She spent nearly two years loving him.
Eden had buried the remnants of her unrequited love last winter. She literally buried it. A two-year-old love letter penned with muji gel pens and a box full of birthday cards and Christmas cards she could never verbalise was entombed in a time capsule under a foot of soil in her backyard, visible from her bedroom window.
Eden sat on her bed, chin resting on her knees.
The clock read 4:30am, yet she wasn't tired. For the first time in a while, she felt nothing.
She had slept...alright for once. It was definitely a change from all those sleepless nights she had spent before she spent them with Lei, both of them calling each other at the dead of night seeking comfort, love and humour as the holidays passed minute by minute.
It was beautiful nights like those that kept her holding on. Those nights helped them both forget.
She sat wrapped in her blanket, staring out the curtains. Although the morning light was still feeble, it was mandatory for her to squint at the garden below, part of her hoping to see a glint of colour from the earthen ground.
The said time capsule was a yellow box she had haphazardly thrown together.
It had been a split second decision to cope with everything that had happened. Exactly two years ago she had snuck out of her bedroom window at two in the morning, hiccupping and coughing in the cold harsh air that froze her lungs whenever she inhaled
It was more than reckless.
She remembered not being able to see a thing as she dug up the wet soil, eventually with her hands once she gave up with the rusty shovel that had been sitting in the garden shed for god knows how long. She remembered cursing at the rain, the world, everything that had led up to that moment in her life. She had cursed herself.
Her hands had shook from the mid winter cold, adding to the violent throbbing she felt in her head.
The grief that once came never left her alone.
She snapped back to reality and closed the blinds. Laying down, she silently buried her face in the pillow.
She hadn't been to the rooftop since.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Hiya Eden, it's good to see you again!"
Hanna walked up to Eden and semi hugged her, slapping a sticker with her name on it on her chest and handing her a lock.
"Lei and Nik are already here, we saved a locker for you." Hanna smiled and grabbed Eden's wrist, dragging her through various swarms of people and a few teachers until they reached the other two girls who were sitting down on wooden seats near the library
Nikita was on her phone, giving a little wave as she saw Hanna approach Eden. Lei had been picking at the charms on her bracelet, until she stood up and walked over to the girls.
"Awww man I thought I would be the earliest today." Eden frowned and looked down at her watch. "It's 7:20 why are y'all so early-"
"Haha don't underestimate my power, Eden. I was the first one to arrive." Lei looked smug as she feigned a proud stupor.
"Hmph- well anyways-"
Eden plonked down her bag and hugged Lei, eventually persuading Nikita to join so that it was a group hug.
"I missed our hugs."
"Eden, we saw each other last week-"
"I still missed them." Eden squeezed Lei a little harder for a split second before letting go.
"So, where's my locker supposed to be?"
As Lei recovered from the hug and started walking towards their locker area, she started garnering her excitement. Eden could tell she wanted to start a new story for herself this term, leave that behind once and for all.
Her smile seemed to be...genuine. For the first time in a long while, Eden realised.
Eventually, as all things go they linked arms. This would have been all fine and dandy if Nikita wasn't shouting at them from behind, being forced to lug Eden's bag up for her.
Lei didn't look back once, smiling as Eden simply stuck her tongue out at Nikita's feeble attempts.
They snickered together as they skipped up the flight of steps.
The skipping came to a halt when they neared the new locker area. It was in front of the brand new resource centre, framed by tall trees and perfectly manicured bushes that led to the entrance of what would be her year groups area for the next two years.
They walked in through the entrance and were immediately met by noise.
It was simply buzzing.
Lei and Eden unlatched their arms, and Eden stepped forward taking in the new place. It could be an experience for sure.
She was smiling when it happened.
Lei had been walking, turning around to face Eden when she bumped into a tall figure. The collision caused her to trip over Eden, who stumbled, yet managed to brace the both of them by clinging onto a locker.
"I'm sorry-"
"I-'
Kash and Lei both stood facing each other, the sentences cut off as they both realised.
A split second of silence.
"I'm sorry, excuse me."
Kash stalked off past them, head bowed as he headed down the staircase the girls had just walked up from.
Tight lipped, Lei walked forward till they reached a set of lockers lined up in a row.
"This is our area. Put your sticker in there so Yate's knows it's yours."
Just as the mention of him left Lei's mouth, the head teacher caught their attention by seemingly startling a poor student to attention.
Lucas remained slouchy with his hands in his pockets. His bag was strewn over his shoulder as the teacher talked to him. For a moment, he met eyes with Eden. She tipped her eyes away, focusing her attention on Lei.
When she looked back, he was looking at someone else.
The girls shakily laughed it all away as if it was a dream; nothing more, nothing less.