"Last week on Total Drama Action...our competitors took it on the chin as they faced an all you can eat buffet of deadly natural disasters!"
"But it was Owen's own feat that tripped him up. Ouch!! Owen's broken jaw means he can't eat anything till it's the business end of a blender. Yep. It's a rough life for Owen."
"Luckily we had a submarine tank simulator full of water to get our contestants' minds off Owen's well being and worry about their own. It really had everyone gasping for air!"
"Sound tough? Get used to it, because this week it's all-out war!"
"It's a desperate battle for survival on..."
TOTAL
DRAMA
ACTION
You all make your way to the part of the lot where Chris and Chef await in military esc clothing. Chef, wearing his Master Cheif uniform and Chris wearing a general's hat. "Today is all about war movies, so, look lively, you--"
"BUCKETS OF HORSE CRAP!!" Chef intervenes.
"So, get ready for the first death defying challenge, you--"
"DISGUSTING, SLIMY, CRUSTACEANS!!"
"Move it, Privates! Fall in!"
"SIR, YES SIR!!" you all yell.
"I always wanted to be a marine. They're rough, tough, they wear rad boots, and they say hoo-ah! No clue what that means, but, it's just sounds so cool! Hoo-ah!"
*Confessional*
"Ninja training was somewhat like the marines. I didn't get to go to a monk's temple, but, they're training was very similar on terms of conditioning. So, this should be easy.....hopefully!"
Harold is excited, claiming that his experience with playing war video games with other people will help the team win, mainly with teamwork. Duncan, of course, dismisses this, telling the team how he's the only one who knows what they're doing. "You won't be saying that when I bust out my deadly numyo! No longer must we live in fear of ninja attacks, not when I'm carrying this bad boy!" He takes out what seems to be a double sided yo-yo, with some Japanese engraving on each side. He starts twirling the numyo at a fast pace, trying to show off his skills, until Duncan picks up a twig, walks over, and sticks it in between the string, causing the numyo to be caught, wrapping around Harold violently fast, as well as hitting him in the nuts. "My nether regions..!!" Duncan laughs at his pain. "Harold just took a numyo to the numyos!"
Later...
You all have been led to an unknown location with blindfolds on. Wherever you're sitting at, it's loud. Chris tells you to take your blindfolds off and you seem to all be in a plane. "When it comes to making a war movie, jumping out an airplane is the most dangerous stunt there is." Chris opens up a crate full of parachutes and the hatch to the plane, revealing the sky. "SO NATURALLY, ITS OUR FIRST CHALLENGE!!" he yells, competing with the noise of the wind.
*Confessional*
"This actually shouldn't be that bad. I mean, we all dove off of that cliff last season. We're not as high, and we have parachutes. How bad can it be?"
"If we live, I was thinking I should totally be our team's admiral!" Lindsay says. "Admirals are in charge of sailors! Generals are on charge of soldiers!" Beth corrects her. "But, admiral sounds cuter! So now I'd like to be called Admiral Lindsay, Her Hotness, okay?"
"Um...I thought I was the leader of this team!!" You try telling her. "To be fair, she did do a pretty good job leading us in the horror movie challenge!!" Beth responds in her friend's defense. You look down at the floor with no response.
Chris announces the drop zone is approaching and it's time to line up. "Stunt people undergo weeks of training before they parachute, luckily, we're gonna skip all that and get to the good part, jumping!!" Harold is concerned, but Chris, as usual, isn't. "What's the worst that could happen?!"
"We die?!" Owen blurts out. "I know! Hilarious!!" Chris laughs. Izzy tries to push Owen off the plane with her, but he's not agreeable, not even having a parachute lesson ever in his life. Chris assures him by saying the team just told him that there were no parachutes in WW1, so he pushes them out the door. Izzy, sprints out the door, telling you to tell her pet rock she loves her. "Okay, starting to panic here!!" you yell. Chris tells Owen he's next, but he's still not agreeable, so, he pulls out a corn beef blendie drink and tosses it out the door. "Fetch, boy!!" Owen chases after it, his weight leaving the plane shifts the balance of the vehicle, causing everyone but Chris to slide out the door, screaming. You land on what feels to be pretty soft and squishy. You look around and see that you only fell a few feet from a fake plane surrounded by a fake background of the sky, two giant fans in front of you, managed by Chef, onto a giant mattress. While Owen cheers to be alive and the rest of you groan, Chris tells you all to get moving for the next challenge.
Later...
Chris presents both teams with a pile of explosives. While Izzy goes nuts, getting as many in her hands as possible, Chris explains that the teams have to make a controlled yet creative explosion of paint with the half of the camp that they have, complete with fake buildings and bushes. Duncan immediately takes charge, already taking a handful of specific explosions. Harold tries to ally himself with Duncan with applying his chemistry knowledge, but Duncan dismisses him. "I think we might have to stick with Duncan, honey" Leshawna tells him. "Why?!" Harold asks. "Vandal boy beats big chem nerd" Heather tells him. It's a simple equation."
Later...
"Gaphers, are we ready?!" Chris asks. "Time for a little punk rock!" Duncan exclaims, setting off the explosives. The paint flies all over the place as you watch through a protective glass sheild. The paint settles into the shape of a giant skull, a classic Duncan trademark.
Harold tells him he did well, offering a handshake. "Yeah, no shit! This is my world you're living in, dork boy!" He pokes Harold hard in the chest before walking off. Harold growls angrily, clenching his shirt.
"Are we ready to blow it up?!" Chris asks. Explosivo counts down in spanish before setting off the explosives. "Boom boom!!" Everyone plugs their ears, but nothing happens. "Well folks, looks like we're having some technica--" Just then, the explosives all go off at once, shattering the glass sheild, covering everyone in paint, and leaving a massive steaming hole in the ground. "Explosivo is one crazy hombre!" Izzy laughs. "Explosive? Yes. Creative and controlled? Not so much!" Chris says, irritated. He walks over to your team, claiming thr Gaphers the victor of the challenge, giving the prize of the Big Trunk of Mind-Blowing Secrets. Chef brings over a red treasure chest with golden edges and two rods on each side to carry it. "You'll Be defending it with your very lifes when we return to more Total! Drama! Action! "You just went to commercial to get the paint out, didn't you?" you ask. "Yes, Y/N. Yes I did. This hair cannot afford to have unknown chemicals such as paint in it for too long!"
Later...
It's soon time to start the next challenge. The Gaphers must protect the trunk, while the Grips must try to steal it. A bit like Capture the Flag. Whoever wins will gain immunity from tonight's vote and a peak inside the trunk.
Later...
Admiral Lindsay sees the Gaphers digging a hole through her binoculars from afar. "I recommend we attack immediately" Beth says firmly. "Team, Admiral Lindsay Her Hottness says it's time we attack!" Lindsay says, punching her fist into the air. Izzy asks Admiral Lindsay to offer a suggestion from Explosivo. "He says, we should make a Trojan taco!" Lindsay beams. "Ooh! I love Mexican food!!" Izzy explains the plan of making a 5 kilometer wide taco shell with beans, meat, and cheese. "And jalapenos? I like it spicy!" Lindsay asks, pronouncing the pepper wrong. "¡Si! Muy muy caliente!" Izzy says with a smile. She goes on to explain that the salsa will instead be TNT. "We bring the Trojan taco to their camp, they take a tasty bite, and then...BOOM BOOM!!"
A moment of silence falls upon you all as Izzy looks around and slowly realizes no one is down for her plan. "People, Admiral Lindsay Her Hottness decrees that, although Mexican food is very tasty, we will not be making the Trojan taco. We are going to attack! So...let's go down there and fight!" You all, not feeling the drive to attack. "Now, listen, peeps, I know you're frightened going into battle, but, I'm here to say, be strong! Be fierce! Be ferocious! Go and fight for that trunk like it's boxing day and you're fighting for the cutest pair of yoga pants! Show! No! Mercy!!!" Each of you, now hyped up, charge down the valley to take the trunk. "I'll be here when you're done!" Lindsay calls, staying in her chair.
Later...
You make it down to the valley, but don't seem to find the Gaphers. "Where are they?" Beth asks. "I just saw them!" After searching for the Gaphers for a while, you seem to give up and walk away. Suddenly, you start to hear what sound like very loud farts. You turn around to see Harold climbing out of a hole, gasping for air. "Found them!" you yell, getting your team to charge, only to be caught in a net that springs you up into the air, holding them by a cable. Duncan suddenly swings down out of nowhere and cuts it with his knife, sending you flying all the way back to Lindsay.
"See, this is why I should be leading" you exclaim. "We didn't have a clear plan and simply just ran into a trap!" Lindsay pouts at your rebuttal. "Fine! Admiral Lindsay Her Hottness will let you come up with your own plan!"
Later...
Duncan searching the perimeter, sook turns around and sees you and Izzy running towards him. You both start messing with him by engaging in hand to hand "combat". Duncan throws as many punches as he can, but, you and Izzy only dodge while occasionally pushing or shoving him down. This is all part of the plan as the Agile Squad distracts Duncan while the Strong Squad (Beth and Owen) sneak into the base to grab the trunk. For some reason, they seem to be taking a while to get it. You soon take your vision off of Duncan for a second, giving him the chance to knock you out and Izzy not too long after. Turns out Beth and Owen didn't take in account that Leshawna would be stinking up the base with her farts, thanks to that smoothie meant for Owen.
Pretty soon you all come to and Chris lets you know that your team lost. Lindsay looks at you, still pouting. "Well, well, well. Guess your plan didn't work either." You scowl at her. "Neither did yours! At least we got close!" You both continue to argue, resulting in the two of you walking away in silent anger.
Night Time...
Chris addresses the flaws of the players from today, asking Lindsay if she's nervous of going home. "Let's face it, Chris. It was my lousy admiraling that cost us the challenge. If I go home, tonight, I won't blame anyone...except Y/N."
"Real mature, Lindsay."
Chris also points the finger at Izzy, claiming she overdid the second challenge, costing the team the advantage, asking if she will be going home for the second time. "Explosivo does not answer most questions!" Finally, Chris turns to Owen. "That busted jaw and a full day with no poops didn't really make you that useful today now did it?" Owen groans in pain, not able to respond with any words. Chris is soon given the results. "Tonight, the Gilded Chris goes to Beth, Lindsay, and Y/N!" You look at Izzy, who has a confident smile on her face. "The final award goes to...Owen!" Izzy's smile fades. "¿Por que?" she asks. "I'll miss you, Izzy!" Lindsay says before she's snatched away from Chef and tossed into the Lame-O-Sine. "Well we finally got rid of Little Ms Weird and Werider for the last time...hopefully. Catch you next time on Total! Drama! Action! At ease!"