Mal -
We both chuckle and then the feeling in the air shifts. "I really thought that's what you and Ben had," Evie says. We stop walking and look at each other. "Do you wanna talk about it?"
I look at my feet. "I'm not coming back, Evie." She lets go of my hand and looks down too. "I can't. I-I really tried to tell you." She looks away from me and leans against the wall, grimacing. "But I mean, I saw the way your face lit up when we walked into those dorm rooms for the first time. And I... I couldn't spoil that for you."
Evie bites her lip and gets that stubborn look on her face. "If you're staying, I'm staying too."
"No." I say, firmly. "You're an Auradon girl. You belong there. And I am, and will always be... the girl from the Isle." We're both silent. I pick up a rock and throw it at the sign that opens the gate.
We walk up the stairs together, silent. But all of a sudden, Evie stops walking and starts tearing up. "I, I didn't know you were going through this. I don't know how I missed it. Why didn't you just ask me for help?"
I swallow and put my hand in hers. "I... I couldn't. I was scared to let you down, to let Auradon down, I guess. Everyone thinks I'm this completely different girl, and I just..." I start tearing up now. "I can't keep up the act. Ben's in love with that girl, Auradon accepts that girl. Not me. I... I had to go."
Evie is full on crying now. She takes my other hand and we sit on a step. "Mal, it's okay. I'm here for you no matter what. I'm so sorry if I made you think you'd disappoint me if you were your true self. All that matters is that you're happy."
I lean onto her shoulder and let all the bottled up emotions from the last sixth months out through more tears.
"I just... don't want to be away from you. I need you by my side. You're the glue that holds my life together," Evie says, her voice full of emotion.
I put my arms around her and hug her. "You are for me, too. But I can't take you away from Auradon."
"Then come back, please. We can leave Auradon Prep and live somewhere else. I-I'll shut down Four Hearts and break up with Doug, all that matters is that we're together."
I shake my head. "No, Evie, I wouldn't be able to live with myself if you threw everything away for me. This is how it has to be," I say, standing up. "C'mon, we should get inside."
Evie stands up and we walk up the rest of the stairs. We reach the spray paint covered apartment and land on the very vintage sofa. The boys must be in the side room where they used to usually hang out, since they aren't in the main room.
"Evie, I'll... I'll always be with you, no matter where you are," I say, looking right into her chocolate brown eyes. Her face crumples up again and she lays her head in my lap. I stroke her royal blue hair.
"I can't leave you here, Mal. You... you need someone to protect you." She says, looking for more excuses. "Uma and her crew, they'll be out to get you." Evie sits up and looks me right in the eyes. "I couldn't live with myself if I let you stay here alone. Please, let me stay with you. I... I can just hide from my mom, I guess."
I shake my head again, "Evie, no. You belong in Auradon, you know it. You're not safe here." Finally, Evie nods, tears still streaming down her face, mascara totally smudged.
"It's not fair," she mutters. "Why can't there just be no barrier at all?"
We hold hands in silence, and I start thinking about all the times Evie has helped me. She helped me when my mother was so angry with me many times, even though I was so mean to her when we were younger. She helped me when I was having second thoughts about Ben last time, which I ended up not telling him about even though Evie thought I had. She had made me so many gorgeous dresses and talked me through so many hard days. She caught me every time I fell, every day I couldn't face alone. God, where would I be without my Evie. I could never take her happiness away by letting her give everything up just to help me. She deserves the joy she's given me. I just want to make her happy. I look at her tear stained face and smile. If she looked in the mirror now she would freak out that her makeup was so messed up, but I think it makes her look even more beautiful. She's probably still strategizing how to convince me to let her stay. Why does she have to be so kindhearted and genuine, even when it comes at a huge cost to her own joy? I feel a little flutter in my chest as I think about Evie. My Evie. The girl who had always been there for me, even when I didn't give her much in return. It would be horrible to be away from her, but I could never let her give everything up for me. She deserves so much. Suddenly, the puzzle pieces fall into place. My eyes widen. I look up. Holy shit, I was in love with Evie. Head over heels in love. This is what that feeling was. I had it with Ben, I guess, but I had always had it with Evie. I just... didn't know what love was until I met Ben, but I hadn't realized my feelings for Evie were that until now. My heart starts racing as I finally understand why I've always cared about her so much.
Suddenly, Carlos and Jay appear through one of the archways, and then immediately catch the feeling in the room. I needed to talk to one of them about this, now.
Evie -
"Hey, you both okay?" Carlos asks, sitting on a bean bag next to me.
I shake my head and sob again, leaning on Mal's shoulder.
"Wanna talk?" Jay asks, leaning against a wall. I look up at Mal, and she nods.
"I..." She gulps. "Everyone wants me to be this lady of the court, but... I'm not her. Ben loves her, Auradon trusts her, you guys think she's great but... she's not me. I'm a phony. And I... I can't go back because... if I'm my true self no one will love me anymore."
I clutch her hand tight and look straight at her. "Of course we'll still love you, M." I bite my lip, sensing how good that feels to tell her.
Carlos puts his hand on Mal's shoulder. "Mal, if Ben can't see how incredible the real you is, then he's not the one."
"Yeah, Mal. And screw him, man. He doesn't deserve you if he's forcing you to be all fake," Jay says, coming closer to the rest of us.
"I can't go back, guys," Mal says.
Carlos sighs, and looks up to Mal. "Then we'll stay. Or, I'll stay, at least."
"No, Carlos, you belong in Auradon. Remember Jane? You can't give all that up for me." Carlos puts his face in his hands.
"Mal, we've got your back. We can't be there for you if you're inside the barrier and we're not," Jay says.
"M, I want to be there for you, like Jay said. I need to be able to be that for you. It's a joy to me. Please don't push us out," I mutter.
She shakes her head again. "I don't belong there, E. You do."
"Just... please don't push me out." I whisper, still not relenting. Mal shakes her head, stands up and runs to the door and exits. I can't hold in my emotions now, they're all flowing out faster than I've ever felt them. I really cannot imagine not having Mal by my side. I can't live without her. I need to be able to make her happy and feel loved, and I failed. I made her think she needed to pretend for me to love her, when that was the opposite of the truth. I bury my face in my hands and cry, quietly but strongly. I need Mal, but I can't stay on the Isle.
"Hey, Carlos, can you go talk to Mal?" I hear Jay ask. Then I hear Carlos's footsteps, and the click of the door. I sense Jay standing up and sitting next to me on the couch.
"Evie, it's gonna be okay," he mutters.
"Jay..." I mumble. I lean on his shoulder now, and try to stop the tears.
"Hey, it's ok. Just cry," He tells me. I follow his advice and cry for a while. I hardly even know why. I just know that I need Mal to be by my side and I can't imagine what it'd be like not to have her be there. Not to be able to help her when she needed it, not to be able to be there for her. She had been the constant between me as an Isle girl and me as an Auradon girl, as Mal would say. She'd always been my rock, my forever. I always trusted that we'd be side-by-side forever, but now that might change, and imagining what that'd be like hurt. Suddenly I sat up.
"Wait..." I rubbed my eyes. I took a deep breath. Was... did I... was I in love with Mal? I swallowed.
"Evie, what's up?"
"Uh, nothing just... I dunno." I leaned back and tried to process this. All of a sudden the pieces fell into place. How I always wanted to make sure Mal was okay and happy, and that she knew that she was cared for. How I always wanted to protect her from her mother, how I always admired her bravery. How, no matter what, I always needed to be there for her. She was my forever, the person I had always known would be by my side for the rest of my life. But I guess I always saw that as a friendship thing, but now I realized that it wasn't just that. I wanted her to be mine, and I wanted me to be hers. Forever together, forever supporting and loving each other. My heart raced as everything that had ever happened to me became clear, every feeling I had ever experienced. Oh, this is me. I was filled with nervousness and excitement and dread. How would I ever tell Mal? What if her reaction caused the end of our friendship in total? What if no one accepted us? What would Ben think? If we had to stay on the Isle, what if my mother found out? I knew she wouldn't be happy if she knew I was with... a girl. But then also... what would we wear to our wedding? We could live in that new cottage I've been looking at to start my first shop in. I could wake up early and make her breakfast every morning and we could read books together in the sunlight and eat strawberries together and have deep conversations every day, those ones we have on a regular basis anyway, but they would make even more sense since our relationship would finally be what it was always destined to be. I had to tell someone about this, it was all too exciting and terrifying to bear on my own.
"J-Jay..." I mumble.
"Yeah?"
I gulp. "I just... I think I just realized something big."
"What... is it?" Jay asks, confused.
"I... uh... I think I'm in love with Mal. I think I always have been."
Jay's eyes widen, but he smiles. "Oh, uh, okay. You should tell her."
"But, what if she doesn't feel the same way? What if she hates me afterward?"
"Who cares! You'll always regret it if you don't at least talk to her." I sigh, and I know he's right. "I can see it in your face. I mean, I'm no feelings expert, but like, your eyes are all glimmery like a cartoon character. You really love her. I didn't see this coming, but now I totally see how it makes total sense," Jay says, seeming surprised by his own words.
"That's exactly how I feel!" I cry, finally understanding the pain I've felt these last few hours when I didn't know if I'd ever see Mal again after tonight. "I have to tell her! I have to! I love her so much I can't even shut up about it!" All of a sudden I stand up and squeal. "Jay! This is love! I feel like Snow White! Oh my gosh, I have to tell her!" My excitement overcomes my fear, and I jump in the air.
Jay stands up too and laughs. Then, suddenly, Mal and Carlos appear.
Mal -
Carlos opens the door to find me sobbing into my hands, sitting on the top stair. He immediately sits next to me and puts his arm around me. I would've stopped the tears if I could, but I just kept crying.
I cry for my failure in Auradon, and for the fact that I had to leave my friends behind. For the fact that the barrier would always be there, no matter how much pain it caused these people. For the fact that I had loved Evie all along but hadn't realized it until I had to leave her. For the fact that all my life I had pretended to be someone I'm not.
"Y'know, I... I think if you talked this out with Ben he might understand. He's a good guy," Carlos finally says. I sit up and shake my head.
"No... I... I... I think I don't love him anymore." Carlos pats my back as I take a deep breath. Here goes. "I... I think I love someone else. Someone who's always been there, someone who loves the real me. Someone I never thought I could care about in this way but... always have."
"Mal, it's not Jay, right?" I let out a broken laugh-sob, and shake my head. I had to say it. I had to tell someone. "I... I think I might be in love with... Evie."
"Ohhhh," Carlos mumbles, finally understanding. "Mal, that's amazing."
I break down again in tears and lean on him. "That's okay, Mal. You should talk to her. We all just want you to be happy."
I sit up again and wipe my face with my gloves. "Carlos, it's not gonna work. I can't go back to Auradon, and she can't stay here." I say, trying to make myself stop crying. "I just... had to tell someone. It's out of my system now though, and I can just forget about it, I guess." I start to stand up, but Carlos grabs my hand.
"No," he says, more firmly than I'd ever heard him say anything. "Remember what you told me about Jane? 'You'll always wonder what would have happened if you don't ask her. It's better to be heartbroken than to regret what you didn't say.'"
I sigh. "Carlos, it's different. We've just been friends for so long, and I don't even know if she likes girls. I didn't even know I do until, like, twenty minutes ago."
"Mal," he looks me right in the eyes. "Ask her. I promise, it's the right thing to do."
"But... it'll just make her want to stay more or make things awkward so we really will never see each other again. It's too painful."
"Not as painful as never knowing," he says, still reciting my own advice for him. "Please, you should tell her. If you really intend to stay here and hardly see us again, you should tell her tonight."
I sigh and bite my lip. "I guess you're right."
We walk back inside and Carlos tells Jay to come outside with him. Evie looks oddly happy, standing next to Jay inside. The boys exit. Evie and I sit on the couch.
"Evie, I... I need to tell you something," I start, tickles of nerves in my chest.
"I need to tell you something!" She says, super excitedly.
"You go first," I tell her.
"No, you go," she says, suddenly a little calmer.
She leans back on my shoulder. Her touch sends sparks up my spine, a familiar feeling that I have no idea how I didn't realize why I felt it earlier.
"I..." I choke up. I can't say it. Evie looks up at me.
"What is it, M?"
I swallow, trying to clear the lump in my throat. I try again "I... I think..." Again, I can't say it. I just... can't. "You go first," I say.
She nods and takes a deep breath, a wide smile spreading across her face. "M, I think..." I run through all the ways she could change the conversation so I wouldn't have to confess. I think you're right, I should just go back to Auradon and leave you here. I think I might propose to Doug. I think I need to touch up your eyeliner. But then...
"I'm in love with you," she says. My mouth drops open, utterly shocked.
"I... I..." I mumble.
"I know, it doesn't make sense... but I just know it. I think I've always kinda known it, but I never really acknowledged it or thought about it. But... thinking about being without you hurts so bad it's made me realize my true feelings. M, I... I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you."
My vocal chords won't work. I can't form a sentence, let alone a thought. Everything is changing so fast. My moment to respond passes, and she stands up, suddenly panicking.
"No, no, no. I've ruined it now. I'm so weird, why did I say that? It's probably just in my head, M, just forget I said anything." She starts for the door.
"No! Wait!" I run up to her and grasp her hands in mine. "I... um, earlier, I... I was going to say... I think I'm in love with you."
Evie's face drops into shock, the same shock I felt when she told me.
"Oh my gosh, M, it... it wasn't in my head! I... It's always been you. It'll always be us. Only us. Only you." She grabs me in a tight hug and rocks me back and forth. I can't even say anything, I was so surprised. Everything in my world had shifted in just the last half hour. I finally put together the puzzle that had been in front of me for years. I finally realized all I've ever needed and desired has been right in front of me for years. She pulls back and I clutch her hands. Her face, still covered in smudged makeup, lit up with an illuminated feeling of understanding, the same look I know I'm wearing.
"E, oh, E. My E." I say, putting my face on her shoulder and my hand in her blue hair. She lifts up my chin and puts her forehead on mine.
"It will always be you and me. It always has been." I pull her into another tight hug.
"M, I don't care about anything in Auradon. It all makes sense now," she whispers. "All I need is you."
"Y'know what, I don't care about any of that shit in Auradon either. I don't care what anyone thinks of me. All... all I care about is you," I whisper back.
Evie pulls back again. "M, we... we can't be... us on the Isle. My mother..." she trails off.
I look down. I hadn't even thought of that. My mother was still a lizard in my backpack, but Evie's mom was still the powerful Evil Queen, lurking somewhere around the Isle. If she got word that Evie was back, she would stop at nothing to find her. If she heard Evie and I were... together, she'd probably find her and lock her in a literal tower.
"E... If we go back to Auradon, I'll need your help. I can't get stuck being that girl again," I say.
A huge, brilliant smile spreads across her face. "Of course I'll help you, my M. I'll need your help dealing with... Doug."
"Oh my gosh right, Doug." I say, pulling away. "E, if he's more important to you, we can just both forget this happened and I'll stay here."
"No! No, M. No, no, no. I need you to be mine, and... and me to be yours. I don't care about him. You're all I've ever needed, and I see that now." We embrace again.
"So... are we going back to Auradon?" She asks, an excited lilt in her voice.
I bite my lip. "I guess so!"
Evie hugs me tighter. We hold each other for a while, and decide not to tell anyone about us until we're back in Auradon, safe from her mother and Uma. We go outside to find the boys, who are waiting outside the door.
"So, uh. We're going back to Auradon. All of us," I tell them. Carlos gives me a proud glance, and we head downstairs to our motorcycles.