{I want to kill Kenji
I'm sure you can understand
Actually, it's not just "want"-- I may actually o throw him out a window
Kick him on to the path of an oncoming vehicle
Drown him in hair gel
If you read about in the news—please don't ask why
Just know he deserved it}
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"Those letters aren't for OUR Ben," you straight up lie.
"Oh?"
You give Sammy a pleading look, willing her not to connect any more dots.
Kenji isn't sold.
"What Ben do you know that you need to write 50 letters to?"
"Just someone. You don't know him"
If that's true, you won't mind if we take a look." Kenji is lifting himself from his position on the couch, eying you as he makes a leap for the desk.
You try and jump onto him, prevent him from even touching them, but you're too slow. And he's just a little too tall. You reach (and kick!) But he's got the letters in his hand, and peels one out of its envelope. Keeping the paper high above his head, he tilts his head to read, and you give up. Caught.
Mercifully, Kenji doesn't read the letter aloud, but his eyes scan the page hurriedly and when he's done his look is... infuriating.
"Robbin' the cradle, Yaz. I love it."
You rip the letter from his grasp. "You're one to talk."
Kenji looks sheepish for once and you're happy to finally score a point.
"In my defense, I have the emotional age of a fourteen-year-old. You're like a thirty-year-old cynic trapped inside the body of a high school senior."
"And Ben?"
Kenji looks thoughtful. "Somewhere in between?"
You look away.
"Don't be embarrassed. It's nice."
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{Did you know that Wendy is older than Peter?
Well, it seems that way, because she continues to age.
But on the inside—Peter's the one who is ancient. Possibly even hundreds of years old!
Anyway, it doesn't matter.
Or Does it?}
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You hear them talking about you in the other room.
"Do you think she's gonna be ok?"
"Of course, Sammie. It's Yaz. She'll bounce back."
"I'm worried."
There's a long pause. Though you can't quite make out what Kenji says, you can tell he says it in his rare very serious tone.
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{At school, I've taken to hiding in the library.
There's not that many other places that aren't over crowded with people.
But in this faraway nook
I've yet to encounter a single soul
It must've been an office at one point,
but now its more like storage
Filled to the brim with boxes and catalogues
It's dusty up here, but there's a nice view of the track
students look like ants shuffling to and fro
Up here, I feel above it all
Nestled in A fortified tree house}
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"Did you cancel your appointment with Dr. Simmons?" Mom asks, looking worried.
"Just rescheduled."
"Why?"
She knows there's nothing pressing going on in your life. Nothing at all.
"Homework. I've got too much of it this week. I needed to reschedule."
Mom looks away, but she doesn't seem satisfied.
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{Considering there are hundreds of books up here,
You'd think at least one would be a gripping read.
But they're mostly outdated scientific journals
And biographies of people no one remembers.
I've taken to bringing my own reading material,
Nestling on a dusty old couch in the corner
And letting my book take me elsewhere.
I'm ''sending' you a page
You'll like it:
________To induce her to look up at him he pretended to be going away, and when this
failed he sat on the end of the bed and tapped her gently with his foot.
"Wendy," he said, "don't withdraw. I can't help crowing, Wendy,
when I'm pleased with myself."
Still she would not look up, though she listened.
"Wendy," he continued, in a voice that no woman has ever yet been able to resist,
"one girl is more use than twenty boys."
Now Wendy was every inch a woman, though there were not very many inches,
and she peeped out from the corners of her comforter.
"Do you really think so, Peter?"
"Yes, I do."
"That's perfectly sweet of you to say," she declared, getting up and sitting with him on
the side of the bed. "I'll give you a kiss if you'd like."
But Peter did not know what she meant, and he held out his hand expectantly.
"Surely you know what a kiss is?" she asked, aghast.
"I shall know when you give it to me," he replied stiffly.
Not to hurt his feeling she gave him a thimble.
"Now," said he, "shall I give you a kiss?" and she replied with a slight primness,
"If you please."
She made herself rather cheap by inclining her face toward him, but
he merely dropped an acorn button into her hand, so she slowly returned her face to
where it had been before, and said nicely that she would wear his kiss on the chain
around her neck.__________
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"Has anyone heard from Ben?"
It's Kenji asking, of course, in your weekly zoom with the rest of the gang. You've tried to get out of going, not because you don't love them all, but because you're just not feeling it sometimes. But Kenji is so annoying when you bail and Sammy gets that scared tone in her voice, so it's easier just to show up.
You say nothing to his question—it's not like you know. And though there was a playfulness to Kenji's tone, you know he's not asking just to tease you.
"I've texted him a few times. Phone does that thing where you know your message didn't get through."
"I heard he's gone off grid for a while," Darius offers. "Trying to recover from everything that happened."
There's a beat of silence as they nod or look away, understanding full well the desire to escape.
"Is there reason to worry?" Brooklyn asks, sensing something in Kenji's inquiry.
"Nah. Just wondering. Kinda miss the kid."
He's careful not to look at her when he says that, or maybe she's just imagining that because this is zoom after all.
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{Where are you, Ben?
I'm not just asking
because of this ridiculous crush I'm harboring
(are you happy I can admit that's what this is?)
In all seriousness,
We're starting to worry about you.
All of us.}