𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝕿𝖍𝖗𝖊𝖊
ⓉᕼE ᗰOᖇᑎIᑎG ᗩIᖇ was crisp and fresh as cool wind tangled my hair. Aleksander was waiting for me at his black carriage. I felt foolish for not realizing that I would be riding with him, but I suppose the alternative would be to ride on horseback with the soldiers in front for several miles without stopping. I'd rather take my chances with someone I do not fully trust yet before riding on a horse for the whole journey.
"Good morning," he greets. "Did you get good sleep last night?"
"Good sleep? Hmm, I prefer staring at the ceiling for most of the night until I eventually fall asleep three hours before I need to wake up again."
Aleksander smiled his rare boyish smile that displayed a small but noticeable dimple on his left side. "I'm glad to know you sleep as well as I do."
He assisted me into the cab and then followed me in. The velvet cushions and puffy throw pillows were softer than anything I had felt before. I suppose that was one of the many perks of being the general. He raised an eyebrow at me when I sprawled across the seat and buried my face in the cushion, but I couldn't care less. It felt like heaven.
"I am glad you like the carriage. It will be our residence for the next month or so. Morozova's Stag was spotted deep in the Fjerdan forest."
I glanced up at him before plopping my head back into the pillows, letting out a muffled groan. Then, I asked, "Why couldn't it have been spotted in Balakirev or Poliznaya. Somewhere close to Os Alta. Why did it have to be far away in enemy territory?"
The Darkling smirked before saying, "You thought hunting one of Morozova's creatures would be easy? There is a reason none of them have been killed or even commonly sighted for hundreds of years."
I huffed and sat up to make myself comfortable. This would be a long ride.
ᗯE SET ᑌᑭ camp after two days of non-stop travel. The comfortable seats became unbearable. I desperately needed to stretch my legs, so when we finally stopped to make camp for the night, I flung open the door and tumbled out of the carriage as if my life depended on it.
The sky was a bright array of pinks, blues, and oranges, and soldiers worked arduously to set up camp. It was imperative that the tents be set up before nightfall; otherwise, it would have been a wasted effort searching in the darkness for stakes and poles laid out on the ground. I wanted to help, but the Darkling shooed me back into the carriage as soon as I had stretched my sore legs. We were getting closer and closer to the Fjerdan border, which meant drüskelle would become more prevalent. If word hadn't gotten to them already about our travels, they would find us eventually, seeing that a group of thirty Grisha and a dozen First Army soldiers were traveling to their woods.
I must have fallen asleep in the cab because the next thing I remembered was a hand gently shaking my shoulder. My eyes fluttered open to find Aleksander sitting on the edge of the seat next to my curled-up figure. His steel grey eyes softened when they met my brown ones. Although the windows were tinted, I could tell it was late into the night.
"Our tent is set up. We will both need good rest tonight. The next morning, we will continue around the Petrazoi Mountains, which will extend our journey, but after we are clear of them, it should be a less grueling trip from there."
I had stopped listening after the words 'our tent.' "What do you mean, our tent?"
He sighed and said, "we are getting ever closer to Fjerda, which means we—and more specifically—you are in danger. Once they hear that we have the Sun Summoner, they will send as many drüskelle as they can to find and kill you. I would feel much better if you were with me at all times."
"Well, that is unfortunate because I really have to pee."
He smiled and said, "alright, most of the time."
He extended his hand, which I took, and he helped me out of the carriage. Then, the Darkling guided me to our tent, which was much larger than I was expecting. Inside, there was a fur rug on the ground and a bed to the left of the entrance. To my right, there were two chairs, a coffee table, and a fire pit. This was definitely not the smelly canvas tents I was used to in the First Army. I had shared the living quarters with a dozen men back then, but now I was only sharing the tent with one man. It shouldn't be too bad, should it? It's just the man that I almost went further than kissing with during the Fete. I sighed internally and swatted the memories away before my mind could dive deeper into my tentative feelings for the Darkling.
I watched the Darkling walk over to a cedar chest and open it, pulling out a black, silky nightgown. "Here," he said, handing it to me. I turned red, realizing that the nightclothes were remarkably thin. "Where do I change?" I stupidly asked.
"Where do you think?" he replied with a smirk. My face must have been redder than a tomato by now. I bit my lip.
"I hope you don't think I am devoid of any propriety, Miss Starkov."
With that, he left the tent to let me change in private. He came back after a few minutes, and then it was my turn to wait outside while he changed. I had waited an extra minute for good measure. When I entered, he was sitting on the edge of the bed, and that was when I stupidly realized that there was a bed.
"There is only one bed," I observed innocently.
"Yes, there was supposed to be two beds, but there must have been a mixup. I hope you are not too bothered by it."
"...No," I said in an unsure manner. Nevertheless, I glided over to the opposite side of the bed. It was a big bed, so it would not be too strange, right? I reasoned.
I slipped into bed, as did he, and I turned away from the Darkling, but I could feel his gaze aimed at the space between my shoulder blades. My breaths became more shallow until I stopped breathing entirely.
"Relax," the Darkling said from behind me. "I don't bite... Unless you want me to."
My eyes grew wide as I replayed his words over and over in my head to make sure I had heard it right. "That's not funny," I finally said with a tremor in my voice.
"I did not say it to be funny." His voice was silky yet cold at the same time. He was making it known in very clear terms that he wanted me... Did I want him? I felt his unfaltering gaze burning through me, but I couldn't bring myself to turn around, afraid of what I would let happen, so I yanked a pillow from under my head and whacked his face with it. I hoped I had hit his face anyway, because I did not turn towards him to check.
"Goodnight, Aleksander," I droned lowly.
I heard the pillow get plopped on the floor at his side of the bed. "Goodnight, Alina." I could hear the smugness in his voice, and it made me want to use my other pillow on him, but it was the only one I had left, so I just huffed and closed my eyes.
I fell asleep almost immediately, which was rare for me. Although, the night was cold, and I found myself shivering during the early morning hours. The Darkling must have noticed my shaking because I felt his arm slip around my torso, then he pulled me closer. His warm breath on my neck caused a shiver to run down my spine, and I froze for a minute. "What are you doing?" I asked, still shivering all the while.
"You were cold," he whispered, "and we do not have any more blankets."
"Oh," I said pathetically. My breaths were shallow, but I forced myself to untense. I felt his heartbeat thumping on my back as he hugged me from behind. Now I had goosebumps, not from the cold but from the feeling I had when I was this close to him. Eventually, my anxiety faded to nothing, and I put my hand on his bicep to keep him close. My eyelids became heavy, and the cream-colored tent wall dwindled from my vision until the darkness of sleep consumed me once again.
My slumber was not as long as I had hoped, though. I awoke again to the sound of fabric tearing, or more accurately, the wall of the canvas tent being cut open with a knife. Then, there was suddenly a man pulling me by the hair, trying to yank me out of bed, but I held on. "Drüsje!" he yelled. My heart was racing as fast as a hummingbird. I realized how close to death I was, and I was about to get killed by a drüskelle. They had found us. I screamed and flailed around on the bed until I felt the drüskelle's rough hands release their grip on me. I scrambled back to the headboard and looked around wildly to understand what had happened. The Darkling had summoned shadows that snaked up the man's arms and legs like a serpent. Then, there was a snap, and the man crumpled to the ground.
"Are you hurt?" the Darkling asked in concern. I could not speak, so I shook my head. He rushed outside to check if there were more; however, as soon as he left, three more drüskelle crawled under the opposite wall of the tent and inched forward in pursuit of me. One of them had a large machete, and the others had a hatchet and rope.
"Aleks!" I cried out. The drüskelle lunged towards the bed, and there were too many of them to take on all at once, so I did the only thing I could. I jutted out my arms to blind them with light. A beam of pure white sunlight scorched their eyes, and they stumbled back. I squinted to shield my eyes from the brightness and heard a sickening rip of flesh and muscle through the darkness. When I compelled my eyes to open again, I nearly vomited at the sight of the three men cut in half, sprawled across the red-soaked ground. Aleksander brought his arms to his sides after using the Cut and quickly strode toward me. I did not realize I was shaking until he wrapped a blanket around me and pulled me close to his chest to stop my body from quivering.
Ivan came running into the tent a second later. "Moi soverenyi, there has been an attack..." he looked down at the bloody heap on the ground and said, "but you already knew that."
"Was anyone hurt?" Aleksander asked while still holding me in a comforting manner.
"We lost one Opriknik and two Grisha—a Healer and an Inferni. There were ten Grisha hunters spread out in the camp. I have men surveying the site, and no more seem to remain."
With a grimace, Aleksander replied, "alright, get everyone ready to begin travel again. Although the group of drüskelle was small, there will be more coming. We will just have to risk journeying in the dark."
Ivan bowed his head, and I heard him giving orders as soon as he exited our tent.
I thought the Darkling would rush to get up, but he held me for an additional minute before whispering, "We should get moving." I nodded stiffly and let out a shaky "thank you for protecting me." He rested his chin in the curve of my neck and muttered, "of course." He paused for a minute. "When you called me for help... did you call me Aleks?"
"Oh... Sorry. It just came out."
"No, no. I like it," he said in surprise as if it hadn't occurred to him that he could be called by that common nickname. His lips curled into a crooked smile. I rarely got to see that boyish smile but it gave me butterflies every time without fail.
"No one has called you Aleks before?" I questioned.
"Well, my mother is not one for nicknames, and there are not many others who know my name. They are certainly not close enough to call me that."
"Aleks," I whispered again, letting it roll off my tongue and hang in the air. His smile grew in response. "I like it too," I said. The sparkle in his eyes seemed to turn to something more profound. Lust and something that seemed like anger. His lips were slightly parted, and he leaned in slowly, hovering above me. My eyelids fluttered shut.
Although we have kissed before, this seemed different. I could not shake the image of him creating the Fold and all of the people that were sacrificed because of it. So many people within the boundaries of his mistake suffered. As much as I tried to see him as the Aleksander that had walked me to the wishing well and told me of his troubled past, I also saw the Black Heretic—the greed-driven, selfish man who had apparently lived for hundreds of years and has had time to practice lying. He could have been manipulating me at this moment, but the butterflies in my stomach and the pounding of my heart were distracting. I should have run the night Baghra told me of his true identity, but I could not bring myself to do it. The fact is: I was selfish too.
"W–we should probably get ready to leave," I said to interrupt his advances. Our lips were dangerously close. I retreated, turning my head to the side, removing my lips out of the path to his.
He cleared his throat and responded, "Right. Yes." Aleksander stood up abruptly and went to the cedar chest to retrieve a kefta, which he slid over his broad shoulders. I couldn't help but think that I had upset him. He seemed contemptuous as he walked around the tent, gathering and packing things. Don't be ridiculous, I chided myself. You didn't hurt the Darkling's feelings. He has been alive for at least four hundred years. He's eternal. But I couldn't shake the feeling of tension between us as he stiffly shuffled around the tent, avoiding my gaze.
IT ᕼᗩᗪ STᗩᖇTEᗪ TO ᖇᗩIᑎ, a light drizzle at first, but it slowly turned into a downpour. We could barely see anything, and the ground became muddy as we finished packing up the camp. The Darkling held his kefta above my head to protect me from the cold rain. When we scrambled into his carriage, I let out a sigh of relief to be away from the pounding rain. The droplets made a tinking sound on the carriage's metal roof.
After a moment of silence, the Darkling asked, "Are you okay?"
"Mhm." I nodded, and he raised an eyebrow at me. I sighed and shook my head 'no.' Aleksander moved over to my side of the cab and put a hand on my soggy back. "I should not have used the Cut. Not in front of you. I am sorry—"
"It's not that," I said quickly.
He looked confused, and his brows drew together. "Then what is it?"
"When we first met, you told me that I would get used to being hunted. But I haven't. I do not want to go to bed every night with a blade under my pillow. I want to have a moment of peace where I am not a target to kill or exploit for my power. Is that so much to ask?"
"Yes, unfortunately," he answered with a solemn face. "People are scared of what they do not know. You are the first of your kind, which paints a large target on your back. I wish we could both live in peace; however, fate did not give us that choice."
I huffed like a child and said, "Fate is stupid. I don't want to be used to people trying to kill me! Why couldn't I live a normal life?" I shook my head and took in a wavering breath. I was acting bitter, but in reality, I was just scared. I think Aleksander could sense that somehow.
The Darkling smiled bitterly and brought me closer to his body. I leaned against him, and he stroked my dull brown hair. "Try to get some rest."
Rest. I humorlessly chortled to myself. Easy after just about being filleted by Grisha hunters. As if he could hear my thoughts, Aleksander embraced me tighter and replied, "I know. Let us at least pretend that sleep is our safety from the precarious world for now."
I laid there for a while, eyes closed, pretending that I was trying to rest until I actually did fall asleep in his arms. Although I had many nightmares of being taken to Ice Court and murdered by Fjerdans or cut open like an experiment by the Shu Han, I always woke up with Aleks holding me. In spite of the fact that he was the Black Heretic, that did not mean that his heart was black as well. Either that or perhaps my heart was rotting alongside his, but if that meant I would not be alone anymore, I would stay by his side. I knew what being alone felt like; before Mal came to the orphanage, I was just another lonely refugee. Perhaps wanting him was selfish, but I would not be alone again as I was at the orphanage and as the Darkling was for so many years before me.
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Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed and see you next Tuesday. Also, on a side note, this story starts off a bit slow, but it picks up in a few chapters, I promise. <3