Luke watched his friend’s face morph from absolute joy to surprise to reluctance all in a matter of seconds. Her features landed in a set position as she rubbed the back of her neck before averting her eyes.
“Look,” Luke said, trying to stop her from overthinking everything, “It’s in London but I promise you, we can get through it together. Don’t we always?” His eyes desperately tried to lock into her own, searching for any ounce of hopefulness that he could latch onto. Beca bit her lower lip, running her hand through her hair.
Finally after a few, prolonged moments she responded, “What am I even thinking? It’s an internship, right, with one of the best labels in the world. We have to take it, there’s no other option, but why London? Why couldn’t it be New York that we know by heart or Los Angeles, the heart of the business?” She began pacing the tiles in her kitchen, her eyes tracing her path.
“I’m 18 already and you’ll be eighteen soon. Our parents can’t stop us anymore; we could really do this, Becs. You and me like we’ve always planned,” Jesse responded. He swore he could see her mind ticking past, like the gears were turning, trying to figure out how they could deal with this situation.
Beca shuffled her feet, “It’s just so much to process right now, Luke. On one hand it’s amazing and incredible but we can’t just up and leave. What about…” Her voice trailed off as she looked down towards the floor.
“Jesse,” Luke continued her sentence, “Becs, we’re not going to be gone forever. It’s London not some third world country. They have internet and skype and whatever else there is. You can’t just give up this opportunity for a boy, even if it is Jesse.”
Almost as if a switch had turned in her mind, Beca looked up and straightened her posture, “You know what? You’re right. This is the first step to our dream, Luke. No doubt about it, we have to seize the opportunity. Plus, it isn’t even like Jesse and I are dating.” Even though the point she was trying to make was optimistic, only if you knew her well would you notice how her tone was mixed with a sort of frustration and yearning. Beca’s shoulders relaxed as she sat down on a chair next to Luke as he started to relay all the information Mark had given him.
…..
They had only a handful of days left and Beca was going to make the most of them. She had told her mother about her plans with Luke and only after hours of begging and hours of yelling had she had gotten her mother to agree. It did help that Luke had secured them his uncle’s apartment for the summer. She also had to deal with the embarrassment that came with her mother calling Mark Whitman to talk about his plans for Luke and Beca as well as to make sure Mark had full intentions to keep them safe and in good hands while they were in London. Luke would never let her live it down.
Her father was not as easily persuaded. When Beca first came up to him with her plan, he straight out laughed out loud. Why would he let his little girl go to London, of all places, to live with a boy for an entire summer? Couldn’t he be locked up for bad parenting or something? It took him two days until he would finally listen to her and listen to her mother. Only after speaking to Beca’s mom did his expression start to relax as he understood the care that was put into this so called plan.
He was going to make her take a self defense course when she was there and he was going to make sure Luke’s family checked in on them weekly. Beca wasn’t allowed to drink or do drugs or have sex. Actually she wasn’t allowed to stand fifteen feet away from a guy. She had to call him every day and he was going to make sure she was actually going to work and not getting drunk at some pub or whatever the British calls bars. The most important thing was, at the end of the summer, she was coming back.
Beca had finally broke through to her parents and they were actually letting her go (after many hours of negotiations and a long list of rules to follow). Luke was a legal adult, so even though his parents were reluctant to send him halfway across the world, they had no choice but to let him. Soon enough, their bags were packed and their tickets were ordered. It was almost like everything had happened in such a whirlwind.
With only three more days left, all they had to do was tell their friends.
…..
Beca had tried, and failed every time, to tell everyone that she was leaving. They were already making plans for the summer. Jesse had a list of new summer blockbusters that he wanted everyone to see. Fat Amy had a list of restaurants to check out and Chloe couldn’t wait to break out her floral dresses from the back of her closet. Summer was officially here and everyone was so excited.
Every time Beca was about to release the news of her internship, someone else piped in about another plan they had for summer. Beca fell quiet, awaiting the next time when she would drop the bomb of her announcement.
She didn’t think she had the confidence to tell people she was leaving, at least some people. She had just come back a year ago and now she was leaving already? Who does that? Over the past few months she had formed such a close bond to everyone, especially Chloe and Jesse. She didn’t want to lose the support they provided her with or the love they doused her in. Before coming to Atlanta, she was convinced she didn’t need anybody except Luke, but it turned out she was wrong.
Having all these people to turn to, each with their own, unique personality, was more amazing than she could’ve envisioned. She didn’t spend Friday nights locked up in her bedroom, basking in the light bouncing off her skin from the computer screen as she tried to find the best beat. Now, she had a group of friends that made her do things, say things that she never thought she would say. She was open and she was herself, never having to hide any part of herself. These new friends had made her feel accepted for who she was, regarding her flaws as part of her unique qualities.
Beca didn’t know what life would be like without them, without doing crazy antics or laughing until their stomachs hurt.
The first person she was able to tell was Chloe, even though it was the day of her flight. It was too hard to get the words out all those days prior. She wanted to tell Chloe, but saying those words, telling Chloe that she was leaving, made everything feel more real. Beca was really going to a foreign country and a foreign life. How the hell did that happen? She didn’t want to say the words, to see how hurt Chloe would be. Beca didn’t want people to say goodbye and she definitely didn’t want to say goodbye herself. If the words didn’t come out of her mouth, they weren’t real.
Cornering Chloe after the last bell rang on the last day of school, she ushered the girl into an empty classroom.
“Beca, are you okay,” Chloe asked, her eyes full of concern. Beca fidgeted with her pencil before letting the words fall out of her mouth, “I’m going to London for the summer, Chloe. I’m so sorry; I should’ve told you sooner but you know how much I hate goodbyes.”
Chloe was speechless for a time, soaking in the fact that Beca wasn’t going to be part of all the things they had already planned for that summer. She wasn’t going to be at the barbeque at Jesse’s house or go to the ocean beach on the fourth of July weekend. Beca was going to leave, just when everyone thought she was here to stay.
All she could muster up was four little words, “When are you leaving?” Beca sheepishly looked at the ground before, almost in a whisper, uttering the single word that made Chloe pull her immediately into a hug, “Now.”