Red Vs Blue: The Blood Gulch...

By blueflameknight

15.6K 460 138

Welcome to Blood Gulch. Where there are two opposing sides that are in a war, the Blue Team and Red Team, and... More

Callan's Bio (Season 1)
S1 Episode 1: Why Are We Here?
S1 Episode 2: Red Gets A Delivery
S1 Episode 3: The Rookies
S1 Episode 4: Head Noob In Charge
S1 Episode 5: The Package Is in the Open
S1 Episode 7: Check out the Treads on That Tank
S1 Episode 8: Don't Ph34r The Reaper
S1 Episode 9: After Church
S1 Episode 10: A Shadow of His Former Self
S1 Episode 11: Knock, Knock. Who's there? Pain
S1 Episode 12: Down, but Not Out
S1 Episode 13: Human Peer Bonding
S1 Episode 14: Roomier Than it Looks
S1 Episode 15: How the Other Half Lives
S1 Episode 16: A Slightly Crueler Cruller
S1 Episode 17: Points Of Origin
S1 Episode 18: SPF 0
Season 1 Finale: Last One Out, Hit the Lights
Callan's Bio (Season 2)
S2 Episode 1: Everything Old Is New Again
S2 Episode 2: Motion to Adjourn
S2 Episode 3: Red vs Bleu

S1 Episode 6: 1.21 Giga-Whats??

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By blueflameknight

We cut to the middle of Blood Gulch where we see Church has watched up with Donut and aims his rifle at him

Church: Freeze!

Donut: Hey, why the hell were you shooting at me? You could've hit me, dick!

Church: Can it. Don't try to play stupid with me, Sarge. I know who you are. We've been spying on you for three weeks now.

Donut: I just got here two hours ago, and I'm not a sergeant, I'm a private

Church: Wait a minute, you're not the sergeant!

Donut: Yeah, that's what I just said

Church: Well, then how the hell did you manage to steal our flag

Donut: Steal? I have no idea what the hell you're talking about!

Suddenly a soldier in black armor appears between them

???: THREE!

Church: JESUS!

Donut: HOLY SHIT! Who is this guy?

Church: What in the hell? Tucker? Is that you?

Tucker: H-how did you get up here ahead of me?

Donut: And what's with that black shit on your armor?

Tucker: (Looks at Donut) Hey! Freeze, Sarge!

Donut: Would you stop calling me a Seargent? I'm still just a private

Tucker: The sarge is still a private? Oh, my god. The teleporter sent me back in time!

(Meanwhile: Red Base)

We cut to Red Base where we see Lopez working on the Puma until Grif enters the driver seat and suddenly music starts to play and Callan enters the passage seat.

Grif: (Looks at Lopez) Hi, Lopez. We need the jeep

Callan: It's sort of for an emergency

Simmons: I'll take the gunner

Simmons enters the gunner's seat

Simmons: Let's roll

Grif: (Starts to drive) How do you turn off the fucking radio?

Callan: I don't know. I'll try to fix that later

Simmons: Don't worry, Lopez! I'll bring her back in one piece!

Callan: You mean we?

Simmons: Ye-yes

(Meanwhile: With Tucker And Church)

Tucker: (Rambling)Look, I know you don't know me, but you have to believe what I'm about to tell you. Sometime in your future, I get stationed here in Blood Gulch, and we meet.  And this guy here, he gets promoted to sergeant of the Red Army, and we spy on them. And they get this new jeep, and I'm all like, "There is no way you can pick up chicks in a tank!"

Church: Tucker, what the fuck are you babbling about?

Tucker: I know all this sounds crazy, but he eventually becomes a Seargent, and then one day we get a tank, and he comes and steals our flag while we're distracted!

Donut: (Looks at Church) Is this guy a retard?

Church: Red, shut up (Looks at Tucker) Tucker, listen to me. You haven't gone back in time, okay? (Music starts to be heard) This is the guy that stole the flag, he's just not the Seargent! (Music gets louder) Turns out he's just some dumb rookie who happens to have the same color armor as him (Music gets louder) He got in somehow, just- (Music gets more louder) FOR GOD SAKE, WHAT IS THAT MUSIC?!

Church and Tucker then look in the direction where the music is coming from and a Puma jumps over the hill

Grif: Woohoo!

Callan: Suprise mother fucker!

Tucker: Holy shit!

Church: Son of a bitch! RUN, JESUS, RUN!

Church and Tucker then begin to run toward the cliffs

Tucker: The jeep followed me back in time!

Simmons then begins to fire the machine gun at them while Callan fires his magnum at them

Church: Ow! Jes-! Ow! Jesus! Ow, ow!

Grif Gets off the Puma and Looks at Donut while Simmons starts to shout something at the blues in the background

Grif: What the hell is going on here?

Donut: You know what, I honestly have no idea what's going on. I think everyone in this canyon is absolutely insane

Callan: (Keeps on firing) How did you get the flag?

Donut: I don't know. I just asked for it

Callan: (Stops firing) And it worked?

Donut: I guess. Is it not supposed to?

Grif: I don't know. We've never even thought to try that. Just take the flag to the base, I'll explain there

Donut: Not until someone tells me what the fuck is go-

Callan: For the love of god! Move rookie! Head to base! Now!

Donut: Fine!

Donut then leaves but in the wrong direction

Grif/Callan: "Annoyed Sigh" Back to our base, dumbass!

Donut: Uh, I know. I just got turned around, that's all

Donut then leaves but this time in the right direction

(Meanwhile: Blue Base)

We cut to the top of blue base where we see Caboose looking through the sniper as he sees Church and Tucker cornered

Caboose: Oh, man. That's not good (Looks at the Puma) Oh my god, that jeep has a really big gun. (Puts the sniper away) Stay here (Looks at the tank) Tank. Stay here. Tank. Ah, screw it.

(Meanwhile: With Church and Tucker)

Church: Well, just wait here. That thing's gotta run outta bullets some time

TO BE CONTINUED...

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