—-
"What are you doing...?" You groaned and rubbed your eye, you saw Eren sitting at your desk leaning over with a screwdriver to your phone.
"Go to sleep. You need rest,"
"Yeah and so do you," you turned and got out of bed to get a closer look at what he was doing.
"No, I don't-"
"Eren you pinky promised. Shouldn't you be laying with Mila?" You advised and stood next to him at your desk.
"I told you I'm a liar...I'm going to upgrade your phone," he says casually and puts the back piece back on.
"So you just admitted that you lied about your promise?"
"I never said that," he denied and turned his head to you.
You were confused, beyond confused at what he was saying.
"But you just said, "I told you I'm a liar" after I brought up your promise to me. So do you intend on breaking it?"
"I never intended on keeping it. Here," he handed you back your phone and stood up from the desk, he pushed the chair in and you stood there waiting for him to tell you he was joking.
"Is that a joke? Can you explain it to me, I don't get it?" You forced a laugh but he just stared at you blankly too.
"I'm not joking...now that we've cleared that up can you tell me where he hid my weed?" Eren asked and took a step closer to you.
"Are you serious right now?"
"Yeah, if I want to sleep I need my shit," he scratched his head and you wondered if you were dreaming.
He was acting as if you didn't make it clear that you had his health in your best interest, he just didn't care. You were scared by how easily he lied to you, which made it believable at that.
"I don't know where he hid it-"
"Y/n just tell me. Please I don't want to do the back and forth with you." He groaned and stood in front of you, your hand out still from getting your phone from him but being more focused on the very words coming out of his mouth.
"I said I don't know where he hid it. It probably isn't even here...but-"
He sighed again and walked past you quickly before slamming the door shut. You heard his feet hitting the steps and you just stood there in disbelief at the person you were talking to, it couldn't have been Eren...right? Had you been completely ignoring that side of him when he showed you or was there something else going on?
You heard the front door close loudly, his eagerness frightened you a little. You honestly didn't think it was that serious but rather him openly admitting to not planning on keeping his promise from the start.
You decided to go check on Mila since his mind was very clearly preoccupied, you went into his room and saw her asleep on his bed, she was sleeping at the end of the bed for some reason and you decided to sit in the room to keep an eye on her.
You sat down on the bed quietly and thought about him, waiting. You waited for him to return, the longer you waited the more you regret not figuring out where he was going or going after him. You pulled your knees up to your chest on the bed and rested your head on your arms.
An hour had passed, maybe two or three in the morning you weren't really sure. Eren still wasn't back and you were more worried than before, you got up and went to go see if Carlos happened to stop by or be downstairs since he was always in and out.
You checked and saw him walking back and forth in the middle of a phone call, you walked down the steps and tapped him on the shoulder.
"Can you stay here with Mila until I get back?" You asked and he nodded before continuing his conversation, you grabbed your shoes and your keys.
Eren had your car in his driveway but you never had
to use it since he mostly drove you everywhere.
——
You knew of one place you may be able to find him and went there. The same place he once helped you, you saw him sitting on the curb of the closed-off road from before eating french fries. He just sat there, it was cold out so you could see your breath in the air as you approached him with your arms crossed over your chest.
The bag of fries was still full, it appeared that he wasn't even eating them. You sat next to him, he was dead silent and you couldn't even hear him breathing.
"Eren?" Your voice shuddered and your knees were close to your chest when you sat down on the curb with him.No reply, he just stared down at the French fries.
"I smoked,"
"I know." You answered.
"And I lied."
"I know..."
"I don't plan on stopping. Smoking helps me think." He says again and starts crinkling the bag of fries between his fingers.
"Think about what?"
He thought about it before he answered, you could sense a sort of sadness from him. A type of sadness you never associated with him before, it began to sprinkle outside but leaving wasn't even on your mind.
"The night my mom was taken, I remember...I remember the feeling of my shoulders being sliced and the look on my mom's face when she saw me," he said and looked down at the road and bit the inside of his cheek.
"Your shoulder-"
"They cut into the top of my shoulder to prevent me from doing anything, I watched her get taken before passing out from blood loss," he answered and finally managed to make the effort to make eye contact with you.
Lost for words, all you did was stare and swallow down all the utter disbelief you got from him. The night was silent, there were e sounds of cars but all you could hear were the words coming out of his mouth and the pure numbness in his tone. Speaking like he relived that moment every day and used smoking as an escape, you didn't know whether he meant it helped him think back to the situation or help him think of other things but either way you felt terrible. You'd grown this attachment to Eren, you've had sex with him but that wasn't as intimate as these moments right here. Eren in the flesh and bones, he was telling you things and emotions about himself that probably only you knew.
Levi knew bits and pieces but Eren's liking toward you allowed him to be more open. Parts of you felt like you owed him some sort of returned deep intimate feeling but what you didn't know is that it was never like that.
"Do you want a fry?" He offered and placed them in front of your face.
"No, I wan-"
"I don't want to talk about it. I told you because you deserve to know and I trust you but that's it." He claimed clearly, you held your tongue just this once and nodded.
"You trust me?"
"I trust you more than anyone." He answered and reached to the opposite side of you and grabbed the beer next to him to take a sip.
Once he did, it began raining heavier little by little. You weren't sure what to say but neither did he, he was just blurting things to you because he was high and completely checked out in his mind. Water began to collect on both of your faces, water droplets running down his hair and yours.
"I don't trust myself," he said and stared straight forward at the singular street lamp post that was working but flickering.
"Why not...?"
"Because I'm a terrible person," he sighed loudly and you looked at the collected beads of water on his eyelashes.
"I don't think that." You tried to give him some sense of comfort and even rested your head against his shoulder, placing your hand on top of his arm.
"That's the problem," he confessed and there was a long pause of silence between the two of you and even you doubted yourself for a moment.
"There is one promise I'd like to make known that I'll always keep." He announced and slightly sighed before turning his head to you with his soft eyes and rested face.
"Which is?"
"I'll always protect you. Whatever happens to me doesn't matter, don't ever question your safety when it's in my hands." He assured calmly, he stared you directly in the eye
"Whatever happens to you? What are you talking about?"
He doesn't reply but instead reaches over and suddenly locks his hand into yours. He stared down at your hand for a moment, you could see his eyes watered a bit but that was it.
"Eren? What's going on-"
"I promise." He smiles at you and cute you off.
You reached into your pocket and pulled out the pill bottle given to you by Levi, you wanted him to take them and weren't sure what all of what he said just meant.
He looked down at the pills in your hand and grabbed them, he opened them and you watched him take them. You smiled slightly of relief, you wanted to be there for him in any way you could.
That's when you got a text, Eren stood up and stuck his hand out for you to grab. His dry hand despite the black jacket he was wearing being soaked, he looked tired most of the time but there was this sense of energy you got from his eyes when he looked at you. High out of his mind but he still had that flicker in him.
A buzz in your pocket directed your attention elsewhere. A texted you'd do anything to not see ever again. The pure fear and terror you received from a man you once thought you loved.
Armin:
I want to meet with you...just you. If you tell or bring Eren, I'll report Eren's money laundering and get him arrested.
You stared at the message, you looked at his hand and hesitantly grabbed it. Your brows furrowed, millions of thoughts sorted themselves out in your mind and Eren could sense it just by how you grabbed your hand. Reading you're was an open book to him, it was easy...not simple. Simplicity and you were not even allowed in the same sentence, to him you were a series of books, a continuation of beauty. Something he could read but more and more peaches and series would continue to be added because you just meant that much to him.
"Is something wrong?" He questioned and you shook your head instantly.
"I want you to be okay," you state right after standing up and deeply breathing to calm yourself from being visibly upset. Now wasn't the time nor place to say anything.
"Did Levi give you some sort of warning about me?"
"Can we just go back?" You brushed off; very obviously avoiding the question to prevent any further conflict for now.
He looked at you and nodded, you both began walking and you felt his wet hand lock with yours as you walked together. The rain splashed against both of your shoes after each step, the two of you walking hand in hand with your cold fingers locked and simply because he liked being close to you. He pulled the hood up on your jacket to cover the rain from wetting your hair, you walked toward the crosswalk together where cars were going into ongoing traffic and Eren looked both ways as he waited.
You stood next to him, calmed now that he was with you and you looked at the reflection of red street lights in the puddles of rain on the concrete.
You hoped that things would be more resolved in the morning. That's all you could do.
Hope.
——
You saw that it was around four in the morning when you both finally made it home, when he opened the bedroom door Mila came running out and grabbed his leg tightly.
"Eren!" She cheered happily and you yawned and pushed the door to your bedroom open.
"Mila!" He greeted just as enthusiastically.
You smiled in their direction softly and set your phone away from your bed. You left them be and wandered off to bed yourself, you weren't sure where your relationship stood with Eren but nothing thinking about it was the most mind-settling.
The text kept you from falling asleep as easy as you would've liked, you spent the rest of the time in bed wondering whether or not you should've told Armin. If anything, if he knew that you knew about the money laundering then that meant that he was listening in somehow. You needed to find a way to talk to Eren in a location where listening in wasn't even a possibility.
After another hour and a half of thinking in bed, you got it. You knew what to do while still protecting Eren.
—-
"Hello!" A soft child-like voice greeted you right in the face, Mila was crawled on top of you and waiting for you to acknowledge her.
"Hi, Mila..."
"Mila!" Eren came in and picked her up off you, he tossed her over his shoulder and you got up to him in a white tank top and pink cartoon pajamas.
"Put me down! I want her to do my hair!" Mila hit Eren's back and kicked her feet as a protest.
"What's wrong with how I do your hair?" He asked in an offended manner.
"You do pigtails. I don't like pigtails,"
"Since when don't you like pigtails Mila?"
"Since forever," she complained and Eren lowered her into the ground where she ran back over to you and grabbed your hand to pull you out of bed.
"Sorry. I was trying to put her shoes on and she ran away," Eren apologized but you shook your head and moved the cover out the way.
"It's fine. Where is she going?"
"Carlos is taking her to see Jean. He's okay...I figure I should stay here, Jean gets awkward in these situations, "Eren answered before turning around to leave the room.
"When your done...can I talk to you for a sec?" You requested and he nodded on his way out your door, you grabbed what you needed off your dresser and slid it into the palm of your hand where you kept it until Eren came back into your room and you led him elsewhere.
There's no way in hell you'd snitch on Eren and there's definitely no way you'd let Armin snitch either. You had a plan and getting him to the room next to his gym was exactly where you were taking him.
"Where are we going?"
"It's a surprise," you responded and opened the door to the room, you shut it behind him and immediately turned to shut the door behind you.
The anticipation and worry started to build up, if this didn't work then you'd be sending Eren off to jail. You took a deep breath and turned around, he was leaned up against the desk.
"What's wr-" you cut off him off by standing directly in front of him and crashing your lips onto his. You slid your hand over to his and gave him a note, it was short and clear because all you needed was to make it sound like you and Eren weren't reading a note.
You felt him grab it and as soon as you did you trailed your kisses down to his neck, sucking the corner and he moved one hand to your lower back and the other he used to read the note.
He started heavily breathing and groaning when you bit his neck a little, at the start of the note you told him to make it sound like you two were doing something else. Obviously, if Armin really was listening in, his obsession with you would cause him to be disgusted by the sounds of you with another man.
You gave him time to read the note as you kissed along his neck waiting for him to finish reading. You heard him slide the note into his pocket and plant both hands on your waist, he moved quickly and placed you on top of the desk, slamming you there.
"When the hell did he text you that?!" Eren whispered harshly and you stared up at him wide-eyed.
Without another word he reached into his pocket and started playing something out loud on full volume, porn.
"Tell me." He demanded as the sounds of moans spilled from his phone.
"Last night...when we were together," you answered and he continued to tower over the top of you.
You could see him clenching his jaw as he stared at you, you wanted to know what he was thinking but then again it was probably something along the lines of hurting someone.
"Do you...want to go see him?" Eren asked in a softer tone but no longer a whisper.
"What? No, of course not." You denied and leaned up.
He nodded slowly and backed off the top of you, he stood straight up and you slid off the desk. He just walked away, just like that. You stood there for a moment after he grabbed his phone and left but you weren't sure what that really meant for him.
Sometimes you wondered what he thought about, those moments of silence where all he did was stare at you...what was he thinking?
You started to walk back upstairs when you received another text, you thought maybe it was Mikasa or Sasha but it wasn't.
Armin:
You told him. I told you not to.
Stopped walking completely, you stood there on the steps with your phone in your hand. You shuddered in fear and quickly turned around.
"Eren!" You shouted and ran right back down the steps.
Eren was outside in his backyard, standing near the pool and talking to one of his guards but you ran out and interrupted anyway.
"What's wrong?"
"He knows! I don't know how he knows but he does and he's going to get you arrested!" You turned your phone toward him and Eren stared at the message, his guard stood there awkwardly.
"It's okay. I'm not going to get arrested y/n,"
"How can you be so sure?!"
"I can't. I just said that to reassure you..." he muttered and shooed off the guard, you were panicking and breathing loudly and deeply.
"Calm down. Nothing is going to happen to you-"
"I'm not worried about me I'm worried about you! Let me worry for you for once without you trying to make it seem like I'm the only one at risk!" You shouted at him and he remained calm and just kept his arms folded over his chest.
He dropped his arms and wrapped them around you tightly, holding you close to him.
"I don't think you want an actual answer. Sounds like you just want comfort," he whispered and you just let him at this point.
His chest was still always so warm for some reason, you held onto that and wrapped your arms around him too.
"What are-"
"Here," he took his arms off you and pulled something out of his pocket to give to you.
He grabbed your hand and put it in a cupping position, he placed a bracelet in your hand and folded your hand closed over it.
"Let's go play some video games." He suggested and started walking toward the house again, you followed behind him until you both sat down on the couch and he acted as collected as possible.
He didn't address anything but when playing the game you saw him glance over at his phone a bit, Carlos was upstairs making phone calls that you could hear all the way down there.
You kept the bracelet in your pocket, when you tried to put it on when the game was paused Eren shook his head at you. You didn't question it right away but you should've, you kept it in your pocket and played the game with him for about an hour. He was so fun to play games with because even if you'd don't know what you were doing he would guide you to the right quest or play to act on in the game without embarrassing you.
The two of you were laughing and smiling while playing the game and talking in between. A sudden knock ruined all of it. All it took was the knock.
"Eren Jaeger! We have a warrant to search your home!"
Eren immediately put his hand over your mouth and pushed you down flat on the couch, slamming your back onto the couch. He set his controller aside and pressed himself on top of you while your eyes went wide.
"You're okay...don't panic." He whispered and Carlos came walking down the steps.
He stayed like that for a minute, still not replying to the cops at his door and they shot a single bullet through the window in the living room and Eren easily moved you over onto the floor and remained on top of you. The bullet made a hole in the wall above you next to a framed painting Eren had as your heart heated out of your chest rapidly, you knew he could feel it the way he was on top of you. Except it wasn't beating because he was on top of you, it was beating because of a single bullet that would soon send shivers up and down your body like crazy.
"I'm going to have Carlos take you out of here. Please don't argue with me about it...please," he whispered and continued to cover your mouth.
"Take her. She can't be here." Eren turned his head and demanded Carlos who was standing casually behind the couch like nothing happened.
"Understood." Eren carefully got off the top of you while the banging on his door from the police continued, he walked you over to Carlos and Carlos grabbed your hand.
"I'll be right behind you. Don't worry," Eren nodded his head at you and squeezed your hand once more just before Carlos started dragging you away quickly down the steps.
"Y/n...I hope you like your bracelet." Eren said just before Carlos and you were about to be at the end of the steps, you saw Eren standing over and he smiled at you...softly.
"Let's go," Carlos opened the second door in the room next to the gym, he quickly walked you to the back door and you didn't resist but you wanted Eren to be the one leading you out.
Carlos took you out the back door quickly and into his car that was parked there, away from the backyard fence. He drove off quickly and took a background that was just behind Eren's house, you were trying not to think of the worst but that was practically impossible.
"Where are we going?"
"I'm taking you to an amusement park," Carlos answered and drove fast, very fast.
"W-"
"Please don't ask me any questions. I'm not like Eren, I will say more than I'm supposed to on accident." Carlos confessed and sighed as he drove you and you fumbled with your fingers.
"Sorry...is he going to be okay?"
"Of course, Eren has escaped the cop's grasp multiple times. They may have a warrant but Eren has a built-in fingerprint on every keyboard so if they try to type it will automatically delete every file, server, and video he has on any platform linked to that fingerprint." Carlos answered
"You're lying to me."
"I'm not," he quickly denied and looked in the mirror to make sure no cops were failing him.
"Yes, you are."
"Fine! Eren...he-uh warned me about this happening and told me what to do if it did happen." Carlos shook his head and you noticed he was driving you in a more northern part of the main city.
"What? What did he tell you to do?"
"He said if the police ever got involved then...you are not to be around him anymore...after this, you will lose all contact with him completely. His number will no longer be accessible and I will work for you for the time being...as in by your aside twenty-four seven." Carlos said and you suddenly stopped the airflow leaving you, stopping yourself from breathing because you were just so convinced that it was a joke at this point.
"What? No...Eren said he'd protect me and how will he do that if he's not even here-?"
"This is him protecting you. He knows his chances of surviving are at least half then yours because of what he does. He says he never meant to get you involved-"
"Stop the car."
"I can't do that," Carlos said and you were truly convinced that Eren meant to protect as in being around you as well.
He was someone you'd grown to love to be around, the cartoon pajamas, the fries, the video games, and his instinct to protect you no matter the situation. Whether the situation meant cutting off his best friend or comforting you when you felt like all was to come to an end. He was there for you. Always. That was more than enough that anyone had ever given you. It wasn't even fair to say over the past months, the past years, he's always had your back and knowing that he's liked you all this time made you feel horrible for ranting to him about Armin those years ago. Even when you were with another man...your happiness was always in his best interest. Always.
And right now.
You were losing all that.