Wanting What I Shouldn't

By Book_obsessed_weirdo

1.2M 18.9K 13.3K

Amara Brady, the schools nerd, her name unknown to any normal persons ears. Straight A's and perfect homework... More

The Main Characters
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 39
Chapter 40
Chapter 41
Chapter 42
Chapter 43
Chapter 44
Chapter 45
Chapter 46
Chapter 47
Wedding Theme
Chapter 48
Chapter 49
Chapter 50
Chapter 51
Chapter 52
Chapter 53
Chapter 54
Chapter 55
Chapter 56 (Bonus Chapter)
Chapter 57 (Bonus Chapter)
Epilogue

Chapter 38

17.6K 214 106
By Book_obsessed_weirdo

   Opening my eyes, a bright light blinds my vision. A pounding in my head making me groan.

   What the fuck happened last night?

   I shift myself into sitting, my body stiff and sore. A blanket falling from my shoulders. Looking around my black, bright room. It's quiet, the sunrise just starting to peak through the French doors.

Why am I on the floor?

Quickly I stand up, my back stiff and tight as I scan my room. A painful groan leaves me as a headache pounds through my head like someone's repeatedly hitting me with a hammer. My fists sore and burning.

   How much did I drink?

   The door creaks and I turn to see Amara walking through the door with a water bottle and Tylenol. "Baby?" Her soft voice asks, I blink my eyes, staring at her morning figure.

   I hum in response watching as she walks towards me, her hips swaying in tight black Nikey shorts. One of my white t-shirts tied at the waist. A pair of my black socks pulled a third way up her shins. Her long brown hair pulled up into a high ponytail, the bottom of her hair brushing just below her shoulder blades.

   "How are you feeling?" Her voice is so quiet and soft, the way she swiftly drifts across the marble tile of my room. The shorts hugging her hips as she sways her way over to me.

   I shrug my shoulders as she gets closer, within arms reach. My hands instinctively make their way to her hips and draw her into me, leaning down and kissing her forehead softly "Why was I on the floor? Did I do something wrong and you made me sleep on the floor?" I ask and she giggles softly, handing me the water bottle and some Tylenol "No, you were shit faced drunk and said that if you slept in your bed it would be cheating on me so you grabbed a pillow and slept on the floor," I untwist the cap of the water bottle and throw back the pills, taking a swig of water.

   It just now catches my attention that my hands are wrapped, "What did I do?" She smiles, raising her hand and brushing her fingertips along my jawline.

   "You beat Caleb up, and then told me to fuck off because you had a girlfriend," she whispers pushing up onto her toes and kissing my lips softly.

   I raise a brow at her "Oh yeah?" She giggles, her lips pulling up "Oh yes, you were very clear that you had a girlfriend." A smile pulls at my face, my lips touching hers once more.

Her lips are shaped in a smile by the time she pulls away, her eyes twinkling brightly up at me.

She's gorgeous.

I quickly move my lips to the bare spot behind her ear that always makes her giggle, but instead my lips meet...plastic?

What?

Pulling back in confusion I stare down at her, my brows pulled together. She smiles at me, a rosy pink dusting her cheeks.

My eyes divert back to the bare spot behind her left ear and there it is. Another tattoo. My name, tattooed along the curve of her ear, but far enough back to be visible with her hair pulled up.

"Kingston's," I read the tattoo aloud and she nods, her neck flushing red, she fiddles with her fingers, her eyes never leaving mine as I stare down at her lovingly.

   She raises her arms, trailing her arms up and curling around my neck, hooking her arms behind my neck, leaning close until her head rests in the middle of my chest.

   I'm sure she can hear my heart beating out of control.

   "I've always been yours sugar," she whispers into my chest and my hand comes up and cups the back of her head, holding her against my chest, loving the fluttering feeling in my stomach.

   Her skin is so soft against mine, her hair soft and silky under my fingertips as they twiddle with the wispy hairs at the nape of her neck, my other arm drifting around her waist.

   The long sigh that heaves from her chest satisfies me knowing she's comfortable with me. Her eyelids falling closed, snuggling her face further into my chest.

  Warmth spreads through my body like wildfire, every little movement of hers igniting a new spark.

   "I made you breakfast, well we, as in your mom, dad, and me," she murmurs against my t-shirt, her cheek squished against me but in the cutest way.

   I drag my hands down to her bare thighs, gripping them in my hands and hauling her up into my arms, cupping her thighs as she wraps her legs around my waist, grinning down at me. The silky skin has me shivering delightfully.

   With her legs around my waist and arms around my neck I walk us out of my bedroom, ignoring the sore feeling in my back and arms, a painful ache from sleeping on the ground.

   My Amara's in my arms and happy. That's all that matters.

   Laughter drifts from down the stairs, Mason and Dawson's laughter evident along with Drake and Liam's, Mark's is in there as well. The girls laughing drifts to my ears and a smile overtakes my face.

   Amara grins, placing kisses all over my face as I carry her down the long staircase. Each place her soft lips touch spark a new shiver to dance through my spine, gathering goosebumps along my skin.

   Once I step off the descending staircase, I shift Amara in my arms, holding her tightly, squeezing her thighs in my hands as I walk us under the arch into the kitchen.

   Everyone's in the kitchen, Mom and Dad, Dawson with James and Julius, Mason with Keyara, Drake with Moren, Mark with Ashlyn, Liam with Summer. Some are talking, some laughing, some smiling. Everyone's still in their pajamas, I'm probably the only one in normal clothes.

   I passed out with the same clothes on from last night.

   James and Julius are sneaking pieces of bacon off the plate whenever a few new crispy pieces are stacked on the plate. Ashlyn and Mark are holding hands and eating a piece of toast each. Summer and Liam chatting back and forth, both staring at each other with the same look I give to Amara, Summer's hands running up and down Liam's arms. Mason and Keyara talking as Keyara drinks some iced coffee. Drake and Moren being handsy by the pantry, both of their hands on each other, either grasping at skin or just resting on their body. Murmuring things to each other to act like they're actually talking and not just feeling each other up. Mom and dad over by the stove and toaster, manning the bacon and eggs.

   Amara slowly slips from my arms, her socked feet hitting the cold tile gently, grabbing my hand in hers and leading me through the large kitchen. The smell of bacon and eggs has my stomach grumbling.

   Hands pat at my shoulders as Amara leads me through but my eyes are glued to her hips and ass, her shorts so tight it leaves nothing to imagination.

   Not that I need to imagine anyways, I've grasped it all in my hands.

   "Morning King," my mom greets, my dad kissing her cheek as he takes a plate of steaming eggs out of her hand and wanders off into the crowd of people.

   I gently pull my hand away from Amara and make my way over to mom, kissing her cheek "Morning."

   She smiles at me and hands me a plate of bacon, eggs, buttered toast, and some home fries. "Amara dished this up for you, she said she was going to wake you." The plate is warm because of the still steaming breakfast food.

   Turning back to my girlfriend I see her smiling at me, holding a glass of orange juice in her hands.

  Now she's the one taking care of me.

   Her eyes reflect the love I feel in my heart for her as she walks over and grabs my empty hand, gently leading me out of the chaos and into the dining room.

   "Start plating and heading into the dining room!" My mothers voice calls out as Amara sets the glass of orange juice down in my regular seat.

   Plates clink, the sound of silverware being stacked atop plates, chatter getting closer as people start to fill into the dining room with filled plates and glasses of some type of drink.

   Amara smiles at me when I pull my seat out and sit down, she leans down and kisses my forehead "I'll go get you silverware," she whispers in my ear, her warm breath tickling the skin.

   She walks off and Moren walks over to me. "Her ring size is 7 1/2." she murmurs before continuing down the table and setting her plate down next to Drake's and sitting down.

   Moren completed my secret mission.

   Secretly I've been looking at rings for Amara, no matter the cost. I know she wants to wait till after collage to get married but it's never too early to look at diamonds for her.

   I'm just trying to come up with ideas for the perfect ring for her. My bookworm.

   Amara walks back into the dining room and sets a set of silverware down by my plate. She kisses my forehead again and I turn to her, my heart squeezing at her caring actions "Go get something to eat mi amor, you have to eat." The instructions flow off my tongue easily and she nods, a gentle blush of pink covering her cheeks again, drifting down her neck and up to her ears.

   I hope she's feeling better. She seems to be using her left more so her shoulder must be starting to heal up.

   A few minutes later she comes back with a plate of bacon and eggs, toast covered in strawberry jam and a glass of milk.

   I smile at her and she sets her plate down, then her glass and pulls her chair out and sits herself down.

   A frown immediately overtakes my smile "I should pull out your chair for you." Her emerald eyes glance over at me and she giggles "It's okay sugar, I'll survive."

  That's not how it works.

   "So," Dawson interjects our little disagreement "What's happening today?" He asks, stuffing a fork-full of food into his mouth.

   An appointment to get Amara's handprint tattooed over my heart. That's what.

   "I have my tattoo appointment today at noon," I answer him. He nods at me and Liam smiles "Me, Drake, and Mark are taking the girls to the movies,"

   "I'm taking Keyara shopping." Mason states, glancing over at Keyara who's face is a bright pink, directing her shy eyes away from Mason.

   Amara's hand drifts under the table to my arm resting on my thigh, placing hers overtop mine and intertwining out fingers as I take a bite of my bacon.

   Her thumb brushes against the back of my palm, so soft and comforting I could've melted right at her feet, enjoying every moment of melting for her.

   "I could take J and Jul bowling?" Amara suggests and my mom grins "Me and Mr. Grey will tag along," she looks over at Dawson "Why don't you come with us?" Dawson smiles and nods.

   My dad chuckles, smirking at Amara "Be prepared to lose. I'm the best bowler in this family." He states proudly and Amara smiles "I'm sure you are sir, I've only ever been bowling once in my life."

   She turns to me, a comforting look in those beautiful emerald eyes "Are you okay with that?" She asks me softly, gently tapping her thumb against the back of my hand, taking a bite out of her toast.

   My head nods quickly "Of course baby, just call me if you need anything, I'll be back by 5 pm hopefully." I inform her and she smiles brightly, those eyes sparkling brightly.

  I love seeing her this happy .

   I love her. 

   With the nod of her head we both go back to eating breakfast, both chatting randomly with different people. Our fingers still interlocked with one another's.

   For someone who drank way too much I don't feel that horrible other than the subsided headache.

   Amara's laugh drifts through the dining room, the sound music to my ears and soothing the painful headache.

   I take a sip of orange juice, my eyes drifting over towards Amara's empty ring finger.

   That has to get filled.

~~~~

   Amara dips down, helping James with the zipper on his sweatshirt jacket while mom and dad slip on their shoes and Dawson shrugs his sweatshirt over his shoulders.

   "Thanks Pretty lady," James thanks Amara, she smiles at him, leaning forward and kissing his cheek before pushing up off the floor and standing up.

   James's face heats up, a goofy smile on his face "Get your shoes on J," Amara instructs softly, giggling as he nods and bolts over to his sneakers.

   Julius walks up behind her and rests his head against her right hip, looking up at her with his purple eyes. "Will you help me bowl?" She asks, Julius raised his hand and started playing with the fabric of my sweatshirt she once again stole from our closet.

   He nods his head, a soft smile on Amara's pretty lips "Of course!" He jumps excitedly and runs over to mom, tugging on her shirt "Amara wants me to help her bowl!"

   My mom laughs happily "You better be a good teacher!" Julius grins and James pouts, crossing his arms "Why can't I help?" Amara smiles "You can help too J. I'll need all the help I can get!" The twins smile, standing impatiently.

   My dad comes back with some cash in his hand and hands it to Mason "For the movies," he says, walking over to me.

   He smiles at me, handing me a few hundreds "For her promise ring." He whispers quietly to me, glancing over his shoulder as Amara bends down and picks Julius up in her arms, resting him on her hip as mom helps James with the laces on his sneakers.

   It's really not going to be a promise ring. It's more of an early wedding band. I don't need my dads money but he insisted on giving me some, but when I want to get her a real engagement ring I have to pay for that myself. 

   Either way I'm not worried.

   Giving him a nod and stuffing the money into my pocket. He grins and pats my shoulder, walking over to mom and kissing her softly. Dawson grabs his keys off the key hook "Who do you boys want to ride with?" Dawson asks the twins.

   James quickly sprints over to Amara, clinging onto her leg as Julius grins "Amara!" They both call, making everyone laugh.

   Dawson chuckles "Alright, go with Mama and help her get your car seats out of Mason's car." Amara sets Julius down and they sprint for the garage door, cheering happily.

   Mom and dad follow the boys with smiles on their faces.

Once the door closes behind the boys and my parents I quickly grab Amara's waist, yanking her into the living room and crashing our lips together.

She quickly kissed me back, her hands fisting my t-shirt tightly. Her lips fit with mine like a puzzle piece, her hips made for my hands to rest on.

My tongue pokes out, running along her bottom lip for access. She responds instantly, opening her mouth while her hands find my hair.

   My tongue dives into her mouth, the sweet taste of her all over my tongue, filling my senses. She whimpers against my mouth and my left hand cups the back of her head, pressing my lips harder into hers.

   Her fingers scrape against my scalp, her fingers repeatedly combing through my hair as her tongue tangles with mine. The heat of her mouth sinking into my every nerve, fueling the beat of my heart.

I need my fill for when she's gone.

My hands glide up her sweatshirt, her skin warm and hot under my palms, her soft skin scraping against my rough hands.

Her chest vibrates with a hum, her tongue licking at mine, twirling around in a dance as she wraps her arms around my neck, pushing farther up into me.

"Really? It's gross to just make out with your girl anywhere in the house." Dawson groans from my left.

Amara gasps, pulling back from my lips with a pop, my hands slipping out from her shirt and my throat scratches with a groan, reaching out for Amara again.

Dawson rolls his eyes "How much longer?" He asks, checking his expensive Rolex watch then back up at me.

"5 minutes," I answer, my hands finally grasping Amara and drawing her back into my chest, my hand cupping the back of her head as my lips touch hers again. Our tongues meet as though we never stopped.

Dawson grumbles something under his breath but then walks off, the sound of his shoes fading.

My fingers find the ends of her hair, my knuckles instantly wrapping around the soft chocolate brown and tugging down. She lifts her head, pushing her lips harder into mine, our tongues fighting dominantly.

My lungs burn at the lack of air and when Amara pulls back gasping for air I latch my lips onto her neck. She pants against me, her pulse thumping wildly under my lips.

I scrape my teeth along the soft skin and she gasps, her arms encircling my neck and holding me at her neck.

Her little pants have me pushing further, sucking the skin harshly between my teeth to mark her as mine. A breathy moan leaves her and then I slowly draw back, staring down at her as she looks up at me impatiently but a little annoyed.

A red mark starts to form on her soft tan skin, the mark my teeth made clearly visible from a few good feet away.

She placed her hands on her hips, lifting her chin at me "I have the necklace you gave me on. Your sweatshirt on. Your name tattooed behind my left ear. Your handwriting under my boob. Your handprint on my ass with your name under your handprint. And you still have to give me a hickey?" She asks, her chest rising and falling quickly as she tries to catch her breath. Her freckles dusted in a pretty pink.

It's true. She's wearing the gold necklace I gave her, the light making it glint and glitter beautifully around her slim neck. Her hair pulled up in a high ponytail revealing my name clearly tattooed behind her ear in dark black, the ink standing out on her tan skin. My sweatshirt draped and hanging on her body, her legs covered in some skin tight white leggings and a pair of black sneakers on her feet. Her glasses rest perfectly on her nose, the transparent white allowing her emerald eyes to be the main attention.

I nod my head "Yeah." Her stern face breaks with a smile as she pushes up on her toes and gives me a little peck, patting my chest over my heart where the tattoo will go.

"I'll see you later okay sugar?" She asks and I nod, bending down and kissing her cheeks, then forehead, then nose. Her skin is a magnet to my lips, any time I see some I want to kiss it.

The soft touch of my lips to the skin on her jaw has goosebumps covering her body, a delighted shiver running through her as I raise my mouth to her ear. My breaths fans over the ticklish skin, my teeth nipping at the lobe "I'm taking you out to dinner again tonight, be ready by 6:00 pm okay mi amor?" I ask, my voice low and husky.

"Formal?" She asks quietly, her voice soft and shaky with each breath. But she's not scared.

I draw her earlobe gently between my teeth, enjoying every fucking moment when she shivers against me, "Yeah."

When I pull back her teeth are sunken into her bottom lip, her neck dusting pink along with her cheeks, the glasses illuminating the pink tauntingly.

A chuckle leaves me and she blinks before nodding, quickly kissing my lips just in time before Dawson's voice rings out from the garage, "Amara!"

"Goodbye, I love you sugar. I'll text you when we get there," her lips touch my cheek before she turns and walks away, her hips swaying and ass jiggling as she goes.

"I love you Bookworm." I tell her before she walks around the wall and out of my sight.

I hate to see her go.

But love to watch her leave.

That ass.

Mmmmmm.

I want to bite it.

Chew on her gorgeous skin. Taste every fucking inch of her that I possibly can. I would swallow her whole if I could. Everything about her makes me blush, or get hard. Most of the time it's both.

God I love that women.

And she loves me.

Fuck, my life couldn't get any better.

~~~~

The sound of my car door slamming behind me is whisked away in the wind as I walk towards the ring store, and idea of what I want to get her already in my mind.

Her engagement ring will compare to nothing though.

This ring is just temporary. So everyone knows she's off limits.

My Bookworm.

My amore.

My Amara.

A smile pulls at my face at the thought of her finger finally filled with temporary diamonds, just so everyone knows she's off limits and is mine.

Amara Grey. Has a beautiful ring to it.

Reaching the glass door I pull it open, stepping inside the expensive store. There's display cases all over the store, the walls a darker white with pictures of hands with the diamond rings plastered all over the walls. Quotes of love painted above ring cases. Happy employees walking around and talking with some other people who are in the store.

A shorter man dressed in black dress pants and white button down shirt spots me and grins, quickly exiting the counter and walking towards me.

"Welcome to Diamonds and Jewels! I'm Jerry, how may I assist?" He asks in a perky voice. His voice kind of reminds me of Emma's. It's not a nice sound.

Sticking my hands in my jean pockets I scan the store then looking back down at him, actually now nervous "I need a diamond band, size 7 1/2." I tell him and he nods, putting a hand on my back and leading me farther into the dustless store. The amount of lights shining onto the glass cases of diamonds has glints of blinding light shooting everywhere.

Mainly men are in here, scanning the cases and fiddling with their fingers, staring at the options.

Man, the further I go into the store the more nervous I feel.

What if she doesn't like it?

Jerry pats my back "Here's the options, we have size 7 1/2 in every band. Call me over when you've made your decision and I'll ring you up!" He states happily before turning and walking off. Leaving me alone in the store.

   This is going to take a little while.

~~~~

My eyes hurt from staring at diamonds for so long.

I think my vision is starting to blur.

Why is it so hard to pick out a temporary ring!?

I rub my eyes, sighing. No wonder guys come in here and stay for so long. It's so hard to find the right ring.

Goddamn.

If I don't find the right ring soon I'm going to be late for my tattoo appointment and me and Amara's date tonight.

I will not miss either one.

But I planned on giving her the ring at dinner.

Ugh!

Ring shopping is hard.

"Hey man, how's it going?" Jerry pats my back, startling me out of my deep thought. He chuckles "Having a hard time?" Feeling tired and defeated I nod my head, running a hand down my face.

He grins "We just got a new diamond band in a few minutes ago, want to take a look?" He asks. With a heavy sigh I nod.

What's a few more diamonds?

He walks off and I follow, not even bothering to wait for him to hustle me along.

Why can't they turn the lights down in here? I'm getting another fucking horrible headache.

He walks behind the counter and pulls out a velvet box, pushing it across the glass towards me. "I think it might be the one you've been looking for," he suggests, nodding his head towards the box.

I reach out and grab the small box, pulling it off the counter. The velvet is soft in my hands, rubbing softly against my palms. Gently pushing the top up it slowly retracts, revealing a beautiful 5 Carrot Round Eternity Band.

I've seen these before. And they are breathtaking.

Images of Amara with the ring on her ring finger flash through my mind.

This is the ring for her for right now.

This is the ring I want to see her wearing until I design one of my own.

"I'm guessing that's the one." His perky voice speaks up and the images of Amara with this ring disappear, my head lifting to look at Jerry.

I nod my head at him "Yeah, for now," he raises a brow at me, walking over to the register and typing some things in.

"For now?" He questions, checking the bottom of the velvet box. I nod my head, he glances at me "Do you mind me asking how old you are?"

My shoulders lift in a shrug "19, but I turned 19 not to long ago, maybe a good 3 months." I state and Jerry pauses in his movements, staring at me wide-eyed.

A chuckle leaves me "I'm going to wait till after college to actually propose. But I want people to know she's mine." Jerry grins, shaking his head with a smile at my explication.

"She's one lucky girl then." My chest swells with pride and a smile grows on my face.

I can't believe I've never smiled before Amara. Now all I do at the thought of her is smile. She destroyed me in the best way possible.

   He takes the register dramatically and looks up at me "That's $9,995 for your total, cash or card?" He asks, sounding a little breathless like just saying all that was a mouthful.

   I pull out a stack of hundreds, dropping it down onto the counter "Cash."

   Jerry gasps, quickly taking the stack of hundreds and going through them "I've never seen someone pay cash before!" He stated loudly and some people looked over in question.

   His lips moved as he counted the cash, finally finishing counting and popping the register open, going for a 5 dollar bill.

   I shake my head "Keep the change." I state, grabbing the velvet box and slipping it into my pocket, giving Jerry a curt nod.

   He nods back with a smile, waving "Have a good day!" Is the last thing I hear before the door closes behind me.

   My nerves start to die down the farther I walk from the store, pulling the black velvet box from my pocket and popping it open, just admiring what will soon be on her finger.

My phone buzzes and I quickly pull it out, seeing a message from Amara.

——————————————————————————
Mi Amor❤️: Hey sugar, we just
arrived.

Me: Okay baby, thank you. See
you tonight for our date. I love
you ❤️

Mi Amor❤️: Okay sugar. I love you ,
have a good appointment baby❤️

Me: I will amor, have fun bowling

Mi Amor❤️: I will, I'll text you
later

Me: Alright my love

————————————————————————

Stuffing my phone back into my pocket I grab my keys out, unlocking my Bugatti and opening the door, sliding in and setting the ring box on the consul.

The engine roars to life when I stick the keys in and turn the car on, music blaring through the speakers which I quickly quiet down with my headache.

1:32 pm. Okay, I should be good.

I shift into reverse, quickly backing out of my parking spot and shifting into drive, speeding through the parking lot towards the main roads.

I can't be late for this appointment. I can't wait another minute to get her handprint tattooed on me.

——————————————————————————
Yes, Kingston is actually now 19. He turned 19 a day after he met Amara so don't be alarmed that she didn't know about his birthday!

What do you think will happen at dinner?

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