"So she took it." James said, standing in front of a desperate Sirius struggling on the floor to put on his boot. He stared at him with half a smile, holding his hands in the front on his chest as he motioned widely in the air "What about it? Does that help us find her, because mum hasn't realized she is not here and she will kill us when she does so I need you to stop fighting your shoe and start talking." he rushed to say, snatching the shoelaces from Sirius' hands as he lowered himself to the floor and did the knot for him. That's when his eyes took a peek at his friend's hands, carefully placed over his knees "You're shaking." he noticed, his eyes going up to gray eyes as his hands worked with a mind of its own.
Sirius glanced quickly at James, not meeting his gaze for a second as he put them at use to get his jacket on "Just cold." he muttered, sliding one arm in and then the other.
"Right." James chuckled with a more bright smile "She'll be fine." he assured Sirius, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder "Now, about that letter." he asked again.
Sirius nodded "Regulus sent her the letter, asking to meet her about needing help or something." he blurted out, coming to halt when James turned to him.
"He needs help?" he asked with a frown.
Sirius narrowed his eyes at him "Didn't you hear everything yesterday, you gossip?" he asked with the tilt of his head, moving past him and inside the kitchen where they were headed.
James just motioned widely in the air, the desperation bursting in his movement as he marched behind Sirius "Not everything!" he marked, following Sirius around "I just took a guess, why would I be listening to what you talked with Y/N?"
Sirius just shrugged, jumping on top of the counter "I don't know, what do we do the things that we do!?" he asked back with wide eyes "No one knows and clearly she has spent too much time with us and we need to find her, preferably before she gets to Regulus!"
James bit the inside of his cheek but nodded still "She couldn't have gone far." he established, resting his arms on the counter "We're in the middle of nowhere with only wizard families that live nearby, she's probably still wandering around."
Sirius nodded fervently, looking at James as the gears inside his head turned. Moments passed where nothing was said and when Sirius looked back at James he had grown tense, his gaze shaky "We're underestimating her, aren't we?" he asked, taking off his glasses as he rubbed his eyes with his thumb and pointer finger, a long sigh leaving his lips.
"We are." Sirius muttered, letting his head hang low. A humorless laugh escaped him, turning to his friend "How long has she been gone?" he asked.
"You ask me?" James asked in disbelief, finger pointing at his chest "You're the one who practically caged her in your sleep. Honestly, it's a surprise that she managed to escape you in the first place."
Sirius just glared at James "I'm a heavy sleeper." he muttered, James' look of disbelief never changing as he just lowered his head a little "I have to be! You talk in your sleep, Peter gets midnight snacks and let us not talk about me and Remus. We have to take advantage of every minute of sleep we can get."
A chill ran down James' spine, conceding Sirius had a point. "Anyway, we can just go to the place he asked to meet her. You read the letter." he pointed out.
"They have a code." Sirius muttered miserably "Apparently they need it. Who even needs a code?" he mocked, scrunching his nose as he buried his head in his hands.
James straightened his posture, turning with careful movements to face his friend "Sirius." James called with all seriousness written over his face "We have code names." he said.
Sirius rolled his eyes, blowing air out of his mouth with a dismissive hand "Not the same." he declared "Besides, they're not even code anymore. We yell those names across the halls like they're our actual names. Even Y/N knows them by now."
James just bit his lower lip, looking down "We should really be more careful with those." he whispered.
"We should get Moony." Sirius said, jumping off the counter.
"What did I just say about the names?" James muttered, moving so Sirius could walk past him "And what's moony even going to do?" he asked.
"I don't know." he whispered desperately "Help look for her. We should get Peter too. And Lily, she knows around here."
"Sirius, she walked out of here, she wasn't kidnapped."
Sirius laughed, turning to James as he pointed a finger at him "You underestimate Regulus." he said with half a smile, the fear in his eyes settling.
James' mouth hanged open, tripping over his own words "What are you even thinking he's going to do to her?" he asked, leaving all humor aside "Regulus asked Y/N to meet him, he used a code so only her would know it was him. I don't know about you but that doesn't sound so dangerous." He watched for all of Sirius' reactions, seeing as the corner of his mouth twitched up in what appeared like a bitter smile forming. James bit the inside of his cheek, glacing once again at his friend "Maybe we should just wait for her to get back."
Sirius scoffed, grabbing an apple from the counter as he threw it from hand to hand "If she gets back." he said in a low voice.
James just turned his head with a groan "What are you so scared about?!" he asked desperately, looking at Sirius for answers "Really? What could Regulus do that would make her not come back?"
"I don't know!" he snapped "I don't know, okay. I have a bad feeling about this."
"About your brother reaching out to her best friend for help?" he asked with a laugh "I don't know, seems kinda familiar."
Sirius groaned, moving from James' side "Now you sound like Y/N." he said with a shiver.
"Thank you." James said, "But you're avoiding my point. What scares you so much? Because if you ask me I think you're thinking too much about this, she is not going back to her best friend and leaving you or something like that. She is coming back."
"I didn't ask you." Sirius mumbled with a glare, turning to James with the tilt of his head. "And it's not that." he defended himself, " Regulus would rather die than ask for help. I know because I have seen it, so what is this?" he motioned his hands in the air.
With the shrug of his shoulders James catched the apple that Sirius had thrown in the air, placing back on the counter "A change of heart? I don't know." he tried to explain, his own mind working to come up with a solution "He ran out of options." he said, placing his hand flat on the counter.
Sirius shook his head "You don't know him. He would never do it."
"I do know him." James whispered with a frown, looking down to his hands.
"What?" Sirius asked.
James' eyes snapped up, rolling his shoulders back with a small smile "Not like I have been there for every letter or conversation you had with him. Besides you would get on long rants about your family, I basically know him."
"So you see what I am saying?" Sirius asked more hopefully.
"Uh- not really." James said with an apologetic tone.
"Regulus spent too much time and effort trying to stay away from Y/N to now write to her." he explained in an attempt to make James understand.
With a tired look in his eyes and pursed lips he just heaved out a sigh "I'll go get Peter and Remus." he gave in, shaking his head as he turned to exit the kitchen, muttering under his breath.
"Yes!" Sirius whisper-shouted, punching the air discreetly on his side "Thanks Prongs!" he sang, following his friend.
*******
"You're an idiot, Y/N." you whispered to yourself, snaking your arms around your middle as you rubbed your sides in hopes of some warmth.
Actually, you weren't an idiot. Your plan had been created on breaks to the bathroom the day before and the hour or so that had taken you to fall asleep without the fact that Sirius was holding you distracted you from the task at hand. You would wait until both Sirius and James were sleeping and on their third dream, which was easy to pinpoint, with Sirius' even breathing on your neck and the soft whispers of James calling out a moose from standing in his way. It broke your heart to sneak out of Sirius' hold around your waist, carefully placing a pillow where you were supposed to be; he sighed happily, hugging the pillow tighter as you stood over him. He looked so peaceful and content you wanted to stay there and watched him sleep. After realizing what a creepy thought that was, you shook out of your sleep and walked inside, Sirius had left his jacket in the living room with the letter safely tucked inside in one of its pockets. It wasn't difficult to find. You pondered over the idea of taking his jacket with you, it was a cold middle of the night, you thought to yourself as you held it in between your hands. In the end you decided against it or the thought of leaving a note. What would you even write?
I left in the middle of the night. Went to see your brother. Sorry for lying. See you later :)
You left an hour or two before the sun was completely out, enough time to get you far from the Potter's house and making it hard for them to catch you in case they woke up and noticed you were gone but not that much time for you to be wandering for hours without a destination.
And now here you found yourself, the sunrise was just beginning, the east barely turning into a pale tone of orange. You had left the wizarding community where the Potter's lived behind you, walking for another while until you reached more populated areas of London where people were starting to wake and begin with their days. Few cars were on the streets, the odd person on a bike and just what you were looking for, a cab. You called for it, a relief laugh leaving your lips as your plan started to make more sense and you weren't just a lost girl in some place you didn't know of the city.
The cab slowed down next to you, the man behind the wheel wishing you a good morning as you got inside. With a smile you closed the door, the man driving took a look at you in the rearview mirror with lazy eyes until he seemed to wake up, taking a double look and then turning to you with his arm placed on the back of the passenger seat. "You okay, Miss?" he asked.
"Perfect." you breathed out "To Islington, please."
His hesitant eyes remained on you, taking a look back to the side of the street "Are you waiting for someone else? Your parents?" he asked, tilting his head "Are you lost?"
You sighed, narrowing your eyes at him "Not lost, and it's just me." you explained simply, the smile on your face falling as you held his gaze "To Islington, please." you repeated.
He gave a short nod, muttering under his breath as he started to drive "You have an address, anywhere specific in Islington?" he asked, looking at you through the rearview mirror.
You hesitated, nibbling in your lip "The closer you can get me." you said, thinking better about it. "Actually, to Grimmauld Place." you corrected.
"Alright." he mumbled, driving faster than before.
The drive was silent afterwards. You finally felt like you could breathe, letting yourself sink in the seat as your head fell back. The few events of the day were making its way to you, you hadn't let yourself think about anything while walking, too worried remembering the path you were taking in case you had to turn back. Your mind had been too busy to actually think about what you were doing, but now that all you had to do was wait seated on the back of the cab, the dam of thoughts broke letting them all flow free.
Sirius was going to be furious, you knew that and were preparing yourself for the consequences. You had lied to his face. The sinking feeling in your heart didn't stop there. He had probably woken up by now, realizing you were not there, that you had sneaked out in the middle from his grasp. He had looked so happy when you both went to sleep, the smile permanent even in his unconscious state as he held you. Now you could only picture the look of betrayal on his face, the missing gleam on his eyes as he put all the pieces together and realized where you were. What if this was where he drew the line? You couldn't help but wonder all you had put him through, all the nights he watched you cry because of his brother and all the thoughts this placed inside his head. He was going to wake up and realize he had enough of your drama with Regulus and end everything with you.
A silent tear rolled down your cheek, one you cleaned quickly with the sleeve of your jumper as your head turned to face the window. You felt naive thinking you could fix things but you had to try, with both of them, you had to try.
"Grimmauld Place, Miss." the driver announced, coming to a stop just at the side of the street. You breathed in, nodding as you reached for your pockets.
"Thank you." you whispered, paying him quickly as you got out. You heard the engine as he drove away, leaving a deserted street empty of any color. Looking at both sides you realized it was very quiet, too silent, even for the early hour in the morning. There were no people walking the streets, no cars driving by or air blowing on your hair, just you.
Crossing the street, you walked for a couple of minutes until you realized the house you looked for was missing. Number 11 skipped to number 13 and you were certain, for the many letters you had received on the winter break from him his home was on 12 Grimmauld Place.
With a sigh, you lowered your head with a shake "You're smarter than this, Y/N." you muttered, reaching for the letter inside your pocket, the one Regulus had enchanted. Unfolding it, you looked twice at your surroundings before you placed it carefully on the floor. "Eye on the target." you said clearly, watching as the letter turned and folded itself into a small bird that started to fly right in front of you and straight to Regulus. It did come as a surprise when the paper bird flew past the street and away from where you stood, but you couldn't doubt that the letter and the charm came from Regulus.
It had taken an entire summer and many failed tries for Regulus to master the charm, but when he taught it to you it was as if he was born with the ability to do it. You used it to find each other around the castle, especially if you were hiding. Leaving a note in the other bag or getting someone to deliver it was an easy task, establishing the code to get it to work so only you could use it was exciting, following the form the paper took felt like an adventure, one you had missed.
When the paper bird took its last turn you came to view a small park filled with trees and a stone path the bird started to jump in, until it reached the back of a bench and it shattered itself into small pieces. You looked up, meeting the back of a too familiar head. "Regulus." you said.
At the mention of his name he turned his head, his eyes showing the surprise his movements never would. He stood slowly, turning his body to face you completely, his eyes followed the entire shape of your body until he met your gaze again "You're here." he said, his always calm voice not letting anything through.
You smiled shyly, trying not to show the exasperation at his lack of emotions. Was he happy or disappointed you were there? You would never be able to tell even if you asked him directly.
"You doubted I'd come?" you asked, taking hesitant step after step until you were next to him "Honestly, you sounded desperate." you said, clicking your tongue as you sat.
He ignored your comment, his tongue sticking out of his mouth a bit as he considered you. "Can you blame me?" he finally said with the tilt of his head "After the last couple of months I doubted you would even consider seeing a painting of me."
You smiled briefly, turning to the side "You've never been a good poser. The painting would be awful and that I would like to see."
"Fair enough." He tried to fight the smile forming on his lips, his cheeks rising with the wrinkles of his eyes when at last a breathy laugh escaped him. "Have you come here to gloat?"
"Among other things." you said after a beat, stretching your arms in front of you with the crack of your knuckles, "I do consider a bad joke from the universe that after everything we did, we both ended up coming back to one another."
"How poetic." he murmured.
"Still, I'm not here to catch up." you said "Why do you need my help?"
He lowered his eyes, a bitter look taking over his face. "I want out." he replied, making you look at him questioningly "I want out of my house, of my parents grasp." You stayed quiet, contemplating your friend before you with precaution. "You're the only one who has ever offered me help, I didn't know what else to do." he said when your silence was too long, your face too calculating.
"Just like that?" you asked after a moment of pondering.
"What about it?" he asked back.
"We fought over this, Regulus. The fall of our friendship, if you will, was because of your ideas about blood status. I tried to tell you my worries, my concerns and you tried to change my mind. Three weeks home and you're suddenly ready to walk away from everything you know." you voiced, searching for his eyes "What happened to you?"
He lifted his eyes, the gray color a lighter shade as his gaze seemed to finally show something, something in him making you shaky. "I got to see it first hand." he said plainly "I guess that gives you perspective and changes you inside."
You backed away slightly, eyes widening at his confession. You restrained yourself from asking what he meant, not certain if you wanted to know the meaning behind his words.
You looked at him, head to toe, taking him all in. "What do you need me to do?"
"I might need a place to stay for a while." he asked, looking at you through his lashes "But it will be dangerous, my parents won't be thrilled about it."
"We'll manage something." you assured him, placing your hand on top of his, giving it a soft squeeze. "When do you want to do it?"
"Today." he said quickly.
"To-today?" you asked him in surprise, "Are you sure?"
"I don't want to be there any longer, besides they're out for the day. We have time." he explained.
"If you're sure." you said with a shrug, getting to your feet "A heads up would've been nice but hey, the best plans are the ones we don't plan, right?" you said with a smile.
"Of course." he said, getting up as well. He then moved to offer his arm to you, you took a hesitant glance at him that in the end turned into you bursting into a smile while taking his arm as he started to lead you. "One thing." he said, taking one look down at you to then keep his eyes up front "You wouldn't happen to tell Sirius about you coming here, would you?"
"Would it make you feel better if I said I didn't?" you asked with a chuckle.
He lowered his gaze, "Yes." he murmured "Yes, it would."
*******
Euphemia Potter's voice echoed the walls of her home as she called the names of her sons. Walking down the stairs to walk to the kitchen where they had been the entire morning, suspiciously silent.
"Honey." she called, standing in the door of the kitchen as she looked around "Where is Y/N?" she asked "I haven't seen her all morning."
Sirius took a sip from his cup, turning to James as he drank and looking at him over the brim.
"She's taking a shower." he said with enough confidence to lie to Minerva McGonagall herself "Sirius threw her into the mud." he said after, making Sirius choke on his coffee as he lowered his cup.
"By accident." he fixed, glaring at James as he turned to her "I was chasing her and when I picked her up she tickled me and we both fell and she ended up...covered in mud."
Euphemia just chuckled, covering her mouth "Charming." she said, walking inside the kitchen "I didn't hear her, though. Are you both sure she's fine?"
"Positive." they said in unison.
She made a sound, turning with a glass in her hand "I swear it's weird when you both are in sync." she muttered "Even more when it's the four of you. Where are the other two, by the way?"
"On their way." James offered.
"The five of us will be here soon." Sirius said after, getting kicked underneath the table by James.
Euphemia glanced between James and Sirius, pointing one finger at each of them "I don't want to know what you did." she said with narrowed eyes "Just tell me what you broke after you do it." she muttered, leaving the room with a sigh.
They both let a long breath out after she left, dropping their heads on the counter in sync. "Get the shower running, that will make it more real for now." James mumbled with his face against the counter.
"On it." Sirius said, getting on his feet and walking to your room.
All your stuff was there. A couple of hours had passed since he woke up to not find you there, a cocktail of emotions inside him as he still didn't know how he felt. He just knew he wanted you back, unharmed and without a tear shed. He walked inside the bathroom and started the shower, closing the door and grabbing one of your jumpers from your bed.
Two more voices reached his ears as he walked down the rest of the stairs, rolling your jumper into a small ball as he dropped it into the counter, burying his face in it.
"Hello to you too." Remus said, looking down at Sirius.
"What took you so long?!" Sirius screamed into your jumper, the words barely audible for the rest.
"I went to get Remus so we could walk here." Peter explained "You haven't done anything since you wrote?" he asked, looking at James.
James just shrugged "I say we should wait, Sirius wants to go look for her. So, we brought the brain of the team." he said, pointing to Remus.
"Hey." Peter complained.
"Sorry, Pete. We all know it's true." James said, throwing a piece of bread at the smug look on Remus.
Peter just put up a hand, turning to James "Are you upset?" he asked, "You're calling us by our names."
Sirius' head rose, offering a hand in Peter's direction "See?" he mumbled "Being called by our names feels weird now."
"Yeah, yeah." James muttered.
"Are you done?" Remus asked, getting everyone's attention with a nod "What is going on?" he asked.
"Y/N went to meet with Regulus this morning when she promised she wouldn't." Sirius explained miserably.
Remus frowned "I thought they weren't friends anymore."
Sirius rolled his eyes with a sigh "Everyone thought that but he asked for help and he's back on the game." he said with a bitter smile.
"So you're jealous." Remus said bluntly before James or Peter could stop him, making both boys turn their gazes away. "Rub more salt in it, moony. I think there wasn't enough." James mumbled through gritted teeth.
"Someone had to say it." Remus whispered.
"Why's everyone thinking that?" Sirius asked "I am not jealous. You know why? Because I trust her." he said, marking each word.
"Oh, we trust her too but you're a little jealous, Sirius." Peter explained, holding his hands in the air as he met Sirius' glare "Just saying."
"You don't know the whole story." he said, playing with hands as he poked the counter a little too harshly. "All the things he said and did to her."
They all fell silent.
"She did tell me." Remus said.
"I know enough." Peter muttered.
"You told me." James offered.
Sirius groaned "Okay, you all know. But I know even more, he's playing something else."
"I think you're digging it deeper than it needs to be." James said, making Sirius snap.
"If it was Snape and Lily, would you let her talk to him? Knowing everything he has done?" he asked, jumping to his feet.
James bit the inside of his cheek "I wouldn't be a fan." he said "But she would do what she thinks is right, not what I let her. Maybe if you hadn't been so protective of her she would have let you know and we wouldn't have to be guessing."
"Guys." Remus called.
"We don't need your input now, Remus." Sirius hissed, holding James' gaze.
"Fuck you, alright." Remus whispered, walking further inside the kitchen while resting his back on the wall, arms crossed as he stared at the window.
"Guys," Peter called this time, opening the kitchen window "In coming."
That captured both dark haired boys' attention, making them break their glares on each other as they walked to the window with a frown.
"Isn't that-"
"I'm not gonna say I told you so," Sirius said, watching as his mother's owl landed on the windowsill, getting the letter from its peak "But I told you so." he muttered bitterly, breaking the wax seal as both James and Peter read from behind each of Sirius' shoulder.
"Say whatever you want," James whispered "We have bigger problems."
*******
The building broke apart slowly, the windows and the door with the number twelve on it emerging slowly from within as you stood with only Regulus' arms to hold onto.
"I love magic." you whispered for yourself as he walked you to the door. "Are you sure it's safe? They're not here?"
"Completely certain." he assured you, opening the door for you to walk in first.
You admire the construction, the home where both Sirius and Regulus grew and suffered. You wanted to burn it to the ground but couldn't help but notice how beautiful it was.
"Well, let's get to it." you said nervously, "Where are your things?" you asked.
"Don't you want something to drink first?" he asked "Tea, maybe?"
You stared at him "Not a catch up, Regulus. We don't have the time."
"It's barely noon." he protested "And your stomach has been rumbling like a bear since you got here, my parents won't be here until it gets dark."
You considered him, feeling the empty growl of your insides "Maybe just a bite." you muttered, following him until the end of the hall where a long table settled across the room. He moved to round the table, grabbing a bowl from the counter as he handed it to you.
"Here." he said, moving to the stove where a kettle was settled. He got a cup out, pouring in some tea for you.
"What about you?" you asked while taking a sip of the cup.
"Not hungry." he mumbled, watching you as you drank as he rested his chin over his palm, closing his eyes softly. He muttered something under his breath.
"What was that?" you asked, breaking a piece from the bread he had given you.
"I'm sorry." he said more clearly, his eyes now looking directly into your own. Dark gray meeting you.
"Regulus." you said, suddenly aware of your position "What do you mean you're sorry?"
He pursed his lips, looping his finger over the handle of your empty cup as it hung from his hold "Didn't you learn anything from the myth of Persephone?" he said, looking back at you. "Don't eat anything unless you plan to stay."