CHAPTER XXIV
Solana
Two days later, I'm pushing my bedroom door open and throwing my school bag to the side before crossing the distance between me and my bed. The moment I face-planted on the mattress, I groaned loudly.
Exhaustion had finally hit me like a tidal wave. Maybe it was because I had to open today at work, or maybe my six-thirty to nine-thirty class broke a piece of my sanity. Either way, I wanted to wash my body and curl into my covers.
With some encouraging thoughts, I managed to push myself off my bed before stripping out of my clothes and throwing them in my laundry basket. I made sure to put my recently washed hair in a neat bun before slipping on my robe and stepping out of my room. Luckily, my roommates weren't home—probably at the nearest bar—so I didn't rush up the stairs before entering Presley's bedroom.
It wasn't long until my body was scrubbed and dried. I also did my quick face routine before slipping on the robe again and jogging back to my room. But as I idled in front of my tall dresser, pulling the second drawer open, my efforts faltered.
My gaze fell onto the black tee-shirt I stuffed in here, when I returned from the airport yesterday afternoon. I wanted to deny ever taking it, but after mom's party at the penthouse, I was frantically packing my luggage while Kane was in the bathroom. I wanted to pretend that I thought the shirt was mine, but I knew right when I lifted it up, it was too big to belong to me.
But still, I shoved it in my luggage without a second thought.
Staring at it now, I clenched the fabric but still lifted it out of the drawer, instinctively bringing it to my nose. I inhaled the mahogany teakwood scent that seemed to be glued onto Kane, and I tightened my jaw, embarrassed and disappointed in myself. I'm supposed to be stronger than this.
After our argument at the penthouse, Kane made subtle efforts to start a conversation with me. I mumbled once to leave me alone, and he did. I wasn't sure why that hurt me, but I decided to avoid thinking of him—which hadn't worked in my favour, because my thoughts always trained back to him. What he was thinking. What he was doing.
Even though we sat next to each other on the plane, he kept silent. But my heart started tightening, because I remembered the brief glances he'd give me, when he thought I wasn't looking. Or how he made sure no one would push me around once we strolled down the aisle of the plane. The last thing he said to me was a softened "Goodbye" before he took his own Uber home.
Unintentionally, I found myself stripping out of my robe and throwing my arms into the shirt I stole from Kane. When I treaded to my full length mirror, I pulled on the end of the shirt, noticing it fell almost to the middle of my thighs. I didn't realize I lifted the collar of the shirt until I was sniffing it.
Jesus Christ, what was wrong with me?
My self-depraved thoughts were cut off when my ears perked at the sound of something ruffling. Since the house was eerily silent, I tried to pinpoint where the noise came from, only to slowly draw my gaze to the closed blinds shielding me from the night sky.
Hesitantly, I treaded to the window, but by the time I reached out to lift a single slat, my palms were sweating. Tipping my head forward, I closed one eye and peeked out the crack, only for a scream to get lodged in my throat when I saw a shadow standing on my flower bed.
Wide eyes turned to mine, just as I staggered back, gasping for air.
It took a few, long seconds for me to grasp what exactly just happened before I found the courage to step forward again. But this time, I reached for the string and yanked it back, watching as my blinds shot to the top of my window.
Blinking quickly with a rapid heart, my vision managed to adapt fast enough for me to realize who exactly was standing outside my bedroom window. I clenched my jaw and glared before releasing my tight grip of the string.
It thudded against my wall a few times as I stomped to the front of the window, unlocking the top knob before grasping the bottom handle. Kane watched me silently as I shot the window up, leaving a big enough space for him to climb through.
I stepped back and watched him with a furious glare, but some of my expression twisted in bewilderment when, instead of entering my room legs first, he slithered his ass inside. I didn't say anything as he sat on my bench, legs still hanging out of my window.
Some of my anger dimmed when I saw him reaching out the window, pulling his boots off individually and leaving it on the floor outside before fully seating himself in my room.
When he dropped his bare feet on my floor, he stood up and casually closed the window with one hand while watching me solemnly.
"That just took ten years off my life," I grounded out. "Why do you never tell me when you're coming over?"
"Because I didn't know if you'd open the window," he admitted, just as his eyes lowered to my clothes—or my lack there of. I stiffened in remembrance that I was wearing his shirt.
And he noticed, seeing as how his expression completely sobered as his eyes darkened, silently taking me in. My chest rose as I sucked in a breath, but I found myself struggling to release it. The hair on my arms stood as a result from his intense stare, and I forced a chuckle to avert my attention, even if my heart was roaring.
I found my voice, but my words came out softer than I intended. "Well, I would have."
Hearing my words, Kane finally lifted his hooded gaze—and I curled my toes to stop the urge to fiddle in my spot. He stared at me like he wanted to snatch me, and even though I was still angry with him, I couldn't help but feel not opposed to the idea.
"You never called me." His accusing tone made me jerk my head back in surprise, but he continued, his expression hardening with a mixture of frustration and something else. "You told me to leave you alone, so I gave you space. But I can't do this anymore. I'm going insane, and I'm tired of thinking about you all the fucking time."
I can't do this anymore. I felt my stomach plummet. "What do you mean?"
He inhaled and clenched his jaw, seemingly angry, but his eyes indicated differently. He almost looked... nervous.
"I'm sorry," he confessed, which completely threw me by surprise. Entirely focused on me, he watched me soberly as he stepped closer, chin tilted low. "I'm sorry how I acted. At the bar, and at your mom's place. I'm sorry if you thought I implied you were..." He grinded his teeth together and turned his head sideways. "You're not the problem in any of this. You're fucking perfect. You've always been perfect. I'm the one screwed in the head."
Hearing how sincerely he spoke about himself, I frowned. "What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, slowly moving closer to him before speaking with conviction. "You are not screwed in the head, Kane."
He laughed roughly, clearly in disbelief. "You don't know the shit I've had to deal with, Lonnie."
"Then tell me." I pressed a hand against my head and leaned forward, pleadingly. "Tell me what happened."
He was already starting to shake his head. "Solana..."
"Don't Solana me." My tone hardened before I stomped in front of him. Before I had time to think of my actions, I clasped his cheek with my hand and turned his face to me. His eyes sharpened on me, and my heart pounded harder against my chest, but I still curved my fingers underneath his prickly jaw. "You say I'm a bad liar, but so are you. You can't keep shutting me out. Let me understand you."
His expression twisted in pain, but my chest tightened when I saw his mouth raise in a small smile. "I never said you were a bad liar. I just said you were a pretty one."
Dropping my hand from his face, I glared playfully. "You with your flirting."
"It's not flirting if it's true."
I closed my eyes and scolded myself to not blush in any shape or form. With a few steady, calming breaths, I opened my eyes again, only to notice that Kane had been watching me silently, his expression clouded with a deep emotions I wasn't ready to label.
"Sit with me." I signalled to the bed before moving. By the time my butt landed on the mattress, Kane was already there, sitting on my right.
He watched me silently as I twisted my body in his direction. I lifted the side of my knee on the bed and curled it inwards before clasping my hands together. "Go. I'm all ears."
The corner of his mouth twisted in a soft smile. "I'd rather just make those cheeks of yours turn pink."
"Too bad."
He smiled a little wider, and I felt my shoulders relax with tension I didn't know I had. "How about later then?"
I rolled my eyes. "You can flirt until your heart is content. After you talk to me."
Seemingly satisfied with that, he grinned. But the longer he looked at me, the more expression began to sober, until all he was doing was watch me in silence.
"I have problems with loyalty," he started off a few seconds later, and my brows furrowed, surprised. He ignored me as he turned his head forward. His jawline sharpened as his jaw clenched. "I think it probably started when I was a kid. When my mom ended up leaving me after she found out my dad cheated."
This was the first time he'd ever mentioned his mom. That realization had me sitting up straighter. "She never visited. She just disappeared. In fucking thin air." Twisting his hand into a fist, he exhaled, "I was four, but I knew why she left. And I hated my dad for it. Not to mention how clueless he was to raise a kid. I was basically raised at my aunts house. If I was lucky, I'd see him once a week."
"When I became friends with Jonothan, he challenged our friendship, but I told him I was loyal. I liked to think I was, because I refused to be like my dad. And I think he liked that, probably because he assumed I'd agree with everything he'd do." He shrugged. "He wasn't wrong. I always stuck beside him."
"But I wasn't some fucking drone. I expected loyalty back." His words came out harsh and cold, and I tilted my head back, both in shock and unease. "So when I found out what Jon, my best friend, was doing junior year, I was pissed to say the least."
When he didn't continue right away, I asked carefully, "What did he do?"
With a cool, tight lipped smile, he twisted his gaze to me. "Football was always a hobby to him. I went into this because I actually loved the sport. And he knew I needed to be first string to get recruited for schools. He knew that. He supported that, at least, that's what he told me." Inhaling sharply, he shook his head. "Around the time we had to pick captain for senior year, I knew I was gonna get voted in. I was good, and the team knew it. The coach knew it."
My brows furrowed, remembering Jon's announcement that year. "But Jon won the spot."
Kane's eyes hardened. "Because your mom bribed the coach."
I wasn't expecting that.
"Wait—how? How do you know?" I stuttered, shaking my head in disbelief. "Mom may be obsessive when it comes to Jon, but not enough..." The longer I spoke, the more I realized, yes, mom was capable of what Kane was accusing.
"I overheard your mom talking to him." That explained the cold shoulder Kane had been giving to mom, especially the nervous glances she threw in his direction during the trip. "And what made it worse? Jon knew. And to top that all off? He was spreading rumours about me. Fucking gossiping about how shitty of a player I was. I think what really pushed me over the edge was when he started hinting that I was disloyal. That I was the liar in our relationship."
At this point, my jaw had fallen in complete surprise, because he was right—Jon always told everyone that Kane was the fake one in their friendship.
"That's why I switched schools senior year," he continued, his hand falling into his hair as he pushed the stubborn strands away from his forehead. His tipped his head back, so I could see his dark, satisfied smirk. "I got captain instantly, and I beat Jon's team in the state finals."
Stretching his back, he cocked his head and lingered his gaze over my stunned expression. The harsh lines on his face disappeared before he smiled faintly. "Do you see why you're my favourite Cohen now?"
I shook my head fast as memories from senior year swarmed back to me. All the feelings I had, all the thoughts of betrayal that lingered after Kane left my life. I found myself biting my tongue before I exclaimed, "So why me?"
Kane jerked his head back, briefly stunned by my outburst. He brows pulled together as he started to frown. "What do you mean?"
"Why did you put me in the middle? Why did you use me to get back at my brother?"
He frowned harder. "We both agreed to see each other—"
"Not this." I threw my arms out in exasperation before gesturing a hand between us. "Not us being in a relationship. I mean senior year."
For a moment, his eyes clouded in thought as he glanced to the floor. I continued with a pained sigh. "You sent a picture of me and you together, the day before the state finals, knowing what it would do to him. You used me."
His eyes flared in remembrance, and I watched hesitantly as his spine slowly straightened. He stared at me intensely, and I bit the urge to shiver before he opened his mouth, his voice rough as he demanded slowly, "Is that the reason why you never spoke to me again?"
Mouth suddenly dry, all I could do was watch his expression darken before he twisted his body to me. "That wasn't me," he said vehemently, and my heart jumped. "I never wanted to put you in the middle."
"Then why didn't you say something?" I accused, throwing my hand up in the direction of my front door as I spoke. "Why didn't you defend yourself? You just smirked and walked away!"
"Because I had no idea who sent it," he bit back, leaning closer to me as he fisted the mattress between us. "I left my phone in my gym bag. It was in my car. Trust me, when I invited you to get sushi with me, that wasn't how I planned the day to end." His harsh laugh made me frown in confusion.
I wanted to ask what he meant by that, but the words died in my throat when he slowly shook his head, almost sadly. "Then why did you walk away from me?" I hated how fragile I sounded. "Jon showed you the picture, and you just walked away."
"Because I was seconds away from punching your brother, Lana," he deadpanned. "And I didn't want you to see me like that. I also wanted to find out who the hell had my phone, but by the time I got back to the car, it was already back in the pocket."
"And what? Why do you think I stopped talking to you?"
"Honestly? I thought Jon convinced you I was the villain." His admission made me jerk back, surprised by how hurt I was. "It would be easier if you hated me."
"Easier for who? You?" My tone hardened with aggravation.
He matched my expression as he shuffled closer to me—enough for our knees to almost touch. "For both of us. I was being practical. We could never be friends when I hated your twin, Lonnie."
"That wasn't your decision to make." He flinched, not missing the hostility in my tone.
"That's your family," he forced out deeply, and I held a breath as his eyes settled on mine. "I wasn't about to make you turn on them for my benefit, no matter how I felt about them."
"You'd rather I resent you than be mad at my family?" I asked in disbelief. "Why?"
His expression turned callous. "Because I cared for you." The words rippled free from him, and I sat, frozen, as I took in his words. "Because I didn't want to live knowing I was responsible for you and your brother hating each other."
"And now?" I asked softly.
His back straightened, and I slowly breathed in as his eyes took in every inch of my face. By the end, his eyes sharpened with resolve. "Jon doesn't deserve you in his life."
I couldn't help but smile at his words. His eyes dipped to my mouth and lingered, his expression turning hungry before his gaze darted back to mine. "About New York—"
"Don't." I shut my eyes and sighed before reopening them. "I know you were drunk, Kane. Let's just leave it in the past."
My words made him pause, before a deeper, meaningful look crossed his face. He didn't hide his lust now, and I was staring back at him, struggling to breathe.
"I wasn't drunk," he said, his voice soft.
His words raised the hair on my arms, just as I felt my cheeks tinged red. His eyes drooped and darkened before I whispered, "Neither was I."
There was a long beat of silence as we just stared at each other. But as if we were magnetics with opposite charges, our body moved simultaneously, and my vision blurred. My body wasn't my own, and I accepted it as I reached to grasp onto his shoulders.
His hand curled possessively around my neck, and I brokenly whispered, "Christian," before he collided my mouth to his.
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fun fact: I went on vacation!
another fun fact: I GOT SICK.
I'm finally better, aka on my
last day, but it was nice while
it lasted :')
I hope your week went better than
mine, I'll see you loves next week