Shehnaaz! Shehnaaz! She could hear her name being called time and again and she groaned before finally opening her eyes and looking around the surroundings, this wasn't her home, this place lacked her husbands warmth, not even Maa is there to hold her when she breaks and this is what she chose for herself at least for the next three days.
" Shehnaaz are you up" She could hear the voice again, someone was probably knocking the door but she was feeling so weak all of a sudden, her head was throbbing and she felt lethargic because of how she slept while crying her eyes out last night she knew. Still she dragged herself out of the bed and that small distance between the bed and the door felt as if she has to travel about 2km to finally open the door.
She unbolted the door and found Shalini with a glass of juice for her. She forced a smile on her face and got aside so that she could come inside
" Morning Shehnaaz"
" Morning Di"
"Shehnaaz kya hua hai bacha, you alright" Shalini asked looking at how disheveled she looked at present.
" Yaa I'm fine, I will just come" She spoke and disappeared in the washroom as she really don't want to breakdown in front of her, no matter how close she gets to her but still can't change the fact of her being her husband's best friend and she definitely don't want her husband to keep, worrying about her for the whole day, probably for the first time in these years he is on a day off and she wants him to rest without a worry about her, the doting wife she has been in these four years only if she knew her husband won't be staying in the home and is probably sitting in his cabin in the hospital checking the patients or who knows maybe in an OT without even an ounce of sleep and rest.
Once done with her morning routine She washed her face with water, wiped it with a face towel, brushed her teeths and came out to find Shalini probably talking on a call.
" Haan Aunty Main mast hoon ek dum, are ek dum Jhakas"
She could guess it was Maa and her eyes filled up again, she was missing her.
" Arey Shehnaaz aa gayi, aaja idhar aa bacha" Shalini spoke patting the space on the bed and she nodded wipping her eyes with the back of her hands before she could see them.
" Haan Aunty uth gayi, nhi thak gayi thi na isliye pehle uthaya nahi, Haan Sidharth bol kar gaya tha shoot hain na iska 10 baje isliye abhi dekhne aai thi"
" Haan Lo kar lo main deti hoon"
"Shehnaaz Aunty wants to talk to you, she is calling you from so long, lo baat kar lo" She said handing her phone to her and Shehnaaz took the phone.
" Maa" She spoke and Shalini understood she needed privacy so she went outside giving them the space she needed indicating her to finish the glass of juice as well.
" Shehnaaz bacha kaisi hai"
" Theek hoon, Aap kaise ho"
" Main toh mast ekdum, Tu aayi kyun nhi iske saath, Maa ki yaad nhi aa rahi thi"
"Maa bahut aa rahi hai na, but.... par kaam bhi toh zaroori hai na, Adi kaisi hai, theek hai na abhi"
" Adi is fine usko kya hua tha, abhi Raju ko ched kar gayi hai, Aur haan Kaam bhi zaroori hai"
" Aap kya kar rahe ho" She asked picking up her phone to see the time, 9:15 it read. She might have finished with the breakfast after coming back from the mandir, down in their society she guessed.
" Mandir se aayi thi, Khana kha rahi hoon, aaja tujhe bhi khilati hoon apne haath se"
" Maa" She whispered her eyes welling up, was there anything to cry, probably not but she just couldn't help it, it was as if someone has opened all the ducts of her lacrimal gland, No this is not her speaking, this is spoken by her husband alot of times when she cries. Although she had an idea about the tear glands but these anatomical terms are still as anonymous to her as the novels he reads, but some of these words she has learnt from him which he uses so frequently.
" Ro kyun rahi hai bacha"
" Pata nhi bahut zyada rona aa raha hai, sabki yaad aati hai, phir rona aata hai, phir theek ho jata hai, phir phir se rona aata hai, mujhe nhi pta kya ho raha hai" She mumbled
"Arey Mera bacha, Sidharth ko kyun aane diya phir, rok leti na usse vahi"
" Kya karte voh yahan Maa, main bhi toh abhi shoot par jaungi, Bore ho jaate voh yahan, aap raho aaj unke saath" She spoke but she knew maa would have already got an idea about something wrong between them.
" Bhejun usko vapis "
" Nhi Maa kham kha pareshaan hoga, mera toh aise hi chalta rehta hai" She mumbled again.
" Acha rona band karo pehle toh, vipe your face, chalo fast" She spoke and I obliged her wiping my face.
" Hmm toh Shalini voh juice laayi hai na finish that chalo fatafat"
"Maa nahana hai abhi, Abhi toh uthi thi, kal raat voh... Bahut late aankh lagi na meri, bas.... Nahakar pee lungi"
" Nhi, tab tak kharab ho jaayega, Finish it first"
" Lekin... "
" No lekin Shehnaaz, Bhagwaan dil main hote hai bacha, ek din bina nahaye kha logi toh unhe bura nhi lagega alright, I know your parents made you follow this from your bachpan, which is correct to an extent but not when you feel lethargic, health is important than everything alright, you have to grow up mera bacha, ek bacha hai na andar, nhi khaogi toh kaise chalega"
" Aapko kaise pta main lethargic feel kar rahi hoon" She spoke picking up the glass and having a sip, it was tasty, just as she liked but still she couldn't bring it in herself to finish it after 3/4th glass.
" Bas Maa aur nhi" She mumbled.
" Haan ok chalega, so about you being tired, Maa hoon awaaz se bata sakti hoon kuch galat hai" and she sighed.
" Maa main rakhun 9:30 ho gaye na, Shoot par jaana hai Vikram ka call bhi aa raha hai, taiyaar hona hai, breakfast karna hai"
" Arey bas meri maa, Kitna bolegi, abhi kahan gayi thakaan"
" Maa yaar "
" No yaar, now get up, get ready and do your best alright, shaam ko baat karte hai, also no skipping of meals, stay hydrated, zyada se zyada khao piyo"
"Haww aap chahte ho main moti hoon jaoon maa"
" Haan mera bacha yahin chahti hoon main, happy now go"
" Love you"
" Ye sab pati ke liye rakh apne, zaroorat hai usse thodi, subah se khadoos mode main hain, mere par kya pyaar barsa rahi hai"
" Maa, kuch bhi"
" Acha, khud baat kar ke dekh le"
" Nhi baad main, I am getting late, Bye chalo"
It felt nice talking to her, better all of a sudden, actually Sidharth was so right, I took this decision in a haste, maine project study bhi nhi kiya because I was so bent on staying away from him that I did what I wanted. I clicked upon my phone to see 5 missed calls of Maa, 3 of Vikram and 7 text messages from Sidharth.
This is definitely a change!
-Shehnaaz uth jaaye tab call kar lena.
- Vikram will stay in the hotel next to Shalini's house, by chance Shalini ke ghar par uncomfortable ho toh just let me know alright.
- over exhaust mat hona
- Shalini would bring the juice, just the way you like before you have your breakfast, have it.
- I know bina nahaye nhi piyegi, but please le lena, pura khatam hona chaiye kyunki baaki ka 1/4 peene ke liye main nhi hoon udhar.
- sorry agar upar wale message ke liye bura lage toh. I know raat ko rokar soyi hogi toh sar dard karega, ab coffee toh nhi legi isliye juice le lena, energy aayegi.
- I might miss your call so please dont think gussa hoon, because for a change nhi hoon. Also, Morning sickness honi toh nhi chaiye owing it's just starting of 4 week but still considering how weak you are, possible hai so nausea, vomiting ho sakta hai, might be slight feverish too, zyada takleef ho toh let me know.
I gulped the remaining juice down, I miss him, I picked up the phone to call him but was met by a call from Vikram.
" Haan Vikram "
" Mam aap ready ho, should I send the car"
" Nhi abhi nhi, it would take half hour I guess, hope so there's no issue"
" Nhi it's alright"
*
"Shalini Di, sorry late ho gayi na, I will help you in the Evening pakka, aur kal se jaldi uth jaungi" I spoke hugging her sideways.
" Arey nhi baba it's fine, vaise bhi bore hi hoti hoon ghar par aajkal, Anaisha is 3 now, I could join back my job but I wanted to be with her till she starts her school and Rishab subah 7 baje hi chale jaate hai, in fact I am happy thoda busy rehne ko mila"
" Kya banaya hai"
" Tere liye Oats, Sidharth said something about your diet, Khayegi ya kuch air banau"
" Nhi nhi it's fine "
" Pakka, I mean I am not sure tu ye boring sa breakfast"
" Haan Bus aise hi I love oats vaise, tasty hote hai, aapko pata hai Sidharth ko kitchen main jaane se itni nafrat hai na, still he makes these oats for me" She smiled fondly remembering all those incidents.
" You love him a lot na "
" Bahut" She didn't even take a second to reply but then realised what was she tricked into.
" Di yaar"
"What pati hai tera, jataya kar haq ache se"
"Still"
"Acha sorry but couldn't control my happiness na baba"
" It's alright, I will see you at the evening, Anaisha kahan hai"
" She's sleeping, puri raat jaagti hai, she sleeps by 4 in the morning, uthegi abhi around 11 "
" Oh okay, take care "
" You too baba, dhyaan rakh"
" Shehnaaz perfect! You have given all the shots in a single take, amazing " It was 3 in the evening when they have shot all the major portions of the shoot.
" I need a break" She spoke tired from the continuous shots she has given. Although acting is what she uses as a distraction when she is upset, angry but still a distraction is a distraction, isn't something which would provide her enough to keep going through out.
"Sure, we have enough days I guess aaj ke liye pack up rakhte hai, same time tomorrow" The director shouted.
" No I mean why pack up! It's just 3 right" She retorted.
" Shehnaaz you don't seem fine, rest and we will resume tomorrow, what's the hurry"
" I guess I am Fine Sir, it's just the continuous shots have exhausted me, moreover I feel most of the part is covered, we have a few sequences and some dialogues left, why to extend it to three when it can be completed in two days "
"Exhaustive for everyone Shehnaaz, but I feel you are right, so let's do one thing, Three hours break , we will shoot the night scene today then the remaining tomorrow in the evening, hope it's fine for everyone! "
" Yeah"
*
" Vikram you can go back! I will stay back in the vanity, not feeling like to travel! "
" Mam but Sir has asked not to leave you alone"
" Kaam mere liye karte ho ya apne sir ke liye" She asked chuckling slightly, Sidharth and his unique ways of the care, yahan hai bhi nahi but still wants everything to go according to him, she was missing him more with the time passing but she was still angry, he didn't had the right to take decisions on her behalf alright. Or maybe he has but her family especially her parents is a very sensitive topic for her, not that she hates her parents, how could she, they are the soul reason of her existence but she isn't font of talking with them either, this was how she was always been until she met him.
He actually doesn't take your decisions or else you might not be present here, as an impulsive decision, her heart countered.
" Sir cares enough for you Ma'am, so even if I am with him, I guess you should still be happy "
" Saala sabko gyaan dena hai! " She muttered.
" Kuch bola aapne " .
" Nhi, abhi tum jao, thodi der tak aa jana, rest chaiye tumhe Vikram, aaj hi travel karke aaye ho, body needs rest alright"
" Fine, aapka lunch yahan rakha hai, kuch aur chaiye hoga toh please let me know"
" Ye bhi aapke Sir ne bola hai"
" Umm Haan Sorry "
" It's fine, chalo jao bhi ab" She spoke laughing.
*
"Kitna kharab hai ek call bhi nhi kar sakta, aise toh gussa nhi hoon ka message aaya tha, isse acha toh gussa hi ho leta yaar" Thinking she opened her whatsApp just to see if there is some other message for her but none! No message after those 7. But something struck her eyes was his dp. This is not possible, galti se lagayi hogi, thinking she just stared it.
It was the picture of his 32nd Birthday, his second birthday with her, them both, this was probably taken by Raju Bhaiya if she remembers it correctly, Sidharth has engulfed her in his arms when she was on a verge of possible breakdown because of how the preparations have gone wrong, she was shoved in his chest and hence her face wasn't visible but she knew it's them both. Him in a black kurta and she in a yellow one. The memory still as fresh as it can be.
"Maa", She called.
"Haan Bacha", she replied.
"Voh kuch baat karni hai", she seemed hesitated
"Bol na Bacha, itna kya soch rahi hai, do saalon se toh sab bina soche bol deti hai aaj kya hua", she asked back.
"Sidharth", she mumbled.
"Kya kiya isne, bol tu mujhe, I will see him, zyada ho gaya hai na iska pareshaan karna, bol kya hua iss baar" Maa spoke and she couldn't control the laugh that erupted from her.
"Maa Nhi kuch nhi kiya usne sachi", she spoke pinching the flesh of her neck between two fingers.
" Okay, Good For him" Maa spoke and Shehnaaz smiled at her, wasn't she suppose to tell her that it's alright, if he has done something, pati patni ke beech ki baat hai, aapas main dekho, as thought by most of the people out there , why to point on someone else when her parents too spoke something similar on the time of her bidaai, but did she mind it no, never she has lived 23 of her life with those thoughts but Maa was different, so different that she wondered at times is she worth this love?
" Kya hua kahan kho gayi"
" Nhi kuch nhi, toh main kya keh rahi thi, Sidharth ka b'day hai na do din baad, kuch socha hai aapne "
" Haan Bacha, he doesn't likes celebrating his birthday as such na, dekha toh hoga tune last year, just family na, Shalini and few of his friends, toh bas ek get together uski favorite kheer would work for him"
" Haan toh maa all that needs preparation too nahi, aise apne aap kaise hoga aur maine kuch socha hai"
" Kya socha hai tune"
"Kuch khaas nhi hai, I don't know if you feel this fine or not, vahan I mean mumma papa sabke b'day par navgrah ki puja karwate the, zyada nhi pta but unhi sab se suna hai, ek baar saal main karwa leni chaiye, shaanti type kuch hota hai"
" Hota tha humare yahan jab Montu chota tha, abhi kafi saal se nhi hua " Montu as I got to know in these two years, his nickname confined to Maa and his friends, Shalini, Ritvik, Naman and one more I don't remember the name, though very rarely but they do call him that.
" Maa sach hai ya nhi pta nhi, but this puja was the only thing that held me back to stay there, aise kuch alag feel hota hai na ekdum, everything so pure, fresh type"
" I know bacha, chal theek hai tera itna man hai toh main baat karti hoon pandit ji se, vaise bhi it's been quite long we have not conducted anything of such sort at our home"
" Raju bhaiya sab ho gaya na " Shehnaaz asked 6 in the morning, the navgrah ki puja was supposed to be performed at 8 in the morning, so she decided to check everything before she wakes him up, also not to forget no idea how will he react to this as in these 1 year 10 months 29 days to be exact she has known that her husband though not an atheist is not an firm believer too.
" Ji Bhabhi Puja ka sab ho gaya, Aapko check karna hai"
" Nhi nhi theek hai, Maa kahan hai"
" Vahan Kitchen main"
" Shehnaaz andar jaa kar utha na bache use, Pata hai gussa karega ek Sunday milta hai usse but zaroori hai 7 bajne wale hai, kab uthega kab taiyaar hoga"
" Utha dungi ek second aap suno, jaake rest karlo, ye khane ka mein dekh lungi, aap jaake baitho udar"
" Shehnaaz kafi kaam hai bacha"
" Ho jaayega, Aditi bhi hai na, we will see aap rest karo, Sidharth gussa karega phir raat ko, pair soojh kar bhatura ban jaayega jab aapka"
" Acha baba theek, pehle sun aloo ki sabji almost ready hai , kheer bhi ban gayi hai you just have to knead the dough for bhatura alright, kuch aur karne ki zarurat nhi hai, dahi use karlena instead of water, aadha aata aadha maida, heavy nhi hoga, also do ghante lagenge for that to make phule hue bhature's toh abhi bana do "
" Haan okay"
She was about to knead the dough but Adi called her outside.
" Bhabhi Voh Anaisha is not well na, toh Shalini Di shaam ko aayengi aur Bhaiyu ke baaki Friends ka call aaya tha they would be here anytime and sabko bol diya hai Bhaiyu ko kuch nhi bolne ka"
" Great main tere bhaiya ko utha deti hoon, Tu baaki ka kaam dekh le"
" Sidharth! " I called him sitting besides him on the bed, ruffling his hairs, although I have been doing this daily from almost 2 years now yet this feels surreal, I mean even after the physical intimacy being there for a good amount of time between us, it's still difficult to ignore this handsome of a man all reserved for me, the feelings actually taking a toll now when I actually know I have fallen badly for my husband, well nothing wrong but I can't bring it in myself to accept this, does he feel the same too, well for some other time to ponder over.
"Sidharth get up baba, 7 baje gaye hai"
"Sunday hai darling, kab utha hoon aaj tak Sunday ko itni jaldi, Tu bhi soja" He spoke pulling me over him and I gasped. Okay nothing new again but yet so wrong, is this right without feelings involved, no idea but it doesn't seems so, I mean this is allowed between husband and wife.
" Bhabhi" I could hear Adi coming this way and I gasped the door wasn't locked.
" Fuck! Sidharth chodo " I mumbled trying to get out of his hold but he just tightened it
" Sidharth " I called him again.
" Kya hai yaar " He groaned and rotated out r position such that I was under him in an instant, he snuggled his face in my chest, I could feel his deep breathing and his hands sliding under my kurta. I always loved wearing them. They give me that homely vibes.
I could hear Adi coming closer to our room, I need to wake him up, she just couldn't see us like this.
Sorry but this is the only option I have.
" I'm pregnant Sidharth " She spoke in his ears and he woke up with a start.
" What the fuck! " He swore under his breathe and be it a normal situation I would have laughed, laughed till my stomach would have ached on his reaction but right now the situation was different. I just got up from the bed
" Bhabhi... Oh bhaiyu aap uth gaye, chalo acha hai, jaldi ready hokar bahar aa jao, Bhabhi voh main ye bolne aayi thi Maa bahar bula rahi hai because sab aa gaye and.... "
" And? " I asked raising my brow.
" And please lock the door from next time" She spoke laughing and was went before any of us could react. I am telling, Aditi is a storm, a pleasant one though! Fuck could storm be pleasant! No I guess not but she is.
" Fucking Embarrassing " I swore under my breathe and he nodded before a smirk replaced the previous expressions on his face.
" What" I asked raising a brow, my husband is no less alright, he could be worse than Aditi at times.
" So what did you just said" He asked with a lopsided grin covering his features... He looked hot... Freaking hot if such term exists.
" What" I asked confused.
" Is it yaad dilaun, aur better I should make it the reality no" He spoke and before I could process I was under him again!
" Sidharth " I gasped.
" Don't play these pranks the next time" He spoke and took the flesh of my nape in between his teeths, sinking them slightly and then lapping at the same for a couple of minutes, converting it in a hickey! I will actually go insane, our first hickey. No I'm not mad alright, but this feels surreal , I couldn't help it, but before I could loose my self in the moment I remembered we have a proper puja arranged outside and here....
Ram! Ram! Ok no this is so not me but something I am taught from childhood again, something my parents gave me, a thought actually no gande kaam when you have to do something dharmik the next moment.
" Mat kijiye " I whispered because that was what I could do, I was so lost in the moment.
" Huh" He asked.
" Mat kijiye Sidharth, bahut log hai bahar, room... Room abhi bhi locked nhi hai" I whispered again.
" Bahut Log Maa and Aditi na probably, chalega " He spoke his hands awakening the desires in me.
" Siddharthhh " I didn't intended but a moan rolled out of my lips when he took flesh in his mouth once, probably creating one more of that thing.
" Please" I moaned again and he rolled off me.
" I'm telling such a mood killer you are" He complained and I laughed.
" Jaaiye naha kar aaiye " I spoke getting up and taking out a cream coloured kurta for him, my husband loves wearing Kurta with jeans and I swear I could go gaga over him anytime but still he is mostly dressed in a formal shirt and a jeans with a white overcoat and stethoscope in one the pockets, this is how you could find him most of the times, but the little time he wore these kurta, I could find everyone in the society oogle over what's mine, okay I already accepted right, he is mine about me ask him I am not sure. I don't even want to enter that lane, I'm happy with these little moments of us, making our own world, I am happy with him being silent as long as that don't kill me from, inside.
" Subah subah kyun nahana hai yaar Sunday ko, I need breakfast, chalo jaldi I will come after brushing my teeth, bahut achi khusbu aa rahi hai, kheer banai hai right" He asked with his eyes reflecting happiness, okay so he was a child as well, especially for kheer.
" Haan banai hai, but abhi nhi milegi, aur Sunday ko bhi nahana padega voh bhi subah subah" I spoke handling him his clothes and a towel..
" Yaar Shehnaaz it's just 7:30 " He spoke and I gasped. Itna time kab ho gaya.
" Sidharth jaaiye aaj ka din kharab mat kijiye, no jhagda allowed" I spoke.
" Aaj kya special hai be" He spoke.
" Hain kuch! Jaiye bhi, mere pass time nhi hai" I spoke eying him for a moment, how could someone forget his own birthday, I mean he remembered our anniversary last year, Maa' s birthday to how could he forget his own.
" Acha theek hai, going but is jeans ke saath this cream kurta doesn't go" He spoke.
" You are not serious haina, Dark blue doesn't go with cream then with what it goes, black"
" Exactly! Pehle hi dimaag chala liya kar darling, kham kha merse bulwati hai"
" No black Sidharth "
" Why, it's either I'm wearing that black kurta Or I'm not going to have a bath right now"
" Ye kaisi zidd hai"
" Aisi hi, deal with it, choice tumhari hai"
" Sidharth puja hai baba, kala nhi pehn te, ashubh hota hai" I spoke, okay this too was what was taught me from childhood, a tale for some other time.
" Pehle toh ye shubh ashubh hota nhi hai, matlab listen yourself for once, logic hai isme koi, colours main bhi discrimination bhencho, pink, purple pehno toh sahi, kala safed toh galat, matlab tuk hai koi iss bat ka"
I was about to say something but was stopped by him again
" Ruko abhi, aur kaheki puja, kisne plan kiya, kab kiya , I'm not, attending anything of such sort alright, I just don't understand how do you even believe in all this"
" Shshsh kitna bologe, theek hai wear whatever you want to, nhi rok rahi, but please puja par no comments alright, baad main sab bata dungi sachi, abhi please, I don't know if I have this right or not, but mere liye bahar aa jana, if not I won't force I promise "
*
" Hi Bhabhi" Naman spoke and rest of His friends followed.
" Hi Kaise ho aap sab, akele aaye ho, Priya, Nandani aur Divya ko bhi lekar aana tha " I spoke back politely.
" Divya toh available nhi hai bhabhi, what I meant was Ghar gai hai apne, aayegi thode dino tak" Naman Spoke.
" Nandani Shalini ke saath aayegi shaam ko" Abhijeet spoke, well the one I forget the name so often
" Well Priya is such a mood nowadays na, main apni thodi der ki azaadi kaise jaane doon " Ritvik spoke joking and all others laughed agreeing.
" You know what I am just gonna call her and let her know her husband is fed up of her" Sidharth spoke coming out of the room, dressed up in the black kurta, faded jeans, and hairs well properly gelled up to a side. Perfect.
" Abe e kyun ghar se nikalwana chahta hai" Ritvik spoke again.
" Actually right Sid! Sab Shehnaaz Bhabhi nhi hote na " Naman added.
" Abe e Bhabhi sounds so formal " Sidharth cringed.
" Toh kya Sana bulaye" Abhijeet joked.
" Bilkul teri biwi ko tere college ke kisse batane padenge lagta hai" Sidharth spoke and I looked at him with wide eyes, a limited number of times one could find him such, actually other than Maa and Aditi, Only these four can bring out this Sidharth out, The reason only these four people from his side knows about me being his wife, others know he is married but he has never introduced me to them, they still are unknown to the image of his wife.
" Oh acha you guess Tu bach jaayega, kon kon thi Sidharth I don't even have a count" Abhijeet countered.
" Abe saale mere ghar main hai tu"
"Dhamki kisko de raha he be "
" Tereko" And the conversation flew so easily, Adi was additional add up to this group, all so closely knitted together.
" Vaise Sidharth I must say, all, changed Haan, Kurta, Puja, itna change main toh Myra ke time bhi nhi aaya tha tujhme " One of them joked and for a second I thought his eyes filled with Pain but the next second he was normal.
" She is not Myra na, biwi hai I guess utna kafi hai" He spoke and I wondered who Myra was, probably the first time I heard her name.
" Biwi hai toh chod kar bhi nhi jaayegi, kyun" Another remark and he fell silent.
" Chod kar toh voh bhi nhi gayi thi, destiny it was, but I guess biwi hai, koi khilona nhi, jisko maa ne laake diya and I like a ziddi bacha would bound her to myself, she is an individual before my wife and I guess that's her right to leave if she wants, who am I to bound her to something."
" Sidharth " Okay so this made me emotional.
" Mazak kar rahe the bhabhi, sorry emotional kar diya na "
" Bacho enough now, Sidharth chal get up, time for the puja"
" Ye puja ho toh rahi hai, itne log bhi hai koi ye bhi bata do occasion kya hai bhai"
" Don't tell me Sidharth you don't remember "
" Nhi not as if it's my birthday and I forgot" He spoke and all of us shook our head at him.
" Oh freak is it! " And the realisation dawned upon him.
" Oh tabhi main sochoon kheer kis khushi main bani hai".
" As if you don't get anything to eat otherwise" Maa spoke.
*
" Maa I will make bhature, Aap sab log baithiye, Aditi chal help me out" She spoke after the puja was over , As said to believe it actually gave me peace, positive energy as I say many of the times. As a change Sidharth was attentive in the puja too, no not because he suddenly had a faith in all these but because it was not the usual cliche puja according to him, something I fail to understand, a puja is a puja, but for him it didn't had those aarti and puja of mitti ki murti's as he says and was a more scientific one as he believed in the existence of surya (sun), chandrama (moon), mangal ( Mars) , budh (Mercury), brahspati (Jupiter) , shukr (venus), shani (saturn), rahu and ketu but not in their apparent roles of the same grahs in the life of one.
"Haan chalo, sabse pehle kheer bhi khaungi"
" Adi Tu baith I will help her" Sidharth spoke getting up and everyone was surprised.
" Tum meri help karoge" I asked shocked and it was not even hidden.
" Abe Saale you are behaving as a Ranjha you know, ek minute biwi se door nhi raha jaa raha" Abhijeet teased and Shehnaaz felt her cheeks burning, she has to look down from saving herself from the embarrassment, why not there was nothing romantic enough between them, alright a correction nothing except the intimacy they shared.
" Tu chup kar be, Shaadi ke agle hi din wasn't you the one jisko biwi ke alawa kuch dikhta bhi nhi tha" Sidharth retorted.
" Rare chance Sana, you should not let it go, Adi Tu baith jaa" Maa spoke diffusing their conversation which could go from one to the next level she knew and I smiled.
" Maa yaar, aur tum chal rahi ho ya main baith jaaon, limited offer kitni der ke liye valid hai nhi pta" He spoke and I nodded.
Thank you, he whispered pulling me in his arms once we were in the kitchen and I was surprised but soon it turned in shock when I saw the flour in the utensil, dahi kept beside it and I realised I messed it up.
Sidharth Chodiye, I whispered unable to contain my emotions.
"Shehnaaz roh kyun rahi hai meri jaan, kuch kiya kya maine, bahar jaaon, Adi hi chaiye thi toh bol deti rone ka kya hai, haan meri jaan", he spoke so softly that I just couldn't contain it anymore.
"I wanted everything perfect Sidharth, aur ye"
"Kya ho gaya, sab kitne ache se toh hua bahar, what's wrong" He asked tensed.
" Main bhool gayi, bhature kaise banau"
" Are you serious iske liye kya toh rahi hai be, belloying it on the chakla, phir tal de kadhai main isme rone ka kya hai "
" What's belloying kuch bhi, anyways kisko bellon, aata hi ghundna bhool gayi, itni jaldi kaise hoga sab" I spoke.
" Sorry meri vajah se aapka birthday kharb ho gaya, hatiye main kuch karti hoon" She spoke trying to get out of his hold
" Stop crying baba, kuch kharab nhi hua, Raju bhaiya will help you, aur bhature kyun banane hai, make simple Paranthe na baba, aalo bane hai na, they go well too aur kheer toh hai hi, stop stressing"
"Raju Bhaiya! " He called out.
" Lekin... "
"Shshsh kuch lekin nhi" He spoke pulling me again towards him and I snuggled in him, no nothing romantic but just as a assurance he is there even when I am wrong probably, calming me down like a partner, perfect or not doesn't matter anymore.
" Kya bolte hai English main haan Perfect, Nazar na lage kisi ki" Raju Bhaiya spoke and we both broke apart.
" Kya perfect" He spoke and I turned around wiping my face and a few tears that trickled down.
" This photo " He showed.
This photo actually holds a special memory for her and him actually using this as his dp though not even a thing to consider yet she was happy, he is trying, no she doesn't want him to change, she is happy in him being the way he is but sometimes these gestures just calm your otherwise marathon running heart, necessary right, some changes from both the sides to keep it going, just a like a heartbeat, no fights, no changes life is boring, it has to have it's own twists and turns what's the fun otherwise.
*
" You need to perform on Ranjha Shehnaaz, the same steps you practiced with Jerry Sandhu" The choreographer spoke once I was done with other shots, Jerry her co-actor from this mv, the one she has been linked up various times in the past too.
" Ranjha from Shershaah " I confirmed, such an emotional song it was, no not that I had a problem but something stirs in the heart listening to this particular song, like a string just pulled specially when I feel I am missing everyone so terribly, actually the mv was planned such, a life of a struggling dancer who falls effortlessly in love with someone and tries coping up when an incident changes everything with her dance.
" Umm okay"
Roothi Ae Sabte Rabba
Rabba Dil Bhi Hai Rootha
Sab Kuchh Hai Bikhra Bikhra
Bikhra Sa Rootha Rootha
Chup Maahi Chup Hai Ranjha
Bole Kaise Ve Na Ja
Bole Kaise Ve Na Ja
Aaja Aaja
Bole Kaise Ve Na Ja
Bole Kaise Ve Na Ja
Chup Maahi Chup Hai Ranjha
Aaja Aaja
The lifts she was supposed to perform had whole of her heart, she was tired yes she was but the power the song held on her was something she was amazed too. She never thought a song could touch her so deeply. The flairs of dress falling all around when she swirled around and Jerry performing his part perfectly too, she was sure this segment of the mv would be the most perfect one.
It's 7 in the evening still there is not even a single call from her side, he thought, he was sitting in their room, for a change, early from hospital, reason he knew it has to be her, Maa has told about her feeling unwell in the morning and the reason he has been distracted from everything and he couldn't let his patients suffer because he was not in a right state of mind.
" Fuck it, I need to talk to her" He thought and dialled without any other thought.
" Hello" She spoke and he thought this is it, this not even 19 hours of their distance and he is missing her probably because this was the first time they were separated because of a fight. Yes she was there on shoots most of the times, even out of their home for weeks, months too but they never fought before she went, never in these four years, this was the first one.
A fight! Was it actually a fight, he thought, it was not even close to a fight they had, yes they had enough shares of arguments in their married life, a old proverb in hindi stating,
" Jahan do bartan honge voh khadkenge bhi "
Wasn't the same with life as well, two people with, different opinions are tend to fight right, he was not so concerned what changed, he didn't wanted to ponder because his heart knew he knows and his brain was not accepting, call it his failure but he needs time to be vocal about many things.
But was it just because he thought about making Her meet her parents, probably not, it was much more he knew, dealing with brains and the underlying mindset is his passion and his wife he knew something triggered her, was that the child remark, maybe yes because she reacted only after that, but he needs to know what exactly happened and that could be possible only if they talk, a healthy communication was lacking he knew and he really needs to mend ways, only if he had stayed there atleast for today but these if's had no value when they both were impulsive, why to blame her when he was at equal fault.
" Sidharth you there" She spoke breaking his chain of thoughts.
" Yeah, Kaisi hai"
" Formal zyada ho rahe hai aap" She spoke and he went silent.
" I miss you" She spoke with a hope, what else could she pray for because she knew her husband well enough to know he was not the one to believe in words yet here she was hopping, for once him to repeat only these exact words, nothing more she wants.
" Same here" He whispered and she had that widest grin on her face as if getting everything in a moment.
" Kaisa tha aaj ka din" He decided to change the topic.
" Bahut acha Sidharth, pata hai... " And she continued everything could wait, their fight their anger every damn thing she thought because for them to continue that they need to be present face to face not on phones sitting 1653 km away from each other . The anger was still there, the resentment still persistent, the fight still not forgotten but what mattered was they had a hope to rely upon, they both were together and would eventually solve it a day she knew, her heart knew.
" Vaise Sidharth " She decided to tease him a little, very little time one could actually pull the legs of Dr. Singhal she has learnt.
" Hmm" He hummed leaning on their balcony gazing at the moon.
" Aapne Heer Ranjha dekhi thi kya "
" Main movies nhi dekhta Shehnaaz! "
" Jhoote Meri toh dekhi thi last month voh bhi theatre main jaakar, Maa ke saath"
" Abey yaar"
" Acha acha theek hai, phone mat rakhna, bas ek doubt, dp achanak se kaise badal gayi, zyada hi yaad aa gayi"
" Aisa... Aisa nhi hai alright, phone main dikhi toh laga di" He spoke rubbing his nape, quite obvious na, dikhi aur laga di ye toh scene hi nhi tha, he has legit searched it, because in every other picture her face was as clear as a crystal, this had a special place in his heart and her face was also hidden, a perfect choice he thought.
" Acha ji"
" Haan ji, now stop irritating me, main rakh raha hoon"
" Acha acha theek hai na yaar " She whined.
I have no idea how is it.
Sorry if it doesn't makes sense at all but I guess it does.
Hoping you all liked it.
No questions I'm asking today, you all are free to comment anything you feel is wrong, is not going according to the track and even the things you liked (happy wala emoji)
Also did you liked the past that was in between or do you not want me to add anything of the past because that, won't make sense I guess, 4 years of their married life is what makes the essence of their present situation.
I hope you liked it and the part was worth a read.
Thanking you
Aaradhya
♥️