"We should date."
Bambam can physically see the moment his statement is taken the wrong way. Lisa's shoulders tense and she swivels around in her spiny chair so she can see the wide-eyed panicked look he accidently put on her face.
"Bam, I- Have you not been listening to me rant the last twenty minutes about how I'm literally in love with Jennie?"
Bambam rolled his eyes and shifted so he was sitting up. It was clear he was going to have to explain himself because Lisa's face was getting redder and the more time she spent being confused, the less likely she was to go along with her brilliant plan.
"No Manoban, I know you're completely gone on her, just the same as you know I'm not into you." He said pointedly. Lisa blinked once before making an 'oh-right' face.
Bambam decides not to be offended about it since he only came out to her two weeks ago but really- does any part of him not scream gay?
"Okay," Lisa says slowly, stretching the word out in that way she did when she was still thinking about what she wanted to say next. "So, you want to 'date' me-"
"Pretend date." Bambam cuts in. The distinction is important. "Pretend."
"Right, right." Lisa nods. "Pretend date. You want to pretend date me, why?"
Bambam sighs because he didn't really want to go into it, but he guesses he owes it to Lisa. Plus, they're like close friends now. Sehun has been telling him that close friends are supposedly able to be trusted with things. Hence his coming out to Lisa two weeks ago.
"Well, you've met my mom." Bambam shrugged and to his amusement Lisa nods furiously. "I'm sure that's all I really need to say."
"Yep, say no more."
"And," Bambam adds, because of course Lisa's selfless ass would agree before hearing how this would benefit her- "It could help you with Jennie."
Just as he predicted, she perked up. "Really? How?"
"A little jealousy never hurt to get someone interested."
Lisa's expression turned thoughtful for a second. "But what about all the-" She makes a face, "-relationship stuff?"
"Well, I don't want to kiss you and you don't want to kiss me and if anyone wants us to, I'll shoot them with an arrow."
Lisa thought about it for a second more before nodding.
"Okay, I'm down."
...
Bambam was underwhelming.
Which was pretty lucky for her, if she had to admit. If she had to fake date- say, Jisoo- her life would be so much more complicated and painful. All Bambam really needed to sell the lie to his parents were a couple Instagram posts, a family dinner and new contact name.
"You should change it to hello handsome." Bambam snorted.
Lisa shoved her a little. "Only if you change mine to Lisa the Lovely."
She walked him to his classes, went to his games and hugged him whenever she saw him. In return, he held her hand at lunch, walked Love with her and scheduled homework 'dates' more often.
All in all, nothing in their friendship changed much, they just got a bit cuddlier and didn't deny the fact that they were dating when people asked.
Lisa was worried that no one except for Bambam's parents would notice until Mina found her in the hallway and threw an arm over her shoulder.
"Lisa! Cous, what is the deal with you and the handsome Thai?" She asked loudly. Lisa stumbled a bit, almost dropping her goddamn textbooks on her foot, but she steadied herself at the last second. "I mean, are you guys 'doing the do' or are you doing the do?"
Lisa side eyed her. "Does anything you say make any sense?"
"It makes sense if you're doing the do." Mina smirked.
"Mina, get off her."
Lisa stiffened and Mina immediately moved her arm and turned, fixing a big smile onto her face. Lisa was about to attempt to book it down the hallway to her fourth period class but Mina grabbed her and spun her around, so she was face-to-face with Jennie.
"Aw, come on Jennie," Mina whined. "Don't you want to know what's going on between our girl and the Thai boy?"
Jennie's annoyed look melted into a slightly curious look and suddenly Lisa wished she wasn't pretend dating Bambam so she wouldn't have to lie right to Jennie's face. Instead of answering, she shoves Mina and frowns.
"Don't talk about him that way."
Mina raised an eyebrow at her. "Oh, I can't talk bad about your boyfriend?"
"No."
Jennie's eyebrows went up and a small wrinkle of distress appeared in her forehead. "Boyfriend?"
Lisa shifted nervously. "Uh- yeah. Boyfriend. Me and Bambam are dating."
Jennie frowned, looking at her a bit closer. "It's Bambam and I." She corrected absently.
"Oh."
Lisa took a step back, her face feeling like it was on fire and Mina, who looked like she was about to say something, closed her mouth with a click. She was also looking at Lisa like something was wrong. Lisa exhaled and forced an embarrassed smile.
"Ah, well, yeah, I've got to-" She gestured down the hall before hurrying to class, leaving Jennie and Mina staring after her.
...
Bambam was actually doing homework for once when Lisa burst into his dorm and face planted onto his bed. Like, she just left her bag on and everything. Just a full face-plant right into his covers.
"You just missed Sehun," He commented casually. "He was heading down to get coffee, you'd better text him your order if you want something."
She mumbled something unintelligible into his navy-blue blanket and Bambam raised an eyebrow.
"Huh?"
"I said- I'm staying here for the rest of my life."
Bambam turned away from his American History textbook to properly look at Lisa's flushed face. "You can't do that. People will think I killed you or something."
"Let them." She groaned, dropping her face back into the bed.
Bambam rolled his eyes at her dramatics and stood. She walked over to the bed and pushed her shoulder.
"Shove over. if I'm going to have an emotional talk with you, I'm going to be comfortable while it happens."
Lisa obediently moves over, keeping her face hidden from him.
"You know, this is Jisoo-level of theatrics." He comments, sitting down next to her head. "What happened? Did you tell someone that we actually aren't dating?"
He keeps his voice steady while he says it, but it makes him so incredibly nervous. If Lisa let it spill to someone that wasn't trustworthy, the whole thing would fall apart, and he'd have to tell his parents the truth.
He'd have to do it eventually, but he was hoping to be able to settle into it for a little bit before needing to.
"No." She mumbled. "You're good."
Bambam internally whooshed a breath of relief. "Okay, what about you? Why aren't we good?"
Lisa is quiet for a second. Just before Bambam worries that she managed to suffocate herself in his bedsheets, she sits up. She's still folded in on herself and looks like she got ran over by a train, but at least Bambam can see her face.
"I just- I didn't think it would be this hard to lie to her." She says softly. "If there's some minuscule chance that she could like me back I don't want the start of our relationship to be based in lies."
Bambam can actually feel his heart softening. Gods, if he had to be in love with someone from the female population, it'd be Lisa. She was quite possibly the sweetest, most honest person he knew. Ever.
If Jennie didn't like her back, Bambam was going to get Jisoo to beat her up.
"Well, if you don't want to do this anymore, we could break up." He offered.
Lisa frowned. "No. I couldn't- no."
"Why not?"
"Your mom Bam." She sighed. "I don't want you to have to tell her something you aren't ready to. It's fine, really, I'll just- I'll avoid Jennie as much as I can."
Bambam wanted to mention that if Lisa avoids Jennie then she isn't actually getting anything out of their deal, but her face held that determined quality to it that remined him of when she managed to convince their university to allow service animals on campus.
A determined Lisa was not going to be persuaded.
By anyone.
"Alright," He said reluctantly. "Come on, let's go walk Love and meet Sehun on the way back. I'll text Rosie and tell her to come to the park. Maybe that will cheer you up a little."
...
Avoiding Jennie was a lot harder than Lisa thought it would be.
She didn't realize just how much she talked to her or saw her in her classes or how her first instinct when something would happen would be to call her.
"I think you just need to come to debate." Rosie offered, completely breaking Lisa out of her thoughts.
"Debate?" Lisa repeated incredulously.
"Yeah, debate!" Rosie grinned. "I've been talking to your dad and-"
"You've been talking to my dad?"
"-he thinks you'd be amazing at it!"
"No, I'm positive I wouldn't."
Rosie gives her a look. "I'm pretty sure you would."
"No, I really wouldn't." Lisa frowned. "I hate confrontation, I have social anxiety and I'm only knowledgeable about four things- I cannot be in debate."
Rosie's expression turned smug as if Lisa just proved herself capable and Lisa rolled her eyes.
"Oh for- you know what I mean!"
Rosie shrugged. "I don't know Lisa; it would definitely help with whatever you're going through." Then she frowned. "Besides, I'm tired of losing debates about technology to Sana."
"What? What do you mean?" Lisa asked, a panicked lilt to her voice.
She sighed. "Well, there's this kid-genius and she's so good at everything that has to do with tech-"
"No, I mean about what's going on with me?"
Rosie paused and got that look on her face like she didn't really know how to phrase what she was going to say next. "Um- well, you just seem- different."
Lisa paused. "Different?"
"Yeah. Different." Then Rosie leaned closer, her eyes turning sympathetic. "Lisa, you know you can tell me anything right?"
"I-"
"Guys!" Sehun cut in, throwing his stuff down onto the library table, making a group of girls shoot a dirty look at them. "Did you know we had a chemistry test tomorrow?"
Rosie sighed heavily like she was a burdened mother and grabbed her own binder out of her bag. "Anyway, Lisa, long story short, join debate. Help me argue this freshman into submission."
...
It's just Lisa's luck that Jennie was sitting in on Bambam's swim practice.
She'd been doing so well; purposefully partnering with Mina so she didn't have to talk to Jennie, taking Love on walks away from their usual route so she wouldn't intersect Jennie's jogging path. She even went to help Jisoo do sets for theater, so she'd have a reason to miss Jennie's coffee date.
But, of course, as soon as she walked into the spectator section to pretend to watch Bambam swim, she could see Jennie already sitting there. And she knew she wasn't there to watch him swim.
"Oh shit, I forgot I needed to-"
"Sit down Manoban." She said firmly. Lisa flinched and she would've made a run for it, if not for the slight waver in her voice.
Lisa walked over stiffly and sat down next to her. Neither of them looked at each other or talked for a moment, both pretending to watch as the swimmers stretched before starting warmups.
"Are you happy?" Jennie asked finally, keeping her eyes glued on the coach.
Lisa faltered. She could see the way her fists were clenched in her hoodie pockets.
She wanted to reach for them.
"What do you mean?"
Jennie turned her head to look at her and Lisa held her breath. She could still do it; run out of here. All she would have to do is drop out of the classes they shared and change her phone number and name and face and-
"Are you happy with Bambam?" She asked again, quieter, as if she didn't want to know the answer. "Does he make you happy?"
What could Lisa say to that?
Was it happiness when she thought about going to Jennie's practices instead of Bambam's? Was it happiness when she'd imagine holding Jennie's hand instead of Bam's? Was it happiness when she was spending every available moment trying to figure out how to avoid the one person she wanted to spend the most time with?
Was she happy?
"Yes." She answered finally. "He makes me happy."
Because he did. Bambam was one of Lisa's closest friends. They did homework together and made fun of baking shows and argued about whether Lisa should dye her hair (again). They messed with Kai and she allowed him to paint her nails and he allowed her to sleep in his hoodie.
He did make her happy.
Jennie continued to study her as if she couldn't believe her. "Completely happy?"
And this time, Lisa's frown came too quick to stop.
"He doesn't." Jennie answered, something unreadable in her tone.
There was another silence in which Lisa half panicked about what to say to Bambam and what Jennie might be thinking and how she could get out of this mess when Jennie leaned over and pressed the briefest of kisses to Lisa's lips.
She immediately pulled away, her cheeks flaming red.
"Je- What? " Lisa spluttered. "I'm sorry, what?"
Jennie shifted like she was the one who was ready to run so Lisa reached forward and grabbed her hands. Her eyes widened and to keep from having to look her in the face, Lisa kept her eyes on their hands.
"No, I mean, I liked it. That was- it was nice. But why?"
Jennie paused. Slowly her palms turned up, so they were holding hands.
"I- I like you Lisa." She admitted softly and it's the softest Jennie's ever heard her. "I know that you're dating Bambam and all and I definitely shouldn't have kissed you but- I just- I really like you. A lot. And it's dumb but Jisoo told me that the first step to getting over someone is to accept rejection." Then she squared her shoulders and lifted her head, unconsciously tightening her hold on her hands. "So, go ahead- reject me."
Lisa...well, Lisa's brain was just about entirely fried.
The girl she liked just told her that she likes her, but she can't tell her that she likes her too because she's supposed to be dating someone else.
Also, Jennie apparently gets dating advice from Jisoo - the world is a weird place.
"I- I can't." Lisa winces.
Jennie's determined expression cracks and she grits her teeth. "What?" Her voice is hoarse and hurt. "Lisa. Now's not the time to be nice! I need you. I- I need you to do this for me."
Lisa squeezes Jennie's hands and closes her eyes in pain. "Jennie," she whispers, "I can't."
"Wha-" Now she's purely confused. "What do you mean? What's wrong?"
Lisa opens her eyes to see her concerned light-brown eyes looking into her. She takes a shuddery breath and pulls Jennie's hand up to her face and kisses the back of it.
Jennie inhales sharply.
"Jen," Lisa repeats, tears beginning to blur her vision, "I can't. "
"You-"
"Yeah."
Jennie's shoulders drop and she leans forward. But instead of kissing her, she pressed her forehead against hers. Lisa can smell the spearmint gum Jennie must've been chewing earlier.
"Lis, I wish-"
Lisa's eyes close. "Yeah, me too." Then she pulls away. Jennie's eyes snap open to watch her. "I can't. But I could. "
"Lisa, you shouldn't-"
"No, you don't understand! I can. I mean, I can't explain why but- " Lisa laughs a little and Jennie sort of looks at her like she's insane, but she doesn't care. That complete happiness fills her up and she leans forward and, gently holding her cheek, kisses her for real.
Jennie immediately melts into it and Lisa was right, she had been chewing spearmint.
Gods, it's her new favorite gum.
She pulls away, ignoring the little part of herself that tells her to keep kissing her. "Jen, meet me at my room tomorrow? I swear I'll explain everything."
She looks dubious but her cheeks were pink, and she was leaning in to kiss her again. "Alright."
...
It goes like this:
"Bam."
"Yeah?"
"Jennie kissed me."
A thud. "Holy fucking shit!"
"I know!"
"Lisa!"
"I know!"
"Lisa, oh my God, I'm breaking up with you!"
She smiles all silly, like a lovesick fool. "Yeah?"
"Hell yeah!" He cheers. "Go get your girl!"
...
And like this:
"Mom? Dad? Can I talk to you?"
"Of course, boy."
"Well, I just- I've done a lot of thinking and figuring myself out and I need to tell you because this is important to me."
"Sounds serious, what's wrong?"
"I- I'm gay."
Silence.
"I only like boys." He clarifies nervously.
More silence.
"Ah. I guess it's better since I get to fight the boy if he breaks your heart?"
"Suho!"
Bambam snorts. "Sure dad."
"There will be nothing of the sort! Bam, we love you very much and that includes who you decide to love."
"She's right. Though I very much liked that Lisa girl."
...
And finally, like this:
"Hey Manoban."
"Jennie," She pressed a kiss to her cheek. "you ready?"
"Oh, you're not avoiding me now huh?" She grins, gently nudging her.
"As if I could."
Love barks and yanks on his leash. Jennie reaches down to pet him with a soft smile.
"Alright, alright, Love, let's go. Besides, now I have to avoid Rosie."
"We better go then. Debate starts in twenty minutes."
Lisa grins and they hold hands as they rush out.
a/n: will be unpublishing some stories heree. im still thinking which ones to keep and which to remove