Before anything, thank you very much to all those who ordered a copy of DUIH on Amazon! Your support is overwhelming I swear.
And even if you didn't, just know that your beautiful comments and messages are enough to warm my heart 🤍
(For those who don't know what I'm talking about) I published my book Dance Until It Hurts in Amazon for you to have it in it's physical version.
As for this story, its going to have around 20 chapters and an epilogue, and I'm writing like a crazy person because I'm really submerged in it 💁🏼♀️
Also, I want to ask you (for those who know me) if you already figured out why this fic is called like this, and if you found out what is the detail that I always add that is "their thing."
Anygays, I really hope you enjoy this next chapter!
Love you all.
Mag 🦋
TEN / FIGHTER.
[ Louis' POV ]
Doncaster.
It's been two weeks and Harry has been better than ever.
Every time I find him at the park after work, he is smiling while playing his usual song. And even people have started to leave him some money at his feet, so now at least he has something to hold on to, something to buy food and something to survive with.
And I have never felt prouder.
Of course I still gave him breakfast in the morning and something at the end of the day for dinner, but most of the time he insisted on sharing.
Today in fact, I was driving towards the park with the guitar laying on the backseat, and a food container with two boxes of juice so we could just have breakfast together before heading to the office.
It has also become a routine for me to get up an hour earlier everyday so I could spend it with him at the park.
Harry was still reluctant to sleep in my car or to accept anything else I offered him for that matter.
And everyday it just ached more.
I wanted nothing more than to just take him to my flat with me every night.
But if he wasn't accepting sleeping in my car, he wouldn't accept spending the night at my place either.
So I just opted to get closer to him, to get him to open up, to talk and with time convince him to stay away from the streets.
This morning people were gathered and manifesting really close to the park, so there was a traffic jam everywhere and they weren't letting me get through to park my car.
I parked a few blocks from the park and even further away from my job, but it was the spot best I could find.
When I got out of the car with my bag and the guitar in hand, people were already surrounding me, screaming and shaking their signs with the faces of the missing ones.
I excused myself and got through them as quickly as I could, pushing some of them in the process in order to keep the guitar safe.
At the edges of the large group of people shouting, there were a couple of police officers containing the situation.
And they all seemed ready to repress if the people got out of control.
When I reached the park, I was surprised to find Harry standing over a bench, staring at the multitude in the streets.
He seemed lost in thoughts, so I tried to make him notice me by getting closer and slowly waving at him, getting him out of his trance.
"Hey Harry."
Harry looked down at me from where he was standing but didn't answer me. Instead it was as if in his eyes he wasn't even recognizing me.
His eyes seemed… empty.
And then he turned to look back at the manifestation with shaking shoulders.
His body started to shudder and he was blinking over and over again as if he wanted to get rid of the image in front of his eyes.
And then, just like that, he jumped off the bench and started running away from me and into the depths of the park.
"What?" - I mumbled to myself.
And then I started running behind him.
Somewhere along the way, I threw my bag and the guitar at the grass to be able to keep running.
I was running a few meters behind him, but even from a distance, his heavy breathing was pretty audible.
Harry was running so fast I couldn't believe it was possible for a guy like him, for a guy that doesn't eat good enough, or that doesn't get a good night sleep.
I wasn't able to reach him until he stopped in the middle of some bushy trees and looked up at the sky, shouting his lungs out.
He shouted for what it seemed like hours.
A long and heartbreaking shout that felt endless to my ears.
I stayed behind him, contemplating the situation but not wanting to interrupt his catharsis.
He was screaming to the sky, while some tears were running down his cheeks and his body was trembling.
Suddenly he fell onto his knees and his hands went to his chest.
He was having trouble breathing, he was coughing and choking on his own crying.
And that's when I decided to step in.
I ran to his side, kneeling down next to him and wrapping my arms around him tightly.
"Shh… Harry, love. It's okay."
"Don't touch me!" - He screamed with his broken voice and I quickly moved away, separating from him.
"Harry… please angel, it's me. Louis." - I said softly.
"Leave me alone!" - He said again, still crying and breathing heavily.
"I'm not leaving you, Harry. I won't touch you if that's what you want. It's okay. But I'm here for you. Can you look at me, love? Please?"
And then, he looked up at me, finally acknowledging my presence for what it felt like the first time.
His eyes widened and he mouthed for air.
"Lou…" - He cried.
"Yes angel, it's me."
"I'm sorry, Lou. I'm sorry." - He sobbed.
"You have nothing to be sorry for."
"I… I don't… I didn't know… I didn't know it was you." - He whispered while sobbing.
"It's okay, I know. Everything is alright." - I said calmly.
"I can't breathe."
"Okay, let's breathe together, yeah?" - I said and he nodded.
I breathed in and out exaggeratedly, so I could set a rhythm for him to follow.
Harry tried to do as I was doing, calming him down almost immediately.
His breathing got back to normal again, only a couple of tears remaining.
"I can't stop crying. I'm sorry. I'm just…"
"It's okay, I won't ever judge you. Cry as much as you need."
"Okay." - He sniffled.
"Okay." - I mumbled.
I noticed how he was slowly stopping to tremble and I smiled to myself a little.
I continued with the deep and exaggerated breathing so he could follow me a little longer, eventually getting him to calm down completely and stop crying.
He looked up at me with puffy and red eyes and I smiled softly in return.
"How are you feeling, love?"
"Better." - He whispered.
"Okay, that's good."
"I'm.. sorry. For telling you not to touch me."
"Harry, you don't have to be sorry for that. If you don't want to be touched, then nobody should touch you. That's just how it is."
Harry sobbed and started crying once again.
"But you can. I want you to." - He sobbed and pressed his palms on his eyes. - "I need you to."
I felt my chest clenching and a lump in my throat.
"Harry, can I hold you?"
"Please." - He whispered without looking at me.
"Okay."
I softly moved to his side again, letting my arms rest around his torso and pulling him against my chest.
Harry hid his face inside my jacket, and pressed his cheek on my collarbone.
I tilted my head to kiss his hair sweetly and I started to rock him back and forth just to soothe him a little.
"I want to stop crying. I don't like to cry."
"I don't think anyone likes to cry. But it's okay to. You're allowed to cry, angel. And I'll be here until you're smiling again."
"Why do you call me angel?" - He mumbled against my shirt and still covering his face with the inside of my jacket.
"Because you are."
He straightened up and looked at me.
His face was really close to my own and his body was still leaning over mine.
He was frowning and staring right into my eyes, his pursed lips inches from mine.
"Don't say that."
"You asked." - I shrugged and smiled at him.
He huffed and returned to his previous position, burying his face under my jacket and letting out a deep sigh.
I tightened my arms around him and he whimpered.
"Sorry."
"It's fine." - He whispered. - "I like it when you hold me."
"I'll hold you anytime, angel. Forever if necessary."
We both fell into a large and tense silence.
I honestly was waiting for him to speak, to explain himself maybe a little.
But he didn't.
He stayed still under my grip.
I could feel his nose breathing against my collarbone and his fingers playing with the buttons of my jacket.
The screaming of the multitude was still hearable at a distance and it just made me relive Harry's reaction over again inside my head.
And I knew I needed answers.
Not because I was being curious, but because I needed to know what I was dealing with.
"Harry, I'm sorry. But I really need to ask…"
"Please no."
"Angel, I want to understand."
"No… don't."
"What happened back there?"
"Nothing."
"That wasn't nothing, love. Something triggered you. What was it?"
"Stop it."
"Love… please. I can't help you if I don't know what's happening in your head."
"You can't help me anymore, Louis. You've done enough. Stop asking." - He said again, his face still hidden inside my jacket.
I shook my head and pulled him away from me, needing to look into his eyes in search of an answer.
"Harry… Why do you live in the streets?"
He froze and his lip trembled.
I feared that he was going to burst into tears once again.
But luckily he didn't.
"I don't know." - He said, looking at the ground.
"But I'm sure there's little parts you remember. You told me. Please share it with me, I want to understand you fully."
"Lou…"
"Just give me something, yeah? Not the complete story. But something." - I begged.
"Fine." - He sighed, playing with his fingers down in his lap. - "I.... I remember waking up on an empty train wagon someday, it was freezing cold and I was laying on my own… puke and you know… feces. I… I really don't know how I got there, but as soon as the train stopped at the station, I got out with the pieces of my guitar that I was still holding tightly against myself, and when I looked at the sign, it was here. Doncaster. The train left, and I stayed."
"That's… that's the only thing you remember? You aren't from Doncaster?"
"No, I'm not from here." - He shrugged. - "And I do remember bits of what happened before that, but it's mostly blurry. Like an old and dark room with a dirty bed, and some guy who was very much alike to that cop at the manifestation."
"You know one of the cops there?"
"No, he is just in my blurry memories. I don't think I knew him, he gave me drinks that usually put me to sleep and made me throw up in the morning."
"That guy drugged you?"
"If you want to put it that way."
"That cop?"
"I don't know! I don't remember everything! Maybe it wasn't him at all, Louis. Just… nevermind."
"No… okay, sorry. Sorry." - I said, reaching out to grab his hand.
I started running my thumb in circles over the back of his hand and calming him down once more.
"Harry… I… I don't know how to ask this, but maybe you were kidnapped? And… Do you remember having a family or a house before that dark room?"
He sighed and shook his head.
"I don't remember them. But I feel like I do have a family. Like, those only memories I have weren't from my whole life, that were just recent."
"Okay… would you like me to maybe help you? I think… maybe I'm wrong… but maybe talking about it would help you remember more stuff."
"No. I don't want to talk about this. Please don't make me."
"Okay, okay. We won't talk about this anymore." - I said softly.
"And I don't want your help either. I'm good like this."
"But what if you have someone looking for you? What if…"
"Louis stop! I can't go back. I can't!"
"Why?"
"Because if I go back they are going to take me again. I'm safe here. Just let it go, Lou. Please."
I sighed, but reluctantly agreed.
"If that's what you want."
"Yes."
I gulped but nodded.
"Do you want to go pick up the guitar and have something to eat? I think I left my bag with food somewhere."
His eyes immediately lightened up and nodded enthusiastically.
I laughed and stood up, extending my hand to him and pulled him up with me.
~
It's needless to say that I skipped work that day too.
I stayed all day long playing guitar with Harry at the park, eating the bags of food I had prepared for him and eventually going to the gas station to buy some more food for the rest of the day.
When the night fell, he refused my offer to sleep in my car once again and I reluctantly left him in the park as every other night.
I got home feeling a little defeated.
Not only for Harry's continuous rejections to my offers of giving him a better place to sleep, but also because he didn't want help at all.
He didn't want a way out of his living situation.
He felt safe that way.
As weird as it sounds.
I hit the steering wheel a few times and growled.
It was frustrating.
I just wanted to help him, I just wanted to make him see he can have a great life, a future, but he doesn't want it.
He doesn't fucking want it.
And I was sick of it.
I slammed the door of my car and made my way to my flat.
The only thing in my mind was to collapse in my bed and sleep until the next day.
But when I stepped into the living room, Emily screamed at me to be quiet.
"What?" - I whispered. - "Why?"
"Shhhhh!"
"What's going on?"
"Shut up Louis, I'm listening!" - She said, her eyes focused on the television.
"Oh, c'mon Em. Again with the news? It's depressing." - I reached out for the remote and turned the tv off.
"No! Hey. I was watching that."
"You're obsessed! C'mon. It will only make you more paranoid."
"No, because there was actually a girl speaking, and she started like an organization and they already found seven of the missing people in their city. And she's saying that the police are involved in all the kidnappings, so she's trying to get them down. So turn the damn television on again."
I huffed and turned it on once more.
"Is that her?" - I asked, pointing to the brunette on the screen.
"Yes. Shut up." - She said sharply and I rolled my eyes.
"We have been working and searching all through the city and we were lucky enough to get in time to save these seven people that had been missing for months now.
We were able to speak with them and get some information, but they are also really traumatized after everything they have been through.
Of course there's still a lot of people out there that need to return to their families, to their homes. And we're looking for them. Everywhere. We won't stop until everyone is safe again.
We're doing everything in our power, we're connecting to the different cities and districts to find more people to help and join us. We know we aren't the only ones who lost their loved ones, and honestly we need all the help we can get.
Police aren't on our side, actually most of them are helping the kidnappers get away with it. And we won't let it happen anymore.
Any information you may have about the missings, or any suspicious activity in your neighborhood, you can communicate with me or my partner.
Thank you."
The girl smiled politely at the interviewer and below her image there were two phone numbers and her name.
Gemma Styles.