Niall's POV
I feel like jumping off a cliff, my world came crashing down as soon as I heard those words leaving from the mouth of the love of my life. It's too much to take in. My dreams, my wishes, my life, all the planning I did for the better future for us, all went down the drain as soon as found out he is fucking pregnant. I can't blame him for falling in love with someone else because I never expressed my feeling for him. I never told him how I felt about him, I was waiting but I didn't knew that we'll end up like this.
How can I hurt him? How will I ever be able to look at him, when I know that he isn't the Zee I use to know? How will i ever be able to face him knowing that i touched him, when i should have been in my limits? But i couldn't control myself. I've been waiting for so long to have him in my arms.
Now i know, he'll never love me, i actually never had the chance but i still was obsessed for him. I forgot that before any of the shit he still is my best friend, the friend that I've spend my whole life with. The friend that have leaned upon me when he couldn't find anyone else in this cruel world to lean on. I broke it all, I broke his trust, I broke our friendship, I was going to freaking rape him. How can i? How can i be so cruel to him?
I was sobbing my heart out. I didn't wanted this to happen. I never wanted to be a monster for him, it just happened. I don't know how. I have never cried for anyone but when it comes to Zayn I can feel every single emotions within me, be it crying.
I was avoiding it all, but I couldn't. At last I did what I shouldn't have done, I'll forever be regretful and guilty about what I did. I was dreaming about this day since so long but now when I had it all in front of me, I let it slide just like that. He loves Harry and it isn't going to change. I will never have a chance with him.
I pulled my cellphone out of my pocket. I called Chris, after a few ring he pick it up.
Hello scar, why did you call? you said you would be busy doing an important mission.
He said while I could hear a bit of shuffling in the background.
"I have an important information for you, inform Harry that Zayn is with me. Tell him to deal with Stephen, I'll bring Zayn to him, safe and sound" I said with my stern voice. I can feel that his face must have been showing surprised expression. He might be wondering about how i got to know it all. I ain't no mafia leader for nothing.
"I don't know what are you talking about scar, I aint in contact with Harry Styles. I've been working for you and only you. I don't know from where did you heard this absurd information but it's not true" he replied with hesitation clear in his voice.
"I've been aware of it since long, you don't have to act in front of me anymore. You can't hide this. I am not your leader for nothing. How long were you going to hide it from me?" I replied with a knowing tone. It'll be better if he'll stop lying to me. What's it with people betraying each other these days? It's like no one can trust anyone but just themselves.
"I've been keeping tabs of your calls. I've been watching your every moves but you were busy enough that you didn't even were alert of your surrounding. You were careless enough to let me do all this with you" I continued to let him in on his doing.
"I'm sorry scar, I was tied with love. Whatever I did is all because love someone. I have to keep them safe so I lied do you and hide that I was also working for Harry Styles. He was the one who protected my love from Stephen, now it's my responsibility to protect him with all I have. I didn't wanted to betray you that's why I didn't tell you about all of this. I swear I never told him anything about you. I always made sure that he have nothing to do with you, I'm so sorry i really wanted to tell you about all of this but I was compelled with my own love" he replied, I could feel the regret and guilt in his voice. I know it wasn't his intention to betray me, I know he was compelled, I know how it feels like to be in love.
I'm very familiar with all of it but the thing is he is still with the one he loves, while I'll be letting go of the one who i love. This is sick, i shouldn't let him go, i shouldn't give him back to Harry just like this, but what's the use of hiding him here and not telling Harry, Zayn is pregnant and Harry would want to be by his side, if not Harry will raise hell upon everyone which no one would want to happen. No one would like to cross path with Harry twice, that if they are alive after the first.
"Its okay Chris, i know how exactly you felt. But you should have told me about this, i would have helped but its okay. Now inform Harry about what i said and i know that you are well aware of who killed Zayn's mother" i definitely know that he knows because Harry gave him the job to find it all out.
"It's Stephen, he killed Zayn's mother" he replied timidly after a few moment.
"I wasn't sure that i should tell Harry about this because Stephen was his best friend, but when things turned out this way, i told him everything about what i found out" he continued.
"Its alright just do as i said. Tell him to wait and not search for Zayn till i call for next time. If he wants Zayn safe, he'll have to wait for the right time" i ended the call without hearing any further. It was too much for me just for one day. I couldn't handle all of it.
I remember the information I got from a source of mine when i asked them to dig in more about Zayn's mother death. Police might have closed the case without even inspecting or trying to find the truth but i didn't wanted to believe their so called reasons. At that time I was young so I didn't think much but when I became a Mafia leader I did what I had to.
They found a camera recording that was right across from Zayn's house. The recording showed that a black car stopped infront of their house and Stephen stepped out of it followed by his few bodyguards. He went inside and screaming and breaking of things could be heard. After like an hour he stepped out of house with splashes of blood on his white dress shirt that was now mixed with a shade of red. The camera wasn't far so we could all see it clearly without much efforts.
I didn't wanted to let Zayn be aware of any of this because it would have affected him in many ways, and i couldn't stand that heartbreaking sight infront of me. That's why i kept it all to myself.
I might have done everything wrong till now but I'll do everything i could to make it all right. I'll let go of this feelings i have for Zee and I'll stay in his life as his best friend. I know it'll be harder for me to watch him go, to let this feeling go but i can't hurt him anymore. He was the only one who have understood me since the beginning and I'm not going to let it all go down the drain just for my fucked up feeling and obsession.
I'll have to wait till Harry will deal with Liam and Stephen because if Stephen will get to know that Zee is pregnant then their life will be at stake. Stephen is in love with Zayn, he knows that i have Zee with me. Soon he'll ask me to let him see Zayn which i can't let happen. I'll have to put up a drama that Zee attacked me and ran away but before that I'll have to shift him from here to somewhere no one will find him.
I will have to be careful though, Stephen isn't naive or stupid. He might be keeping eyes on me. I'll have to be careful with my moves. I do have a slight idea about how to do it all without grabbing much attention but I'm still not sure. If it was just Zee i wouldn't be this much careful because i can easily shift him from here but there is a baby in the picture, I'll have to be more careful.
I promise you Zee, you'll have your Harry by your side soon. You might not want to see my face again, you might hate me for what i did, you might be very disgusted right now but trust me, it wasn't my intention to be like that. I'm very sorry, really very sorry. Please forgive me.
I closed my eyes thinking about many ways in which I could apologise in. He might not want to forgive me but I'll try till my last breath. Today was really something else. It was far more of what I've assumed it to be, but I'll hope for the better tomorrow.
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Sorry if you'll see mistakes i typed it all in just an hour. I wasn't planning update so soon but I'm trying to fill for the time I've been gone.
I'm sorry if the chapter is short but I'll try for next time. Few more and then I'll be done. Again I'm not sure about the next update. Thank you for reading this shit even though it might never make sense.
Till next update.. enjoy loveliess... ❤️