By the time I turned 18, I knew I'd find my mate. I also knew he couldn't be anyone with whom I would ever be able to settle down and be safe with. Since I had spent most of my life as a slave to the Silver Moon Pack, I knew there was no one I already knew who could make me happy, and me them. Which meant I would have to reject my mate, or he belonged to another pack. Which also wouldn't work, considering my status. Maybe one of the wolves in my pack would be willing to turn a blind eye to me if the bond is strong, but a stranger? Highly unlikely. Odds were high that they would pretend I didn't exist, then reject me at their first convenience.
As soon as the clock hit midnight and I was 18, I felt something strange tugging at my chest. It was almost painful. I tried to ignore it, but all the signs pointed to one thing.
The mate bond.
I had no choice but to let the feeling tug me out of my bed in the attic of the pack house, drag me down the stairs and down the hall of the west section of the building. My feet and hands felt like they were buzzing; I would have been scared, if I didn't already know what was happening.
The tug pulled me to the end of the corridor and stopped me in front of the last door at the end. At first, all I heard was silence. Then, a rustle. Small movements. My heart beat loudly in my chest. I knew whose room this was. This was going to be a lot harder than I thought it was.
Before I knew what was happening, I saw my hand reaching forward and opening the door handle. I panicked and tried to pull it back, but the damage was already done. The door creaked open slowly, and revealed the contents of the room in the soft glow of light that came from the hallway behind me. Skin and sweat glistened between the occupants on the bed before me, moving and twisting as if they were the same being. I felt a stab in my chest, so powerful I physically took a step back from the brunt of it.
The figures in the room were still going; I could almost make out exactly what was happening. The man was leaning over a thin girl on the bed, her legs spread out on either side of him as he thrust inside her quickly. They were panting, breathing hard and had no idea who was standing in the doorway. I tried blinking the image away, but it was almost burned into my mind.
"Rhea?"
I started, looking up quickly in horror as I saw the man and the woman were now both looking at me. She looked awkward, but annoyed as well. She didn't know why I was here. He, however, looked just as heartbroken as I felt. It wasn't that I necessarily had feelings for this man, but I knew who he was, and he knew who I was. The mate bond, however, was strong. It was enough to make almost anyone fall in love with anyone on the spot. But not like this. And the fact that I'd just caught him in bed with a random wolf didn't help. I knew he did this sort of thing often enough, though.
"Ethan," I replied, my voice shaky. I took another unsteady step backwards. "Sorry."
I turned and bolted down the hallway, back to the stairs. I made it to the attic door right as I heard footsteps running after me, but I managed to barricade myself in the room before he could reach me.
"Rhea, please," he begged, knocking on the door. He knocked quietly, though. I definitely noticed that little maneuver. "I- I didn't know we were mates. If I did, I never would have-"
"What, tortured me?" I shot back icily. "You've been horrible to me ever since I came here."
"I didn't know you were my mate!" he tried. "I didn't mean to mistreat you, I promise."
"What, so you're ready to give up casual fucking and settle down with me?" I demanded. He didn't reply. "That's what I thought. Why don't you piss off and leave me alone?"
"I don't want to reject you, Rhea. I know it could kill you, and me. It's not just you that feels hurt, okay? I will too."
"So you're just wanting to protect yourself," I bit off. "How wonderful for me. Well, how about this? I, Rhea Riverwood of the Silver Moon Pack, reject you, Ethan Hollows, son of Alpha Turner of the Silver Moon Pack."
I felt the same smack in the chest that I'm sure Ethan felt when the magic that coursed between us was suddenly severed. I gasped at the sheer force of the feeling, sliding down to the floor as my knees began to shake.
"You bitch," he hissed, and I could feel the agony in his voice. "We could have made it work. We could have been subtle. Fuck!"
"You know I would feel it every time you would betray me, Ethan," I spat back angrily. "If you really cared about me, you would have severed the bond first."
I sat like that on the floor of my dusty attic room for what felt like hours. I couldn't tell when Ethan skulked back to his room, but I knew he would be fine. It took me days to recover physically, by which point I had vowed that no matter how long it took, I was going to get the hell out of this shit hole, even if it took years.
By the time I turned 21, I was still stuck in the same shit hole, in the same room with the same horrible people. The only difference being I finally managed to get in contact with my wolf. Her name was Arya, and she made herself known to me weeks late because of the mate bond I broke before I had time to meet her. It took a harder toll on her, which I feared when I still hadn't met her weeks later. But now, at 21, we were closer than ever, regardless of the fact that we were still in the same place we were 3 years ago. Something had to change, we knew it. But still we waited, biding our time. The moon goddess would give us something, I was sure. She had to. She couldn't give me a mate like Ethan and expect me to want to stay after that. Surely not.
And, just as I thought, a sign was sent. The Alpha King was to be visiting the Silver Moon pack in the next few days, and I knew I could use the commotion to find a way to slip out on my own. No one would notice me missing until after everything returned to the way it was. The Alpha would want me out of the way so my sight wouldn't offend the royals, meaning my escape would be handed to me on a silver platter. I just had to wait.
The day came quicker than expected. Everyone was racing around the pack house and the grounds, making sure everything was in order. I expected to be given a million jobs to do to help in preparation, but to my surprise, my only orders were to stay out of the way.
I heard the exact moment the royal family arrived. There were screams of anticipation and panic, which I followed outside to the edge of the grounds. The Alpha of my pack and his Luna were standing at the forest's edge side-by-side, with Ethan standing just slightly behind them. The Beta of the pack stood with him, and everyone else of importance in their places. I stood to the back of the small crowd of people that had gathered to watch, keeping my head down to avoid anyone seeing me.
They emerged from what seemed to be the trees themselves, and my breath caught in my throat as I saw them come onto our land. The King walked at the front, slowly and with measured steps. He was very tall; with muscles I could see from the back of the crowd. I couldn't see his face because I was so far away, but I could see his soft brown hair glinting with golden flecks beneath the setting sun, and it sent shivers down my spine. I suddenly felt very self-conscious of my ragged boots, brown pants and loose white shirt as I saw a few females in beautiful robes follow behind him, but I tried not to think about it too much. They were from the Dusk Light pack, a pack that had only recently been stated as the Royals, but they had always been nobles, in line for the royal throne, and I had always been a slave.
As they moved closer, I felt a sudden hitch in my throat. I gasped a little as it made me choke, lifting a hand slowly to my throat. I frowned as I coughed, ducking my head as a few people in front of me turned to check what the noise was about. I glanced around, feeling my heartrate rise quickly as my eyes went to land on the back of Ethan's head. He hadn't even flinched; whatever was happening to me, it wasn't the mate bond. Although it felt awfully similar...
I felt a hard tug in my gut that almost made me bump into the woman in front of me, making my eyes widen in disbelief. Surely not. This could not be happening. I already had a mate, and I rejected him three years ago. This couldn't be right. But as I lifted my head quickly to where my heart was pulling me towards, my eyes locked with the last person I ever would have imagined.
The Alpha King.
I almost felt like throwing up. I couldn't do this again; it was a known thing amongst wolves that if your mate bond is severed, it can sometimes cause death. If I had to go through two? I surely wouldn't survive the night.
But our eyes were locked, and the only reaction I received that made me see he knew, was his eyes narrowing slightly. But other than that, I got nothing. He averted his gaze again, arriving before the Alpha of Silver Moon and the Luna, dropping his head slightly in their presence. They exchanged a few words, but I couldn't even remember how to swallow. My mouth felt dry and my skin was icy cold. At the same time, I felt like I was running a fever. I had to go.
As the King and a few of his people were welcomed into the pack, I slipped out the back of the crowd and ran as quickly as I could to my room. I made it up the stairs and didn't even bother closing the door. I grabbed the nearest bag and threw it on my bed, taking clothes from the floor and the shelf and shoving them in. There was no way I could stay here for the foreseeable future with my old mate and my second mate in the same house, there was no way. There was only so much shit I could take.
I heard the house being filled with people and knew the King was here too; I could feel the faint buzz in my heart that longed for me to run down and claim him as mine. I ignored it as I threw the bag under my bed, leaving the room and shutting the door. I skipped dinner by fleeing the house out one of the back doors and headed for the training grounds. The sun had just about set now, and basked the grounds in a warm soft glow. I grabbed a sword out the bucket on my way through the gate and stretched my arms and legs out before I started. The arena was empty; everyone was fawning over the King and his attendants, making sure they got a glance here or a smile there. Me, on the other hand, wanted to be as far away from him and his stupid golden hair as possible. I couldn't stop myself from giving in last time, so I sure as hell was not going to be as weak this time. If he didn't have the nerve to address me as his mate and pretend nothing happened, he clearly knew I was not good enough for him and would not have me. It would be easier if we didn't converse at all, and he just went back to his beautiful castle and forgot all about me.
I started my training by swinging the blade in my hands around a few times, then targeted my attacks at the dummy on the other side of the arena. I swung an arm out from my right and hacked into the wood, sending splinters flying as I yanked it out and pulled my arm down. I kept hacking at it, feeling a sudden anger rise within me that was being expressed in my attacks at this poor representation of a person. I didn't stop. Not when I started sweating, not when I started swearing, not when my arms began to ache and my knees began to wobble. I only stopped when the blade dropped out of my hand and I dropped to my knees, breathing hard. I was beaten by a stupid log.
"Are you alright?"
I whirled around quickly, still on one knee as I lifted one foot on the ground to swivel myself around. When I saw who it was, I had to stop myself from biting my tongue.
"Fine, thanks, your Royal Highness" I replied, still out of breath. He held his hand out to me, a still expression on his face. I glanced at it, my heart rate accelerating slightly. In response, I put my hand on my knee and hauled myself up, stumbling slightly in the dust as my legs tried to support my weight again. He dropped his hand slowly. In this time, I took a moment to study his face. His features were hard but gentle, strong but soft. The way his hair hung over his stormy grey eyes sent my stomach into backflips, and it was all I could do not to drop to my knees and ask him not to reject me right then and there.
"Who are you?" he asked finally, his voice the sound of velvet and honey. I put a hand on my chest and bowed in a very overexaggerated way, sticking my other arm out to my left. When I straightened up, he was narrowing his eyes at me.
"A slave," I answered, almost sneering at the word. When his eyes narrowed more, I sighed. "Rhea," I said, crossing my arms over my chest to stop him from seeing how much I was shaking. "Rhea Riverwood. Are you supposed to have bodyguards? Aren't you afraid I'm going to try kill you or something?"
"No."
I raised an eyebrow, but didn't say anything in return.
"You can't tell anyone."
His words hit me hard, but I was ready for them. I grimaced slightly, but did my best to hide it as I squeezed my arms in response.
"Fine," I said, nodding at him but not wanting to meet his eyes.
I was met with silence.
"Was there anything else?" I bit off, my tone a little more irritated than I intended it to be. He raised an eyebrow at me, and I felt almost naked as he studied me. His expression wasn't completely cold, but I couldn't figure out what else it held.
"I wasn't expecting this," he admitted eventually, as if this were the easiest topic in the world. "I didn't ask for it to happen right now. In fact, the timing is rather terrible. And I'm sorry for that. But no one can know about this, okay? No one."
"I said fine," I snapped. "Why don't you just reject me and put me out of my misery? I guarantee I can do it again."
He blinked, taken aback by her sudden outburst. "You... already had a mate? And you were rejected? Who is he?"
"You don't need to know," I replied, tilting my head to one side as I narrowed my eyes at him. "If you want to keep secrets, then so can I."
"I don't want to reject you," he explained quickly, taking a small step toward me. I instinctively took a small step back, trying to keep the distance between us. It was harder when I could smell the sandalwood and cinnamon that was his scent. "I don't want you to get hurt, okay? But I can't be your mate right now. I just can't."
"Like I said, I've already done this once before. I can deal with another rejection, I don't care."
"I'm not rejecting you," he growled, and his grey eyes almost darkened to black when he spoke. My eyes narrowed more, but I didn't say anything. "But I can't leave you here. I want you to come back to the Dusk Light pack. I can give you a room in my castle, and you won't have to be a slave."
"Would I have freedom?"
He hesitated.
"Then no thanks. I'd be worse off than I am here. At least I get the freedom to roam the grounds and keep a job. I won't be your mistress, and I won't be a helpless child locked away in a small room for the rest of my life. If you don't want me – which I doubt you would as you are a King and I am a slave – then you should save yourself the hassle and reject me now before I do it for you."
He screwed his face up in frustration and looked like he was about to throw a punch at the dummy behind me. "Don't," he warned me as he went to turn and walk away. "If you do, I'll kill you."
I smiled sarcastically. The King was angry with me. Great way to start off.