Taha's POV.
Once she left I went back to the hotel and checked out. I met up with my friends then went home.
Adnan was outside and I knew the look he gave me. He wanted to talk.
"Mama said invite Adnan for coffee." Tahera said sticking her head out.
"My moms inviting you." I said and he nodded and I led him into my home.
We had dinner and I couldn't help but keep Adnan under my observation. What was so special about him that carried so much respect and power. I watched as he kept his gaze down. He made occasional eye contact only with me. But when my mom or Tahera spoke to him he would keep his eyes lowered. I envied his modesty.
Suddenly he broke the news saying Hawa was home. I was surprised.
"Oh she didn't tell me." I mumbled pretending like it didn't bother m when it really did. I wanted to talk about our kiss. Well not exactly talk about it but apologize or ask if she felt something. Because I definitely did.
"She told me her phone was dying. I called her exactly when she landed, nothing to worry about." Adnan said looking at me with a reassuring smile.
"Ya."
"She's knewly married she'll learn." He said putting his hand on my shoulder reassuring me. Could he tell I was offended?
"Don't worry Adnan, he doesn't take anything to heart. He's just a boy." My mom said and Adnan nodded.
I'm not a boy. I'm a grown adult. 20 for Gods sake. But I can't argue this I had nothing to prove. But once I finish becoming a technician surely my mom will stop this.
My mom never respected me or my work ethic. I hated her for it. But I could never say that to her, afterall she is my mother. But I wanted to feel what Adnan felt. I wanted to have that respect, I wanted my mom to tell me she was proud of me. That she respected me and what I've done for the family. But she didn't. Paying bills and buying grocery's since 16 had gotten me nothing but sleep deprivation.
"When are you graduating?" Tahera asked with her eyes focused on Adnan.
"In 4 years."
"Wow me too." She lied. That's embarrassing.
"You're graduating at 20?" I asked slowly tilting my head to her and she gave me a petty smile.
"Oh sorry I'm horrible at math I could use some tutoring." She said laughing it off. I knew what she was doing. I shook my head side to side embarrassed for her deeper attempt.
"Taha looks like your sister is asking for your help." Adnan said and I looked at her with a disgusted face.
"Oh ya. My help." I said sarcastically. I couldn't tell if Adnan could see through was she was doing or if he was genuinely oblivious that she was trying to set him up with herself.
"She's a child isn't it your duty to help?" He said making Tahera's face go pale. I'm so glad he called her a child.
"Never mind." Tahera snapped taking his rejection.
Suddenly the door bell rang and I opened the door to see Tasneem walk in with her husband.
She greeted us with Salam, she was surprised to see our neighbour Adnan at our dinner table. She better not get any ideas for Tahera.
After dinner Adnan led Isha salah and decided it was time to go. My mother insisted he stay longer but he said he'd come another time.
"I can't believe Hawa didn't call to let you know she landed safely. After all you are her husband." Tahera said looking toward Tasneem.
"Well that's what happens when you're in love with someone but marry someone else." Tasneem said leaning back into her couch.
"She's not in love with anyone else, what's wrong with you." I said trying to keep my calm.
"Girls never forget their first love. Especially one you're about to marry." Tahera said looking at me like she knew what she was talking about.
"Leave him alone." My mom said walking in staring them down.
"they don't know what they're talking about. There's no such thing as love before nikkah." My mom added looking at me.
Suddenly my phone rang it was Hawa.
"Look she's probably calling you." My mom said.
Hawa's POV.
As soon as Adnan hung up, my phone died. Once I got to my university dorm I quickly put my phone in charge and put my stuff away. I couldn't stop thinking about our kiss. What happened? I wonder if he's regretting it. I hope he brings it up I'm too shy to do it myself.
After my phone reached 50 percent I called Taha. I could feel butterflies in my stomach. Did I have a crush on Taha? No! Maybe it was the kiss! We're friends!
We said Salam and greeted eachother. Instantly my lips curled into a smile hearing his voice again.
"Adnan told me you landed." He said and I shut my eyes a little annoyed. Could he not have kept that to himself.
"Just after he called my phone died, I had to wait to get to the campus to charge my phone and call." I said biting my lip. Bring up last night idiot.
"That's okay. Adnan came for dinner. It was nice. Tasneem came by too. Ayan's with Adnan too. Adnan lead salah so beautifully mashAllah. I was surprised." He said and I nodded in agreement.
"I know. He studied so much for it and with the help of Allah his hard work paid off. Allah blessed him Alhamdulillah." I said.
"Ya lucky guy."
"How's your mother and sister? Have you spoken to them about the incident?" I asked trying to keep the conversation from dying off so quick.
"I'll leave it between the two." He said not really leaving much for me to add.
"Are you sure? If you talk to Tahera kindly she will listen. She's a nice girl." I said and I could hear him groaning hearing me say that.
"My mom told me to stay out of it. She's not a nice girl. I know her. " he said sounding a little aggressive. I guess it was a trigger to him.
"Look at her from my eyes Taha."
"You mean ignore all her horrible traits and look at the one good in her?" He asked sarcastically.
"Don't be silly. Shes being rebellious but if you stick by her not annoy her but talk to her with care and compassion-" before I could finish he cut me off.
"No thanks my mom told me to stay out of it."That took me off guard. Was he upset?
"Oh okay. Sorry I didn't mean to-"
"I know. Whatever I'm gonna go now I'm tired I should sleep." He said once again sounding very offstandish and annoyed.
"Taha are you... are you okay?" I asked hesitantly a little afraid of what was to come.
"All good. Just tired. Take care man." He said hanging up. I looked at my phone a little worried. I didn't expect him to be this way.
I hadn't eaten and I no longer felt the need to. Why was he so distant? He must regret the kiss. Why did I think we'd be a couple. We were always friends.
I put the rest of my stuff away and checked my phone. I went on Snapchat and saw that Taha had posted a story. He was out with his friends. I felt a funny feeling at the pit of my stomach.
Immediately I made wudhu and turned to pray my salah and made dua for Taha's heart to be kind again and for him to be safe. I also prayed for Tahera. She was a troubled teen understandably.
I had decided it was best I focused on my education and if he felt he wanted to call he would. My parents and Adnan called both days and I held back the tears when I heard their voices. I called my sister too , she asked me how the wedding night went and I told her we stayed apart no details were important.
Finally two days later he called.
We said Salam and I waited for him to talk.
"You been busy?" He asked.
"Studying and working. How are you Taha?" I asked.
"I'm okay work and studying. Have you had dinner?" He asked.
"No I'm not very hungry." I said.
"I wanted to Uber you some food." He said.
"Oh. Maybe another day." I said politely.
"I miss coming into your window to bother you." He said with a chuckle following after.
"I'm sure you do."
"I wanted to tell you about that night." He said, I kept quiet.
"I lied. I was going out. But I didn't want to worry you. I was in a rush." He was not apologetic, he simply wanted to justify his lie. I was not going to have it.
"Taha. You could have just told me. Why would I worry?" I asked.
"I don't know."
"I worried after you lied. It took you two days to call and you didn't bother with an apology. I didn't think you were a liar nor a coward but maybe today you've proven otherwise." I said calmly. I was annoyed. I no longer wanted to hold a conversation with him.
"I called to apologize you're getting mad." He argued.
"Taha, when you want to apologize because you feel bad for lying to me then come. Today you're apologizing because you realized I'm upset, not because you genuinely feel that what you did was wrong." I said leaving him silent.
"Good night Taha. Please take care of yourself and give my Salam to your mother and sisters and if you get the chance to see my family give them my Salam too." I said waiting for him to respond. After seeing that he wasn't planning to respond I hung up.
There was a lot of anger in me, I didn't want to let it out on him and disrespect him instead I chose to end the conversation and pray then maybe go for a run.
Was Taha going to become into a horrible friend?
-
Taha's POV.
I was annoyed at Hawa for reacting the way she did. I called to say sorry instead she got mad at me.
"You're still in a fight? See if she loved you loved you, she wouldn't let you stay angry for this long." Tahera said sticking her head in my room.
"How do you know she's mad?" I asked raising an eyebrow.
"Heard you on the phone with her that day. Plus your face looks so angry." She said shrugging.
"Hey where's the bracelet I got you?" I asked seeing her wrists were bare.
"I lent it to my friend." She said.
"Uhuh?" To say that I wasn't weirded out that my sister had an obsession with taking peoples things and lending them out would be a lie.
"Ya I'm not like Hawa. I share my stuff. Remmeber the bracelet Adnan gave to her she never let me borrow it cuz her brother gave it so lovingly.But I'm nice I let my friends borrow stuff." She said rolling her eyes. Wait until she finds out I wish she had done the same with hers.
"She gave you her necklace shut up Tahera." I snapped.
"Don't take your anger out on me. It's her you're mad at!" She said slamming the door.
"Whatever." I scoffed.
I went out at around 8 with Kevin Oscar and Syed and posted us in the car on my snap story, then a picture from the bridge at midnight.
"Bro you're 20 why'd you get married. You gonna be faithful to one woman for life now. You never even experienced shit." Kevin said as I stopped the car to let Oscar get out.
"Good night guys say hi to the misses from me." He said getting out and shutting the door.
"I know. But in my culture we just get married. My mom was up my ass about it so I chose my girl and sealed the deal." I said shrugging it off as no big deal.
"Plus she's not even here." Syed added from the backseat.
"She not here?" Kevin asked a little surprised.
"Ya she's gone to study."
"Well why didn't you say so! Let's go pick some b*tches." Kevin shouts patting my back a little extra hard.
"He's married." Syed stated, he was a little annoyed at Kevin's comment too.
"She's not here? He has every right to satisfy his needs." Kevin said laughing. The way he said "needs" was so uncomfortable for me.
"Kevin shut the f*ck up before I bust your head straight through the f*cking window what the f*ck is wrong with you." I said not being able to control my anger.
"Dude chill. We're not gonna say anything our lips are locked. She's not gonna know." Kevin said laughing like this was a joke.
"You drank a bit too much I'm dropping you off."I scoffed.
"Oh come on man. See this is why you don't get cuffed so young. If you were single right now we'd all be getting some hot chicks right now." He said looking back at Syed with a dirty smirk. I felt the pressure on my forehead build up. I was getting so frustrated.
"Shut up Kevin you're getting on my nerves. You're not in highschool anymore get a grip." Syed said.
"This is the address." He said showing me.
"Okay drop me off first That's down farther. I got school I need to sleep." Syed said getting irritated. I could tell he just wanted to leave.
"I can't take his drunk ass any more." He added.
I shook my head side to side.
"Tell your misses Syed says Salam." He said putting his hand on my shoulder from behind and I nodded and began driving to the address.
"I'm pretty drunk mind helping on the elevator."
I didn't want to, but for his safety I walked him up to the apartment. I was so sleepy. I just wanted to rest.
"Come in and have coffee." Kevin said opening the door.
"I'm good."
"It's coffee not crack relax you look tired too." He said pulling me in.
I sat on the couch and he called his friend Neha.
She came out in a robe, quickly I looked down to the ground. Great. Why did I agree. It's ok she's his friend.
"Shery can you make Kevin's friend a coffee." She called out.
"Hi sweetheart I'm neha." She said putting her hand out.
"Hi. Im actually really tired I should get going." I said looking at Kevin.
"Relax Let my friend get you some coffee first." She said leaning forward I could see how she was exposing herself to me but I kept praying dua's may Allah protect me.
"Your coffee is ready." I heard the girl say and as soon as I looked up, I looked away from the devil dressed in even less clothing than the robe.
"Oh come on you're so shy." She said giggling. I could tell they were a little tipsy.
"You didn't tell me your friend was so sexy." She said putting the coffee down. I was no longer tired. There is no way I am drinking coffee made from the pig itself. Astaghfirullah.
"It's better when it's forbidden" Kevin called out as I left. Although nothing happened guilt creeped inside of me. I was so angry at myself and what I had allowed for myself to be associated with.
Once I drove home, I deleted Kevin off everything. I was so pissed off. Why did I not be more careful with who I surrounded myself with. I knew Kevin was taking drugs since a young age. I thought he'd eventually straighten himself out after high school. Syed did. But I guess I was wrong.
I went to my basement and put on my boxing gloves. I punched the bag once twice then over and over and over again until I felt my hands tremble. Why did I feel so angry.
I prayed my Isha and prayed some quran then slept. I called Hawa during Fajr time hoping she'd be awake.
"Hawa." I said.
"How are you Taha?" Her voice had a bit of annoyance in it.
"Hawa." I said once again.
"Yes?"
"You didn't watch my stories I've been posting for a while." I closed my eyes as I confessed the petty game I was playing.
"Taha Im here to study. My education is important to me. You chose to post a bunch of things knowing I was upset. Let me be clear. I may be young but I am not going to play along with your petty games. You knew what you were doing posting those snaps.I'm surprised you have that much time in your hands."
"I know, I know I'm really sorry.
"I'm coming just hang on." Her voice was. A bit faded out. Her friends must be waiting for her.
"Hawa I am sorry. Truly I am. I don't know what's wrong with me. We're friends yet I wanted to see you hurt because I was mad at you for being mad at me. I lied to you then sat there with the audacity and the nerve to give you sh- attitude. I promise I will make sure it doesn't happen again." I said hoping she would catch the remorse in my words.
"Thank you. There's no reason for you to lie Taha. We're good friends." She said and I nodded in agreement.
"I wanna tell you something else." I said scratching my forehead. I was scared.
"Taha I gotta go I'm sorry I'll talk to you once I'm home. I'll text you before I call to make sure you're home-
"I'll be home just call me when you're free." I said.
"Ok take care Salam Alaykum." She bid me farwell and hung up.
Two minutes later my phone rang, it was Syed.
"Yo." I said.
"Hey Why'd Kev tell me you was at their apartment?" He asked a little uncomfortable.
"I dropped him off to his apartment. I sat down but buddy brought his friends who were probably drunk or high. I left right away." I said quickly not wanting to remember the night.
"That's not what he said." He said it like there was something else to add. What the hell was going on.
"What do you mean?"
"He says you stayed for a bit..." he said hesitating, it was like he knew something but was holding back.
"Probably cuz I removed him off everything." I scoffed.
"I was grossed out and pissed. But honestly I don't want to be near him anymore. I'm cutting him off." I said.
"Oscar was saying that too." Syed mumbled.
"He's good when he's sober but once he drinks he's just horny and sick." I said shaking my head still disgusted at his words.
"Hang on he sent me a video last night." He said staying on call.
"Yo it don't look too good." He said.
"What is it?" I asked.
"It's you sitting while she serves you but the angle looks sketchy."
"Meet me, I wanna see it." I said under gritted teeth.
"Let's meet later." He said.
"No. Before he sends this anywhere else and makes this go public. Now Syed." I said putting on a pair of pants over my boxers and pulling a hoodie over my head and grabbing my car keys.
"Ok maybe I should go. You stay." He said as I opened my car door. My eyes met with Adnan's. My heart started pounding if he found this video and took it out of context God knows what he'll do to me.
"I'm on my way be out in 15." I said hanging up. Adnan made his way closer to the fence separating our land.
"Salam Alaykum good to see you up so early, what's the occasion?" He asked.
"Walaykum Salam. Just meeting a friend for breakfast." I said with a forced smile.
"Ya? Okay I won't hold you any longer then. Enjoy your breakfast." He said patting my back setting me free.
I waved and drove off to have my "breakfast."
"Salam Alaykum" I called out as he got in the car.
"Show me the video." I said. He pulled his phone out and scrolled to the chat and showed me. Blood rushed through my body.
"I'm going to rip this guys f*cking head off." I said clenching my teeth.
"Relax Taha. He's only sent it to me so far."
"Why would he record me without telling me." I said furrowing my brows together. How was I blind too.
"Slow down I don't wanna die yet." He said as I pressed the gas pedal a little harder.
Once we reached his parents house I banged on the door.
We heard some shouting from the isnide it gave me flashbacks of my own house.
"Ok Taha we're not going to hurt him we're going to ask to delete the video." Syed said looking at me clarifying the plan.
"Ya ya." I said waving it off.
"Taha. Relax a little."
"Syed, if my wife sees that video she's going to be BROKEN, do you understand me?" I said looking at him dead in the eye.
"You can explain it." He said.
"Ya I can but This video will never go away from her mind- she'll always remember it and it will cause her so much pain. I don't want that to happen."
"What the f*ck." Kevin said opening the door he looked dirty as shit.
"Morning kevin. Where's your phone?" I asked walking in shoving past him as he shut the door behind us.
"My room why?"
"Why?" I asked turning to him I looked him dead in the eye restraining myself from shoving my fist straight down his throat.
"Unlock it." I said taking it off his bed and slapping it in his hand.
"The f*ck is this it's 6 am you wnana see my phone? You my b*tch now? I don't owe you shit get the f*ck out both of you my parents are sleeping." He scoffed.
"Shut the f*ck up and do what the f*ck I just said you dumb little c*nt who the f*ck do you think you are recording me without telling me you little b*tch." I said grabbing him by the shirt and shoving him to the wall .
"Oh the video. Is this what this is about? I just thought Syed wanted to see the beautiful lady you made love to." He teased with a smirk.
"You little c*nt Lie again and I'll bust your jaw open. Lie the f*ck AGAIN!" I threatened.
"Unlock it." Syed said holding the phone out. He did as he was told. We made sure to delete it and check all his messages to make sure he only sent it to Syed.
"Let's go." Syed said taking my arm.
"Pull some shit like this again, no warnings I'll burn this b*tch up." I said throwing his phone at the wall.
"What a b*tch" I scoffed as we walked out of the house and into the car.
The rest of the car ride was quiet.
"You okay?" Syed asked breaking the silence mid way.
"Yeah."
"Never seen you this angry." He said looking at me a little worried.
"Don't mention today again. Hawa won't like it." I said making sure he knew not to talk about this. Ever.
"Remind me to never cross a man in love." He said making me grin a little.
"She was my crush yet you got stuck with her." He mumbled.
"She's your sister now." I said unlocking his door and letting him go home.
"Ya ya, see ya." He said waving me off as I drove back home.
My head was hurting the heat in my body was finally cooling off. I got home and went straight for a cold shower.
I prayed some quran to calm me down then studied for a bit. I realized this isn't the life I wanted to live. If I wanted to change then I had to change my companionship. That would mean leaving Syed behind too.
Hawa called me a few hours later.
"Salam Alaykum." Her voice alone made me feel calmer.
"Walaykum Salam." I responded
"How are you?" She asked .
"Better." I Saadi
"Good, you wanted to tell me soemthing." Her voice had a bit of nervousness in it but she was trying to hide it.
"Yes. Are you in your dorm?" I asked.
"Yes."
"What I'm about to tell you might hurt you a little. I went out with Syed guys. Oscar and Syed were fine obviously. Kevin was drunk he had a couple beers. I dropped him last. He told me to get some coffee I was tired and he needed me to help him walk just incase.So he invited me in and girls were there. I left almost Immidietly. Nothing else happened but I wanted to let you know before it came from anyone else. After that I got rid of Kevin from my phone. I think I have to change my friends." I said as quickly as I could.
"Hmm interesting. Do I need to send Kevin a paramedic?" She asked followed with a giggle.
"No no, what makes you say that."
"Knowing Kevin and knowing you. You guys faught a lot when you were teenagers." She said laughing.
"Oh Oscar and Syed said hi and Salam." I said and I heard her whisper a Walaykum Salam.
"I'm sorry Hawa. I've been a horrible friend slash husband. Im going to do my best to be good." I said.
"I'm glad you're becoming self aware, how do you feel?"
"Better after telling you. Your voice is soothing." I said shutting my eyes realizing how dumb I sounded telling her that.
"Don't be weird." She said giggling a little.
"That's the husband in me talking." I said laughing.
"Have you been studying?" She asked.
"Ya a bit. I gotta study more though."
We talked for a few hours until she had to pray and we hung up.
I realized two things by the end of the week. The wedding night kiss wasn't going to be a topic of discussion, it was clear that she wanted to stay as friends and my sisters seems to be right. She was probably still not over him. It's only been a few months. She didn't want anything more why else would she leave right after the wedding. I was also in no place to force her into a relationship given the fact that I proposed to her on the basis of friendship.
I thought about the conversations I had aswell. I was not husband material. I wanted to live freely go out and all that. If I choose to love her I have to give up my freedom.
-
Hawa's POV.
By the time I was going back Taha was placed in another city for work so we wouldn't see each other for over 4 minths. We hadn't been talking much. It use to be every 2-3 days unless we had news but as the months went by we would talk once a week for long hours. Usually Saturdays.
Once my plane landed Adnan had come to pick me up.
As soon as I saw him I dropped my bags and hugged him.
"I missed you." He whispered resting his chin onto my head.
I smiled to myself then looked at Iqra who ran over and hugged me.
"Where's my hug! I knew you liked him better than me!" She said making me laugh.
"That's not true!"
"You must be tired, you want Starbucks to get some caffein?" Adnan asked taking my bags.
"Sure." I said.
We got our drinks and sat at the cafeteria and talked about everything and nothing. Once we got home my parents came out and hugged me. Some of my family had also come by . Including my in laws.
I was going to graduate after my unpaid work. So they did a little surprise for me.
We hadn't decided where I would be staying. Apparently Tasneem was also staying at their house.
Later everyone left, except for my in laws. My mom was in the kitchen making coffee whilst the rest of us sat in the living room. Danial was happily sitting on my lap. He kept turning his head up to look at me with a big smile, it was like he was making sure I was still there, since I left.
"I understand that Tasneem is staying with you guys, Taha is also not here. I think it would be most fitting that Hawa stay with us until Taha returns." My father said looking around the room to see how everyone would react.
"Brother with all due respect, I don't think this is right. She is Taha's wife and responsibility. We did the reception too so I think she can stay with us right Hawa?" My mother in law said looking at me.
Before I could respond my mom came in with the coffee and my dad helped serve the coffee then they both sat down.
"I wanna stay with Hawa!" Danial said looking at me his eyes twinkling in excitement.
"When Taha comes back she can come live with you. What is she going to do without her husband present?" My dad argued. My mom rested her hand on his taking his attention. I think she was trying to tell him to be less harsh.
"Look sister I know you've been wanting Hawa as your daughter but I would prefer she come when Taha returns" he said looking up we all turned to see Adnan finally come back from his call.
"What's going on?" He asked taking a seat next to me.
"They want Hawa to stay with them." My dad said.
"That's out of the question." Adnan said looking at my dad.
"I said that."
"Can Hawa stay for one night at least?" Danial asked looking at Adnan with sad eyes, quickly I hugged him and kissed the top of his head.
"What about you sleep over here for the night?" Adnan asked leaning down to him with a smile.
"Oh boy can I!" He shouted excitedly looking at his mom.
"I'll stay too!" Tahera said.
Ayan , Tasneem and her mom all exchanged glances.
"Sure why not? is that okay with you guys?" My mother in law asked.
"Of course it is!" My dad said.
A couple minutes later everyone left. Danial was so excited I was actually so happy he got to stay.
"I missed you so much Hawa. Don't ever just go without me. How come you never taked me wif you? I thought you were my fwend." He asked putting his marker down and looking at my tired face.
"I didn't want to go. I went for school. We are friends! Always." I said smiling at him.
"Ok. Promise?" He asked.
"I promise."
"Your phone's ringing." Tahera said giving me my phone. It was Taha.
I told him the situation and he said he was coming back soon anyway so it should be fine.
He told me to try to talk to Tahera but she seemed off today.
"Um can I borrow your clothes." She asked.
"Ofourse!" I said opening my closet.
"I kept some of my clothes here." I said to her.
After I changed I put Danial on my single bed and Tahera and me decided to sleep in Iqra's old room.
"Why'd you marry my brother ?" Tahera asked breaking the silence.
"Or wait. Better question why did my brother marry you?" She asked then continued.
"You're pretty quiet. You barely talk. He talks a lot. He always has shit to say to me." She scoffed.
"We're all a little different." I said with a smile.
"Question. Did he marry you because he felt bad for you?"
I looked at her a little surprised by her indirect insulting question.
"Why would he do that? He didn't owe me marriage." I said.
"Well, no offence but your ex fiancé left you. Nobody else would marry you after. So I guess he did out of pity."
I smiled then sighed.
"Tahera do you want to be married one day?" I asked.
"Ya of course." She said.
"What would happen if you never got married? How would you feel?"
"That won't happen. I'm gorgeous I have a good personality, I'm kind and I won't find someone that would leave." She said her eyes were looking directly at me it was like she was testing me.
"How would you feel if you're 40 and unmarried?"I asked.
"What's the point of life if you have nobody to spend it with? I'd probably be miserable and hate my life."
"We'll I wouldn't. My life doesn't revolve around my ability to have a spouse. Sure I would miss out on a sunnah and maybe the beauty of companionship but there's still more to life than marriage. Don't you think?" I asked looking at her.
"To you maybe. To me I need to find someone I think it's important." She said scrolling on her phone.
"Everybody has the right to decide what's important to them and what isn't. Your quality of life can be good as long as you make good decisions and don't let the bad ones make you lose hope." I said and I could see her rolling her eyes.
"I don't blame you. Someone married you out of pity, that's why you have a backwards way of thinking." She said shrugging.
I stayed silent trying to understand why she was making personal attacks.
"Are you upset with me Tahera?" I asked I could tell she was surprised by my question.
"If I've done something to cause resentment in you then please let me know."
"I was just speaking my mind. It's not personal." She stated. I nodded.
"How'd your learn to french braid? You wear a hijab all the time don't you?" She asked suspiciously making me laugh.
"Ofcourse but not at home. So I learned to do it. Want me to do it for you?" I asked.
"Sure!" She said.
She wanted two so I parted her hair from the middle and braided it for her.
"You have beautiful hair Tahera MashAllah." I said.
"I know. Thanks."
"What were you like in highschool? Did you have a lot of friends?" She asked.
"Um I had class friends. But during lunch I spent my time at the library. I liked my time alone."
"Did you go to prom and stuff?" She asked.
"No. I didn't think I would fit in to that. I wear a hijab and didn't want to put myself in a place where it will be disrespected."
"How would it be disrespected?"
"Loud music, if I wanted to pray I would not be able to I don't think. Boys and girls dancing it's not my place."
"Hijabis go though."
"Ya but I chose not to. I would rather be at the library." I said laughing.
"Didnt my brother prompose to you?" She asked turning her head.
"Ya he did. I said yes even though I didn't go."
"Neither did he. I wish you went so he would have gone too." She said
"I thought he did." I said.
"No."
"Wait how do you know he promposed to me?"
"This girl I know told me."
"You're all done." I said tying the last bit as she ran to the mirror.
"Oh my gosh I love it. Thank you!" She said hugging me.
"No problem." I said.
We closed the lights and I laid on the ground whilst Tahera slept up top. A few minutes later There was a quiet knock. I asked who it was but no Response. Another knock. I opened it only to see Danial looking at me with sad eyes.
"I wanna sleep wif you Hawa." He asked hugging my leg.
"Come on in then." I said closing the door and letting him lay next to me. He was so cute.
When I got up for fajr Danial had woken up and prayed with me. I was astonished.
Taha's POV.
I was doing my unpaid work far away. It's been a week and it's been hell. Everybody was so talkative and although I was too I felt out of place.
"We're going out for drinks later. It would be nice if you came." Danielle said.
"I don't drink." I said.
"Oh. We can do dinner instead Im sure they won't mind." She said trying to convince me.
"Uh right after work?"
"Ya. Come on it'll be fun."
"Tell me you convinced him." Ashley said walking in after her break.
"I did. I'll give you a. Ride." She said putting her hand on my shoulders.
"Is it a fancy place cause Im not really into that."
"Tell you what? We can just go to a burger joint near by." She said.
"I don't want you guys to adjust it cause of me."
"We don't mind. So long as you come."
"That's nice of you guys."
"You look so sad all the time. You must be really homesick."
"I guess so."
I didn't know what it was, I simply didn't like it here. I never spoke to Hawa for a while either. I kind of needed her to remind me of that home feeling.
I acknowledged that even if I was just a rebound, we were still friends.
I sat in the car with Danielle and waited for the car ride to be over. I tried conversing with her but it felt so dreadful. She was trying so hard to entertain me but I just wanted to go home.
"Its nice here once you get use to it don't stress too much." Ashley said attempting to put her hand on mine but I quickly moved mine.
"You're not going to eat?" Tyson asked.
"Nah not hungry." I said leaning back with a sigh.
"It's pretty obvious you hate it here." Vincent said laughing.
"I'll have to agree with him." Tyson said laughing.
"I'm sorry. I think I just miss my home town."
"I can make you forget it." Danielle said nearly making me choke.
"I should go. I'm really tired." I said.
"I'll walk you out." Danielle said I really couldn't stop myself from rolling my eyes at her offer.
I knew she was that universally attractive female. Tyson and Vincent were always trying to catch her attention at the pharmacy. Why wont she just take one of them.
"Was that you rejecting my offer?" She asked as she turned to see my reaction. God she was bold.
"I'm married." I said. I watched as her eyes lowered to my hands.
"I don't see a ring."
"We dont have rings." I said.
"My offer is still on the table."
"Like I said I have a wife who I'm very happy with."
"She doesn't need to know Taha. Just look at me. You know you want me." She said biting her lip.
"We're coworkers. I respect you as that."
"Not even one night?" She asked.
"It won't mean anything just sex." She said.
"I'm not that guy." I repeated, holding myself from cussing her out.
"Do you want a sneak peak then decide?" She asked.
"My cabs here, enjoy the rest of your night. Please don't bring this conversation up again or I'll change my shifts specifically so we don't have to cross paths." I said very annoyed.
"Taha."
"Good night." I said.
I was really angry. The fact that I repeatedly said no without degrading her. I shouldn't have to.
"Tough night?" The driver asked and I sighed.
"A bit." I responded going on my contacts to see If Hawa had seen my text. The car randomly swerved pushing me to the side.
"Sorry!" He shouted.
"What happened anyway?" He asked.
"Ugh nothing, this girl was after me. I just want to go home to my wife." I said almost laughing. The thought of Hawa just made me calmer.
"Wish my wife talked about me like that. You must love her."
"Don't know about love but my God she just has something about her presence that makes my misery feel less miserable. I could use that magic of hers you know." I said slouching back.
Once I got to my hotel I hopped into bed and called Hawa.
Her Salam itself made me feel better then earlier.
"Walaykum Salam. How are you?" I asked.
"I'm okay. You called me earlier but didn't talk."
"Ya I saw on the call log. Weird. You..did you hear anything? The cab swerved I think that's when I called."
"Not really. How are you?" She asked.
"I'm okay Hawa. I um. I don't like it here."
"Just 3 more weeks. You'll be home soon." She said reassuring me.
"Um. This girl was hitting on me."
"She probably saw your smile." She said laughing a little.
"What does that mean?"
"It means you have a beautiful smile."
"Oh. You think that?"
"Everyone does."
"Nobody's said that."
"Am I a nobody?"
"Ofcourse not. I'm glad you picked up I've been homesick. I really hate it here man." I said scratching the back of my head.
"You'll be home soon. It's an experience, make the best of it."
"Uhuh. Easy for you to say."
"I just witnessed our family's arguing Taha it wasn't the prettiest sight."
"Ya ya. How is Tahera. Spending time with you?"
"Yes lots."
"Good. I'm glad she is, I wish you stayed here for the past months. I feel like things would have been better for her."
"She's growing up. We can only guide, she gets to choose her outcome."
We talked some more and at last she must have fallen asleep.
The weeks went by slow but eventually I got home.
Ayan had come to pick me up and as soon as I opened my door and laid eyes on my wife it was like seeing her for the first time. I never asked to face time her because what was I supposed to say? Face time me I miss your face?
I knew our feelings would never be mutual.