A full day passed before Cinere showed herself to him again. Felix spent that time resting; he slept well into the morning of the day following his visit to the inner wall, and remained off his feet for an extra hour before he could finally convince himself to be productive. He wandered around the city for the remainder of the day, making a mental map of its layout as he familiarized himself with Crocea. Although, ultimately, his best course of action would be to find out where the hole in the inner wall was from the outside and sneak in that way, his concern was the "barrier" Cinere spoke of. Her explanations were vague and full of holes, yet the seed of worry had sprouted anyway.
But if the solution was her bracelets, perhaps if he befriended her and played along with her request, he could get his hands on one of them. She seemed willing to give up whatever he wanted in order to get him close to Aiko, though he couldn't understand her reasoning. Did she not care what he did to Aiko? Or did she want him to carry out his original task?
He cursed her solid blank that smiled back at him eerily when he tried to pick it apart. Everything about her was contradictory and twisted his heart painfully, and yet he continually walked the line beside her. If he could make use of her, he could increase his chance of success with Aiko's assassination. He would avoid the mistakes he had made as a kid, and would make his master's spirit proud. If he could just make use of Cinere's twisted ways.
When night fell again, he returned to his room. Though he planned to sleep as soon as his head hit the pillow, he found that the empty static of his mind was too loud and rest never came. He lay awake, staring blankly at the ceiling above him.
Am I doing the right thing? he asked himself, desperately hoping that someone would answer this time. If I do this, I won't have to kill anymore, right?
He lifted his hand above his face, tracing the scars across the back with his eyes. Tonight, the blood stains did not appear as he looked at his hands, but he could almost feel the stickiness against his skin, the resistance of his knife as he sliced through flesh. He clenched his teeth, swallowing hard against the dizziness that slammed into him and the sour taste that coated his tongue.
If I commit to this dance with Cinere and accept this task from Dinah, if I stain my hands with Aiko's blood, I will be free, right?
Sighing, he closed his fingers into a fist. In the dark, he could barely make out the shape of his hands to project the blood onto. Maybe it was better that way. Was that not freedom in some way?
Dimly, he thought back to the lights he had seen in the castle windows. The flames flickered as they looked over the sleeping city of Crocea. They cast their warm light upon him, illuminating his hands so that the blood would show again.
Somewhere behind those stone walls, safe in the presence of that candlelight, Aiko slept soundly through the night. Like any victim, she was oblivious to him and what he had come to do.
And yet, the light of her palace fell upon him, pinning him beneath it with the image of his bloodstained hands.
As he laid his fist against his chest, he let his eyes flutter shut. His thoughts blurred into silence. This time, sleep sunk its claws into his subconscious and pulled him into the depths.
⇠⭑⭒⭑⇢
The moment Felix stepped out the door into the bright, morning sunshine, his gaze landed on Mae, sitting gracefully on the cobblestone in front of him. He was easy to spot against the stone—brilliant white against dull gray. The cat dragged his head upwards, his piercing blue eyes landing on Felix's. He rose to his feet, lashing his tail irritably. Without waiting for Felix to follow, Mae scampered away, turning down an alley and vanishing from sight.
Glancing down the empty street to make sure no one was watching, Felix followed after the cat. Cinere had told him before to always follow Mae if he should show up. Now that he was actually doing it—turning corners into shadowed, cramped spaces that looked eerily similar to where he would have cornered his victims when he first started working—he felt a flicker of unease. It started as a cold feeling against the back of his neck, then traveled down to the tips of his fingers until they curled tightly against his palms on instinct. Cinere's words suggested she needed him, and he clung bitterly to that hope as he trailed after her cat.
The outer wall drew closer and closer as he emerged into the market near the gate. As it was still early in the day, there were only a handful of people wandering up and down the streets this time. The warm scent of freshly baked bread hung in the air, mingling pleasantly with the quiet that lay suspended over the stalls. He made a mental note to himself as he turned to find Mae waiting at the end of the street. Though it was probably irrelevant to his task, he filed it away. Perhaps he would return to Crocea when he was free.
He stopped short, his steps halting as his conscious thoughts caught up to his unconscious thoughts. A sickening wave of nausea rolled over him. If you kill the princess, there likely won't be a Crocea for you to return to. And if you do return, how long do you think it will be before you're caught?
He quickly shoved that thought away and hurried after Mae.
The cat led him through the gates to the road that traveled away from the city and the forest that lined each side of it. Dark clouds gathered on the horizon, far off in the distance. He came to a standstill at the opening of the road, his boots scraping against the dirt. A storm. How fitting.
Cinere's childish giggle drifted toward him. His breath caught in his throat as he spun around, his gaze landing on her. She was leaning against the wall, one foot crossed over the other, her arms pinned against the stone behind her. She smiled warmly at him as she pushed herself away from the wall and came toward him.
Today, her long, mahogany brown hair was braided down her back, woven with ribbons of gold. She wore a vibrant red dress, with a full skirt that flared outwards as she twirled to show it off. Gold ribbons crisscrossed down her back, cinching the bodice tight against her slim figure. Once again, all that remained entirely the same were the gold bands clamped around her wrists and the calculating blank look in her hazel eyes.
"Miss me?" she asked, standing in front of him with her head tipped to the side. "I didn't think you would really follow Mae. I was going to come look for you at about noon."
The tips of his ears warmed with embarrassment. "I'm acting on your request and you told me to follow the cat." It was somewhat of a habit to do whatever was asked of him by a commissioner while he was on a job. He silently cursed himself. Cinere hadn't commissioned him, and he already had his hands full with one job. A job she was trying to latch onto and profit off of. A job he had staked everything on.
If Master could see me now... he would be thoroughly disappointed.
Cinere smothered another bout of girlish laughter behind her hand. He stiffened, forcing himself to remember it was all part of her blank. "And who was it that told me to be wary of strangers?" she asked with a sly smile, fixing her hazel eyes upon him. This time, the flame burned brighter behind her gaze. "Don't tell me you're being unfaithful to your princess now."
"I'm not courting her, I already told you that." He paused for a moment, then added, "And I don't plan on it."
Cinere shrugged. "If you say so."
"I do."
She waved her hand dismissively as she moved past him. "No matter. I didn't bring you out here this morning to talk about Aiko and you, I brought you here to show you something." Glancing down at the cat, she gestured for him to lead the way.
Mae paused for a moment, his eyes narrowing as if he was thinking about disobeying. Deciding against it, he hauled himself to his feet and padded off down the road. He took a sharp turn and cut across it, vanishing into the undergrowth of the forest. Cinere's gaze lingered on Felix for a moment as she flashed him another one of her smiles before she followed Mae's lead.
Felix froze. Straightening his spine, he glanced back at the towering spires of the palace in the distance. Now that he knew about it, the barrier shimmered in the sunlight. It was faint, but it was there. Weariness tugged at his body, throwing a thick blanket of hopelessness over his thoughts as he looked at it.
It was unfair of him to underestimate Aiko and Niveus. Perhaps he had grown too used to the corruption that was rampant throughout Furvus's cities. It was almost too easy to kill in Furvus, like the world was molded around the idea of profiting off another's death.
If he had known there would be magic involved, if he had known he would be relying on a blank he couldn't trust to get him what he wanted, if he had known it would be so difficult, he never would have accepted.
If I go home now and accept failure, will I face punishment? Or will Dinah simply move on to another assassin?
The image of the snake—readying itself to strike—flashed in his mind again. Dinah's words could not be trusted. She didn't say it, but he could only assume he could not come back until his blade was stained with Aiko's blood. Only when her face was numbered among the other thirty-four who faced death at his blade could he return to the kingdom his master had loved so much.
He turned back to Cinere, who hadn't stopped to check that he was following. His gaze trailed down to her wrist at her side, bound by the gold cuff. Like the barrier, it shimmered with a faint glow of magic.
He had no choice but to follow her.
Before he even had a chance to fully process this, his feet were already moving. Ahead, Cinere was swallowed by the thick greenery of the forest, the bright red of her dress sliding between the cracks in the underbrush as she moved. He jogged after her, determined not to lose her to the forest this time. She looked up at him as he matched his pace to hers, walking carefully by her side. The flame in her eyes wavered for a moment.
"Can you tell me a bit more about magic?" he asked, forcing his voice to raise with a bit of excitement. His blank held firm, though his chest tightened slightly at the thoughtful frown that formed on her lips. "It's interesting to me. I'd like to know more about it—as well as that burnt section of the forest you showed me that day."
"Ah." She looked away. Dappled sunlight trailed across her face, catching on the gold ribbons in her hair. "Divine punishment," she murmured. "It's the darker side of magic."
"And that would be...?"
She hummed to herself as she maneuvered around a tree in their path, trailing her hand across the bark as she passed. "They say Aiko tried to forcibly remove herself from the curse. There must have been some kind of trigger in place that was activated. It's a bit unclear," Cinere said. "There's another version of this story in which someone tried to kill her. The curse rebounded, and the assassin was murdered instead. It all happened before I came to the palace, and it must be quite the story as no one wishes to speak of it."
Felix flattened his expression into a glare, though his heart shuttered at the image of the burnt forest. "You could just say you don't know. That's fine sometimes."
She chuckled, wagging her finger. "Once again, you seem to forget the beauty of suspense. I am a seer. I crave an air of mystery, dear Kou."
Felix arched his brow. "Kou?"
"Oh, that's my nickname for you." Cinere grinned childishly, her eyes gleaming. "Since you refused to tell me yours, I made one up for you—ah, see, you do understand mystery! Well, somewhat."
A puzzled frown found its way to both his blank and his true expression beneath it. He wasn't sure he understood Cinere's ideal of mystery—if anything, it was both amusing and frustrating—but he had become cautious about his name. In Furvus, it was rare to meet anyone who didn't know him. Niveus offered a fresh start, a place where he could simply be no one. If Cinere was close to the princess and knew his name, she could spread the word that Felix, an assassin from Furvus, had murdered Princess Aiko of Niveus.
Aside from that, however, some small part of him relished the idea that he was no one to Cinere. The chance was slim, but still possible that she would have heard of Furvus's renowned assassin, Felix himself. But if she was too busy coming up with new names for him, perhaps she wouldn't care so much for his true name.
"Was it necessary?" he asked.
She looked away, puffing her cheeks in a pout. "I got tired of thinking of you as the unnamed man, what was I supposed to do? You were being stingy."
"Someone told me to value suspense and mystery more. I took her words to heart."
Cinere's pout morphed into a disapproving frown. "Cheeky, aren't we?"
A few feet ahead, Mae poked his head out of the tall grass and gave an impatient meow. With that, he vanished into the undergrowth again, though the tip of his tail stuck up every time he bounded forwards. As Felix followed him, darkness settled in over the forest. The sunlight was swallowed by the thick canopy overhead, and thunder rumbled in the distance. He glanced upwards, hoping for a sight of the clouds overhead, but the leaves had grown too thick to peer through.
"You wanted proof of magic, right?" Cinere passed him, her steps as graceful and lithe as her cat. Practiced, poised, perfect—just like the rest of her. She glanced over her shoulder at him. Her teasing smile had vanished, replaced instead with a sharp, serious look. As the forest around her grew darker, the flame in her eyes burned brighter.
Felix curled his fingers against his palms. He had never seen someone with such a bright soul before.
"Is this the place where I met you?" he asked.
She turned away, chuckling slightly under her breath. "That's a bit farther from here, but most of this forest is the same. Have you ever wondered why it still exists so close to the palace? Why I said what I did that night?"
It stokes the fires of the soul. "Some explanation would be nice."
"How about a demonstration?" she asked as she came to a stop, turning to face him with that empty gleam in her eyes. "I prefer demonstrations over explanations; words are nothing in the face of action, yes?"
For someone who lies with every breath and can't even show me what she really feels, that's quite the bold statement. Felix shoved the bitter thought aside. He was no better than her. They were two liars, lying to each other as they struggled through the game of life.
"I suppose that's fine," he said slowly, cautiously. He kept his gaze glued to her, watching her just as she was watching him.
Lifting her hand, she offered it to him, her palm facing upwards. "If you would humor me, please."
Felix stiffened, shooting a quick glance down at his own hand at his side. Today, no blood clung to his flesh, but his scars seemed more prominent, etched firmly into the edges of his palm. He couldn't remember ever having held the hand of another unless he clung to his master as a child—he could faintly recall the rough scrap of his master's calloused touch that would guide his strikes when he learned to wield a knife, but that was different.
As much as he was confused by Cinere, he winced at the thought of putting his bloodstained, scarred, and calloused hands in hers. Hers which appeared soft, clean of the blood and pain he endured. He didn't deserve that.
He frowned and the thought fizzled out. What was he thinking?
She dipped her head to the side, her long braid spilling over her shoulders. "Don't be shy. I'm just going to hold your hand, nothing more."
"I just don't want you to cut it off. I like my hand," he said flatly, hoping to smother his moment of stupidity with a joke.
Cinere's laughter drifted through the air, as light and easy as ever. "Of course not," she said with that same blank smile. "I don't want to hurt you. We're in this together, aren't we?"
Felix stamped down on the urge to flash a nervous smile. Subconsciously, his gaze slid over her again, checking for hidden weapons. Either she had none, or they were too well hidden for him to see. He raised his hand and placed it in hers, trying not to think about the probability of Mae having the ability to chomp it straight off his wrist.
The moment his fingers brushed hers, sparks ignited between them. With a rush of air, the world fell to complete darkness. Felix's gut lurched as if he were falling, yet his feet remained planted on solid ground. Cinere closed her fingers around his hand, tightening her grip as if to steady him.
It lasted for only a moment before the world was quiet and still again. Felix found himself gasping for breath, doubled over with one hand against his knee while the other remained encased in Cinere's own.
The forest and the overcast sky had disappeared, replaced by an empty, black scene. Grass shifted beneath his feet when he moved, and he could see the faint outline of the trees around him, but the void had swallowed most of the scene. Flickers of light danced around him like tiny fireflies. They left a trail of flame in their wake, tracing aimless lines through the air as they drifted by. Faint echoes of voices floated toward him, but he couldn't make out any words among the gibberish.
Then there was Cinere.
In the dark, magical world, the flame that burned in her eyes grew stronger, illuminating the two of them in soft, warm light. A similar flame hovered over her chest, right where her heart would be. The fire burned strong and steady, hissing and spitting as if it had a will of its own.
Her soul. He was looking at her soul.
With a jolt, he glanced down at his own chest, searching for a sight of his soul. When he held Mae, Cinere had claimed the flame was weak. It never meant much to him until he was face to face with the image of hers. Was hers powerful like Aiko's? Or was her soul's flame normal?
Unlike hers, the flame that danced in his own chest did so faintly. It was soft and quiet, barely visible in the light of Cinere's. It flickered weakly, casting no warmth of its own. A pitiful thing, completely eclipsed by Cinere's brilliant light.
He truly did possess a weak flame. His breath hitched. What did that mean? Was it because he had killed so many? Did it mean his time was running out if his flame was being reduced to embers?
Cinere squeezed his hand, drawing his attention back to her. There was sincerity in her eyes, and though there was no smile on her face, it was somehow much softer. Clear. Pure. True.
"This is the magic," she said. "The thing that stokes the soul's fire. It's... the world between worlds."
"How did we get here?"
She placed a finger against his chest, right where the flame lingered around his heart. He felt a shudder pass through him at her touch.
"Your soul. Those with weak flames are like keys for humans." She withdrew the hand from his chest and glanced down at where she still clung to him. Her thumb brushed the scars across the back of his hand. "Mae can come and go from here as he pleases—being a magical creature. He wanted to show you."
Felix furrowed his brow. "What is there to show me?"
Cinere looked away again. Still holding his hand, she angled her body toward one of the wisps of flame and held out her free hand, extending a finger so that the flame came to rest against her. "You wished to know more about Aiko's curse and the burnt forest. This place is connected to the Ember Core—it's sustained by it, in fact. Through that, this place is connected to Aiko."
Connected... to Aiko. If he damaged this place, would it damage Aiko? While he was bound to the soul world, could he locate Aiko? He was the weak flame being used to access it, so was he free to do what he wanted? Curious, he started to pull his hand free.
The moment he slipped from her grasp, the connection snapped. Felix stumbled as the physical world slammed into him again. He caught himself against a nearby tree, pressing his hand to his forehead. A splitting headache raced through his skull, creating a painful ringing in his ears.
As it began to subside, he felt the cold touch of rain against his skin. The gentle pitter-patter replaced the constant whispering of the soul world. Glancing up, his gaze fell on Cinere again, drenched in the rain and still standing where he had left her with her hand outstretched.
"Sorry," she said with a sheepish smile, brushing wet hair out of her face. "Should have mentioned you can't take the key out of the lock."
He heaved in a deep breath to calm his racing heart. With a chuckle, he shoved his own wet bangs out of his face. "Some demonstration."
The sincere look vanished and her blank returned, dragging up that teasing, playful smile of hers. The one that tugged painfully at his chest. "Curious? Am I giving you enough breadcrumbs to make you look for more?"
He couldn't deny that there was also curiosity swimming around in the depths of his mind, she had simply channeled it forward. As it consumed the cracks between his other thoughts, he couldn't help but dwell on the fact that she was revealing to him small bits and pieces of some bigger picture. The pieces she handed out did not portray the same image, and they dragged him around in circles like a dog chasing its tail.
He was back to asking himself the same question: what did she really want? Though she kept trying to tie it all back to Aiko and the throne, he couldn't help but feel like he was drifting further away from his purpose.
Maybe he was hooked on the strange blank woman and her warped perception of the world's magic and his soul.
He straightened up, wiping the rain from his face. It did little, as the sky continued to pour buckets through the cracks in the canopy overhead. Cinere had turned, bringing her fingers to her lips and whistling to the empty, dark forest. Mae answered with a mewl, and only a handful of seconds passed before he emerged from the thick, tall grass at her feet. She bent down and scooped him up, tucking his head under one hand to protect him from the rain. With a sigh, she turned back to Felix.
"Does the Ember Core feel believable now? Beyond just a barrier and some... princess's forest?"
He searched her face for some hint as to the kind of answer she was searching for. As always, he found nothing, though she did look small and pitiful when she was soaked by the rain. There was weariness underlining her eyes, and the flame seemed to have darkened slightly. It was almost as if he was peering through a chink in her mask, seeing who she really was beneath it for the first time.
And she was vulnerable.
"It always was," he replied softly. "I don't know why you have to fight so hard to keep me here."
She fixed her gaze on Mae as she began to stroke between his ears. She pressed her lips into a thin line, her forehead creasing as she frowned. "Because I have nothing to offer you," she said. "I simply... don't want Aiko to take the throne while this curse lingers over her. There's something about you—maybe it's your weak flame, maybe it's just you—but I feel that you're the only one who can do it."
Silence lingered between the two of them. Felix mulled over her words, sorting through them for some kind of hidden meaning. She called his weak flame a key, and perhaps its connection to the magic world she showed him had something to do with Aiko.
"So what you really want is for me to help you break this curse?" he asked.
The fire stirred to life in Cinere's eyes once more as a wide grin spread across her face. "Yes! Yes, that's it!"
Felix nodded slowly, puzzling over his options. From the things Cinere had shown him so far, it was in his best interest to help her. If he broke the curse, Aiko would become a harmless target and he could carry out his original task as intended. For him, it was a win-win. The curse would be broken, granting Aiko momentary freedom as Cinere wished, and then, he would kill her while she was vulnerable as Dinah had asked him to do.
It was suddenly so simple. His gaze flicked down to the cuffs around her wrists. "Right," he said. "I'll do it, but I wish to see The Core first."
If he took out this Ember Core—what he surmised was the central focus of Aiko's curse—it would all fall apart. And when it did, he would finally be free.
Oh, look at that. Cinere is bad at communication and she does have feelings. Who knew.
I have to admit I got stuck on this chapter for a little while, and it made me really glad that I was writing it roughly six weeks in advance. I'm projecting that I'm going to have the same struggle with chapter eight, but that's why we have backlog :D
See you in the next update! And thank you so much for reading!