The air in the field is fresh, smelling of sweet flowers and grass. It's familiar, you've been here before and you instantly remember falling asleep. It's sunny too, the warmth upon your skin calms you as you lay upon the grass.
Turning your head to the person beside you, your face falls slightly, "I'm dreaming."
"Yes," Castiel nods, laying in the same place you remember Dean did - in some distant dream he conjured for you long ago.
"Why?"
"I need to talk to you."
"Why should I listen?" You sigh, admiring how the sun lights up his blue eyes, even in your dream. "Last time I saw you, Dean was half dead."
He wishes he could stay.
"It isn't safe here anywhere else," he admits to you, "someone could be listening to us. Even here, I'm not so sure we can speak to one another."
"What? Who's listening, Cas?" You ask, a sudden fear entering your chest, "What's going on?"
"I can't explain it right now. There's really no time," Castiel places his hand upon your cheek, two fingers against your temple.
You suck a breath in, reaching for him, "Cas."
"Meet me here, Y/N. Please."
"Wait-"
Images of the place flash in your head, and you see a location handwritten on paper. Opening your eyes, you're met with the dark hotel room and a slight ringing in your ears.
"Wake up," you rise to your feet, flicking lights on and beginning to pack your stuff, "Up, now!"
"What? What's going on?" Dean exclaims, standing just the same.
"Castiel needs us."
You walk through the empty warehouse in the middle of the night, utterly on edge despite the gun in your hand and the Winchesters by your side.
"What did he say to you, Y/N?" Sam pipes up, looking around at a whole lot of nothing, "What was so important?"
"He couldn't say," you answer, "he said there was no time." Entering a large room, you all pause in your tracks. "Oh, god."
Sam's lips are parted, he looks around, "It looks like a bomb went off."
"There was a fight here," Dean notes, beginning to walk and scour through the room at the debris, "Angels."
He flashes his torch at the symbols on the wall, drawn in blood.
"That sends them back to heaven," you recall, adding nervously, "maybe Cas got caught in the crossfire."
"So, what? Cas was fighting Angels?" Sam tries the idea on his tongue, it doesn't seem right, "Has he finally gone dark side?"
"No, no," you frown, staring at a corner of the room, "if he's fighting Angels, it's for us."
A groan comes from the rubble and you all spring to action. In the corner, under the rubble, you spot a dirty suit and a hand reaching out for the light.
Dean leans over the man, pulling him up by his arms, "Cas!"
"What's... what's going on?" Castiel looks around, his lashes covered in dust and a deep, confused expression on his face. Dean pulls him to his feet, holding him steady.
"Castiel," you stand in front of him, gesturing to the room around you, "what the hell happened here?"
"Y/N..."
"Yeah, I'm here," you place both hands on his cheeks, trying to hold his weak head upright, "I'm here. Cas?"
He looks around, his face falling with disbelief and panic. "Oh, no. Castiel," he groans, running a hand over his tired face, "I'm not Castiel. It's me."
"What?" You stare at him blankly, unsure of what else to say.
Sam shares a look with Dean, confused, "Who's 'me'?"
"Jimmy," he answers simply, his voice dry and defeated, "I'm Jimmy."
You pull your hands away from his face, stepping back awkwardly. "Cas' vessel?" You add it up, meeting his attentive eyes. Jimmy nods and looks down at himself, brushing the dust off of him.
"Where is he?"
Jimmy looks up at you, a sad and knowing expression on his face as if he's a surgeon about to deliver bad news, "He's gone. Castiel is gone."
Jimmy hums gratefully, his large hands clasped around a big burger. He devours it like a wild animal free from starvation, quick and desperate. There's no elegance to it. It definitely isn't Castiel. You can't help but stare at him, a curious and horrified look on your face.
He catches your eyes, about to take another bite of the burger but he stops, "Do you... do you mind not staring?"
"You mind slowing down?" Dean shoots back from beside you and Sam. You tear your eyes away from Jimmy.
"I'm hungry," Jimmy shoots back obviously, furrowing his eyebrows at the man in front of him.
"What the hell happened back there?" Sam questions him, thinking back to the scene in the warehouse, "It looked like an angel Battle Royale."
Jimmy shakes his head, swallowing a large bite of his meal, "All I remember is a flash of light and I, uh - I woke up and I was just, you know, like, me again."
"So, what?" Dean gestures in frustration, "Cas just ditched out of your meat suit?"
"Or he was cast out of it?" You suggest, giving Dean a look.
"You remember anything about being possessed? Anything at all?"
"Yeah, bits and pieces," he cringes as if he's trying to recall it. He looks to you, "You, I remember. A lot. Cas, uh... he has a fondness for you."
Don't smile. Don't smile. This isn't news, he's just protective and takes care of you. And is so kind and caring. Of course, he's fond of you, you're friends.
"Right." You let out an awkward cough under the pressure of everyone's eyes suddenly on you.
Jimmy continues, "But... I mean, angel inside of you, it's kinda like being chained to a comet."
"Ah, that doesn't sound like much fun," Dean admits.
"Understatement."
"Cas came to me in a dream, said he had to tell me something important. Do you happen to remember what it was?" You ask.
"No," he wears a sad expression, shaking his head, "I'm sorry."
Dean sighs, "Come on, what do you know?"
"My name is Jimmy Novak," he begins, not sounding like Castiel at all despite having his voice, "I'm from Pontiac, Illinois. And... I have a family."
Jimmy frowns, looking at the three of you with an incredulous expression, "The hell are you talking about, I can't go home?"
"We want you to be safe, alright?" You explain, "Who knows who'll be after you."
"There's a good chance you have a bulls-eye on your back," Dean adds.
"What you think the demons will come after me? What do they want with me?"
"You were Cas' vessel, you're important," you sigh dismally, "once word spreads that you're... vacant, I'm sure everyone will be wanting to drill your brain."
"But I don't know anything."
Dean, noticing his frustrated tone, speaks with calm and understanding, "We know that but-"
"Look, I'm done, okay?" Jimmy raises his voice with defeat and exhaustion, "With demons, angels, all of it. I just want to go home."
"We understand-"
"I don't think that you do understand!" Jimmy shouts back, "I've been shot and stabbed and healed, and my body has been dragged all over the Earth. By some miracle, I'm out, and I am done. I've given enough, okay?"
"Look," Sam speaks up, voice friendly and attentive, "all we're saying is that until we figure this out, the safest place is with us."
"How long?" Jimmy questions, knowing his answer when silence falls over the group.
"We'll cross that bridge when we get to it," Sam answers.
"No," Jimmy shakes his head, "I'm going. I'm going to see my wife and daughter, okay?"
You let out a sigh, standing in front of the door, "I know you want to see them, I get it. But Jimmy, you'd only be putting them in danger."
"So, what, now I'm a prisoner?" Jimmy exclaims, standing in front of you.
"Harsh way to put it," Sam shrugs.
You lay in bed, your tired eyes staring at the window outside the bedroom.
"Cas," you whisper, "I don't know where you are but... I hope you can hear me. I hope you're okay. Jimmy's with us. He's alive and he's safe. Come back soon. Please."
"And how, exactly, did he sneak past you again?" You question Sam, your eyes narrowing at him as he tries to explain himself.
"I was getting a Coke," Sam answers, giving you a tired look from the passenger seat, "I said that already."
"Right," you answer, giving Dean a sceptical look.
Dean just stares at the road ahead, biting back a laugh, "Was it a refreshing Coke?"
"Hey, guys."
"Fuck!" You shout, turning to see Anna in the back seat next to Sam, "Anna?"
"What the hell?!" Dean shouts, almost losing control of the steering wheel before setting the car back on its course, "You ever try calling ahead?"
"I like the element of surprise," Anna jokes, giving a shrug - not at all apologetic for almost giving you a heart attack.
Anna turns to Sam, her eyes settling on him for a moment, "Sam... You seem different."
"Me? I don't know," he responds awkwardly, meeting your eyes for a moment before turning back to the Angel with a laugh, "Haircut?"
Anna doesn't laugh back, just gives him a meaningful expression, "That's not what I'm talking about."
Sam doesn't respond, just turns and looks out the window, getting away from her interrogating eyes. "What'd Jimmy tell you? He remember anything?" Anna changes the subject, looking to Dean.
"Why? What's going on?" He asks her.
"It's Cas," she answers, meeting your concerned eyes, "He got sent back home. Well, more like dragged back."
"Dragged back?" You repeat, your eyes wide, "By who?"
"Other Angels, I'm guessing."
"Back to heaven? That's not a good thing?" Dean wonders, setting his eyes back onto the road.
Anna shakes her head, "No. That's a very bad thing. Painfully, awfully bad. He must have seriously pissed someone off."
"He said he had to talk to me about something, he said we had to meet him someplace because people could be listening."
"Heaven..." Anna confirms, "What did he have to tell you?"
"I don't know," you admit to her, sadly, "by the time we got there, he was gone."
"Does Jimmy know?" She asks.
"No."
"He says he doesn't remember," Dean notes uncertainly.
"Whatever it is, it's huge," Anna exclaims, "You gotta find out for sure."
Sam gives her a look, "Yeah. That's why we're going after Jimmy."
"That's why you shouldn't have let him go in the first place. He's probably dead already." She shoots back, giving Sam a look before she disappears.
"Alright, bye," Sam draws out a sigh.
"Oh, Cas," you shake your head in worry, "what the hell happened?"
Dean looks over to you, his expression filled with concern and understanding, "We'll find him. We'll get him back."
You nod, "We have to."
There are shouts heard from the house. You hear it as soon as you open the door to the Impala. Grabbing your gun quickly, you follow Dean. He kicks the door down, weapon at the ready as you all charge in.
You see a woman being thrown back, against the wall. And you rush up to her. "Mrs Novak?" You ask her, seeing her comprehend and nod, "You okay?"
She stutters, watching the scene unfold before her. Dean pulls a knife out, slicing the mans throat. He falls to the ground. The woman stalks over to Dean, but Sam stops her in his tracks. You watch him with wide eyes, as he stretches his hand towards her. Black smoke begins to filter from her mouth. He's exorcising her.
Sam turns to you, "Go. Get them out of here."
It's then that you see Jimmy, holding his young daughter in his arms. Dean rushes up to them, guiding them outside the house. You turn to Mrs Novak, giving her reassuring words as you help her outside with her family.
"Start the car!" Dean orders, running back into the house for Sam.
"Get in," you tell them, catching the keys Dean throws at you. When they stay still, you shoot a serious look at them, "Now!"
Jimmy's family sit in the back of the Impala, chatting amongst themselves quietly. Amelia, no doubt, reassuring her daughter that everything is going to be alright. You lean against the car, next to Dean.
"Another kid learning about shit she's too young to know about," you sigh, crossing your arms over your chest.
Dean hums back in agreement, "At least they're alright. We got there just in time."
"You were right," Jimmy announces, walking up to you and the Winchesters.
Dean gives him a nod, "I'm sorry we were."
"I'm telling you, I don't know anything," Jimmy gives an exasperated sigh, running a hand over his face.
"They don't care," you tell him plainly.
"And I don't think they're inclined to believe you," Dean adds.
"And even if they did, you're a vessel," Sam points out, "They're still gonna wanna know what makes you tick."
You give Jimmy a look, "They're probably thinking Cas is gonna make a return sooner or later."
Sam stands in front of Jimmy, "I'm gonna tell you once again, you're putting your family in danger. You have to come with us."
"How long?" He asks, "And don't give me that 'cross that bridge when we get to it' crap. I want a real answer."
"Don't you get it?" Sam exclaims, a deep scowl on his face, "Forever. The demons will never stop. You can never be with your family."
You shoot him a look, "Sam-"
"No, he needs to hear it!" The younger Winchester continues, "You either get as far away from them as possible or you put a bullet in your head. And that's how you keep your family safe. But there's no getting out and there's no going home."
Dean shoots his brother a look, standing from the Impala, "Well, don't sugarcoat it, Sam."
"I'm just telling him the truth, Dean," he shoots back, turning to give his brother the same scowl, "Someone has to."
Jimmy, a defeated expression on his face, opens the back door of the Impala. His wife gives him a small smile, her daughter asleep in her arms.
"Honesty?" You pout at Sam, seeing him walk over to Mrs Novak's car, "Is that your new policy?"
"I don't have time to argue with you," he responds, popping the hood open.
"I'm not arguing," you state, "I'm asking."
"What, exactly?"
"What did Anna mean when she said you were different?"
"How should I know?" Sam frowns, acting as though he's holding back a laugh - as if it's so comical you'd even ask. "She's an Angel, who knows why she says half the things she does."
The car sparks to life underneath his hands. You drop the subject.
"What the hell happened back there?" Deans tough voice breaks the sound of rain hitting the Impala as you drive.
"What?"
"You practically fainted trying to gank a demon," he addresses, giving Sam a look. He looks out the window of the passenger seat, frustrated.
"I didn't faint," Sam corrects his brother, "I got a little dizzy."
"Well, you can call it whatever you want," Dean answers sarcastically, "Point is, you used to be strong enough to kill Alastair. Now you can't even kill a stunt-demon number three?"
"What do you want me to say about it, Dean?"
"The truth seems like a good place to start," you speak up, watching the boys from the passenger seat. Your voice is low as Jimmy sleeps beside you, eyes closed to the world.
"I'm telling the truth," Sam exclaims, exhausted at the insinuations, "I'm fine!"
"Why doesn't that convince me?" You ask him, meeting his eyes for a moment before he turns back to face the road.
"Look, I'm not trying to pick a fight here, okay? I just... you're scaring me, man," Dean admits, "you mojo is all over the place."
"I'm scaring myself." Sam adds quietly. You're about to speak but his phone interrupts you, making Jimmy stir beside you. "Hello?" Sam asks, "Who is this?"
A look washes over his face and he turns to the back seat, gesturing to Jimmy. "It's for you," Sam turns and holds the phone out, "it's your wife."
Jimmy let's out a tired grunt, his eyes conveying exhaustion beyond anything you've ever seen on Castiel.
Taking the phone from Sam, he holds it up to his ear, "Amelia?"
Then, Jimmy's face falls.
You pile out of the Impala, in front of a large warehouse. The lights are on and you see a silhouette pass quickly. You hear to get in there now. Dean tucks the knife under his belt, turning to the group, "Alright, they're expecting you to come alone. That's exactly what you're gonna do."
"We'll work our way through the catwalks," Sam advises, "we'll be right behind you."
"All you gotta do is stay calm and stall. Let us do our job," Dean gives him a nod.
Jimmy gives him a frightful look, "You want me to stay calm? This is my family we're talking about."
"Jimmy," you address seriously, gun in your hand, "everything's going to be fine. We won't let your family get hurt, okay? You need to trust that we know how to do our job. They're gonna be fine."
Jimmy holds back an eye roll, looking down with defeat, "Yeah, whatever... Give me a minute, guys, okay?" He turns on his heel, walking away from the group. You watch him walk to the warehouse without a second look, taking a deep breathe before he enters.
Sam watches him disappear, "There's no way they're expecting him to come alone. You guys know this is probably a trap."
"Yeah, we know," you answer him, "that's why we have a plan."
"I am alone," Jimmy lies to the demon inhabiting his beloved wife.
"Oh, you're such a liar," she smiles at him, "Like I didn't think you'd bring Heckle and Jeckle, hmm?"
When Jimmy sees Sam and Dean being led into the room, along with demons surrounding them, he knows something is up. You're missing from the equation, and he pretends to dismiss it.
"Nice plan, Dean," Sam spits.
"Yeah, well, nobody bats 1,000." Dean scowls back.
Outside, you look up into the dark night sky. The rain has died down, it's now only misty droplets.
"Please," you mumble, your hands pressed together as you pray, "I'm begging you. We need your help... and there's no other way. Castiel, please do this... for me."
"Got the knife?" Amelia asks her body guards. When one of the demons holds Ruby's knife up, she sneers happily, "You know what's funny? I was actually bummed to get this gig, picking up an empty vessel. Sort of like a milk run. Now look who landed in my lap!"
"Yeah, well, you got us, okay?" Sam gestures, "Let these people go."
"Oh, Sam," she hums wickedly, "It's easy to act chivalrous when your Wonder Girl powers aren't working, huh? Now for the punch line... Everybody dies."
A piercing ringing sounds in your ear, you cover them on instinct. The pain is unbelievable, you almost feel as though you're head is about to explode.
"Cas!" You scream, falling to your knees, "I know it's you!" The pressure in your head continues, you begin to feel dizzy. "Yes, Castiel."
Amelia holds up a gun, pointing it at Jimmy and pulling the trigger. You push the warehouse doors open, drawing attention from all in the room. Jimmy falls to his knees, you turn to look at him.
"No," Amelia mumbles, her eyes fixated on you, "it can't... you're-"
"Let these people go," you speak up, never taking your eyes off Amelia, "I won't say it again."
Amelia turns to one of her demons, giving him a nod. When he marches towards you, all you have fo do is press two fingers to his forehead. He erupts in bright light, exorcised and vanquished. The whole thing flashes before your eyes like images in a photo album, distant and parallel to all you've ever known. It feels like you're dreaming.
Dean, having killed the last of the demons, turns to you. "Y/N?"
You look at him, meeting his horrified eyes, "Not quite."
Jimmy lies on the ground, bleeding, holding his stomach tightly, "Castiel."
"Yes," you answer... or rather, Cas answers.
Sam gets Ruby's knife back from the demon, using it to plunge into her neck. He hovers above her, his eyes dark and filled with longing. Sam leans down, his lips meeting the deep red gash on her. And he drinks, like an animal starved for days in the middle of nowhere. When he turns to his brother, stabbing the demon in the chest, he doesn't even look human. Sam rises to his feet, his hand stretched out towards Amelia, and he exorcises her.
You look down at Jimmy, and for a moment you feel as though you could be looking at Castiel. But it all feels like it's happening miles and miles away. And if you ever become you again, you know you won't remember any of this.
"Of course we keep our promises," you hear your voice speak, but they aren't your words, "Of course you have our gratitude. You served us well. Your work is done. It's time to go home now. Your real home. You'll rest forever in the fields of the Lord. Rest now, Jimmy."
Dean frowns, his eyes wide with fear, "No... what about Y/N?"
"You can't take her," Sam exclaims.
"She's with me now," you admit, "She wanted this, she prayed to me. She said yes."
"No," Dean growls at the angel, walking up to him, "You find someone else, you hear me?"
"Me," Jimmy mutters, his voice weak with pain, "Take me, please."
Your family. Jimmy, your family.
Castiel pauses, hearing the faint sound of your voice in his head. "Y/N is thinking of your family - and what this means for them."
"I can't be with them," Jimmy cries, his blue eyes meeting with his wife and daughter, "they'd only be in danger. I can't... I can't protect them. Not like you, Castiel."
"Y/N," Sam speaks up, looking deep into your eyes, "You can't... you can't leave us."
What if this is what I'm meant to do?
"She believes this may be her destiny," Castiel speaks for you, in your own body and voice, "her place in all of this."
"Your place is by our side, okay?" Dean's lips are parted gently, he wears a tender expression on his face - and when he looks at you, it feels like he can see you, "We need you. Please. Cas, we need her."
"I know," you admit, looking down for a moment before turning to Jimmy, who looks paler by the second, "I want to make sure you understand. You won't die or age. If this last year was painful for you, picture a hundred, a thousand more like it."
"It doesn't m-matter," he whispers, "You take me. You take me and you keep my family safe - keep them safe!"
"As you wish."
You feel yourself drop to the floor, your eyes rolling to the back of your head slightly. The pain in your head is incredible but it only lasts for a moment before you're opening your eyes to the dull light of the warehouse. A pair of blue eyes hover over you. "Cas?"
"Yes," he takes your hands, helping you stand steadily.
You look around, seeing Sam and Dean's expectant and worried gazes set on you. Amelia hugs her child close to her, watching on his wide eyes. Castiel takes his hand off your back, heading for the door.
"Wait," you tug on his arm, craning your head up to look at him, "Don't go."
"I have to."
"You wanted to tell me something, Cas," you remind him, your eyes filled with expectant hope, "what was it?"
Cas pulls his arm away from your hold, standing up a little straighter. There's a distant look of terror and anger on his face - as if bringing this up was the worst thing you could possibly do.
"I learned a lesson while I was away," he begins, looking down on you harshly, "my loyalty and my servitude is dedicated to heaven - I'm not an Angel of man. And I'm certainly not your Angel."
Dean drives through the rain in silence. You're in the back seat, laying down with your legs tucked into yourself.
"All right, let's hear it," Sam announces, throwing his hands up.
Dean gives him a calm look, "What?"
"Drop the bomb," Sam notes, turning to you too now, "Yell, swear, tell me I'm insane. You both saw what I did."
"I was possessed by an Angel," you remind him, "but yeah, I saw what you did, Sam."
"And?" He exclaims in surprise more than anything, "Nothing?"
"I'm not mad, Sam," Dean sighs, his voice sounds tired and you know you sound the same. You could fall into a dreamless sleep right about now.
"You're not mad?" Sam repeats the phrase, knowing it's a lie from his brother, "And you, Y/N?"
"What do you want me to say, Sam? I tried to ask you for the truth, again and again," you remind him, "I tried to check up on you. You gave me nothing, every time, so... yeah, you get nothing from me."
"I just... let me explain myself, at least," Sam suggests, looking between you and Dean in the quiet car.
"Fine," you sigh.
"I-"
"Don't," Dean cuts his younger brother off, "I don't care. I mean, you want to know that I'm disappointed? Yeah, I am. But, mostly, I'm just... I'm tired, man. I'm done... I am just done."
You approach the door to the panic room, noticing the odd tension in the air. As Sam steps foot in, you're about to follow but Dean pulls you back, slamming the door behind Sam.
"Wh- Dean?" You look at him, your eyes wide with disbelief. Bobby slams the large lock down, s shutting Sam in with no escape. "Wait!"
"Guys?" Sam shouts, his hands banging against the metal door, "Dean?! This isn't funny!"
"This is for your own good, son," Bobby admits, shutting the latch on the tiny window. Sams screams can still be heard.