I told the kids about my plan of going home. And they were so excited knowing it. Hindi kasi nila naranasan makapunta sa Pilipinas. Nato-topic ko lang sa kanila 'yon at sinasabihan ko naman sila na I have a parents in Philippines.
Nag-impake na kami ng mga gamit namin. Jake told us to visit if he had time at magkasama kaming apat na babalik ng Pilipinas. We will be using Zianna's private plane kasi mayaman naman 'yon.
"Mommy? Should we bring all of our clothes?" Gulantang akong tumingin sa anak ko.
"What?" I chuckled. "Baby... You only bring what clothes do you think that you like. We will just buy there if you ran out of clothes, okay?"
I caressed Princess's cheeks before she went back to their room. I let my room open incase they want something from me. Nag-iimpake rin kasi ako ng mga damit na kailangan ko.
Tapos na akong asikasuhin lahat ng mga kailangan ko asikasuhin. Uuwi na kami mamayang gabi ng Pilipinas. Princess and Diana's school let them take online class or home school. As per condition that we will pay a teacher to teached them online.
And I agreed with them... I don't have any choice but to agree. It's urgent so it's fine for me too.
"Tapos na akong ayusin ang gamit ko. The plane was on the way kaya saktong 7 or 8 ang flight natin." Zianna came to my room.
I nodded. I put my neccessities in my luggage at tapos na ako. I brought two big luggages in me kaya okay naman na 'to. I will just bring also if I ran out of clothes.
"Jake will be here in a minute too." He will send us to the airport kasi wala kaming masakyan.
"Okay... Ako na ang bahala sa kids." Nakangiting sabi niya.
"It's fine... Ako na. I'm done preparing narin kasi. You should rest first kasi mahaba-haba pa ang byahe natin." Sabi ko sa kan'ya.
"Para ka namang hindi nasanay sa'kin! Ginawa ko ngang magkapit-bahay 'yong bansa natin at ang Canada." She rolled her eyes.
Palibhasa kasi may sariling eroplano kaya mabilis lang nakakapunta dito. She bought it 3 years ago para daw hindi na siya sumasakay ng public plane.
I take care the girls clothes and luggages. I checked their luggage if they bring so much for this. Nakita ko naman ang mga gamit nila na maayos na nakatupi. Some of their toys at isang pack bag na naglalaman ng gadgets nila.
"Good job, girls." I complimented.
Their smiles widen when I said those. They like to be complimented a lot of their small achievements. At their age, they already know how to be independent. They know how to take care of theirselves.
"Is it enough for our clothes, Mom?" Diana asked.
"Of course, anak. It is. We will just buy there if we ran out of clothes okay? I'm sure we can't stay longer there after we visited grandpa. Your online class will be temporary." Pumantay ako sa kanila.
"We can't stay longer there, Mom? Why?" Takang tanong ni Princess.
"I thought we will be staying there for good?"
I sighed. "I never said those, Diana. I only tell you that we will visit grandpa there. He is sick that's why we need to go there..." I looked at them eyes to eyes. "Do you understand me darlings?"
The both of them pouted, I comb their hair softly. Hindi pa naman talaga ako sure kung magtatagal ba talaga kami do'n. Time will tell. I just don't want to give them false hope that we will stay there longer.
We heared a man's voice coming inside our condo. I smiled widely.
"Ninong is here..." Mahinang sabi ko.
There face lightened up and run towards the living room. We saw Jake with a donuts on his hand. Kaagad namang kinuha ng dalawang bata 'yon.
"I bought it for a last eat with all of you. I'll surely miss you and the kids. Maglalaan ako ng oras para bisitahin kayo do'n." Sabi niya at pumunta sa'kin at hinalikan ang noo ko.
I smiled sadly. "It's okay if you are that busy, Jake. You don't have to worry about us. I will tell the kids nalang to call you para hindi mo sila mamiss."
I watched the kids happily eating their donuts that their Ninong brought them.
"What will you say again?" I reminded them.
"Thank you, Ninong Jake!" Sabay na sigaw ng dalawa.
"You're Welcome, babies." He softly uttered.
Jake has a soft spot for kids because of his special sibling. Kaya masaya siya ng kinuha ko siya bilang Ninong ng mga anak ko. Hindi man naging kami, atleast naging Ninong siya ng mga anak ko. And we stayed as what we are in the first place, we are still friends.
We arrived at the airport at 7pm sharp. Jake drived us to the airport, ayoko mang lisanin ang lugar kung saan ako namulat sa totoong buhay. I still wanted to see my father.
No matter how I loved the place, I need to go home because family matters. Iyon ang sinabi ko noon na kapag nawalan ng trabaho si Thadeus dahil sa'kin. His family will suffer and I don't want that.
Because at the end of the day, family still matters.
"I will surely miss you girls..." Jake uttered to the kids.
"We will miss you too, Ninong!" They hugged each other.
I can't help but to smile and feel emotional because of the scene. Alam kung gustong-gusto na nila akong tanongin about sa daddy nila. But instea of asking it, they keep it to theirselves. I can see it on their eyes how they longed for a father.
"Ingat kayo do'n ah? Balitaan mo 'ko kapag nakarating na kayo." He kissed my forehead and Zianna's.
"Take care also, Jake." Zianna uttered.
"Oo naman... Ingat ka dito ha? We will make a video call for you. Kapag na-settled na kami do'n. See you soonest, Jake!" I waved my hand.
I can see the redness on his eyes... Maybe, trying his tears from falling. Hindi ko rin naman maiwasan na mamiss siya at ang lugar. It would take us a while before we can be back here.
I looked at the dark sky and the star who twinkle at night. Kahit pala gaano kadilim ang pinagdaanan mo sa nakaraan... Meron at meron parin talaga ang magbibigay sa'yo ng liwanag.
At ang mga anak ko 'yon.
They came to my life in my darkest days. I was filled with darkness but they came and give light to me. I supposed to get married to the guy I don't love. Pero dahil dumating ang mga anak ko sa buhay ko, hindi natuloy.
Seeing them grow as a fine young lady, I realized that they were a blessing to me. Sila ang nagpapatunay na wala akong pinagsisihan sa nagawa ko. Their father got me pregnant and it was fine because I love him.
I never seen myself being in love with someone other than their dad. Kaya hindi ko matanggap na ipapakasal ako sa iba para sa isang business. Because that is a lifetime commitment.
And I don't want to marry someone I don't even like. It will only be hard for the both us. Hindi ko nga masikmura na makita ang mukha niya, ang makasama pa kaya sa araw-araw.
"Are you nervous?" Zianna asked me when we settled on our seat.
"A bit." Maikling sabi ko. "I never seen them for 8 years, Zi. And I'm excited to see Philippines after 8 years." I sighed.
I'm sure marami na ang nagbago sa Pilipinas. I have a lot of branches of my flower shop. Pero never sumagi sa isip ko na magpatayo sa Pilipinas. But I will surely put a branch here.
"Zi? Help me find a place in Manila for my business."
She nodded. "Wala ka nga palang branch dito 'no?"
"Yeah... Never naman kasi sumagi sa isip ko na maglagay ng Princess Diana flower shop dito." Sabi ko habang nakatingin sa bintana.
"Because you don't want him to find out?" Napalingon ako.
"Of course not. It's just didn't crossed my mind." Nagkibit-balikat ako.
"Oh really, Nat? Hindi ba talaga sumagi sa isip mo? Or ayaw mo lang talaga? I won't believe you that it never crossed your mind, Natalia." She teased.
I rolled my eyes. "Whatever. Zianna."
She chuckled before putting her earphones on. Nasa kabilang seat siya habang nasa unahan ko ang dalawang bata. I looked at the lights down.
Sobrang ganda ng mga ilaw sa baba kaya hindi ko maalis ang tingin ko do'n. I really admire how darkness filled with lights.
I am nervous of the thought that I'll be going to where I live. People used to admire me because of my beauty and the way I live. Everyone taught that I was having a nice life. But they never saw behind those pictures that dad posted in his facebook.
I don't know what people think about me when I left Sorsogon. I forget the feels of being there. Nakalimutan ko kung gaano kaganda ang Sorsogon simula ng umalis ako.
Hindi ko rin alam kung kumalat ba sa'ming lugar na buntis ako. I left Sorsogon without a word when they pushed me away. If I only knew that they will abandoned me, I shouldn't hurt Thadeus. I shouldn't break-up with him.
May sarili na sana akong pamilya na buo at masaya kasama ang taong mahal ko. I should choose him instead of hurting him. Wala eh, mahina ako. I can't fight for the love that I want.
We arrived in Sorsogon at 6am. I never told Mom that we will be coming home now. I wanted to surprise them.
"Welcome back, Nat." Zianna greeted me.
"It's good to be back, Zi." Mahinang sabi ko.
"Is this Manila, Mom?" Princess asked...
"This is Sorsogon, Princess. My hometown." Nakangiting sabi ko sa kan'ya.
"It so hot, Mom. Is there any snow here?" Nakakunot ang noong sabi ni Diana.
Pumantay ako sa kanila. "It's really hot in Philippines, anak. Unlike Canada that there are snow. Philippines is a hot country but you will get used to it." I messed her hair.
"Can we take off our jackets, Mom?" Princess asked...
"Of course, anak..."
They both take off their jackets and give it to the guards. I hire two bodyguards for us while we stay here. Gusto ko lang kasi protektahan ang mga anak ko. At para narin may kasama kami kahit wala si Zianna.
I'm scared going somewhere with my kids without having a guards beside us.
"The car is here..." We saw the limousine that Zianna owned.
"Come on, darlings..." I hold their both hands as we walked to the car.
"The car is so nice, Mommy! Who own this?" They both said in unison.
Ginala nila ang mata sa loob ng limousine. They admire it so much. Ngayon palang sila nakakita ng limousine kaya sobrang saya nila.
"Tita Zi owned it." I mumbled.
Their eyes widen and looked at Zianna who has a proud smile.
"You own this, Tita?!" Diana exclaimed.
"Yes, sweetheart. Do you like it?"
She nod her head. "Can we use it everyday while we were in the Philippines, Tita?"
"Anak..." I called her attention.
Hindi naman kasi pwedeng palagi naming gamit 'to. It's a head turner when you used limousine in the Philippines.
"What, Mommy?" Inosenteng tanong niya.
"We can't use it everyday, anak. We will just use my car in our house. I have an old car..."
"But Mom... I wanted to use this." She pouted.
"What did I say before Diana?" I reminded her.
She sighed heavily. "If Mommy says no, it's a no and it's final." Mahinang sabi niya.
"Good job." I nodded.
Zianna hold my hand and I looked at her confused.
"You can use this car if you want, Nat. I bought this not only for me but also for you... Just incase you wanted to go home in the Philippines." She uttered softly.
I shooked my head. "Nakakahiya na Zi. I have an old car naman siguro sa bahay, 'yon nalang ang gagamitin namin."
She sighed and nodded. "Fine. But tell me when you want to use it okay?" I nodded.
"Thanks for everything that you've done, Zi. I do appreciate it so much. Hindi ko alam kung saan ako pupulutin dati kung hindi dahil sa'yo."
"I was your childhood friend, Nat. And I will help you in any ways that I can. Sino pa ba ang magtutulongan kundi tayo-tayo lang?" She smirked.