesouro, aí estará também o teu coração" which means "where your treasure is, there your heart will be also".
And she now knew that her family was her treasure.
Mia and Matt used to do so many things together, like fishing, the girl hated the smell she got in her hair at the end of the day or the clothes she needed to wear but she loved the adventures the two of them used to live. Unlike her runs with her mother, Mia did not stop going fishing or doing other activities with her dad because she thought that her friends could be a better company. The reason was because of the two years ago events. She thought that maybe she was designed to be alone.
"There is a reason school is sending out so many emails" Mrs.Jensen tells her husband, that was not sharing the same opinion as her.
"A girl died Lainie, and they siad they barely knew her" The older man shouts above his wife, trying to make his point visible.
"Hannah Baker didn't just died, she slited her wristes and blood out in a bathtub".After Mrs.Jensen finished her statment, both parents noticed their kids standing at the entrace of the kitchen, listening to their parents conversation.
"Clay" She starts.
"We have to go to school" Mia says, picking up her car keys from the kitchen table "I haven't made you guys luch yet" Their mother says.
"We buy our lunch" Mia picks up her brother arms and starts to walk out of the door to her car that was stading in the drive way.
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"Have you talked with him yet?" Justin asks.
"What am I supposed to say J? He won't belive anything I tell him" Mia was stading by the lockers next to the rest of the jocks, talking to Justin about Clay, obviously.
"I don't know, you are his sister after all, he will belive you"
"Not when he was in love with her. The girl we killed" Justin let's out a depp breath, in his head he was trying to convince himself they did not killed her, I mean it was her decission after all, ending her life, she could have deal with it diferrently, she just chossed that one way.
"Whatever, if you don't want me to do something, then you better start taking some actions" He threats.
" And you better watch the way you are talking to me Justin Foley." Mia loved Justin, he was her brother, but she also loved respect, and she did not let anyone disrespect her nor threat her.
From afar Mia and the rest of the people standing in the hallway could seee Clay shouting at this new girl, that for a coincidence was trying to open her locker- Hannah Baker old locker.
"I am sorry, sorry" The new girl apologizes .
"What the hell" Clay shouts.
" I can't get it open"
For the rest of the conversation Mia did not payed a lot of attention, it was just some random girl at her dead friend old locker, nothing important, she thougth.
Flashback:
"I am sick of it you know. Just because I don't have her skinny ass body doesn't mean I am fat" One of the girls from Mia's communication class says.
" Maybe she should try a diet" Pratters says out of nowhere.
"Seriously Pratters? Jesus!" Hannah Baker asks in disbelief.
Mia was sitting by Justin side while Zach was sitting on the other side of Justin aswell. Now, Mia was not a person to fatshame someone, it was just stupid. If the teen girl was to shame someone it would be by her personality or the way someone would dress or even by that person make up. But never ever by someones weight.
" I am just saying, if you being fatshamed then... Don't be fat alright" He says. Mia couldn't belive what she was hearing, he couldn't be for real.
Mia was just going to say something about it when Zach spoke.
"Pratters, that's like someone saying to you, don't be a idiot and a dickwad. Can't help it" Zach says, obviously, making known the point of his statment.
"Exactly. Thank you."
"Totally not on your side dude." That made the whole class share a laugh, including Hannah that looked back at Mia, trying to see if she was looking at her or even listening to the conversation, but she was faced with Mia smilling down at her phone. Where Hannah guessed she was smilling at something Montgomery had said to her. God she really didn't like him at all.
Complement bags, was the new investment made by the school, to cause some kind of happiness in the students. But sometimes it ended up causing the opposite in many parts, because while some bags were full of praise, like Mia's, there were others that didn't even have one.
When the bell rang Mia guarded her stuff and headed to her little bag of complements. Spining the little metal thing, where all the bags were, Mia found her own. A little paper bag with her name spelled with pink sharpie and a little flower that she draw on the first day they got them.
She opened the bag and took out the first piece of paper, it was written on it You have the prettiest smile, she didn't reconized the hand writting, she whished she did, she always found these so sweet. The next one it had writting sexy mammaaa and that one she did reconized the hand writting. It belonged to her favorite person on the world, Montgomery De La Cruz. She chuckled once she read it, that boy could make her look like a fool.
The last paper for that day, it had writting something she was not quite ready to read, it was You don't cross my mind you live in it. At first she thought that it was Monty, but that hand writting didn't look like his at all, it was to pretty to be his.
Mia was to focused on her own little complements for her to notice the conversation happening behind her, between Hannah Baker and her friend Zach Dempsey.
"It's kinda soul crushing, you know" He says and walks out to leave the classroom, leaving three girls alone in it.
"Seriously? He is Zach Dempsey, does he really need complements" Hannah asks Sheri.
"We all need them Hannah" Mia says turning around with the three papers on her hand.
"You got any" Sheri asks.
"Yep, about five today. What about you"
"Only five ?" Sheri asks for confirmation which Mia noods.
"Were they felling less inspired" Sheri jokes, making Mia laugh.
"Five complements is really good, what are you guys talking about" Hannah deadpans.
"Oh we know it. It's just that Mia normaly has around ten to fifhteen complements everyday" Sheri explains.
Hannah looks at Mia shocked, that was crazy.Ten to fiftheen complements everyday, just on those little bags. God being her must be really great she though.
"It's nothing. People are just really nice to me " Mia says, while placing the papers on her back pocket of her jeans and walking out of the clarrom.
End of Flashback
The school cafeteria did not have the best food, but since Mia didn't have any lunch she had to eat in the cafeteria. She walked with her tray to the table that was filled with jocks and some girls trying to get the jocks.
Some random girl was sitting in Mia's place, and after analyzing her for a couple seconds she realized she was the same girl that called her in the restroom, the same day Monty got in the school fight with Alex.
"That is my sit" She spoke nicely to the burnet girl, but once she didn't make any move to the side and looked at Mia up an down, Mia put on her bitch face and told her " Move now, that is my sit" and just like she predicted the other teen girl moved.
Even though Mia only menat to her to move her sit, the girl moved table and left quicker then she predicted she would. That made Mia chuckel, how can some people be so easy intimidated she wondered.
Once Mia sat at in her place, she noticed right way Zach's face looking at Clay, which she guessed, by the look in her brother's face, that he was in Zach Dempsey tape.
Flashback:
"Where is he going?" Justin asked Mia that was standing on the other side of the table. They watched Zach leaving his friend group to go somewhere. Marcus had just arrived a couple seconds ago, with a box full of name tags with his own face, for the election.
"Don't know"Mia answers, her eyes following him to Hannah Baker table" Oh God no" she mutters.
After a couple of minutes a yell was heard by all the students in the cafeteria, and like Mia had predicted it was Hannah Baker. Just soon after that first yell, Zach yelled " Fuck you " to her and starts to walk back to the table.
"Dude, seriously" Justin chuckels "What is the point of you even tempting with that girl"
"Yeah, been there, forgot that" Marcus says.
" Oh guys shut up. leave him alone" Mia says moving to the side and gesturing for him to join her. But once he didn't, she knew that something was really wrong.
"Don't you need every vote Marcus" Zach asks.
"I don't need that one" Marcus gestures to Hannah.
"Guys, leave Zach alone" And when Mia finally thought that Bryce was going to say something smart, he dind't" He is just desperate to lose it, before his dad has to buy him a hooker" Bryce says laughing at his own joke.
" Not funny Bryce" Mia says watching Zach leaving the cafeteria.
End of Flashback
Since Monty was suspended from school, Mia found her schedule pretty boring. She missed him, his hugs out of nowhere, his little kisses, and the dirty things he would whisper in her ear just to see her blush and get all shy .
The classes went so much slower without him and the cheer practice wans't even that fun without hearing him cheer for her, shouting how much he found her hot in her little skirt and pom poms.
She just wanted him next to her again.Part of her knew that it was his fault, if he droved slower, none of that would have happened. But it was much easier to think that it was Alex and the rest of the commite fault.
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So this chapter took a little longer to be upload because school is killing me and so I haven't had time to upload and edit nothing.
It's currently 2 am where i live, and I just finished writting this cahper. I haven't edit anything but I will soon. So if there are any mistakes I am sorry, i will correct them later.
kisses Barbara <3