▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃
▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃
( neil perry x [gn] reader )
WARNING: this imagine includes references
of suicide. if this is a sensitive topic for you,
i kindly suggest not reading. if anyone ever
needs someone to talk to, i'm always here :)
THE BRASH EXIT that your best friend's father had taken through the audience, forcing the brunette to follow behind, caused a feeling a dread and frustration to build up in your stomach.
neil had sent you an apologetic glance as his dad shoved him into the passenger seat of his car, staring down at his lap while you studied his face in concern.
your friends just seemed to brush it off, excluding your apprehensive-looking english teacher and newest friend, todd, who stared after neil's father's car in worry as it speedily drove off.
"is it okay if we walk back?"
charlie's voice coming from right beside your ear caused you to flinch lightly, startled by his sudden action of slinging an arm around your shoulders.
"captain?" he called out to mr. keating, knocking the older man out of his trance as he looked back and gave the group of teens a grim nod.
charlie dropped his arm back to his side, beginning to shuffle down the sidewalk with knox, meeks, and pitts. as he noticed you and todd weren't following, he paused. "guys?"
turning to face the eccentric teen, you gave one last glance at the vehicle growing further and further towards into the distance before lightly tugging on todd's arm, pulling him along with you.
"you think neil's gonna be all right?" the brunette questioned softly, shoving his hands into his coat pockets as you wrapped your arm around his bicep.
"i don't know," you sighed, nibbling on the inside of your cheek. "but, he's neil- he's strong."
a small smile tugged at todd's lips as he nodded, glancing over at your group of friends who were goofing around as they walked. "yeah."
"guys, c'mon! what's taking you so long?"
you and the shy teenager looked up at the voice of charlie coming from down the pathway, his hands cupped around his mouth in an attempt to make his voice project further (not that he needed to, his natural volume was plenty loud enough).
"we're coming, dalton! jeez!"
—
it was silent. really silent.
the snowflakes landing on the outside of your window casted light shadows on the radiator stationed below the glass, fading once the snow melted back into liquid.
you had turned in early when your friends suggested heading to the dead poets' cave, insisting that your social battery had been drained from traveling out into the city and sitting through a three hour play.
granted, it was spectacular, mainly due to the fact that your got to admire at the face of your best friend for hours on end, but the students of henley had worked hard to put together the lovely production; and it payed off.
you were a tad bit disappointed every time neil left the stage, yet still found yourself enthralled even by acts that, unfortunately, didn't include the passionate brown-eyed boy.
after the curtains closed for the final time, you waited with your friends to greet him, but were ultimately disappointed when you spotted his father tugging the boy through the crowd and into his car.
you dialed the perry household on one of the communal phones first thing when you arrived back at welton, trying not to let your nerves grow once you were met with a voicemail.
it was definitely well past lights-out, but that feeling of dread was still gnawing away at your stomach. it caused your overthinking mind to create scenarios that were so farfetched, you could laugh. yet, they still managed to make you worry.
turning over underneath your blanket for the umpteenth time that night, you finally decided to give up, sitting up on the cramped welton-provided mattress as you ran a panicked hand through your hair.
"god, why am i worrying so much?" you muttered, pinching the bridge of your nose as you stepped out of bed, wincing at the harsh coolness of the wooden floorboards against your bare feet.
maybe a walk would clear your head?
sneaking out of your dorm room was an activity that wasn't foreign to you, the lack of a roommate working to make the task easier whenever you and your friends escaped to the wonderland of the dead poets' cave. but today, you were alone.
quickly sliding on your boots and coat, you stealthily slipped out of your room and down the stairs, making sure to avoid the hallway that welton's guard dog was always stationed at.
softly pulling open the door to one of the many side exits of the school, your heart dropped at the high pitched shrill of a phone.
who the hell is calling at this time?!
you inwardly panicked, scrambling towards the ringing phone and reaching a hand out.
before you picked up the receiver, you hesitated, questioning the action. what if it was a teacher, and you answered, and got caught for being out way past bedtime? or what if it was ghost trying to take your soul through the telephone?
deciding that it was better to pick up the call than risk having a teacher come out and find you up, you answered, hoping that the loud ringing hadn't awakened anyone.
disguising your voice in a lower pitch, molding it to fit the stereotypical grumpy old man volume, you greeted, "welton academy."
"(y/n)?"
you felt your mouth grow dry at the low voice, your eyebrows furrowing harshly at the shaky breaths coming from the other end of the call. "wh- neil?"
"yeah," he breathed out, the stress in his voice massively present in his tone.
"how'd you- nevermind, what happened earlier?!" you intensely questioned, holding the receiver closer to your cheek as you wearily glanced around the hall for any teachers. "i tried calling earlier, but no one picked up."
"yeah, i know," neil lowly spoke, sniffling. "my father wouldn't let me pick up, i'm really sorry."
"no, no, don't worry about it," you assured, a breath of relief escaping your lips. "i'm just... glad you're okay."
the brunette stayed silent on the other end, causing your eyebrows to furrow once more. "neil? you there?"
your best friend softly cleared his throat, a light shuffling coming from the other end as he presumably adjusted his position. "yeah- yeah, i'm here."
"are you okay?" you questioned, leaning against the wall as you fiddled with the phone cord before grimacing. "wait, sorry, dumb question."
a small laugh came from neil, but it didn't sound like the perry boy's usual bubbly laughter.
"i'm... not great, right now," he responded. "but, look, i just wanted to... to tell you something."
"what's up?"
the brunette let out a deep sigh, and you could tell that he had ran a hand through his hair apprehensively.
"... neil?"
"i love you."
and for the third time that night, your heart seemed to stop. "you... love me?"
"i—" he paused, letting out another sigh. "i'm in love with you."
"... what?"
"look, things are gonna be different from tonight on," neil explained, stumbling over his words as he searched for a way to properly situate his feelings. "i just... needed to tell you before i—"
he sharply cut himself off, a breath escaping his nose at your silence.
he continued. "you're the reason i was able to stand my father for so long."
" 'was' ?" you repeated, the information that was just flatly laid out on you still working to be processed through your mind. "neil, what're you—"
"he- he's gonna put me in military school," the boy revealed, his voice growing shaky as he held back a sob. "i'm- i'm trapped— there's nothing else i can do, except this."
"except what, neil?" you wearily questioned, kicking off of the wall to cradle the phone to your ear with both hands. "neil, what's going on?"
"tell the guys i'll miss them."
"neil?"
you were met with silence. "neil?!"
"... i love you, (y/n)."
"neil—"
instead of the voice of your best friend coming from the other line, the dull ring of the dial tone sounded through the speaker, your heart buzzing with apprehension as you let out a shaky breath.
"neil?"
but you were only met with a buzz of silence.
~
( ÁNGEL'S NOTE )
i literally made myself sad while writing this, i apologize 🥲 and again, if anyone is going
through anything, no matter how big or small,
my pm's are always open! take care :)