CHAPTER 2
ISANG MALAKAS na sampal ang tumama sa kaliwang pisngi ni Syl habang nakaupo siya sa pang-isahang sofa sa salas at kaharap ang mga magulang. Ang sampal na 'yon ay galing sa ama niya na galit na galit dahil hindi niya nagawa ang inutos nito sa kaniya. Pero kahit ramdam ni Syl ang sakit, nanatili siyang nakaupo at ininda ang sakit sa pisngi niya. Walang emosyon na kumawala sa mukha niya.
She was used to this. This was nothing new.
"Napaka-simple ng pinapagawa ko!" singhal ng ama niya. "Ilang buwan na kayong kasal ni Izaak pero nahihirapan ka pa ring kumuha ng pera?! Hindi ba sabi ko sa 'yo na pagsilbihan mo siya?! Kung kailangan mong lumuhod para lang paligayahin siya at makakuha ka ng pera, gawin mo! Ano sa tingin mo ang rason kung bakit ka naming pinakasal sa kaniya?" Her father clicked his tongue in annoyance. "The only good thing about you is your pretty face, Dinsyl. Other than that, you have nothing. So, go back to your house now and use that pretty face to get some money!"
"Yes, Dad," Syl quietly replied and stood up.
Hindi pa siya tuluyang nakakalabas ng salas nang may humawak sa braso niya. Ang ina niya 'yon. And Syl knew her hell was about to continue.
"Syl, please understand your father," anang ina sa nangungusap sa boses. "Kailangan lang talaga natin ng pera para sa kompaniya. Nag-invest kasi ang dad mo at hanggang ngayon, hindi pa bumabalik ang investment niya. Just hang in there, okay? I'm sure Izaak will give you money, especially if you ask him in bed."
Syl wanted to vomit in disgust and shove her mother away from her, but she remained emotionless and docile. Walang magandang mangyayari kung magwawala siya. Mas mahihirapan lang siya lalo. All she needed to do was listen and get money from Izaak.
Easily said than done.
After she stole some money from Izaak a few months ago, Izaak had been suspicious of her and nasty. Syl understood why Izaak was treating her badly, but she still couldn't help herself from hating him because he was the personification of her hell. Every time she saw Izaak, all her misery since they came back from Bali came crashing in, overwhelming her until she couldn't breathe anymore.
'Get money from Izaak. Seduce Izaak. Sleep with Izaak and ask for money while you're pleasing him. Izaak is rich and we need his money. Kneel if that's what Izaak wants.' Hearing this again and again and again made Syl hate the name Izaak and the person who owned it.
She wanted to scream all her frustration and misery, but she had to remain prim and proper or her mother would discipline her.
"I will, Mom," was all Syl said, and she stepped out of the house and went to hail a taxi.
Sitting at the backseat of the taxi, Syl held her tears in. No use in crying, it couldn't change anything.
It couldn't change the fact that she had no car, no money for herself, no means to earn money, and that she was a thief.
She was a broke and miserable housewife.
So many days she was tempted to call her sister and ask for help. But if Ria found out and came home, their parents might abuse her too. I'll sleep better if it's just me who's suffering. Ria was now a successful pilot. She shouldn't disturb her. I can still endure. It was just a slap. I can fix it with a cold compress and makeup.
Nang makarating ang taxi sa harap ng bahay na inuukupa nila ni Izaak, nagbayad siya at lumabas na. Buti may natira pa sa kakarampot niyang savings noong nagta-trabaho pa siya. Kahit papaano, may pambayad pa siya sa taxi.
Nang makapasok sa kabahayan, kaagad siyang binati ni 'Nay Koring. Tumango lang siya at dumeretso sa kuwarto nilang mag-asawa. Izaak seldom came home and stayed, so it was her room.
Opening her closet to change, Syl sighed at the clothes she had. Everything was hand-picked by her mother. She was advised to be a dainty and demure woman, because she said it was more appealing, she said it was sexier—a demure woman with a wild side could seduce Izaak easily, she said.
Syl bit her lower lip to stop her tears from falling. She sucked it in and went to the bathroom. When she stepped out, she was surprised to see her husband inside the room, but she was not surprised to see him packing. I'm sure he's going to the island again.
Taking a deep breath, Syl readied herself and sat on the edge of the bed.
I can't and won't seduce him, but I can do other things. She didn't want to be hit by her father anymore the next time she was called. She didn't want to be slapped and talk down to again. She just needed a little break and she could lie and pretend just to get that break.
When Izaak saw his wife crying, he blew out a loud irritated breath knowing what was coming next—her annoying speech and her guilt-tripping. And he was right. When Syl opened her mouth, her annoying speech started.
"I need money, Izaak, and I won't let you say no." She glared at him while crying. "If you didn't agree to this marriage, we wouldn't be here in the first place. If you didn't agree, I would be still working, providing for myself, but because you agreed, I was kicked out! I need money! Not allowance, but money! I'm your wife!"
Izaak gritted his teeth and threw a signed and blank cheque at Syl. "Beat yourself up." Zipping his duffel bag, he stormed out of the room and left his wife inside.
Meanwhile, Syl dried her tears when Izaak left the room, and her eyes settled on the cheque Izaak threw on the floor.
Biting her lip and swallowing all her pride, she leaned down and picked up the cheque. She wanted nothing more than to crumple it, but she calmed herself and thought of the amount that would not bother Izaak, but would keep her parents happy for a while.
Genuine tears fell from her eyes. One by one. One tear after another until she could no longer breathe and had to breathe through the paper bag that she always kept in her bag just in case.
Alone in that cold room, Syl was on the floor, breathing deeply and heavily through the paper bag to calm down and stay breathing and alive.
GIVING THE CHEQUE to her parents, Syl felt relieved when she saw them happy. Happy parents meant no pain for her—no slaps and painful words. And that was enough to make Syl happy. It was more than enough.
"I should go," Syl said and stood up. "I need to return to Izaak's house."
Her father smiled, pleased. "Yes. Take care of Izaak. Give him whatever he needs, even if you have to bend and beg."
Syl just nodded silently and left, but when her mother followed her outside, she had a bad feeling already. And she was always right.
"Syl."
Nilingon ni Syl ang ina. "Yes, Mom?"
"Thank you for giving money to your father." Napakabait ng boses nito, napakalambing, pero alam na alam ni Syl ang nakakalason na ugali ng ina. "He needs it. And now, it's my turn to ask, right?" Nang hindi sumagot si Syl, humigpit ang hawak ng ina nito sa braso nito na parang gusting baliin 'yon. "Noong huli akong bumisita sa bahay ni Izaak, maraming mamahaling kagamitan doon. There's this beautiful vase that is surely expensive. Why don't you sell it and buy me the luxury bag I've been hoping to get my hands on? Ayaw bilhin ng dad mo para sa 'kin ang bag, pero mayroon na ang kumare ko. Hindi puwedeng wala ako ng bag na 'yon kaya naman sa 'yo ko na lang hihilingin. Madali lang naman, 'di ba 'nak? Mas mahirap pa ang ipanganak ka at alagaan. I gave up my freedom for you, you know that, right, Syl? You owe me that much."
Syl could feel a searing pain from her arm that was being gripped tightly by her mother. Seeing how her mother would react if she said no, Syl nodded. "I'll see what I can do, Mom."
Kaagad na ngumiti ang ina at niyakap si Syl. Syl hugged her back, but it was a forceful movement.
"Sige, Mom. Alis na ako."
Her mother was grinning from ear to ear. "Okay. Ingat ka. By the way, 'nak, I want the bag the day after tomorrow. May pupuntahan akong party. I have to be glamorous."
Tumango lang si Syl saka lumabas ng bahay at doon lang siya nakahinga nang matiwasay. Kapagkuwan ay kinuha niya ang wallet sa bag niya at napabuntonghininga nang makita ng ilang libo na lang 'yon at hindi niyon kayang bilhin ang bag na gusto ng ina niya.
Syl sighed. Do I have to sell Izaak's furniture? Mapapansin ba nito? Palagi naman 'yon wala sa bahay.
Syl felt bad, but she had no time to feel bad for others. If selling that vase and buying her mother the bag she wanted would keep her arm whole and not broken, then she'd sell it.
Taking a deep breath, she left her parents' house and waited for a taxi. Nang halos kalahating oras na siyang naghihintay pero wala pa ring dumadaan, sinubukan niyang kumuha ng taxi online, pero hindi pa rin siya kaagad nakahanap, kaya naman nag-umpisa siyang maglakad habang naghihintay ng driver na tatanggap sa booking niya.
She could ask her parents to drive her home, but it would be too suffocating for her. She'd rather take a taxi.
Syl took a deep breath and looked up at the sky to stop her tears from falling. This is nothing. Kaya ko 'to, pangungumbinsi niya sa sarili habang pinipigilan ang maluha. Wala namang mangyayari kung iiyak siya. Hindi masi-resolba ng luha niya ang problema niya.
Sa mga sandaling 'yon, nasa isip niya ang tumakbo. Tumakbo ng malayong-malayo sa mga magulang niya. Pero wala siya ng lakas ng loob. Natatakot siya. Hindi dahil hindi niya kaya kundi dahil sa kaparusahan na matatanggap niya kapag nahuli siya ng mga magulang niya.
She already tried running away once. When Ria ran away, she followed her example and ran away too—to escape. But her father caught her before she could put a great distance between them and what happened next was the reason why she never tried to run away again. Even if it killed her, she was not going to run away again.
Huminga nang malalim si Syl saka pilit na inalis sa alaala ang nangyari sa nakaraan at kalmadong tumingin siya sa screen ng cellphone niya. Wala pa ring tumatanggap sa booking niya at wala pa ring taxi na bakante na dumaan.
Syl just continued walking towards the highway. It was hot, she was sweaty, but she didn't care. She just wanted to go home and rest.
Then out of nowhere, a car pulled over beside her. Syl didn't look nor stop, she hastened her steps until she heard a familiar soft baritone voice calling her name.
"Syl?"
Syl stopped and the car moved to catch up to her then pulled over beside her.
"Syl."
Syl calmly turned to face the car and unconsciously stepped back when she saw who it was—a man she never expected to see ever again.
Ream Oliveros.
The window on the driver's seat rolled down, and there he was, the first choice she made for herself, smiling nicely at her like he was happy and pleased to see her.
"I was right." Ream's smile widened even more, his whole face brightening in delight. "I knew it was you. How could I forget?"
A frown made its way to Ream's face when he Syl was quiet. Different from the Syl he met in Bali—the outspoken Syl. The Syl in front of him looked afraid and wary of him.
Did I scare her by popping out of nowhere? Ream didn't want that, but it was not his fault either! He was just driving back to his store after delivering a ring to a new big client and he saw her on the sidewalk. Just like that. Akala niya namamalikmata lang siya kaya itinigil niya ang sasakyan.
"Did I do something to scare you?" Ream couldn't help asking.
Syl just shook her head without saying anything.
What happened to her? For some reason, he was worried. "May I drive you?" That didn't sound right. "To your destination, I mean."
Syl stared at Ream. His first choice was asking her, like her decision and answer mattered. Why does his question sounds so foreign to me? Was it because he was asking and waiting for my reply like it mattered?
"Do you want to have coffee with me?" Ream tried again. He just didn't want to let Syl go. He had been looking—no, he, um, had been hoping to see her for a few months now, so to just let her go now didn't sit well with him.
"No. I don't want to," Syl replied after a little while.
"Oh." Well, Ream would be happy if the answer was 'yes', but a no was a no. A lot could happen in six months. "May I at least get your number?"
Syl shook her head. "No."
Ream lips parted, stunned at Syl's straightforward answer, but he managed to pull himself together. He was not expecting that. He thought Syl would be happy to see him, after that night they shared, but maybe it was just him making it up in his head. Maybe she didn't enjoy it like he did.
"I'm sorry for approaching you," Ream blurted out when he realized that maybe it was just him who enjoyed that night. She left before he woke up after all. "I'll get going now. Take care of yourself, Syl."
Syl nodded, but didn't reply and just watched him drive off.
Looking at Syl through the side mirror, Ream sighed and massaged his tightening chest. He went back to Bali hoping to see her, talking about fate and coincidental meetings, but he couldn't deny that he was looking for her. And now that he finally saw her, she didn't want him. Plain and simple.
I guess...it's not meant to be. Oh, fuck, I need a drink.
Ream needed a drink and Syl didn't want to see him again, but he still parked his car near Syl with just enough distance that she wouldn't notice.
At mula sa sasakyan niya, matiyaga siyang naghintay hanggang sa makasakay si Syl ng taxi. At nang madaanan siya ng taxi na kinalululanan ni Syl, naghintay siya ng ilang segundo hanggang sa hindi na niya matanaw ang sasakyan, saka lang niya pinausad ang sariling sasakyan at nagmaneho pabalik sa jewelry store niya.
He thought today was going to be a good day because fate finally let him met Syl, but it was the opposite. It was one of the worst days of his life.
CECELIB | C.C.