the time has come! let us welcome.. the first HAIKYUU SKIT!!! HOORAY! lettuce begin!!!!!!!!! wait.. before beginning lemme just say, I DO NOT own camp camp, I'm positive it is owned by Rooster Teeth. (link above) anywayz enjoy
Characters:
Max - Tsukishima Kei
Neil - Kuroo Tetsurō
Nikki - Bokuto Koutarou
Ered - Suna Rintaro
David - Takeda Ittetsu
Gwen - Ukai Keishin
Campbell - Ukai Ikkei
Quatermaster - Tanji Washijo
Nurf - Iwaizumi Hajime
Harrison - Oikawa Tooru
Space Kid - Suguru Daishou
Nerris - Kageyama Tobio
Dolph - Akinori Konoha
Preston Goodplay - Kenji Futakuchi
Sheriff Sal - Sheriff Sal
_________________________________________________________________
*Eagle screeching*
Takeda: Can you believe it, Kei? We're getting not one, not three, but two new campers today!
Tsukishima: Yup. It's really, truly horrifying.
Takeda: Horrifying? What, are you afraid of making a few new friends?
Tsukishima: I'm not here to make friends, Ittetsu. I'm here because camp is where kids are sent when their parents don't want to deal with them.
Tsukishima: Why do you think we return the favor when they hit seventy?
Takeda: Hang on a sec, what are you even doing out here?
Tsukishima: Well, it's definitely not because the bus only comes in from the city to drop off and pick up campers
Tsukishima: And so far seems to be my only reasonable method of escaping this fucking nightmare of a camp.
Tsukishima: Definitely not that.
Takeda: Heeeeyy... language.
Tsukishima: Suck a dick—
Takeda: All I want is for you kids to have as much fun as I did when I was a Campbell camper.
Takeda: Is that really too much to ask?
Tsukishima: I refuse to believe someone as happy as you can possibly exist.
*bus honking*
Takeda: *gasp* The bus is here!
Takeda: Hello, welcome to Camp--
*Takeda screaming as he gets hit by the bus*
Washijo: Kids are here.
Bokuto: Ha!
Bokuto: *heavily inhaling*
Bokuto: Oh yeah, smell that nature! Oh that's the stuff.
Takeda: Well hello there, little man. You must be Koutaro.
Takeda: My name is Ittetsu, your camp--
*Takeda screaming in pain as Bokuto bites him*
Kuroo: Um, excuse me?
Kuroo: Is this Science Camp?
Bokuto: No, silly!
Bokuto: This is Adventure Camp. Ad-ven-ture!
Bokuto: My mom said so! Unless she was lying. Again.
Bokuto: Sorry about that hand by the way. Just exerting dominance, you know how it goes.
Takeda: Uh, and you must be Tetsurō.
Takeda: Well, you two will be happy to know that Camp Campbell is both of th--
*Takeda screaming after getting hit by the bus.. again*
Tsukishima: Stupid prepubescent legs!
Washijo: Not today, child. Only one driving this bus is me.
Takeda: Ugh. Thank you, Washijo.
Washijo: You're on your own, now.
Washijo: Going on break, be back for the bus at noon.
Takeda: Kei, you are not leaving my side for the rest of the day.
Tsukishima: We'll see about that, camp man.
Kuroo: So what's your deal?
Tsukishima: *sigh* I'm just a kid trying to survive out here, Tetsurō.
Takeda: Now let's go check out the camp, kids!
*instrumental*
Takeda: The first stop on any good tour is the flagpole!
Takeda: I can't help but give it the official Camp Campbell salute every time I see it.
Takeda: Beside the flagpole is our mess hall, which--
Takeda: Oh! Sorry, saw the flag again.
Takeda: Beside the flagpole is our mess hall, which is connected to the Washijo Store.
Takeda: It's here that we'll serve meals, hold announcements, and occasionally take part in camp activities.
Takeda: Tell 'em just how much you love it, Kei!
Tsukishima: See, that's the sad thing. He still actually thinks that I love it.
Takeda: And who wouldn't?
Takeda: Now, let's step inside and meet my co-counselor Keishin, who's in the middle of a camp activity right now!
Takeda: Oho man, you're gonna love him.
Takeda: Gooood morning, Keishin!
Ukai: Motherfucker!
Daishou: Goooo! Crank it to high, I can take the G's!
Ukai: Hajime, you don't crank shit! Get down from there, Suguru!
Takeda: Oh dear!
Kuroo: What is going on here?
Tsukishima: I'm telling you, if we leave now, I can hot wire that bus.
Bokuto: This is amazing!
Iwaizumi: Buzzkill.
Daishou: Oh-ho.
Daishou: I'm okay.
Takeda: What the gosh darn heck happened?
Ukai: Ugh, Suguru's just, y'know, pushing me to my limits again.
Daishou: I will achieve space flight!
Takeda: Well, we have new campers to introduce and orientate!
Kuroo: Ow.
Ukai: Jesus, that's right.
Ukai: Okay, let's... show them the video.
Takeda: Actually, I was thinking I could play them that song I've been--
Ukai: I'm gonna stop you, right there.
Ukai: No.
Ukai: I'll get the laser disk.
Takeda: O-kay!
Takeda: All you campers head over to the activities field for your afternoon sessions.
*noises of complaint*
Takeda: Uh-uh. Not you, Kei.
Tsukishima: Dammit.
Kuroo: Will someone please talk to me about Science Camp?
Kuroo: None of those kids looked too science-y.
Bokuto: What about that Suguru?
Kuroo: Astronauts, the wannabe jocks of the scientific community? Please.
Takeda: Don't you worry kiddos, this video will explain everything.
Takeda: It was put together by our founder, Ukai Ikkei Campbell, back when I was an eager young camper just like yourselves!
Takeda: he was an absolute legend-- oh, sorry, is an absolute legend.
Takeda: A savvy businessman, extraordinary philanthropist, and one heck of an adventurer if I do say so myself.
Takeda: Oh, it's true, Mr. Ikkei doesn't often have time to come visit the camp anymore
Takeda: What with him travelling the globe and, I'm assuming, saving lives.
Takeda: But! He'll always live on in our hearts and minds.
Takeda: It's like the man always said: We're here to have a great summer, and campe diem!
Takeda: Oh, if only he were here now.
Ikkei: I'm here now.
Takeda: *gasp* Mr. Ikkei!?
Takeda: Wh-- what are you doing here, sir?
Ikkei: *laughing* Well I'm certainly not hiding from any authorities if that's what you're thinking.
Takeda: What?
Ikkei: Haha, come on, Itte!
Ikkei: You think I'd miss the opportunity to welcome our new Campbell campers to Ikkei Campbell's Camp Campbell?
Ukai: You have for years, sir.
Ikkei: Haha, oh Shinki, you slay me!
Ukai: It's... Keishin.
Ikkei: What did I say?
Bokuto: Hey, brawny guy?
Bokuto: This is Adventure Camp, right?
Kuroo: Yeah, so far every attempt to answer our questions just raises more questions.
Tsukishima: Hey, good for you! You're starting to catch on!
Ikkei: Haha, don't worry kids! These two will take you on a tour of our great camp and answer any questions you might have.
*Car screeching*
Ikkei: In fact, we should go on that tour right now, all of us, together, away from this spot.
*instrumental*
Takeda: Here at Camp Campbell, we pride ourselves on the variety of our curriculum.
Ukai: There's Extreme Sports Camp,
Ukai: Magic Camp,
Iwaizumi: *laughing*
Ukai: Space Camp,
Ukai: Theater Camp,
Iwaizumi: *laughing*
Ukai: Art Camp,
Konoha: It's a dog!
Ukai: Other Magic Camp,
Kageyama: Lightning bolt!
Ukai: And lots more. Lots of stuff.
Bokuto: How much more stuff?
Takeda: Well I'm glad you asked, because I have a little song that I can sing--
Ukai: No.
Takeda: When Keishin's not around.
Ukai: By the way, Mr. Ikkei, now that you're here maybe we can discuss just exactly how we're meant to operate at this scale—
Ikkei: Hey, is that kid trying to escape?
Tsukishima: *panting*
*thud*
Tsukishima: If I can just get to that bus before it heads back!
Tsukishima: Ah!
Takeda: Looks like knitting camp wasn't as stupid as someone said, huh Kei?
Tsukishima: You are the bane of my existence.
Takeda: All right now, let's go.
Kuroo: Excuse me, what the hell is this?
Takeda: Ah! I see you found it.
Takeda: That, my friend, is science camp!
Kuroo: But but but-- this isn't what I signed up for!
Kuroo: I just wanted Science Camp, not Science Camp and more! I don't want more!
Ikkei: Well that's why you read the fine print, sport!
Ikkei: See, right there. And more.
Ikkei: Now you can't sue us!
Bokuto: So, what? It's just some sort of Camp Camp?
Ikkei: Well I mean, I wouldn't exactly call it out like that. But yes.
Kuroo: This is bullshit!
Tsukishima: Woah, check out the balls on new kid.
Bokuto: Where?
Kuroo: I don't know what kind of operation you think you're running, but I won't stand for it!
Kuroo: I'm a man of science!
Kuroo: You think you can rummage together some outdated equipment and call it a laboratory!?
Ukai: Look, kid, I know it's not--
Ikkei: Stand down, Keichen.
Ikkei: I'll speak to the children.
Ikkei: Kids, I'm going to be blunt and honest with you.
Ikkei: When I opened Camp Campbell all those years ago, I had one goal and one goal only.
Ikkei: To create the most popular and successful summer camp in the world!
Ikkei: But times have changed.
Ikkei: Things like the internet, video games, and the Affordable Care Act are ruining this great country of ours,
Ikkei: And the children of today just aren't interested in a traditional summer camp.
Ikkei: But America isn't a traditional country!
Ikkei: So why settle for anything less!
Ikkei: You've got two acceptable counselors, one hell of a Quartermaster, and endless possibilities here at Camp Campbell.
Ikkei: And by God, as long as I'm here--
*tires screeching*
*gunshots*
Ikkei: Code black, code black!
Ikkei: Well, look at the time. Gotta go!
Takeda: Sir! Where are you going?
Ikkei: The nearest international waters, Itte. Have a great summer, kids!
Ikkei: *fading away* And campe diem!
*gunshots*
*Tires screeching*
Bokuto: He seems nice.
Ukai: Oh God it's coming back, the crippling anxiety and regret.
Takeda: Uh, Keishin!?
Washijo: Well, time to be getting that there bus back to that there city.
Tsukishima: Tetsurō, that bus is our only chance out of here.
Tsukishima: Do you want to spend the rest of your summer at this godforsaken place or do you want to enjoy the sweet taste of freedom?
Ukai: Why did I get a liberal arts degree?
Kuroo: Let's get the fuck out of here.
Bokuto: Makin' a break for it?
Bokuto: I can make a distraction for you.
Tsukishima: Why would you help us?
Bokuto: I'm an agent of chaos.
Bokuto: Hey Ittetsu!
Takeda: Yes Koutaro!
Bokuto: How about you pick up our spirits with that camp song you won't shut up about?
Takeda: Well that's a great idea!
Ukai: Oh Jesus Christ no.
Takeda: ♪ Ooooohhh ♪
Takeda: ♪ There's a place I know that's tucked away, a place where you and I can stay, ♪
Takeda: ♪ Where we can go to laugh and play and have adventures every day! ♪
Takeda: ♪ I know it sounds hard to believe but guys and gals it's true, Camp Campbell is the place for me and-- ♪
Ukai: The kids are gone.
*thud*
*panting*
Washijo: No running.
(It sucks!) I'm sorry I'm sorry (It always sucks!) I'm--
Washijo: ... No running.
*Kids panting*
Tsukishima: There it is!
Kuroo: They're right behind us!
Takeda: Kei, get back here! You are being a bad influence on our new campers!
Tsukishima: Never!
Bokuto: Kei, hurry!
*dramatic music*
Bokuto: Heee-ya!
Takeda: Oh!
Ukai: Oof!
Bokuto and Tsukishima: *laughing*
Tsukishima: Remember this face, Ittetsu, cause you'll never see it again!
*tires screeching*
Tsukishima: *laughing*
Sheriff: I'm getting real tired of having to come up here, Ittetsu.
Takeda: I know, Sal.
Tsukishima: We were so close!
Kuroo: Well, I mean in hindsight none of us really know how to drive.
Ukai: Yeah, honestly Kei, how far did you expect to make it?
Bokuto: Imma be real, I just always wanted to drive a bus.
Takeda: Well kids, I hope we all learned something today.
Tsukishima: Oh, no. I hope YOU learned, Ittetsu.
Tsukishima: I hope you learned that before today, you only had one little bastard to deal with.
Tsukishima: But now you've got three.
Tsukishima: Let's go, guys. I'll take you to our tent.
Bokuto: Woohoo!
Bokuto: This is gonna be awesome!
Ukai: This is gonna be awful.
Takeda: Oh, come on Keishin! Look at the bright side!
Takeda: Kei made not one, not three, but two new friends today!
Takeda: *screams in Terror and Pain as Ukai beats him with a guitar*
Hope everyone enjoyed this.. I do plan on doing ep. 2 but idk when
anywayz thats all.. for now
PEACE✌😎