*VERY LONG CHAPTER*
-Jade-
Hours later, just before the break of dawn, Loren steered their small party off the road and into the woods. No path laid before them, yet he guided them as easily as if there had been one. Jade leaned her upper body out to the right. Leaning, and partly hanging, out from her seat behind Stroem to get a glimpse of her guard. Loren appeared almost untouched. In the bleak moonlight she could not detect any wounds on his body or any other signs that he was hurt. Not counting the cut on his cheek which she knew was there. What she could see, however, was stiffness in his posture and how his eyes kept watch over their surroundings.
He doesn't think we're safe yet. She thought.
Jade threw a nervous glance over her shoulder to see if anyone was following them. Someone who might have seen them get off the main road. Beside from bushels moving with a low rustle, leaves whispering softly in the night breeze and the soft thuds of their mounts' steps, there were no sounds. No one was there but the three of them.
Soon enough, a sea of tree trunks hid them from potential snooping eyes from the main road. Still, Jade kept looking back just to be sure. She could not shake the feeling of eyes burning in the back of her neck. Every time she looked over her shoulder, the main road was harder to spot than the last time she had looked.
Despite nothing happening, she unknowingly held her breath and expected Ulf and his men to come running out of the folige around them. Roaring with their blades raised high in the air. A dark feeling brewed in her gut, hissing in her mind that their pursuers had already caught up with them, waiting in the darkness. Jade imagined them lukring in the shadows, laughing quietly and mocking her for thinking that she could get away. Ridiculing her for feeling even remotely safer than in Rowan's camp.
I can't get away... can I? She wondered to herself and quickly brushed away a tear from her cheek. Stop crying. She scolded herself and forced the thoughts of Ulf and his men away. It was bad enough that glimpses of her captivity in Rowan's camp were flashing before her eyes when she blinked, or whenever her mind went empty for the fraction of a second. Images of Gorm crawling closer caused her hands to clench hard around Stroem's waist, and her breath got caught in her throat.
The guard turned his head to the right, and gave her a reassuring look over her shoulder. "Do not fear, your grace. We-"
"We need to split up." Loren suddenly declared while reining his horse in. Jade swallowed and directed her gaze towards Loren. His gaze was still searching their surroundings as if he had not spoken at all. The sound of his steady voice numbed the dark feeling in her gut, and she could take a deep breath again.
Stroem quickly led his horse up alongside Loren's. "Split up?" He protested quietly, leaning towards his superior so he didn't have to raise his voice. Loren's horse took a couple of steps forward, and turned, so he was facing them instead.
"You will head back to camp." Loren commanded and twitched his head to the left and while looking at Jade. Signaling for her to get off Stroem's horse and up onto his. "I do not believe we will ever be safe in these lands. If we split up, then Rowan's men will have to do the same if they are on our trail. I think it will buy us time." He continued.
"Head back? Without you? Without the queen? Where are you going?" The questions poured out of Stroem. Meanwhile, Jade slid down from Stroem's horse onto the ground on wobbly legs that felt numb. She then hurried over to Loren. He removed his boot from his stirrup so she could use it to get up. They clasped arms and he pulled her up in a seamless motion. She was sitting behind him before Stroem had finished talking.
"I am taking the queen back north." Loren replied and looked over his shoulder, checking to see if she was sitting properly. When Jade hade given him a quick nod, he turned his attention back to Stroem.
It sounds so simple. Like we aren't being hunted like animals. She thought.
A part of her wished, even though she knew it was stupid, that it truly would be easy to go back north. To go home. She longed for the safety of being behind stone walls, and that her child would get to grow in peace. However, it definitely would not be as easy as she wished. It had not been easy the last time she was on the run with Loren. Something deep within, told her that this time, would be worse. Much worse.
"When you arrive at camp, find the king. Do not speak to anyone until you have given him the news that the queen is safe." Loren instructed while ignoring the obvious confusion spreading across Stroem's face. "As safe as she can be." He corrected himself and cleared his throat after a second. "I will send a messenger upon our immediate arrival at the castle."
Stroem let out a skeptical sigh, watching Loren with doubt glowing in his eyes. "You cannot possibly think that you can get her back on your own? How are you planning-"
"There is no time for this." Loren cut him off firmly while looking around them as if someone was eavesdropping on them. "We do not know how close they are."
Jade scanned their surroundings immediately but could not see or hear anything except the same sounds from before, apart from her guards' quiet argument. The feeling in her gut was back and even harder to ignore now. It screamed at her that they needed to leave.
What is he looking for? Did he hear something? Someone? She wondered to herself as Loren stayed quiet for a while. Did he share her suspicion that someone was following them?
Just as she was about to ask him, Stroem caught her attention. He cleared his throat uncomfortably, like he was about to object and in doing so offend his brother in arms. "With all due respect... the queen would be safer if the two of us-"
"Stroem." Loren cut him short again, now with a darker tone in his voice. "This is not the first time I have been on the run with her grace... Alone, might I add... Do not worry about her safety." Loren said, letting Stroem know that he was not staying long enough for anything else to be discussed.
He gave their horse a nudge with his legs.
"Ride. Now. Stay off the roads for as long and as much as you can. The roads will be crawling with Rowan's men and they will not let anyone past before having asked about us. If you are unlucky, someone will recognize you. Disguise yourself, and if needed; bury or hide your armor. Buy new clothes and try to blend in. If they do not recognize you then, and they ask for the queen... tell them you are a wanderer and have not heard of or seen her. If you speak a word of her, under torture or for coin... I will find you and kill you before your king does." He breathed darkly and gripped the reigns hard. The sound of the leather screaming in his hands was the loudest around them. "Do you understand?"
Jade blinked, shock spread throughout her body. Did he say that he will kill him? She did not have time to react before Loren's horse set off at his command. Stroem nodded in acceptance as they rode past and before he could speak the words "good luck", Loren had given his horse a second command and it sprinted through the woods. She threw one last look over her shoulder and watched as Stroem took a deep breath before turning around and heading the opposite way.
"How long will it take us to get back home?" She asked Loren after a minute or two.
"Longer than you think, your grace." He replied dryly. "Please keep your voice down and try to speak as little as possible. We cannot let Rowan's men hear us."
"You have to tell me something. Please." She whispered and was forced to hold onto him tighter when he pushed the horse even harder. "How long will the journey up north take us?"
"We are currently behind Rowan's borders and a long way from our own realm." Loren answered quietly but with harshness in his tone. Seeming to hate speaking the name of his king's enemy aloud, even in a whisper. "I am ashamed to admit it, but I do not know these lands well enough to know exactly were we need to go. I fear we will not be safe until we cross the border. Furthermore, we cannot use the main roads as freely as we need to, so I all I can tell you is that it will take a long time to even get over the border, and longer yet before we are safe and sound back up north."
"How did we reach Rowan's realm already? We rode for no more than a night?" She pondered aloud. She felt Loren tense up all over before he answered her.
"Two and a half days." He filled her in. "I think."
He thinks? Jade wondered to herself. A knot of worry built up in her gut.
"No, I-"
"You were not awake for most of the journey." He interrupted her. "We rode for Skall's Bridge but did not get there before they caught up with us..." She grimaced at the unknown name of whatever place he was speaking of. It sounded like a place you never wanted to see. "We only made that stop because you were so cold that I feared for your life, not counting whatever wounds you might have that I have yet to find out about." Even thought she sat behind him, she could see him grind his teeth in frustration and anger about her bruises and injuries.
Jade clenched her jaws and decided not to bother her guard with anymore questions. He had enough on his mind and she had the memory of how difficult she'd been the last time, fresh in mind.
They rode until midday before they stopped at a small little farm house. Even though the sun was high, it did not warm her frozen body. The days seemed to grow colder even though spring was almost here. She looked around and tried to comprehend how she was on the run again within a year of the last time. How many times would she go through this?
She stayed on the horse while Loren dismounted and went up to the farm house and knocked on the door. A second later the face of a man appeared. His face quickly noticed Jade and she lowered her face to shield it from his gaze. After exchanging a couple words, Loren went inside while calmly exchanging words with the man. Jade remained where she were, but her hands slowly gripped the reigns... just in case someone would find them for the short period of time she was left alone.
A tormenting long moment passed until Loren finally stepped out of the house and walked towards her. His gait was steady and with soft wave of his hand he signaled for her that it was safe.
When he reached the horse, Jade was just about to dismount.
"Let me h-"
"I can dismount on my own, Loren." Jade assured him in a complaint as she sensed his hands hover around her. He ignored her and made sure she got down safely and stood somewhat steady on her numb legs before he took a step back. "I said I can do it myself." She told him when it was done with. His hands quickly made sure that her hood was up and covering every part of her face that was memorable, instead of answering her.
"Keep those eyes on the ground." He instructed her. "They will provide us with food and shelter until dusk." He explained before she opened her mouth. "Do not take your hood off and do not speak to them. Not a word." He told her and grabbed on to the reigns of the horse. "They have also been informed not to speak to you."
"What did you tell them?" Jade whispered while he motioned her gently but decisively towards the farm house.
"I paid them for their silence and discretion. They have been assured that if they help us and do not look at you - no one will or can punish them for doing so." Jade's whole face turned into confusion. He noticed.
"You told them that someone is after us?"
He shook his head in response. "No, only that your identity needs to remain unknown. I told them nothing else."
"Of course he can and will punish them if he finds out that they helped mysterious strangers. He will take even the slightest chance of doing so if he suspects them of treason. It is too dangerous for them-"
"If they do not see you, or what you look like, they can tell whomever asks them if they have seen a woman with your features, that they have not." He assured her calmly as they walked on. Jade nervously licked her lips and threw a glance towards the house and then looked at him again.
"What did you tell them?" Jade reiterated her earlier question. Demanding a better explanation.
"I told them that you are a simple stranger in need of rest and food for a couple of hours. They will only recognize me." He said, as if it was meant to give her peace of mind.
Jade stopped in her tracks while her mind fogged up with panic. She wanted to tell him that he could have said that she was on the run from her abusive family or something, until she realized that that was in a way what she was doing. So she kept it to herself.
Loren gave her a gently nudge to keep walking and she followed. He spoke no more, probably thinking she was content with his response. Until she stopped as panic overflowed within her. They will only recognize me. Loren's voice echoed in her mind.
"If they can tell someone what you look like, that will lead Rowan's men right to you if they pass this house. To us. If any of his men can tell them what you look like from memory..." she pointed at the house "...they will have to tell the truth in order to protect themselves." She continued. "I would not blame them for doing so, but it means we cannot stay here."
"That will only happen if Rowan's men knows what I look like." He replied calmly and gesticulated to her to inhale slowly and deeply. "They did not get a good look at me in the camp."
"They saw you at the inn." She reminded him darkly when the thought struck her. How had she not thought of this until now?! How had he not?!
Loren opened his mouth to retaliate but remained silent. Whatever he was about to say, remained unspoken as he realized that Jade was in fact right this time. "I will buying new clothes in the next village we pass through." He declared and placed himself between her and the farm house. "You need your own cloak and I need a new one." He murmured while giving her a quick look up and down, eyeing what had happened to his since he had given it to her.
She looked down at the frayed edges of the cloak wrapper around her. There was also a large tear on its right side.
"Looks like the thorns did what they do best." He said and cleared his throat. "Now, let us get inside. Keep your head down and please stay quiet, Alva." Loren said quietly and pushed the door open. Jade nodded in acceptance of her new name and stepped inside with him.
The next day, they were back in the saddle before the family had awakened, just before dawn. The man of the house had offered them to stay the whole night after having a heated argument of whispers with his wife, whom had audibly gasped at the sight of the state Jade's cloak was in. Loren had left a surprisingly large amount of coins on a table by the door to show their gratitude. Jade found the amount of coin more than fair considering the amount of danger and risk their stay meant to the family.
They rode all day and only stopped for a couple of hours in a village to exchange their horse for a new well rested one. Jade had started to form the question of acquiring a second horse until she thought about how their limited amount of coin must be put to better use; for things as food and shelter. So, she let the question die before it was even uttered.
Close to that evening they rode in through the gates of a wooden palisade and into a grim looking town. Jade kept her eyes on Loren's back as he searched for a place fort them to stay the night. It was not until after dusk that he had finally chosen an inn fit to stay at, after having examining and deciding between multiple ones.
Finally. Jade thought to herself at the thought of a moment's rest. She had been frequently reminded by memories of how difficult and childish she had been the last time. It made her cheeks almost scolding hot to the touch and she could not imagine how red they must have been. Although, her embarrassing memories was nothing compared to the gaping hole of shame that resided in her chest. This time she barely spoke and had not questioned her guard, or whined, like she had done the last time. Neither would she.
Loren dismounted and helped her do the same. Jade placed her hands on his shoulders and enjoyed the feeling of her spine stretching as she was midair. Her buttocks felt numb and flat as well. Her entire body ached, longing for a good rest. Her guard's touch was so delicate that one might think she was made of fresh, thin, winter ice.
"How many times do I have to tell you? You don't have to hover over me, Loren. I won't break into a million pieces." She told him with her brows furrowing at him when his hands seemed to soar just close enough to catch her if she would suddenly fall over when her feet was firmly placed on the ground. "I am only with child." She moaned and rubbed her backside awake.
"Of course, dear Alva." He chuckled while his eyes gave her a strict reminder not to speak his name so freely. Jade shamefully pressed her lips together and berated herself mentally for being so foolish. "Come along now, dear. You must rest." Jade fought off the smirk and sudden urge to laugh at him when he pretended that she was his wife, or something of the sort, as he guided her inside.
He needs a false name as well... She thought but could not come up with anything that would suit him. Liz truly picked a perfect name for her son.
They ate in their room and when the life on the streets outside had died, Jade broke the silence that hung in the air between them. "How did you get away? From Rowan's camp?" She asked quietly. "How did you manage to get me-"
"Thank heavens, she speaks. I almost missed your never ending supply of questions." Loren chuckled quietly and looked up from trying to mend his cloak even though they had planned on buying new ones the next day. His task seemed utterly impossible since the cloak was in such a horrible state. "Almost." He teased and continued with his craftsmanship.
Jade rolled her eyes at him.
"I was beginning to think the worst. That my dear Alva had lost her tongue." He said with a faint but playful smile on his face. "Your grace." He then whispered nearly inaudibly, as if he would become physically ill if he did not pay his respect to her.
Jade raised her left eyebrow at his jesting. "Stop that." She told him. "It is only the two of us-"
"You should rest." He declared and looked down at his cloak again with a sigh. "This bloody thing is impossible to mend..."
Jade swallowed the rest of her words in the middle of her unfinished sentence. She was starting to feel annoyance rise within her when her guard interrupted her over and over.
"I will rest." Jade assured him and clenched her jaws when he returned to his needlework. "After you have answered me."
"I have answered you. Now rest." He told her, just a bit too strictly for Jade's taste. She bit the inside of her cheek as her patience slipped from her as quick as water running down ice. She had been so good and kept from snapping at him and not letting her temper get the best of her, but why was it so hard this very moment? A memory of how easily irritated her mother had been while expecting Iria flashed before her eyes and reminded Jade of her condition. Slowly, she inhaled through her nose, pushing her temper back.
It is no excuse. You cannot bite his head off because you are expecting. She told herself sternly and felt the urge to snap back subside, tormentingly slowly. Epecieally considering everything he's done for you, for us.
She threw a quick glance at him and could see in his eyes that he considered himself the winner of this dispite. Then some of her attitude slipped out of her before she could stop herself.
"Your needlework is an abomination." She informed him with a composed and stable voice. She adjusted her pillow and continued. "Let the poor piece of clothing die with what little dignity it has left instead leaving it to the agony that is your hands armed with a needle. Dear husband." She laid down when the last word had passed her lips.
An unstoppable chortle was the only reply coming from her guard, shortly followed by the sound of him throwing the cloak into the fireplace.
They slept in shifts. When it came to Loren's turn for some well deserved rest, he refused to sleep in the bed when it was Jade's turn to keep watch for Ulf and his men. He insisted on sleeping in front of the fireplace, on the floor, just as he was.
Thankfully, the night brought nothing but silence.
The next day, they stopped in a village that looked just like all the others they had passed. It was incredibly dull looking with grey clouds above and a light drizzle of rain coming down. Nothing about the town, or its dwellers, implied that they had any idea of the war that was raging between its king and his nephew. Their every day misery seemed to be their main concern.
"How did you get away?" Jade asked while they walked beside their horse, heading in the direction of a market being held in the main square. Loren shot her a side way glance and she saw his jaws clench as he thought of her question. His eyes begged her for mercy and to let him be free of the memory of Jade's last time in Rowan's camp. It was clear as day that he was not in the mood of discussing what events laid behind them. The cut on his cheek had started to heal but it still screamed red at her.
"We fought them off." He answered while tying the horse to a wooden railing in a designated area where other mounts stood, all waiting for their owners at market. Loren patted the horse appreciatively on its hind leg as they left it there.
"Not all of them?" Jade asked, baffled, thinking of the number of men that had been in the camp.
"Of course not." He answered grimly and guided her without touching her towards a shop keeper that sold clothes.
"Then-" Jade asked.
"William and the others created a distraction." Loren replied, foreseeing her question. "Although, the original plan went completely to hell."
"Why?"
"Something went wrong, like I said. But we succeeded in getting you out nonetheless and that is all that counts."
"How many of them died?" She asked, wishing a gruesome death upon as many of Rowan's men as possible.
"I do not know. I was not there 'til the end. Probably not enough of them were killed since Rowan could spare a searching party like the one we have chasing after us." He gave her a look that told her that he was not in the mood for continuing the conversation.
"Do you think he is still alive?" She asked, referring to William and wrapped her arms around herself, wordlessly signing that this would be the last question.
"Last time I saw him, he was as fierce and furious as a king ought to be when his queen has been ripped from him."
"That is not-"
"What do you want to hear, Jade?" Loren blurted out in frustration and combed his hand through the dark blond hair. "He might be hurt, dead or alive. I do not know!" His eyes widened in frustration due to his blunder and he pinched the bridge of his nose.
A strange and tense silence grew between them. Jade knew she had pushed him too far. He would not have used her true name if she restrained herself. "I am sorry." Jade whispered.
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Thank you so much for reading, I really hoped you liked this chapter!
Updated: 13th of September 2022.
All the best,
Jenny