A/N: Alright, so halfway through writing this chapter, I realized I'd been using the incorrect ship name, so from here on out, it's not the Executor (which doesn't come around for like another 20 years), it's the Perilous. Super sorry for making such a silly mistake (still beating my head against the wall about it). Anyway, going forward, that's the place they're trying to get.
Senna huffed in frustration as she tucked yet another rogue strand of hair into the updo that she'd wound her hair in. Sabé had shown her some basic styles that would work with the headband that she'd supplied, but try as she might, Senna was certain that it didn't look anywhere near as elegant as what the former handmaiden had created. She forced a few more pins in place before shrugging. That'll have to do.
She was distracted, and she knew it. She also realized the danger it created, especially tonight, but she couldn't help but let her mind wander back to the single line she'd come across in the Project Phoenix file. I don't even know how we'd go about it. I'll talk to Tech when we get back. Maybe he'll have some ideas. It's still a long shot, but maybe it's something.
They'd landed on Cantonica several hours ago, and everything had gone smoothly despite her fretting. She'd been sure to hide her lightsaber on board the ship before slipping a jacket on and pulling on a set of gloves to hide her metal hand. She and Rex had easily found the hotel that would serve as the site of the gala, and quickly checked in and made their way up to their room. It was the nicest place either of them had slept in a while, and after showering, Rex had flopped down on the massive bed to take a nap. Senna had almost envied how relaxed he was as she had gotten to work trying to make herself look like the elegant, refined wife of an Imperial officer.
Needless to say it had been a struggle.
A knock at the door to the refresher startled her, and she huffed as the brush she'd been using to apply makeup clattered to the floor.
"What is it?" she asked with an air of annoyance.
"Are you decent?" Rex asked through the door.
She glanced at herself in the mirror once more. Sabé had worked wonders on the gown's corset, giving Senna enough room to breathe and maybe even to eat something. The skirt's train was much shorter, but the skirt was long enough to cover the toes of the flats she was wearing. Sabé had packed a beautiful simple silver necklace that was sitting on the edge of the refresher counter next to the gloves. She'd managed to apply the dark eye shadow Sabé had recommended without making herself look too much like an angsty teenager, and hadn't done half bad on the liner and lipstick either. She grimaced as she looked at the scar across her collar bone. The necklace may hide it a bit. But better come up with something in case someone asks. She slipped the silver headband into place across her forehead before sighing.
"Don't know about decent, but good enough. Come in here and help me get this necklace on."
The door hissed open, and she turned, leaning back against the counter as Rex stepped in, his eyes widening as he took her in.
"Wow," he said, and she raised an eyebrow.
"Alright then?"
"Better than alright." She noted his eyes lingered on her chest, where the leather corset was definitely pushing her breasts up slightly, and she glared at him. He stepped back for a moment, taking in her full silhouette, and she rolled her eyes before giving him a spin.
"You're beautiful," he breathed, and despite all of the things running through her mind, she felt herself blush. This is very different from our first gala on Lothal. Way back before everything started. But even then, he looked at me like that, and I should have known I was in trouble. She smiled to herself.
"The gloves should cover the cybernetic. I need your help with this necklace though. Struggling with the clasp because of my metal fingers," she said, holding the necklace out towards him.
He took the necklace from her hand, draping it across her collar bone as she carefully shifted her hair out of the way. She felt his breath on the back of her neck as he leaned down, the metal making a slight tinkling noise as he moved the clasp into place.
"There," he said quietly, and she felt his fingers graze down her bare shoulder blades before slipping around her waist. Rex rested his chin on her shoulder as she reached for the gloves, pulling the left one on carefully over her metal limb and stretching it up her arm to fully cover it.
"You seem distracted," he murmured against her skin before placing a kiss to the spot just behind her ear, sending goosebumps shooting down her arms. She turned her face towards him slightly, leaning in as his lips wandered down her neck and across her shoulder.
"Why ever would I be distracted when you're doing that?" she teased, but he gripped her waist tighter.
"You know that's not what I'm talking about."
She sighed, leaning back into him. "Just nerves," she said. Half true. Senna could tell Rex wasn't completely buying it, but he also wasn't going to fight her on it. Placing her gloved hand into his chest, she pressed him back from her as she took him in. The dark grey of the Imperial uniform contrasted sharply against his features, making his dark hair stand out even more in her mind. Same kind eyes though, she thought as he watched her. He had dark gloves tucked into his pocket and boots polished to within an inch of their life. She smiled.
"I hate to say it since it's an Imperial uniform, but you look nice, Commander."
He slipped his arm around her waist. "Never did much like being a commander."
She leaned into his touch. "Maybe we can change that tonight after this thing is over."
He dipped his head down to nip at her just below her jaw, and Senna felt heat rising in her cheeks.
"I look forward to it, my love," he said, his voice husky.
She giggled in spite of her concern, sweeping past him out of the refresher and giving herself one more onceover in the full-length mirror that sat in the corner of the room. Finally she sighed.
"I think that'll have to do."
Rex was pulling his gloves on across the room, and when she turned, a hunger was lurking behind his brown irises. "If you keep looking at me like that, we're going to be late and I'll have to redo my hair and make-up," she teased.
He shrugged. "Small price to pay, I'd argue." However, he maintained his composure. Senna felt herself flush as he came to join her, slipping his hand into hers and leaning over to press one more gentle kiss against her cheek.
"Ready?" Rex breathed against her ear.
"As I'll ever be," she whispered back, squeezing his hand lightly.
"Alright then. Let's go." Rex opened the door to their room as Senna smoothed the skirt she was wearing nervously. The two of them strode down the hall together, and Senna fought the nerves rising in her throat. You've done this before. Simple enough. Why are you so nervous? Rex slipped his arm around her waist as they stepped into the lift that would take them to the ground floor of the Canto Bight hotel, and Senna leaned into him. Glancing up, she noted his smile as he met her gaze, but the tightness in his jaw didn't go unnoticed. He's nervous too.
They presented their chain codes to the guards at the door to the main ballroom, and Senna could feel Rex tense slightly. Never does get easier to wait. But Tech had done his work well, and their credentials were quickly passed back to them as they were granted access to the main ballroom. Senna took a deep breath as she clutched Rex's arm, her eyes roving the attendees.
The crowd was a sea of grey, white, and black Imperial dress uniforms, the sparkle of medals glinting in the lighting. Interspersed between the uniforms were suits and gowns, most of which were of Imperial reds, blacks, and silvers. The dress at least fits the theme, I suppose, she thought. They descended the small staircase onto the main floor and were immediately inundated by the crowd.
Where do we start?
Rex glanced down at her before scanning the room. Admiral to my right. Seems he's working on at least his second glass of something. He's high-ranking enough to have some interesting topics, I'm sure.
Senna squeezed his arm. "Lead the way, my love."
Rex smiled down at her before leaning down and pressing a kiss to her lips before moving to her ear. "I love you, you know."
"I do," she replied. "And I love you."
His hand slid into hers, and he began subtly working his way through the crowd. Once they were in earshot of the admiral, Senna gently shifted herself in between Rex and the man.
I've got an idea, she thought.
I'm going to hope it's a good one, he replied.
We'll see.
With a slight yelp, Senna sent herself stumbling forward into the admiral's shoulder. To his credit, the man dropped his drink to catch her, his arms bracing against her shoulders as she tumbled forward.
"I'm so terribly sorry!" she exclaimed, straightening herself and gripping the man's arms as she checked him over. "I think someone stepped on my train, and I completely lost my balance. I'm so clumsy." She eyed the shattered drink glass that a waiter droid was already trying to clear. "Oh, you must allow me to get you another drink. What were you having?"
The admiral smiled down at her, bowing his head slightly. "It's not an issue, my dear. Glad I could keep you from injuring yourself."
"Oh, no, please. I insist." She sniffed. "Was it by chance Corellian whiskey?"
The admiral's eyebrows raised slightly, a grin gracing his face. "You have an excellent nose, my dear. It was."
She smiled as enchantingly as she could. "Then please, allow me to get a replacement."
Rex pressed his hand into the small of her back. "I'll get it dear." He reached around her, extending his hand to the admiral. "I'm very grateful you could keep my wife from winding up on the floor, Admiral..."
"Admiral Luitt," he said, gripping Rex's hand in greeting.
"A pleasure, Admiral. Commander Derk Treven, and this is my wife, Ana."
Senna bowed her head in greeting as the admiral gently grasped her hand, pressing a gentle kiss to her gloved knuckles. She could feel his mustache prickling through the fabric and giggled slightly. "I've never met a clone with a surname before," he commented.
Senna grinned as she leaned back against Rex slightly. "He took mine when we got married a few months ago."
"How lovely," one of the women hovering nearby commented. "How did you two meet?"
Senna turned to Rex. "Would you mind getting the Admiral his whiskey while I regale these people with our origin story?" she teased.
Rex leaned down, pressing a kiss to her lips. "It would be my pleasure. Be right back." And then, unspoken, A good plan, I suppose.
---
"So, tell me, Admiral, what are you most looking forward to with your new assignment?" Senna asked, leaning heavily into Rex's side. She felt his arm creep around her waist, and she couldn't help but smile. This is too easy. I don't know what we were so worried about.
The admiral had consumed several more whiskeys, which Rex had happily supplied as he amused the group with his exploits during the war and his ascendance within the Empire. He turned to Senna, cheeks flushed and eyes glowing. "There's much to look forward to serving on Lord Vader's flagship," he slurred. "Never been a finer ship than the Perilous. She's a beauty on top of a technological masterpiece."
Senna's attention was rapt, and she did her best to hide her eagerness as she asked her next questions. "From everything I've heard about the new line of Imperial-class Destroyers, I'm sure she's stunning. When do you rendezvous with her?"
"A few rotations from now around Coruscant. By all accounts, the Emperor would like us to make a grand show of force with her. And what a sight she'll be."
"And after that?" Senna asked, feeling Rex dig his fingers into her side a bit. She glanced up at him, the warning written in his eyes before she heard it in her mind.
Careful.
The admiral was too inebriated to note the look that passed between the two of them, and also apparently too far gone to stop talking. "Not much known, but I understand we'll be heading towards Ilum to inspect the mining operation there, then perhaps Ryloth."
Senna nodded with interest.
See, he's more than willing to talk.
Rex glanced at her out of the corner of his eye.
Not a very concrete timeline.
Senna smirked. I've got a plan for that.
Reaching down, she subtly plucked at a transparent bead that she'd had Sabé sew near the top of her skirt. "Allow me to get you another drink, Admiral," she offered, resting her hand on his shoulder.
"That'd be lovely, my dear. Thank you," Senna smiled, casting another glance at Rex, the bead clutched between her fingers. Quickly, she tracked down a waiter droid that was serving tumblers of whiskey, taking one from the tray and transferring it to her hand with the bead, which she quickly dropped in, swirling the glass. The bead was clear, blending in with the ice in the glass before it dissolved. Senna returned to the group, handing the glass to the Admiral, who raised it to her in thanks before taking a deep swig. Senna smiled disarmingly, stepping back into Rex's arms.
Did you just DRUG him?
She resisted the urge to giggle at his concern that came through his thoughts loud and clear as she squeezed his hand reassuringly. Bio-tracker. Should stay in his bloodstream for a week or so according to Tech. Quite harmless.
Rex chuckled lightly against her before bending down and pressing his lips to her ear. "You never fail to surprise me," he said softly into her ear, sending goosebumps cascading across her arms and heat rushing to her face.
"I do what I can," she returned, leaning back into him as his arms drifted around her.
They allowed the admiral to ramble on for another half an hour before Rex slipped away to use the refresher and grab them drinks. Senna immediately missed his presence, but did her best to remain attentive. We've got about all the information we need. Anything else is just a bonus at this point.
"Admiral, I hope you're not boring these people with your tales of gallantry from the war," came a poised, male voice from next to Senna. She turned to find herself staring face to face with an older human male in a grey Imperial dress uniform. Her eyes darted to his rank, and she didn't miss the way his eyes followed hers before appraising her from her toes to her headband. "I don't think we've had the pleasure of being introduced," he said, giving Senna a small smile as he took her right hand in his.
"Ana Treven, wife of Commander Derk Treven."
His smile widened. "I'm Moff Wilhuff Tarkin."
Him.
Senna's blood ran cold, and she fought everything within her to keep her face neutral as Tarkin clutched her hand. This is the man who treated Rex, Echo, and Fives as though they were lesser. As though they were expendable. He played a key role in driving Ahsoka from the Order, even going so far as to advocate for her execution. This is the man that manipulated Crosshair's mind and turned him against his brothers, that ordered their executions. The man that wanted my padawan to be tracked back down so that she could become a science experiment for the Empire. Hatred swirled within her, but she managed a smile as he pressed a kiss to her gloved hand. Get it together. Don't break.
"An honor to meet the wife of one of our officers," the moff drawled. "Tell me, where is your husband?"
"He's gone to get us some drinks, but I'm sure he'll be back shortly," Senna said evenly.
"I don't recognize his name. Did he serve during the Clone Wars?"
"I imagine it's hard to keep names straight when he shares the face of millions of others," Senna said lightly, digging her fingernails into her palm through the fabric of her glove.
That surprised Tarkin, and she took mild satisfaction in knocking him off balance, if only for a moment. "He's a clone?"
"He is. He was quite thrilled to hear you'd be here, Moff. He'll be sad he missed you."
"Oh, I don't know about sad, but I certainly would have been disappointed," Rex said from behind her. She whirled to find him holding out a flute of champagne to her, and she accepted it gratefully as he slipped his hand around her waist, pressing the palm of his hand to the small of her back and rubbing comforting circles with his thumb.
Tarkin's face had shifted, and Senna was having trouble determining if it was disappointment, disgust, or something between the two. She remembered Echo saying Tarkin had always distrusted the clones, and as she watched him take in Rex's features, she felt fear build in her chest. There's no way he recognizes him. No way. Not with his dark hair. Rex removed his hand from her back, shifting the whiskey he was holding to his left hand so that he could extend his right in greeting. "Commander Derk Treven. We never served together during the war, sir, but your heroics and leadership were well known amongst our ranks. It's an honor to finally meet you, even if only briefly."
Tarkin appeared to accept the deference. Pompous prick, Senna thought, feeling some of the tension leak from her shoulders as the moff stepped forward and clasped Rex's hand in greeting. "Always an honor to meet another soldier that served the Republic and now chooses to serve the Empire."
Are you alright?
Rex's voice in Senna's mind interrupted her anger, soothing her thoughts like a warm ray of sun breaking through a cloud. He's getting good at that. She slipped her arm through his, gently squeezing. His eyes flicked to her, and he smiled before re-engaging with Tarkin. "Will you be commanding one of these new ships, Moff?"
Tarkin smirked. "I will have the honor of serving as the commanding officer of the Executrix. From there, we'll be overseeing most of the major Imperial operations, including several large construction projects."
The superweapon. Senna stiffened slightly, and Rex's arm immediately slid back around her.
I know.
His fingers dug into her waist slightly as he pulled her towards him, his voice echoing in her mind once more.
We have to find out more, she thought, and she felt Rex squeeze her side in agreement.
Patience.
"I've heard there are several exciting projects in work at the moment. I only hope to get the opportunity to serve onboard a ship participating in one of them," Rex said evenly, taking a sip of his whiskey. Tarkin raised an eyebrow at that.
"You haven't received your assignment?"
Alarm bells were ringing in the back of Senna's mind. "Not yet," Rex said calmly. "I was only recently promoted to the rank of commander, and from what I understand, there's a need for them aboard the new destroyers. I'm honored to be assigned to one of them, and I'm just hopeful to get assigned to one that will be overseeing one of the larger projects. I find larger engineering projects fascinating."
Tarkin's eyebrow receded to its normal position, and Senna hesitantly reached out through the Force. There was an air of suspicion surrounding the moff, but nothing flaring. He has the reputation of distrust, so this may just be how he is. Her heart froze when Tarkin turned and looked right at her. "And what interests you, Mrs. Treven? Do you share your husband's interests in engineering?"
Something about the way he asked it felt like a trap to Senna, and she couldn't tell if it was just her paranoia seeping in or not. Stick to the background story. Changing it now will only add to his suspicion. "I would actually argue that he shares mine," she joked lightly. "I'm an inventor by trade. Derk has always had a mild interest in engineering, but I dare say my constant babbling about my projects has increased his interest in these types of projects. When we first got together, he barely knew what a power coupling did. Now, he offers valuable critiques on my inventions and asks intelligent questions that help alter my way of thinking."
"A different perspective can sometimes prove invaluable," the moff agreed, and Senna felt herself relax slightly, giving way to boldness.
"Agreed, Moff. I find that having someone that offers a different viewpoint can often provide insight into any biases we may have." Senna felt Rex dig his fingers into her side as a warning, but she ignored him as her anger crescendoed once more. He left Echo for dead. He twisted Crosshair's mind. He tried to kill them all, all because they refused to murder civilians that had served the Republic. Her blood was boiling, and if she couldn't cut him down with a lightsaber, she was going to get as many subtle jabs in as possible.
Senna, don't.
"Tell me, Moff Tarkin, have you ever had one of your own biases revealed to you from a different perspective? I assume so with your reputation as a skilled leader."
Tarkin smirked, but Senna could see the anger flare in his eyes for a moment. "I would say that I didn't get to where I am by trusting the judgment of others, Mrs. Treven. You see, one must rely on their own best judgements in the heat of the battle. Wars are not won by committee, but by action. Something I fear the Republic found out the hard way. While they sat holding hearing after hearing on diplomatic options that all proved fruitless, Emperor Palpatine took action, ending the Jedi threat that the Republic was unaware of, and the war."
Senna's teeth creaked as she ground them together behind a tight smile. "Of course, you're correct," she said sweetly. "I suppose the Empire is just fortunate it was the Emperor that took action first."
"Indeed, it is," Tarkin agreed, his eyes flicking down to Senna's clenched fist. In that moment, Senna allowed her anger and hatred to fester and flourish, giving in to her darkest impulse, and she reached out through the Force and into Tarkin's mind. Cool tendrils shot through her veins, wrapping around her heart as she reached out and listened to the moff's thoughts.
Foolish girl. Marrying a clone and then expecting me to show remorse for them fulfilling their intent. They served their purpose, and yet we still allow them to serve among us. She should be groveling at my feet with gratitude rather than spitting venom. If I had my way, her husband would be discharged and left to live his brief life on some backwater world.
SENNA.
Rex's voice in her mind shattered her connection, and she blinked rapidly, shivering suddenly. "Are you alright, my dear?" Tarkin asked snidely, and Senna shook her head.
"Yes, my apologies. I believe the champagne may be getting to me. Please excuse me." She slipped from Rex's grasp, striding towards the buffet aimlessly, going through the motions of picking up a delicate small plate and choosing hors d'oeuvres, her mind racing. No. I gave in. No.
"It's so kind of you," a female voice said to her left, and Senna whirled to stare at the older woman that was speaking to her. She was standing near Luitt earlier. Didn't say much. The woman wore a deep maroon gown that trailed behind her in a somewhat obnoxious train, gnarled gloved fingers covered in gaudy rings reaching for a cream puff on a platter near Senna. A large necklace with the Imperial crest hung from her throat, and Senna's mind revolted at the wealth the woman sported. Senna's anger continued to run unchecked as she surveyed the woman, her nostrils flaring as her mind raged. On whose backs were your credits made? What world was subjugated so that you can sit here in your finery? Her anger began to consume her once more, and she hardly felt the urge to fight it.
"I'm sorry?" Senna asked, and the woman smiled.
"Your husband. It's so kind of you to marry a clone, especially since it's well known that they'll only live half your lifespan. Of course, I suppose that will enable you to find another suitor when you're in your prime," the woman joked. Senna's emotions swirled. She wanted to vomit.
"I treasure my husband," she said softly, anger lingering just below the surface of her cool facade. "I love him more than anything. Marrying him was not some act of charity."
"Of course not, dear. I did not mean to offend. In fact, I would say it's going to work out well for the both of you. He gets a taste of what it feels like to be loved, more than most of them can say, and you get the opportunity to find love twice."
Senna couldn't breathe. "Please excuse me," she said, her voice dripping with disdain as she left the plate on the table, making her way through the crowd to the lift up to their room. She felt Rex trying to reach out to her, his eyes on her, but she didn't care. She had to be away from these people, from him.
We got the information we came for.
She slammed the button to their level in the lift, chewing her lip frantically as the lump rose in her throat.
He gets a taste of what it feels like to be loved. You get the opportunity to find love twice.
She swallowed the bile in her throat, and a sob ripped from her lungs before she could stop it. Gasping, she stumbled out of the lift and down the hall to their room, keying the code with trembling fingers. The door was barely shut behind her before she crumpled to the floor, her grief overwhelming her.
It's not fair. It's not fair. It's not fair.
Her fingers clawed at the carpet as she wept, trying to find anything to ground her as she curled in on herself, searching for some sort of anchor.
Half a life together, and then he'll be gone.
Her insides twisted with anger and helplessness as sobs wracked her body.
Foolish girl. Marrying a clone and then expecting me to show remorse for them fulfilling their intent.
She turned her face into the carpet, trying to muffle the scream of grief.
Half a life. And then I'll never feel his touch again. Never look into those eyes. He'll grow old and I'll be helpless to stop it. He'll die before I reach fifty. That's less than two decades with him. It's not fair.
She couldn't stop the selfish thoughts that poured through her.
Haven't we suffered enough? Don't we deserve happiness? To live together in peace? He watched his brothers turn against him and die. I lost everyone I've ever known, my entire life gone in blaster fire. When is it enough? It was so easy to not think of him aging when I was away, and I've ignored it for so long, but here it is, staring me in the face. I've been so naive.
And then, a sudden sobering thought.
I gave in.
She'd always promised herself that she'd never invade people's minds like that. She'd sworn to Rex that she never would. In fact, up until the moment that she'd reached into Tarkin's mind, she hadn't been certain she could. She shuddered, remembering the cool tendrils she'd felt enveloping her as she'd made the connection, peering into his thoughts.
It was tempting. Easy. Dark.
She sat up quickly, brushing her hair from her face, her breath coming in short gasps.
I failed. I gave in.
The bile rose in her throat once more, and she managed to scramble into the refresher before she vomited violently into the commode. She vaguely heard the door to the room open, and suddenly strong hands were pulling her hair out of her face, a warm palm on her back as she heaved again, emptying more stomach contents.
"You're alright," Rex soothed. "I've got you."
"Water," she rasped, and he quickly fumbled for a cup at the sink, filling it and handing it to her. She reached over for one of the gaudy hand towels, wiping her face before she rinsed her mouth a few times, spitting it into the commode before reaching for the small bottle of mouth rinse tucked at the side of the sink. Finally, she released another deep sob. Rex reached around her, taking the towel and mouth rinse from her before pulling her in between his legs and cradling her against his shoulder.
"What happened?" he whispered, and she shuddered.
"I...I lost control."
She felt Rex stiffen, his grip tightening on her. "Do we need to leave?" he asked, his voice quiet but stern.
"No. No he suspects nothing. Tarkin just thinks I'm a fool, and maybe he's right." She laughed, but there was no mirth. Looking up, she found Rex staring at her, his brows furrowed.
"How do you know what he thinks?" he asked quietly.
"I...I looked into his mind." She ground the heels of her palms into her eyes, smearing her makeup further. "I lost myself. I just...I was so angry. So angry for you. For Echo and Fives. For Omega. For all of you." She sobbed, hugging her knees to her chest. "I'm so sorry."
Rex hesitated, and her heart shattered. I'm a monster to him. She imagined he was looking at her the same way he had in the alley on Pantora, and she braced for him leaving. Instead, she felt Rex scoop her up under her knees and behind her back, standing and cradling her against his chest as he carried her out of the bathroom and gently set her on the edge of the bed. Lifting her skirt to reveal her feet, he began undoing the clasps on her shoes. Senna stared down at him, watching as his fingers gently worked the first shoe loose before removing it and gently rubbing at her arches before moving to the other one.
"Please say something," she whispered.
"Are you ready to tell me what's really been bothering you?" he asked quietly, not meeting her gaze.
"Rex."
He set her second shoe aside, coming to kneel in front of her, resting his arms on her knees before slipping his hands into hers and finally raising his eyes to meet hers. "There's something else. I've known it since we left Yavin 4, and I think that played a part in tipping you over the edge tonight." He pulled her gloves off gently before placing a kiss to both of her hands. "We face it together, right? That's what we promised. So let me shoulder this burden with you. Please."
The tears came again, and Rex cupped her cheeks, stroking Senna's tears away with his thumbs. Her fingers locked around his wrists as she pressed into his touch.
"You're already facing it. And you shouldn't have to."
His brow furrowed in confusion for a moment until his eyes widened. He moistened his lips.
"I look younger. That's what you said. So you've noticed how much I'm aging."
Senna sobbed again, nodding slightly, and Rex sat back. "I just...we've never talked about it," she whispered. "I knew it would happen. But we looked the same age, and it was so easy to ignore it. And now, I think you've passed me by biologically."
He nodded, his jaw clenched. "You don't deserve this."
Senna's eyes widened. "What do you mean?"
Rex's amber eyes were glistening as they met hers again. "You don't deserve that heart break. To watch me grow old twice as fast as you and then watch me die while you're still in your prime." He rubbed his hand over his dark hair, sighing. "I've been selfish."
Senna sank to the floor, kneeling in front of him. "Absolutely not." She kissed him hard, and she felt him resist her. Huffing in frustration, she grabbed his hands, pulling them around her. "Just because my time with you will be shorter doesn't mean I don't want it. I love you, Rex. I just...I wasted so much time being away from you. And...and it's just not fair. As petulant as that sounds." She sighed, resting her forehead against his chest. "It's just not fair."
"Are you sure you want this?" he asked, and she pulled back, cupping his face in her hands.
"There's nothing else I want more, Rex." His eyes were searching hers, trying to ensure she was certain. She reached out to him through the Force, feeling his warmth, and it took everything she had not to sigh into him. Scooting closer, she pressed her forehead against his and closed her eyes, revealing the place she'd imagined every night they were apart.
I want this.
She showed him the farm she'd often pictured, the two of them waking in the soft morning glow and eating breakfast together. Them fixing farm equipment before smearing grease over one another's faces. Sitting on a front porch and looking out over fields while they shared a bottle of whiskey. Holding each other every night, never worrying about the shadow of the Empire.
This is all I want.
She opened her eyes and realized Rex's cheeks were wet with tears of his own.
"I want that too," he rasped. "Perhaps selfishly. But that's all I want." He cupped her face gently, kissing her so tenderly she could have cried again. His fingers tangled in her hair, which had long fallen from its haphazard updo to drape across her shoulders in wild waves.
"Do you think less of me for losing control?" she asked, her voice quivering.
"Of course not," he said. "Your losing control just looks very different from mine. I punch things and swear."
"And I use the Force in ways that would have potentially had me dispelled from the Order," she said, hanging her head. "I can't let that happen again."
"Then don't," he said firmly, slipping his fingers under her chin to raise her eyes back to his. "You're stronger than that. I know it. And when you're not, don't hide it from me. I mean it. Let me shoulder the burden with you, Senna. That's part of my job as..." his voice trailed off.
Senna felt her heart stutter in her chest. "As my husband?" she asked.
He huffed a laugh. "If you'll have me, shortened life and all." The captain raised himself up on one knee, reaching out and taking Senna's left hand in his, his thumb grazing over the Jaig eyes etched into her ring finger. "I'd hoped to do this properly with a little more fanfare, but best laid plans and all that."
Senna's mouth fell open slightly as the realization hit her, and Rex grinned. "So, would you do me the honor spending however long I have together? As my wife?"
Senna had known for a long time that Rex was the one she wanted to spend her life with. Hell, they'd discussed him taking the same name as her, but something about hearing him saying the words and the symbolism of the moment absolutely shattered her. He actually wants to do it. To tie himself to me forever. Fanfare be damned. She scooted forward on her knees, cupping his face in her hands. "Of course. Like you even had to ask." She kissed him hard, her hands coming to rest on his shoulders as he gently cradled her head, his fingers tangling in her hair once more.
"Figured it was the polite thing to do," he chuckled. "And was hoping it was what you still wanted." Rex pulled her against him, slipping his hands under her thighs as he kissed her with more fervor. He scooped her up with a strength that surprised Senna, and she let out a small squeal as he stood, carrying her towards the bed.
"I love you," she whispered.
"And I love you," he replied, his lips grazing over hers as he carefully removed the headband that still rested across her forehead before reaching for the clasp of her necklace.
"I promised Sabé we'd get this dress back to her in one piece," Senna teased quietly, and Rex smirked.
"Won't be a problem. We've got a proper bed and a room to ourselves. I intend to take my time with you tonight." He hovered over her, his lips grazing her neck. "I'll take all the time I can get with you. Until I draw my last breath. I'm yours, Senna."
Her breath caught in her throat as he pulled back, his amber irises burning into her more intensely than she'd ever seen. He took her left hand, drawing it to his mouth to place a kiss on her ring finger.
"And I'm yours, Rex. Always."