By the time you had overcome your shock and made sense of what had happened, Reiner had been nowhere to be seen.
You would have taken offense in his outburst hadn't you been aware of the depths of his anguish and what truly tormented him. But your fear for his well-being had prevented any resentment or grudge from arising, and you had followed after him, eventually spending the rest of that night by his side.
After what had felt like an endless loop of unstable memories and consuming visions, Reiner had been able to get some semblance of rest.
He had felt disoriented upon waking up the next morning and, as he had slowly recovered his senses, soon declared himself sound and ready to bounce back.
You didn't understand how he did it—how he managed to flip a switch and build these walls around himself. It was tragic, really. But you had known better than to be fooled by it again and, despite his protests, had taken it upon yourself to send word to Magath that Reiner wouldn't be able to perform his duties at the HQ due to illness.
Moreover, knowing how delusional his mother still was, entrusting him to her was unthinkable. And so, you ensured to visit every day lest he crumbled again and let something dangerous slip around her.
Used to bottling everything up and downplaying his issues, Reiner didn't see the need for time off and was awkward about your excessive nursing at first. He didn't believe he deserved it, but there was only so much he could do against your stubbornness, and therefore allowed himself to indulge in your care.
A couple of days with you around his house from morning to evening already had Reiner seeing you in a different light.
His self-reproach and the nature of your relationship so far hadn't allowed him to venture into any other desires. But as he observed you comfortably strolling around the living room, taking your liberty in the kitchen as if it were yours, and seamlessly conversing with his mother and family, he found himself unable to keep his thoughts in check.
The striking growth of your figure stirred urges he'd never gotten the chance to delve into before, but your effortless bearing had him fantasizing about something more noble and profound. He pictured a life where this mellow domesticity and this warm and peaceful atmosphere would have been his routine. A life where he wouldn't have had to seek approval from anyone because he would have been accepted and loved for who he truly was.
To think that everything he could have needed was at arm's reach, that this could have been his reality had he only listened and taken the time to see through his childish dreams was simply cruel.
These ruminations weren't one-sided.
In that setting, you caught a glimpse of that future you'd always wished to build with Reiner, but unlike him, experiencing what you now could never obtain had the reverse effect on you. And instead of appreciating these moments, you were left more dismayed than you'd like to admit. It was pointless to let this get to your head; you had long come to terms with the fate of your relationship. But it was stronger than you.
The sentiment only festered the longer you were there, and when Reiner was finally summoned at the HQ a few days later, you couldn't have been more grateful.
You couldn't distance yourself from him at once, though. It was nonsensical, and even in your most bitter states, you knew it. In all honesty, you didn't even want to; the need to still be around him stemmed from your intrinsic sadomasochism. So, you accompanied him on the evening walks, but you were sullen, edgy, snappish, and didn't even bother hiding it.
You drew satisfaction from him noticing your tenseness and asking about it, only to inflict pain upon yourself by brushing it off and claiming that nothing was wrong whenever he did.
Having apologized for his harsh words to you during his meltdown, Reiner couldn't think of anything else he'd done since that would justify your attitude. His qualms took the backseat as he occupied himself with solving your mystery, and much to his surprise, it was a much welcome distraction.
The chase was thrilling and made it seem as if the barrier defining your relationship had vanished—as if you had finally overstepped that tacit but ever-present boundary. Your interactions became lighter as well and gave him to understand the same.
For the first time, it felt like you were a normal couple with normal lives and ups and downs.
Your conduct was reflexively intended to get a rise out of him, but it was all beyond delightful and amusing to him. And to say that his composure in response to it frustrated you would be an understatement.
It was a Saturday morning that you found yourself wandering around town with Anabella. You weren't keen on going out at all, but staying at home with your mother who kept meddling in your affairs and asking about your developments with Reiner was far worse.
Although Anabella wasn't any different herself, she at least knew when to take a hint, and a couple of terse replies were enough to silence her on the subject.
Halfway into your stroll, you came across Reiner. He hadn't seen you at first, but your clown of a friend made sure you didn't remain unnoticed.
Approaching you, he greeted Anabella before addressing you, "I was actually on my way to see you."
"Don't you have work?"
"Commander Magath let us go early since the festival's tomorrow."
This piqued Anabella's interest. "Only you, or...?"
"Everyone. The others stopped at the bakery." Reiner pointed behind him. "And Colt is with them."
"I just remembered I need to get bread too."
"No, you don't," you said, linking arms with her.
"I do. See you later! Oh, Reiner, make sure to walk her home when she's done."
You sighed as you watched her skip away.
"Were you going somewhere?"
"The fabric store," you replied, and he gestured for you to lead the way.
Aside from the usual inquiries about your health and news since you'd last spoken, not much was said as you weaved your way through the alleys to reach the shop. When you got there, Reiner loitered by the doors, following your interaction with the owner, a young man a few years older than you, who was patiently showing you a new collection of textiles.
When your purchases were made, Reiner held the bags, and you set off toward the sewing shop for some matching threads.
You were all set and done half an hour later, and on your way back home, Reiner spoke up, "That first seller, have you known him for long?"
"Ever since he took over his father's business a couple of years ago."
Reiner hummed.
"Why do you ask?"
"Nothing, he just seemed like a good guy."
"Yes, he is nice and good at his job."
"Looks like he's into you."
You quirked a brow at him. "I haven't noticed. But does that bother you?"
Reiner smiled but said nothing.
The topic was increasing your silliness, however, and you didn't waste your chance to ask, "What about you? Did you have someone you liked while away?"
"There was one girl I thought was cute," he admitted. "I mentioned her, actually. Krista?"
"Oh, the one from the noble family," you recalled before mumbling, "Well, good for you."
When you reached your house, Reiner stood beside you as you angrily rummaged through your satchel for your keys. Chuckling lightly, he offered his help but only received a glare in return.
"Am I going to see you this evening?" he asked when you opened the door and turned to take your materials from him.
"I don't know."
"Come on, are you still jealous?"
"That's implying I was in the first place."
The corners of his lips curled slightly as he moved to tower over you, placing an arm against the doorframe while his broad back blocked the outside view. "You weren't?"
"What are you doing?" you whisper-yelled. "Get off before someone sees us."
Leaning closer, he reiterated his question, voice ice-cold and demanding, and you could swear a chill ran down your spine. Your breath caught in your throat as you held his stare and let out a shaky, "No."
Content with your reaction, his smile broadened as he stood upright. "I'll stop by later anyway."
You nodded clumsily and, abruptly spinning around, were stopped when he called out your name and handed you your bags.
Your face caught on fire.
Before you could vanish inside and stop embarrassing yourself, however, your mother emerged into the hallway, dashing toward you at the sight of Reiner.
"Would you care for some tea?" she offered after greetings were made.
"No, he was leaving."
Your mother gasped, sternly reprimanding you for your lack of manners.
"Yes, ma'am, I'd love some tea," he agreed with a faint smirk, earning an exaggerated eye roll from you.
While she saw Reiner inside, you excused yourself and made a beeline for the sewing room where you dropped your supplies. Still dazed, you went to your room to change and give yourself a few moments to regain your composure.
Reiner had been politely humoring your mother in her rambling when you finally joined them in the dining room, your appearance directly capturing the entirety of his attention.
Your button-down dress didn't reveal much more than the garments he'd seen you don so far but still accentuated your form to perfection. It clung to you in the right places, leaving so little to his imagination as he drank you in, and he had to check himself to tear his gaze off you and pay heed to your mother, or at least pretend to.
She fled to prepare the tea shortly after, leaving you to sit in uncomfortable silence. You were still hung up on the way his husky voice had reverberated to your chest earlier, and he was trying to keep his thoughts from running astray.
Upon her return, your mother's nuisance was, for once, welcome as it outshone the palpable tension in the air. She spoke of the festival and what a great honor it was that the Tyburs and Marley chose Liberio for its location.
As he sipped his tea, Reiner was forced to agree with every praise she made and even add a few of his own, and you did not miss the opportunity to taunt him for it. Your mother remained as clueless as ever, hushing you in her typical manner, but Reiner would only smile in return, a glint you couldn't quite decipher in his eyes.
At one point, one of your comments made him look down and bite his bottom lip before he stood to take his leave.
"Nonsense, you have to stay for lunch."
"Another time." He turned to you. "I'll see you tomorrow."
Wasn't he going to stop by this evening? Had you affronted him? Though disappointed, you nodded nevertheless.
Your mother was as insistent as ever, however, and asked him to repair a few things around the house before he left. You quickly intervened, assuring him that there was no need.
"Oh no, it cannot wait. Let him fix those racks for you so you can organize your supplies. They're all over the place."
"No need to hold Reiner back. I'll get someone to do that later."
"It's okay. I can do it."
"Thank you, son."
With a sigh, you fetched the toolbox and guided him to the kitchen first where he fixed a few loose hinges and drawers before moving to your sewing room.
The task now at hand being more exacting, Reiner discarded his coat and tie while you perched on your desk to watch him work. Though you'd seen him in nothing but his shirt while at his house, the labor made his muscles flex in a very attractive way, and you soon found yourself struggling to curb your thoughts.
It took a little over half an hour for all chores to be done, and when you were satisfied with the result, he washed his hands in the bathroom and came back to retrieve his clothes.
While he was fixing his tie, you spoke up, "Are you still going to stop by this evening?"
"Do you want me to?"
"Just asking 'cause you'd said you would but then changed your mind," you whispered. "And you seemed so eager to leave too. If something I said upset you, then I'm sorry. You know I just like pulling your leg."
"No, it's not. But I just thought maybe I should give you some space."
"I'm gonna get plenty of that when you're gone."
Reiner stared at you in silence before slowly approaching you. You looked down, fiddling with the fabric of your skirt. He tucked your hair behind your ear, his knuckles gently traveling to caress your jaw and cheekbone.
"Is this why you've been out of sorts?" he whispered, his tone laden with concern.
It was. But it was also much more than just that. But how could you even begin to explain emotions you couldn't comprehend yourself? How could you vent when all of it would only add to his already crushing guilt? But was this how you wanted for it to end?
He intently watched as you struggled to formulate an answer before speaking up again, "And I didn't want to stay for lunch because of your dress."
At this, you glanced up with a frown. "Is it that ugly?"
"No, no, it's beautiful but just too... distracting. And combined with your sharp tongue." He let out a heavy breath. "You're too distracting. All of you. And I can't stop thinking about you and that guy. And how you were talking with him. I don't want anyone else to be like that with you or to see you like this."
With every word of his, your face had grown hotter, and when he begrudgingly parted your legs to stand closer to you, your entire body was in flames.
"I want you to be mine alone," he whispered as he rested his forehead against yours.
Your eyes fluttered shut as your palms sat on his chest, his heartbeat in tandem with your own as you basked in his warmth.
You had never seen him in action and only heard stories about his Titan, but that this sense of serenity could be brought by the same person who laid terror in other places was terrifying. Yet, you wanted nothing more than to stay like this forever, in this bubble, uninterrupted, disregarding your morality, all sins of the past, and every force that was to inevitably drive you apart.
The tips of your noses touched, and before he could kiss you, you were startled by your mother's voice. He promptly recoiled, and you hurried downstairs.
His brain immediately screamed out at him to seize this interruption and leave. He had managed to show restraint for so long. Surrendering now would be unfair to you both. No good could come out of this. It would only make farewell harder than it already was. But you were back before his reason could get through and explained that your mother had called to inform you that she was leaving to run some errands.
"Oh?" Reiner questioned as he watched you lock the door and walk inside. "Then I should probably get going."
"Want me to see you out?" you asked as you regained your spot on the desk.
Whether the temptation in your tone and movements was deliberate or not, he couldn't tell, but he caught it, nonetheless, and its effect was immediate. He drew near you as if you were an irresistible gravitational pull, hands instantly finding their place on your hips.
"I think I can find my way," he said, smiling when you evaded his eye in a brief yet charming display of bashfulness.
Your skin was burning under his lips when they ghosted all over your cheek before reaching their destination and melting against your own.
As if tasting a forbidden fruit, your kiss was chaste and cautious at first. But the initial flavor soon became unfulfilling and gave way to the addictive substance beneath—the one that unleashed your most pent-up cravings. You clung to him for dear life, fingertips massaging his scalp while he swallowed the moans his wandering hands elicited from you.
Every ravenous squeeze of his had you begging for more, and every desperate whine of yours chipped away a sliver of his sanity, causing him to lean forward till you lay caged under his weight. Shockwaves rushed through you when his hand landed on your calf, slithering to the sensitive spot at the back of your knee while his mouth crept to nip below your ear.
You breathed out his name and were caught off guard when he suddenly stopped all motion. With the way he naturally unraveled you, every movement of his seeming calculated and final, you hadn't expected to be met with a blend of vulnerability and self-consciousness in his eyes when he looked down at you.
"Are you sure you—"
"Yes," you cut off. "And you?"
He nodded. "It's just that... I've never really—"
"Me neither," you reassured him.
His shoulders relaxed when you lifted yourself to undo his tie and shirt, and deep groans escaped him when you took your time to explore his collarbones with your tongue. Once the area was branded as yours, you hopped off and guided him to take a seat on the couch across the room, maintaining eye contact as you made an agonizing show of stripping for him.
His heartbeat picked up with every inch of flesh exposed, turning completely erratic when you tossed the last item and sank to the floor before him.
The gratification of submitting to this divine being alone was something you couldn't put into words, but to witness the genuine concern in his expression as he tried to get you to stand had you falling over the edge. At that moment, you would've given him the world if you could; in your eyes, he wholly deserved it.
He eventually yielded and allowed you to undress him as well. His head met with the backrest when your lips started by shadowing the faint marks littering his thighs and torso from his years as a scout. A sharp inhale was taken when you finally took him into your mouth, and he draped an arm over his face when you employed your hands to heighten his pleasure. You were purely driven by instinct and, while it gained you the reactions you'd hoped for, still sought verbal validation now and then. But Reiner was too dazed to formulate any coherent answers about his preferences. He could only nod vaguely, so you let the pitch of his grunts, the rhythm of his respiration, and the bucks of his hips decide the pace of your ministrations. Right before he came undone, however, his fingers wove into your hair, gaze darting to yours, and you pertly held it until he climbed down his high.
Once you had ensured to lick him clean of every drop, he helped you up, raptly gaping at you as if he were in the presence of a deity. Towering over him and recognizing the adoration and utter submission in his hazel eyes was exceedingly heady and gave rise to a new form of arousal. You moved to straddle him, his palms tracing your figure as he devoured your neck before sailing down to tend to your swollen breasts.
Staying still under his intoxicating touch was impossible, and you soon started grinding against his growing erection, hunting the perfect tempo and angle that would send you into overdrive. When you seemed to settle on a pattern of your liking, Reiner grabbed your derrière and helped you maintain it.
"Don't stop," you cried out, and he made it his life's mission, smoothly rocking you against him until you were reduced to a panting, convulsing mess as your orgasm coursed through you. Your legs gave up, and you collapsed against him to ride out the aftershocks while he softly stroked your hair.
"Are you okay?" he asked when you came to a still, breast calmly heaving against his.
Your eyes were charmingly glowing when you sat upright and smiled at him, and he could swear this was the happiest you'd ever looked at him. It was a riveting sight and was made even more so when he told you how beautiful you were, and you shyly glanced away.
Your lusts were all but fully sated, and while this intimacy was pleasant, you longed for more—much more. Your lips found his again, moving with as much familiarity and ease as passion and hunger, and you let them convey what you both seemed too reluctant to state.
When you parted, he sought out consent once more. You knew he was worried about more than just your physical comfort and considered consequences beyond that. But you had been conscious of what you were committing to the moment you'd allowed him back in your life. And though the frustration and distress his presence and your situation brought could become too overwhelming at times, you had no regrets. You assured him that you would be alright, and he pressed no more, only asking you to interrupt him were you to feel any pain.
As you lifted yourself, he eased two fingers in and out of you while your palm worked on his length. When you grew too desperate, you lined his tip with your entrance. You hissed in unison as you carefully inched down, his grip on your hips keeping you balanced and grounded while wary of your winces. Your body needed a few minutes to make sense of the intrusion, and when the ache dissolved into a strangely delectable sensation, you started moving slowly.
With every rise and fall, you took in an inch more of him. You resolved on a steady and fulfilling pace, and he drank in every contortion of your traits as only his name spilled from your parted lips. He allowed you to use him as you pleased, and you alternated from clawing at his shoulders, digging your nails in his biceps, tugging at his hair, to wrapping your hands around his throat.
Reiner would be lying if he said he'd never had dreams of being in this exact position, but it still aroused him more than he thought it ever would.
He let out a slew of curses when you began slamming down on him, effectively throwing what little patience and self-control he had left out the window. He effortlessly rose to his feet with you in his arms before gently setting you down on the cushion. Not without stealing a kiss first, he spun you around and bent you over the couch, your hands propped on the backrest.
He slipped into you again, his movements long-drawn and unhurried at first as he admired your shape from this standpoint, his gaze and touch roaming every inch of flesh they could reach, the approving hums erupting from his chest far too heavenly. He upheld this cadence until he had you pleading for more before digging his fingertips in your love handles and pounding into you.
As he rejoiced in the harmony of your cries, the sound of his skin slapping against yours, and the ripples traversing your derrière with every drive, he could only think of how he wanted—needed—this image to be exclusive to him alone. The thought of you like this before anyone else had his vision smeared with red, and, high on his possessiveness, he yanked your hair to reveal your face to him.
Hips still unrelenting and with a firm hold around your neck, he rasped, "Who do you belong to?"
You wouldn't have let this slide under any other circumstance, but all it did now was turn you on beyond imagination, and you replied with a knowing smile. But words were what he wanted, and he tightened his hold around your throat as he ordered you to speak.
The motion made all language escape you, however, and it wasn't till his tone and grip switched from demanding to hopeless that you obliged, professing that you were his and belonged to him.
Tipping forward till he was flush with your back, he nuzzled your temple, a relieved sigh escaping him as he slowed down, momentarily lost in connotations and reveries of your concession before resuming his onslaught.
You were certain your body would regret this the day after, but for now, your brain was too entrapped in the overload of pleasure to react to the pain. And so, in exchange for his unwavering and relentless thrusts, you rewarded him with your sensual moans and pleas as you both chased your second releases.