Warnings: anxiety, insecurity, Zendaya being a queen, Fluff
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"Honey, are you ready yet?"
You weren't. At least not mentally, but that wasn't what Chris was possibly asking or thinking about. He wasn't thinking at all when he asked you to be his date to the Oscars.
Blaming him would be childish, since you are his girlfriend and it's the most normal thing in the world to ask you to be his date. There was no act of force, either. You could've easily said no. But you didn't, because you were stubborn like that.
Your stubbornness was the reason for your anxiety now.
"Uh Chris, gimme a couple of minutes!"
You scoffed, like a couple of minutes could cure your heartbeat and the fact that your hands were shaking so hard that it looked like there was an earthquake. Why did you say yes? You were going to go there, everyone was going to laugh at you for being ugly, Chris was going to see it too and dump you and you would be back to zero in your life.
Just when you thought of escaping through the window, just like Rachel did in Friends, Chris walked in the bathroom.
"God, honey, look at you. The prettiest woman I have ever seen. Are you nervous about going with me to the Oscars?"
While Chris was waiting for an answer to his question, you were wondering how soft his velvet suit would feel. He looked insanely sexy and you couldn't believe he was all yours.
"Uh, you okay there Y/N?"
Instead of saying 'no Chris I'm actually nervous, I don't want to go I'm going to have a panic attack' you said : "Pfft, you kidding? I'm totally fine. Let's go. I am so excited."
Yep, you were going to die tonight.
"Chris, over here, man! Look this way!"
You had never seen so many cameras together in your whole life. Flashing lights, celebrities who were posing, interviewers with their questions. It all made too much noise inside your brain. Every click sound of your camera made you flinch more.
Chris, noticing you getting uncomfortable, hugged you tighter and started giving you kisses on your forehead.
"Just be you, baby, just be you." Whispering this in your ear was a great idea to Chris, but it was actually one of the worst. You didn't want to be yourself because everyone would hate on you. Faking that you were okay was the best scenario for you, and for Chris. This way Chris could enjoy his night and you wouldn't embarrass him.
Chris spotted Zendaya and Andrew Garfield and walked towards them, knowing that Zendaya could comfort you in a way he couldn't. He knew you weren't fine, and that you were lying to him. He saw it on your face. Your lips quivered, and your eyes were not shining when you smiled like they always did.
He hated it, but he knew. He was the reason for your anxiety. Chris couldn't imagine going to events without you by his side.
"Omg, hey girl, how are you?" Zendaya embraced you in a hug while Chris and Andrew greeted each other with a handshake.
"I'm good. Thanks for asking. Where is Tom?" You prayed to the lord that Zendaya wouldn't notice your anxiety. Because if she did, that meant that Chris did too and you've been lying for nothing.
"Oh, you know him. He doesn't like red carpets, makes him extremely nervous. Speaking of, how are you holding up? Are you okay? You look a little tense."
Not having the power to lie anymore, you told your best friend the truth.
"I'm freaking out and think I'm gonna have an anxiety attack. I can't handle all the cameras on me. The fact that Chris is happy is killing me because I don't want to ruin that a-"
"Hey hey, calm down, okay? Take a deep breath. Let's get you to the bathroom." She turned to where Chris and Andrew were still talking, and gave Chris a sign that the two of you were going.
"Chris, Y/N and I are going to the bathroom real quick. We'll catch up with you guys later, okay?"
You tried to give one of your best fake smiles to show him that everything was okay. Why couldn't you be honest with your own boyfriend? Chris just nodded and walked toward you to give a kiss on your forehead.
"I'll see you later, okay? I love you so much baby, you do not know how much." Scenting his smell was like taking a hot shower on a hard day. Your body relaxed completely, and you finally took a deep breath without shaking. He took off with Andrew while you and Zendaya went to the bathroom.
" I could tell you to wash your face, but your makeup looks too good for that." That was the first time you've actually smiled that night without faking it. Zendaya always knew how to cure your anxiety, even before you and Chris met.
"Tell me what's going on in your head right now Y/N, walk me through it." Lookin at her face, you saw she was concerned for you. After taking a deep breath, you told her everything. How scared you were that Chris was going to leave you. The scare you had that people would judge you and your outfit, basically everything that was going in circles in your head right now. Telling her your problems was always easy since she listened to you without judging.
"I just can't do it anymore, Z. The only time I felt relaxed tonight was when I smelled Chris' scent. How do you guys do it? Tell me how you can just stand there looking like a goddess when thousands of cameras are taking pictures of you without feeling nauseous." How the hell was are you going to support Chris in the media world when you can't even survive in it?
"You know what I understand from what you just told me? That Chris was your only person who helped you in this entire case. You don't have to be here Y/N. Tell him you don't want to go to these events. I mean, look at Tom, he doesn't wanna go since it makes him nervous. I'm not forcing him just because he's my boyfriend. Instead, I respect his choice and feel grateful that he trusts me enough to share his emotions with me. Communicate with him. That's the key here. And don't tell me about that 'I have to support him' crap, cuz there are other ways to support him. Believe in his dreams, show that you love him. I don't know repost the trailers of his new movies and tell how proud you are. But please, talk to him. It's gonna make you feel so much better. Girl, what are you gonna do when he smells awful one day, huh?"
The both of you were laughing at the joke. The difference was that you had tears in your eyes and she didn't. Zendaya was totally right. The only thing that you should've done was to communicate with Chris and tell him you don't want to go to big events. He would understand, he always did. Not believing in your own stupidity, you gave Zendaya a big hug. Or at least tried, since she was extremely taller than you.
"Thank you for your encourage, Z. You're right, I have to talk to him. And damn girl, that was a wonderful speech. Made me want to thank my makeup artist for using waterproof mascara."
Smiling once again, she broke the hug and gave you a look that you saw many times before.
"Now talk to your man before I make you, go! I have to fix my lip gloss. But if you don't, I know where to find you and talk to Chris myself!"
When you left the bathroom, Chris was standing there looking at his phone.
"Chris, where is Andrew? Were you waiting for me?"
Looking up from his phone, he gave you one of his biggest smiles that made you melt like an ice cream on a hot summer day.
"Oh, Andrew went inside already. I wanted to wait for you. Are you okay, honey? You looked different the whole night and I don't know why. Talk to me, baby, please."
Reminding yourself about Zendaya's wise words, you talked to him about your feelings.
"Chris, you know I love you, right? I'll support every decision you make and follow you to the end. But these events, I can't do this anymore. Every click of a camera makes me flinch. I hate the fact that people are looking at us and thinking that I'm ugly and not worthy of your love. And yes, I should've said no when you asked me, but I couldn't. You look so happy and excited every time I say yes, disappointing you is the last thing I want to do in this world. Accept my apology for not coming to you and explain my feelings sooner. And thank Zendaya, since it was her idea."
This was the third time you didn't fake your smile the entire night. And the second time that Chris' smile melted you instantly.
"Thank you for sharing your feelings with me. You don't know how much that means to me. You think I love these kinds of events? I hate them so much. The only reason I get excited when you say yes is the fact that your scent calms me down and is the cure to my anxiety. When you stand next to me, looking like an angel from heaven that blessed me with their presence, it makes me the proudest person in the world. You know why? Because you chose me, honey. You chose me to love, to support, to hold. Can you believe how incredibly lucky is that I am the chosen one? Your name is in every prayer of mine, Y/N. So if you don't want to go to an event, tell me. I want to be the last person on earth to make you feel anxious. Don't be another person for me. Be you, baby. That's all I want."
The second speech of the night that made you cry. Your makeup artist was going to have a big raise after this.
"You and you poetic words, Evans. How can you say those things without practicing them?"
Taking you in a hug and smelling your scent, Chris whispered in your ear so gently that you got goosebumps.
"Because I love you, baby. You're my muse. My definition of love. Let's get out of here. What do you say?"
Looking deep in his eyes, the two of you enjoyed each other's presence. His poison and cure was you and your poison and cure was him. You wished that the world could see how much you loved Chris. But the world didn't matter right now. He did.
"Actually, I want to see if Andrew is going to win the Oscar. I want to be there for him."
Giving you a look, Chris wanted to make sure you were okay with staying.
"I wanna stay, we can go after they announce best actor. Plus, my anxiety is much better right now and I want to sit down because my heels are killing me."
Taking your hand in his, the two of you walked inside the enormous hall. While he was searching for your seats, you were looking at the celebrities. There were so many celebrities gathered together, it freaked you over once again.
After sitting at the right places, Chris looked at you with a concern.
"You sure you want to stay? I'm sure that Andrew won't mind if we're not here when he wins."
You pressed your lips to his, sharing the same breath. You put your hands on his thigh and neck, while he hugged you closer to him. after a couple of seconds, he released you with a proud smile.
"I am completely fine. Your scent certainly helps me calm. Just stay with me and everything will be fine."
Kissing you once again, Chris couldn't be happier with you. He felt lucky that you shared your feelings with him and promised himself something at that moment. He would never take you to this sort of events and would not go himself other than his own movie premiers.
"Whatever you say, honey, I support every decision you make. I love you so much."
"Oh look, Chris Rock is on stage. Looks like we're gonna have a good time."