That next Sunday came quickly. The article was released as promise but neither Everett and I read it. We both knew what it would say. Instead, we fled the city and headed to Newark where we had spent the whole day with Dale. I asked Everett if he wanted to do anything else and he had nothing else he wanted. He said that this was the place he could disconnect and since his father didn't read the newspaper, he knew it would be safe.
I hadn't talked to dad very little since the practice a few days ago. I had not returned to practice either. I was a woman of my word, and I did quit. I was done. Working in that environment was too much. It was not worth my mental health to deal with that. And if dad was going to be kissing the behinds of the university leadership, I was not interested in being a part of it.
It was honestly freeing to not go to practice every day. I could actually focus on school and have free time. Whenever Everett wasn't practicing, we would spend time together, but emotions were high since the only thing we could think about was the article.
"And look at that! It's snowing, in November? It's going to be a cold one this year," Dale said as he looked out the window of his small farmhouse.
"Why look at that. It is snowing," I said as I looked out the window beside him.
For a moment we looked out the window and watched the snow come down like feathers. It wasn't until Dale's phone alarm broke us from the scene.
"Ah, well, that's it. Pizza is done. I'll get it," Dale said as he got up from his chair and walked into the kitchen.
I turned my attention to Everett who stared out the window. He had been so silent today. I thought he would at least say something relating to the article. But as his silence wore on, I couldn't help but think that he was regretting the article.
"Are you okay?" I asked.
He nodded. "I'm fine. I thought leaving my phone at home was a safe move, but it is only driving me crazy now."
"I think my phone is in the car. Want to see it?"
Everett shook his head as he rested his back against the chair, he said in. "Nah. I'll just find out everything when I return tonight."
"If you change your mind, let me know. I'll get that phone."
He chuckled as his father walked back into the room wearing a frown.
He looked at me then at Everett in silence. With his phone in his hand, he cleared his throat. "You are involved in a smear article against your own team?"
Everett's eyes glanced at me before turning his attention to his dad. "Yeah. I did."
"Why?"
There was such pain in his voice. It made me want to speak up, but something told me I should remain silent. This was Everett's chance to defend himself. It was his time to finally be honest with his father.
Everett shook his head as his body turned ridged as he prepared for a fight. "Football has done nothing good for me recently. There are terrible people on the team that needed to be exposed."
"But what does this mean for you?"
"I don't care," Everett said with a shrug as he tried to keep his voice level.
"You don't care? What do you mean? What about your dreams? You looked so hard and now the pro teams will think twice. You shouldn't have rocked the boat. That is not what good players do," Dale asked as his voice rose.
"No, that is what spinless players do. And going pro was never my dream. It was yours."
"You can't be serious," Dale yelled. Suddenly the relaxing day was turned into something stressful.
"I am. You know what, I'm done. Dad, I hate football and you never saw that. I've hated it for years. I was incredibly unhappy playing football. I was abused in football. If I never played, I wouldn't have experienced all the pain I had. But I tried to tell you about these things before. You never listened," Everett said as he stood up from the chair.
Dale opened his mouth then closed it. "You can't throw this all away just because of one experience."
"It's more than one experience but you wouldn't know since you never listen to me." And with that Everett walked out the door.
In the silence of the room, I looked at Dale with a frown. He frowned back at me as he shook his head.
"Did you know?" he asked with pain in his voice.
I nodded.
"Why did you not tell me?"
"It wasn't my story to tell."
He grimaced as silence filled the room. He stalked around the room then finally sat down on the couch. "You know, there were so many times Everett tried to talk about football and his feelings towards the sport. I didn't want to hear them. I turned him away. Over time, he stopped bringing them up..." He shook his head as he thought about it. "But I never understood what he really dealt with. Reading it from the article, it hurt."
"If it hurt so much, why did you act the way you did just now?"
"I don't know. It just caught me off guard. For years I knew he would be something in football. But this article tossed that away like a snap of the fingers. That article hurt in so many ways."
"Don't you think it hurt him too?" I asked as I looked out the window to see his car gone. "Where did he go?"
"He probably went to the family barn down the road from here. It's about a mile from here. I can drive you there if you want," he said as he pointed towards the path of the barn.
As he mentioned it, I remembered passing it before. Everett made a comment about how it was his place to escape. I knew where it was. I shook my head as I slipped my coat on. Having Dale there was the last thing I needed. "Nah, I can do this myself."
"Okay then. Please call me if you need anything. And once you find him, please let me know. Maybe I said too much. Maybe I was too hard on him."
I slipped on my boots and nodded. "I will." Then with that, I left out the front door into the snow.
I kept my head high as I walked out of the driveway. So here I was, walking down on a country street in the middle of Ohio blizzard, wishing I did everything right. I shouldn't have pushed him to write the article. I shouldn't have insisted on publishing it. Now that it was going live, it would leave a path of destruction. It would destroy Everett but at this point he didn't even care. He said he wanted this, but I couldn't help but think I was the one that forced him to want it.
As much as I thought this was for the better, in the back of my mind, I couldn't help but thing I screwed everything up. I screwed up my relationship with my father. I caused drama in Everett's life. I was the one that was rocking the boat and I didn't see it until now.
I thought I was helping him. I saw who Charles was and I thought I was guiding him to the right thing. I thought this would be freeing. But he was just as torn up about it as before.
I blinked tears from my face as I pushed forward, hoping I would make it to the barn soon. But with the snow, I could barely see a few feet in front of me. I listened, hoping I would hear his car or his music, but nothing was sounding in the dead of the snowy night.
"Everett?!" I called out, hoping he would hear my cries. As the wind hit my face, I wrapped my coat around my body. My voice was practically silent against the snow falling around me. Snow flew into my eyes, but I blinked it out, hoping that I would find him soon. "Everett!"
Silence.
Snow.
I pushed forward, hoping I would see anything that resembled a barn soon. Minutes passed and finally the barn came into view. As it took shape, I sprinted to it, wanting to find Everett and get out of the snow.
I walked into the barn and saw him sitting on a hay barrel.
He looked up at me and frowned with my phone in his hand. Notifications lit up the screen. "Things are blowing up," he said as my phone dropped to the ground, hardly making a sound. "I prepared for this, but I didn't think people would say as hurtful things as they are now."
I wish there was something I could have said, but nothing would take away this pain. He would have to face the music at some point. I just wished I didn't push this article so hard. He wasn't ready to share and I should have waited.
"They are calling me a slut, or they are saying that I lied, that this was just a call for attention," he said as he shook his head.
I picked up my phone and shoved it into my pocket without looking at it, however I felt it buzz with another notification.
"Dad was right, I should have not rocked the boat."
I was starting to think he was right. This wasn't worth the fall out. "I'm sorry."
He looked into my eyes and cocked his head to the side. "For what?"
"I should have not pushed this article."
"You hardly pushed. It was my choice. I thought I was doing something right. Now, your father texted, saying the president of the university wants to speak to me. There is going to be a council and I have to be back at school by tomorrow. They are going to kick me out of the school, I am sure of it."
"I should be there with you."
"But you didn't sign a nondisclosure agreement," Everett pouted. He took a deep breath in and let it out slowly. He stood up from the hay barrel and pulled out his keys. "You can't come to this one."
I frowned, wishing I could.
"I think I'm ready to go back to Columbus. There is no more hiding from this."
I nodded as I followed him out of the barn.
As I got into the car, I quickly texted Dale then turned my phone off from the notifications I was getting. They would not stop. Every minute there was something new. The screen lit up the car and was distracting. We couldn't have that.
In the drive back, no words were spoken, but we both knew that everything as we knew it had changed. The university would never be the same after this. We would never be the same.