Respectfully, an Absolute Mess

By ercthesloth

91K 3.3K 11.3K

college au Transferring to Trost University was either the best or worst decision of your life. Getting thro... More

Prologue
New Beginnings
The Great Kirstein
In Present Times
Penis Party
Apartment 104
Blonde Devil
PEMDAS
Talking is Hard
Hickies from the Girl
Charcuterie
The Hitcident
21 Questions
The Snack that Smiles Back
Halloweekend I
Halloweekend II
Stinky
Failure
Slumber Party
Second Place
A Jealous Brute
Into 2021
Stir
The Rice Purity Test
Deli
Professor Ackerdaddy and the Drunken Horse
Marco
Sherlock, the Sous-chef
Domestic Blues & Bongs
The Filler Word 'Like'
The Sun, Moon, and Whatever is: Colt Grice
F in the Chat
Never-ending Woes
Attainable Solutions
Triangles
Parenthesis, Eren, Multiplication, Division, Addition, Subtraction
A Prelude to the Nigh
Cocktail Weenies
There's a Time and Place for Everything
Duct Tape on a Bullet Hole

Digital Filling

1.4K 80 226
By ercthesloth

Science Sluts
Thursday, November 4 9:30 AM

Connie: good morning all

Connie: did any1 see the passive aggressive email from colt yet orrrrr just me

Sasha: checking now bb 💕

Connie: kk

Connie: feel like he's calling us out

 I just read it

u guys want me to text him

Eren: send ss

Sasha: open ur email dipshit

Eren disliked 'open ur email dipshit'

Connie:

Eren: damn

Eren: Hange probs told him I dipped the other day

Eren: mid class too lmao

and i was with u

ugh

Connie: ur both dumb

Connie: Wtfffff is up his ass tho

Sasha: butt plug prob

Sasha: y/n go talk to him

y me

this is JANK

Sasha: bc u have his number

Connie: ur also a hot girl

Connie: show him ur boobs or something

Eren: no

^^

no showing of the tiddies but ill reach out ig

but im not texting him right away

give him time to ~cool~ down

Sasha: whatev makes u happy

Sasha: just fix it so he doesn't fail me

Eren: he'll fail u for fun anyway


Jean
Thursday, November 4 9:45 AM

morning

u wanna do something today?

my class got cancelled

Marcos in drug therapy stuff before
class annnnd im bored

hi hello

uhhhhhh

I have class at like 11

me and Marco have Ackerman at 3 not sure if he's going

he's not

school exempted him for the week

nice he needs that

Yea fs

soooooo

smoke?

shore

not like I pay attention during public speaking lmao


Sasha

Thursday, November 4 10:00 AM

U text colt yet

No

he needs to chillllll

girl I do NOT want to fail that class

text him

Send him nudes or go on a date idc

just make sure he doesn't fail me

also

Where tf r u

ur not in ur room

u were literally just there wtf

im w jean

oh?

😈😈😈

no no we're just smoking

go away

tell him I say hi

I did

he said

u smell

🥺 ok no that's mean

tell him to take it back

text him yourself

I WILL

are u guys like actually smoking tho

yes


JEAN GOT A BONG

it's Connie's lol

Stop why didn't u bring me :((((((

cuz

it's cuz u want private time with him again

s l u t

no it's bc me and him are good friends

Good friends don't snuggle in beds

I snuggled with Eren

like I said, good friends don't snuggle in beds

OR kiss them

👀👀👀

oh shush

do you like him?

who?

that's up to you lmao

no

liar

If we're talking about Jean I'm def attracted to him

but like I don't have time to put effort into anything more

So if you did have time would you date him?

Idk

well technically you two have gone on dates

he buys you ice cream

He drives you home

You guys got food the other day

You're with him aloneeeee

Hello

why aren't you responding

Helloooo

Hellllooooooooo

Omfg ur ignoring me

SMH u bitch

I'm telling mikasa to hit u for me when she sees u in class

hello

????????

Connie
Thursday, November 4 10:30AM

can u drive me to class

yeah sure

what time should I pick u up

I'm in ur house

...

ok well that makes it easy

WAIT ARE U USING MY BONG

mayb

I JUST BOUGHT HER NO

Public spanking
Thursday, November 4 11:00 AM

Connie: why does Reiner look like he has to take a massive shit

Connie: like the man is on the edge of his seat having cold sweats

Historia: ik im sitting next to him

Historia: he's gripping the table so hard

Historia: his man sweats smell bad to 🤢🤢

Connie: ask him if he's ok

No ignore him

He sucks

Connie: u suck

Connie: cuz... u sucked him

Historia laughed at 'cuz... u sucked him'

Mikasa laughed at 'cuz... u sucked him'

😡😡


Historia

Thursday, November 4 11:45 AM

heyyyy so not sure if u care but he's not even taking notes

like he's just staring at his laptop

idc

Too high to care tbh

😔😔😔

I think u should reach out

I think I shouldn't

he seems so lost though

I don't associate myself with men who have the audacity to call me a whore

u still talk to Eren

????

I didn't mean to piss you off I'm just telling you facts

who told you that

Mikasa

not Sasha ?

No mikasa did

ok

let's drop this

Eren apologized anyway


Marco

Thursday, November 4 1:15 PM

wyd

prepping for class 

u good?

I just got out of therapy

I wanna smoke 

Are you sure that's ok?

yeah as long as I don't do anything hard I should be fine

I'm so dependent on weed too 

I feel like I'm in a fog

Idk maybe you should try and detox from everything

everything but weed

Marco :/

Hey

Hey hey

Do you know where my backpack went?

I asked jean about it he said he doesn't know

I have no clue sorry :(

if I find out I'll text u I promise

thank you 😊

you're the best

ofc

so can I come over to smoke ?

I don't get high before Ackermans classes 

If I didn't have him today I so would I swear

I do wanna see you tho !!

yeah no it's okay

I get it

I'm skipping his class anyway so why drag u into my bool

I'll text jean and Connie

I think jean wanted to hang with you so I would text him 😋

and maybe u and I can do something later?

You guys hung out today?

we smoked in the morning

just u an him?

yeah

cute

:/

what!!!? I think it's cute

Cmon you and him are cute together

shush I'm trying to study

😘😘😘

text me when you're out of class

Marco
Thursday, November 4 4:45 PM

Hey! Ackerman just piled on stuff for me, 

so no can do for the hanging tonight. 

I'm literally about to go talk to him in his office.

I'll see you this weekend tho :)

all good <3

ily


Eren

Thursday, November 4 5:00 PM

How was class??


Eren

Thursday, November 4 5:45 PM

Hey sorry I didn't respond right away

It was good

Got another A

Ackerman was talking to me about another scholarship paper

Shittttt really?

That's so good I'm so happy for you

🥰 I'm happy too

It's just a small paper too for a bit off my tuition but every bit counts

Yeah I get that

You're gonna get it ur the best

What do you have to write ?

It's just a personal thing about struggle lmao

you'll get it

hey did you talk to colt at all??

no not yet lmao

okay perf

perf???

yeah no need to

I got it all figured out

huh?

I'll talk to him

u sure?

yeah :) positive

u wanna come over tonight?

I rlly want to I swear but i have sm work to catch up on

Let's do something this weekend !

I'm going to the bar with Armin tmmr so no Friday

sick invite bro

it's guys night chilllllllll

come over sat morning

I kinda miss you over here haha

get a pet

no animal can compare to you



Colt

Thursday, November 4 10:40 PM

so sorry to text this late I know you must be sleeping or busy but can I call you ?


Colt

Thursday, November 4 11:00 PM

sorry I was in the shower

yeah sure you can call 

I can't talk long though I have a lot of work to catch up on

It'll be quick I promise


Colt

Friday, November 5 1:15 AM

thank you sm for talking with me

I really appreciate it

no prob :)

see you Monday ?

Yeah 😊


Sasha

Friday, November 5 11:00 AM

why is ur door locked

let me in

I brought u Starbucks


Armeeen

Friday, November 5 11:15 AM

do you wanna go to the library with me to study for Smiths midterm ?

yes!! I was planning on going there today

perffff, I'll swing by at like 12?

yes omg the later the better

I just woke up lmao

long night ?

you could say haha, I'll tell I more about it when you pick me up

Totally ! You need anything, I might get Dunkin'

nah I'm good Sasha brought me Starbucks

ok cool- lmk if you want anything tho!

ofc armin


Red Bitch

Friday, November 5 12:15 PM

hey

hi

so since Marco is no longer dealing I need someone to get me some addys

lmfao what

Floch I'm not a dealer

u have the wrong number

do I though ?

??????

I know you have his backpack

I don't

I saw you leave with it

call me

what?

I'm not texting you about this

okay give me a few


Suite Sisters
Friday, November 5 5:45 PM

Mikasa: y/n wya

Sasha: ^^^

Sasha: seriously we haven't seen u all day

I saw u this morning

Sasha: I SAW UR HAND

Sasha: ALL U DID WAS GRAB THE DRINK AND CLOSE THE DOOR IN MY FACE

...

I'm at the library

Mikasa: are you coming back home? I'm thinking of ordering in food

Sasha: yeah we can't decide between Chinese or pizza

pizza

Mikasa: pizza it is 🍕🍕

Mikasa: when you leaving so I know when to order

Jean is picking me up at 6

Sasha: oooooooo

SMH he's just driving me home since I don't have a car

Mikasa: Eren would have picked u up

Jean offered

Sasha: u gonna give him a thank u kiss 😘

no

stop with the whole jean and me shit its annoying

I'll be home soon order pizza to come at 7

Sasha: make sure to give him a smooch goodbye


Red Bitch
Friday, November 5, 6:30 PM

So can you come over?

I'm not going to you

Are you stupid

no

come over for your bf

hang w him after you sell to me

the world doesn't know i have the bag 

only you for some fucking reason

also

I don't have a bf

yeah okay

you just disappear into him room to just talk

yeah exactly!

and smoke !!

whatever

how am I gonna get my drugs

just like 

meet me somewhere

yeah? Like where? A non-disclosed address?

This isn't fucking meth you're selling me 

All the idiots in my house are going out anyway

just come over

No car

There's this thing called walking

You have two legs

dude

if you don't get me these I'll tell Jean and Connie you have the backpack

let the world know

I have a huge fucking exam Monday 

 don't tell them anything

I'll be over at 8

good

But make it 8:30 I have a girl coming over

ok

cool

Text me when you're here


Red Bitch

Friday, November 5 8:30 PM

Here


Red Bitch

Friday, November 5 8:45 PM

Here

Doors locked

cold out

b down in 5


Red Bitch

Friday, November 5 8:50 PM

FLOCH

I'm coming I'm coming



Reiner

Friday, November 5 11:45 PM


is  Jean?

huh?

Is that whyyoy won't go out wme?

bc onf that idiot

Reiner 

I have no idea what you're talking about

ik what u did

i d like competition I wouldn't have fuckedu inth 1 plxe

you're drunk

stop texting me

shut up

of course thats what you spell right

talk to me when ur not intoxicated

inwanna talk

Pick up the phne

No

Armin said u n Jean hve been fucking

Armin said that???

yeah

That's news to me

pickup

Y/n

Y/n

Pick up the damn phone

i wanna talk



Armeeen

Friday, November 5 11:59 PM

hi

call me when you can



Connie

Saturday, November 6 12:35 AM

YO U UP

Yeah

???

GET TO THE BAR RIGHT NOW

why what's going on

hello??

Connie?

JEAN THREW A PUNCH

at who?

What?

Connie what is going on

pick up the phone

Connie

REINER

I'm on my way

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