Holi wakes to the sun filtering through a crack in the heavy bedroom curtains. Her body has never felt so warm, she is wrapped in what can only be described as a cacoon. It makes her feel safe, warm, and even a little content even though her neck is painful. she realizes that she is not on the floor but back on the bed. confusion sets in. Mac is not a small boy, but he is certainly not strong enough to get her back on the bed without waking her and she does not remember climbing back onto the bed last night. She lifts her head to see how Mac and Bell are doing but her heart drops when she sees they are not in the bed.
she unwraps herself from the cacoon and stumbles out of the bed, checking the bathroom they are not in there either. She hates the feeling of not knowing where they are and immediately her mind goes to a dark place. how can it not, she comes from a dark place...her siblings come from a dark place. She is their protector and if they are not here with her then that would mean they are exposed, out in the open and anything can happen.
It's not a normal reaction, she is well aware of that, but when you have seen both your siblings on the brink of death for various reasons it's very difficult to keep your thoughts happy.
by the time she bursts out of the bedroom, her chest is burning and fear has tears threatening to spill down her flushed cheeks. she is sprinting down the passage towards what she hopes is the kitchen, lounge, or just any room that Austin is hopefully in. The thought makes her step falter for a second, why would she be trying to locate Austin when Bell and Mac are in trouble.
She knows the answer without having to dwell on it too much. Austin makes her feel safe and if anything she just knows he could fix anything. It scares her, she has never had anyone she can count on and she was good with that, it was a choice on her part. What is not a choice though is how she has become attached to Austin...it scares her.
by the time she has run down the long passage and reached the indoor waterfall she is practically sprinting and trying with all her willpower not to start shouting out her sibling's names. The thoughts running through her mind now are just evil and her whole body is shaking.
but then she hears Bell's sweet little giggle and she stops dead in her tracks. What the hell! It sounds like it is coming from the kitchen so she walks gingerly in that direction and hides behind a pillar while peering into the kitchen. The sight before her has her body shaking again, but now for a whole different reason.
Mac is standing, looking like a normal teen with washed hair and new clothing, he is holding Bell who is still in her Lobster pj's. She is kicking her little legs and clapping her hands. They both have bright faces and smiles that make Holi's heart squeeze. They are watching Austin who is busy cooking something.
"Again, again!" Bell squeals between her giggles. Austin turns and tickles her belly playfully causing her to only giggle louder and kick her legs harder, "Ok Bell," Austin says, with a soft smile on his face as he looks at her, "but this is the last time. Sir Charles might pop if we feed him too much."
"Pop!" Bell squeals.
Austin leans over and picks up a blueberry then calls sir Charles over to him. He was on the other side of the kitchen island and comes bouncing and wobble running very excitedly towards Austin then spinning round and round until Austin bends down and rolls the blueberry across the kitchen floor.
Sir Charles goes insane he starts bounding after the blueberry, barking and snapping at it until it stops then he dives on it and gobbles it up. He looks like a cartoon character. Bell has completely lost any composure she had earlier and she falls apart laughing in Mac's arms. Holi can immediately feel the hot tears on her cheeks. that happy full belly laugh that Bell has just expelled is new, Holi has never heard her laugh like that before.
It's a truly happy laugh and Holi suspects that if Bell had not been born to the mundane and barely good enough life Holi gives her the laugh Bell has now would be her every day, all the time laugh and not just a laugh she has only been able to find now.
"Mac put Bell down and grab two plates from that top cupboard, please. These pancakes are ready," Austin says and Mac does Austin as asked. Bell immediately goes running towards Sir Charles who flops down on his back so she can give him a belly rub.
Holi turns her eyes back onto Austin. He is stunning, to be honest. He is only in loose-fitting jeans that must be his favorite attire judging by the fact that they are the same ones he was wearing yesterday and the frayed hems by his heels. He has no shirt on and so Holi can see how every defined muscle on his back flexes as he moves around while dishing up the pancakes that he has just cooked onto the plates Mac is holding.
He then tells Mac to take Bell and go eat in the lounge. Mac turns and walks out to the lounge with the plates calling Bell to come eat her food. Holi stays where she is, not sure how to disturb the very domestic, family-like scene that's before her. Austin pops his pan in the sink and turns to make coffee, Holi gets a full view of his back and groans softly into her hand at how pathetic her crush on him is.
"If the mattress is too soft for you, we will get a firmer mattress," Austin says suddenly then turns around and looks at the pillar while leaning on the counter, "I don't want to find you sleeping on the floor again...Holi, come out from behind the pillar."
How the hell did he know she was there? this is why she does not trust him, there is something suspicious about him. Then it dawns on her that he was the one that obviously came into her room and put her back on the bed. The idea gives her butterflies and that is a problem, a very real problem.
She needs to be spending her time looking for a job and figuring out how the fuck she is going to feed and look after Bell and Mac, not getting all tingly over her warm feelings for Austin. She reminds herself that he is just doing this to make himself feel better about being a well-known football star and earn some brownie points with his fans.
It does not matter that he said no media or photos when he met Mac. There will come a time somewhere down the line in his career when he needs a boost and he will let the world know how kind he is, how he opened his home to poor street kids and gave them a happy life for the weekend. she bets when he is asked what happened he will claim that some people can't be saved and they chose to not be helped. That's just what rich people are like and Austin is no different.
Ren said it himself, Austin had been born with a silver spoon in his mouth so he has come from money, he was probably one of those kids whose parents give them a limitless credit card and claimed that they can only use it for emergencies - emergencies being salted caramel lattes with cream on top.
"Holiday," Austin pops his head around the pillar, breaking Holi's thoughts. he looks her up and down then frowns, "you wanna tell me why you are hiding behind this pillar?" he says and hands her a cup of coffee.
She takes the coffee from him, "I was not hiding, don't be so dramatic," she says as she walks into the lounge. Austin followed quietly behind her. Mac and Bell are watching cartoons and shoving bits of pancake into their mouths. When Bell sees Holi she hops off the couch and runs over to her.
"Mommy," she says with stretched-out arms for Holi to pick her up. Holi puts her coffee on the table and picks Bell up regretting it immediately because Bell's hands are sticky with syrup so now her arms and shoulders are also sticky. Great.
Bell hugs her tight and she forgets about the syrup. Then Bell wriggles out of her arms and runs to her plate then comes back to her holding up her plate to Holi, "share," she says and Holi feels proud. Proud that they might be in one of the most expensive houses ever and there is an abundance of everything, Bell still remembers some values that Holi has been proud to instill in her.
"I will make more for her Bell, you eat that," Austin says to Bell, but she frowns and shakes her head, "always share...always," she says so Holi breaks a tiny piece off and pops it into her mouth, "thank you for sharing Bell," Holi says and Bell looks like she is so proud she could burst.
She walks over to Austin and holds up her plate to him, he breaks a small piece off her plate and swallows it, "thank you, Bell," he says and Holi can tell he is using all his might to keep his voice stable. Then he turns on his heel and walks quickly out of the Lounge. Bell climbs back onto the couch, snuggling up to Mac to continue eating the rest of her pancakes and watching cartoons.
Holi goes to find Austin and sees him leaning on the kitchen island sipping on his coffee, he looks like his thoughts have carried him a million miles away. but he snaps out of his thoughts when he sees Holi walking in. "I have been around a lot of wise men in my life Holi, but Bell humbles me," he stops talking and takes a sip of his coffee. He is clearly affected by Bell.
Holi does not know how to deal with that. Her first instinct is to roll her eyes and tell him they don't want his pity. But this is not pity, it's something else. She has an urge to reach out and touch him, wrap her arms around him and bury her head in his chest. Her fingers ich at just the thought and for a second she drops her wall and takes a step forward
But before she reaches him his phone rings and the moment is broken, she remembers why she is here. She is a charity case for him, and so are Mac and Bell. They are like animals in a zoo for rich people, Austin will feel sorry and be affected by them until something else shiny and new comes along.
Holi leaves Austin to his phone call and joins Bell and Mac in the lounge. After a while, Austin comes in with a plate of fresh pancakes for Holi. When he sits next to her on the couch, he leaves no space between them and her body reacts immediately to him, she finds she leans into him slightly, and judging by the smile on his face he has not missed her reaction to him.
"I have practice today. I thought you guys could come to watch. We can swim again after and then dinner again, pretty much the same as last night."
"Yes, let's do that! Can I meet some of the other players?" Mac says as he sits up straight and starts putting his shoes on. This is perfect, the stadium he will be doing his practice session in is bound to have payphones so she can phone a few places to see if they have any jobs going. This may be a luxury weekend for Bell and Mac, but for her, there is just no such privilege. She needs to find a new job and fast.
That tip jar only has $80 in it and she has to get school supplies for Mac soon and then there is food and other things. So she needs to get a job as soon as possible. Holi stands and gathers Bell in her arms.
"Yes, that sounds fine. But no more junk food Austin," Holi turns to him with a hard stare, "Bell and I won't be here next weekend and I don't want her getting used to the idea of eating these extravagant meals."
Austin cocks his head and then looks over at Mac. They share a silent conversation, then Austin nods and looks back at Holi. She is suspicious.
"Mac take Bell and get her dressed," he says and Mac is quick to take Bell and scurry out of the kitchen, but not before she catches the guilty look on Mac's face. Holi's heart drops, she is not stupid. Part of surviving on the streets is keeping vigilant, and taking note of the small things. Mac has told Austin about Bell's birthday.
"I have questions Holi," Austin says with a serious face.
"And I have answers, so what?" Holi shoots back, it depends on what his questions are as to whether or not she will answer him, but there is something in Holi's gut that knows she will answer whatever he asks her. She is tired and she wants someone in her corner. It might be Austin and that scares the living shit out of her. she can feel her walls crumbling again.
Austin stares her down, just watching her like he is trying to work her out. He opens his mouth but then thinks better of it and stops whatever stupid question was bound to tumble out. He looks out the window to the pool area and Holi can practically hear the argument in his head.
"I have questions...lots of them. but, I won't ask them until you are ready to give me the answers Holi," he says. It scares Holi a little about how intune he is towards her. It's like he knows what she is thinking or he can sense when she is near. It's weird.
"Mac told me that it was Bell's birthday and that you would not be able to celebrate it. I would like to celebrate it," he looks back and locks eyes with her, "we will do it your way, no expensive gifts...just a cake, a hot bath, and a warm bed."
Holi scoffs, it's involuntary, but she is still not happy with his pathetic display of pity, "I don't want your fucking charity Austin. I will do something to celebrate her birthday. I can do it on my own. I don't need you...I don't need anyone," Austin pushes off the counter he was leaning on and stalks towards Holi with a scowl on his face. Holi is caught off guard and starts backing up then slams into the pillar, before she can sidestep Austin is on her.
He holds her against the pillar, not in a hurtful way, she knows if she pushes back he will back up but she allows him to crowd her against the pillar for now. He bends so he is at eye level with her, still scowling.
"You are so hard-headed it infuriates me, Holiday. It's not charity, it's kindness. I want nothing in return. There is no hidden agenda here. Just take what I am offering and be done," he has been leaning further and further in while talking and Holi knows that if she leans forward just an inch or two their lips would connect.
The thought makes her breath hitch. The action does not go unnoticed by Austin and his eyes flick down to her lips and then back to her eyes and he leans in a little more, "you intoxicate me," he whispers, his breath dances over her lips. She wants to kiss him, feel him...experience him. She leans in and can feel his lips brush hers.
"Bell!" Mac shouts as Bell comes running back into the kitchen. Austin is quick to take a step back and catch Bell as she launches herself at him, "no!" she shouts through tears and sobs. Holi takes a second to catch her breath and then assesses the situation. Mac looks frustrated and Bell looks devastated.
"What's going on Mac?" she asks, Mac shakes his head, "she refuses to take off those stupid lobster pajamas," Mac says. Bell shakes her head and curls her arms around Austin's neck, "mine," she says softly and Holi can practically see how Austin melts. It would be cute if this was a family setting, but it's not so whatever is happening between Bell and Austin is a big fucking problem.
"Leave her be Mac, there is a box full of them in the pool house. She can have all of them," Austin says.
"but they are pajamas Austin," Holi complains.
"Who cares Holi, only we know that. She likes them, let her wear them...please."
Mac is already walking back into the lounge and Holi knows how to pick her battles, this is a battle not worth fighting. Bell is cut from the same cloth as Holi and so she knows that it will take a miracle to get Bell out of those lobster pajamas. So she lets it be.
They leave for the stadium an hour later in a big black fancy car that has a new car seat in it just for Bell. When she had wanted to say something to Austin he just winked at her and shrugged his shoulders. It's not irritation that creeps up her spine but something remarkably similar to how she felt when he had her up against that pillar.
She needs to try harder at keeping her walls up because now she knows she will miss him when she leaves on Sunday and that is fucked up.
Once at the stadium they meet up with Ren in the stands while Austin goes to do whatever football players do in the change rooms. Holi makes a mental note to steal a book about football when she goes to the library then mentally slaps herself, she does not need that!
After about 15 minutes Austin and his team come onto the field all suited up and run around, Holi does not know what is going on but she finds it really hard to not look at Austin in those tight pants...his ass is out of this world.
"Want to pick your jaw up off the floor there girl?" Ren says while laughing, Holi snaps her mouth shut. Shit. She needs to get out of here and get on with her plan. "Shut it, Ren. Would you mind keeping an eye on Mac and Bell while I find a bathroom?" she asks and stands. Ren nods, "sure thing," he says.
Holi makes her way off the stands and goes looking for an office of some sort, there must be payphones near them for sure. After what feels like hours she finds an office, but no payphones anywhere. Shit, she needs to make a plan. Tomorrow is Sunday and she can't be without a job for much longer.
She takes a chance and steps into the office, it's big with huge framed football jerseys lining the walls. They all look similar to the frames that Austin has in his pool house she sees one with a picture of Austin in the corner and the number 28 printed on the back of his football jersey.
"Austin Post, a running back or more so the halfback for the LA charges," Holi jumps when she hears the silky voice behind her and spins around. She comes face to face with one of the most beautiful women she has ever seen. She is tall, slim, with straight blond hair, thick red lips, dark brown eyes, and a smile that is as fake as her breasts.
"oh, sorry did I disturb your drooling session?" she asks, her tone mocking.
"No I was looking for a bathroom and got lost," Holi answers, she does not know why because the woman is looking at her like she is bored and then rolls her eyes, "I don't care what you are doing here, but I would appreciate you not drooling over my boyfriend."
Holi's heart drops. Boyfriend? Of course, Austin has a girlfriend, she is so beautiful and looks like she matches Austin. She bets they look amazing together, "I was not. I have better things to do than to look at old men," Holi bites back and the woman frowns at her, "he is only twenty-five," she says.
Holi does not have time for this, she has to find a phone and get rid of this burning in the pit of her stomach that has formed ever since the word boyfriend was mentioned. So she turns to walk out the door, "do you not know who I am?" the woman asks.
Holi sighs and turns back to her, "you were very clear there, you are Austin's girlfriend...no need to repeat yourself. I am not stupid," she says. The woman looks offended, "you don't recognize me? I am Liza Carry."
The penny drops and Holi's eyes roll so far back in her head that she is sure she looks possessed. Fucking blood-sucking rich people. Liza is a model, one of those nasty ones. She has a pretty bad reputation. Liza is on nearly every billboard and fashion magazine in and around LA. Every woman wants to be her and every man wants to fuck her. Judging by the way she has just acted towards Holi now she is every bit the bitch the gossip columns say she is.
"I have never heard of Liza Carry. Guess you are just not that big of a deal," Holi says and leaves the office before Liza has a chance to answer her. She stalks back down towards the bleaches that she had left her siblings in and as she gets near the doorway she sees a payphone. Really? She has the worst fucking luck, honestly!
She pulls out a little black book she has and puts some quarters into the payphone that she had from the tip jar and dials the first number.
"Hello."
"Hey Jim, it's Holi."
"Holi! I was waiting for your call. I heard about what you did at the dinner."
"Yeah, well I need a new job. You got one for me?"
"Linda is my cousin, I can't give you a job. My wife will have my balls."
"Please Jim."
"OK. Phone Tim, he hates Linda so he is bound to give you a job just out of spite."
Holi hangs up on Jim and phones his brother Tim.
"Hello?"
"Tim, it's Holi. I need-"
"A Job? Yes. I will give you a job. I will give you anything you fucking want right now. You know that titty bar across from the gas station?"
"Yeah."
"Well be there at noon on Monday...and wear minimal clothing."
Then the line goes dead. It's a shit job, but it's a job, and truth be told she has done worse. She has limited job choices and needs to feed and clothe her siblings, it's been established that she would do anything for them.
Holi goes back to the bleaches only to find them abandoned, but then she sees that Mac and Bell are down on the field with Austin. He has Bell in her arms and his arm across a rather shy-looking Mac. He is introducing them to his teams mates and by the way, his chest is puffed out he looks proud to have the opportunity to show them off.
Holi's first instinct is to march down there and rip them away from him. How dare he use them as objects to show off his charitable side, but Austin's face looks so genuinely happy like there is no hidden agenda in his actions and Holi knows, she just knows, he is not showing them off to try and get people to like him but showing them off because he thinks they are awesome kids and thinks everyone would have a better life for just having a moment with them.
Holi is fucked. Two days with Austin and he has managed to sink into all three of the sibling's skin.
After a while, Austin looks up to the stands she is still in and shouts up to her that she must meet them in the parking lot. She is already out at the car when they appear at one of the entry doors and Liza is with them, Holi's heart drops but luckily she does not walk with them down to the car, but rather parts ways near the door.
They look so good together, Holi hates that the burning in the guts of her stomach starts up again. But it soon evaporates when she hears Mac talking to Austin excitedly about meeting the other players. He does not shut up, he continues to go on and on about how amazing the last two days have been, and even later that night when he flops down on the bed next to Bell he again goes on and on quietly to Holi about how amazing his time has been.
After the excitement from both Bell and Mac turn to exhaustion their eyes grow heavy and sleep pulls them under. Holi hopes that Mac will not slowly start to resent her for deciding now that she is going to give Mac and Bell one more weekend with Austin and then they will never see him again. It's for the best.
Sleep does not come as easy to her as it does to her siblings so she gets out of bed once she is sure they are asleep and wanders down to the kitchen. She sees the TV is on and that Austin is on the couch watching a football game. He turns his head to look at her when she walks in.
"I could not sleep, mind if I join you?" she asks, Austin nods and pats the seat next to him. She sits down and starts watching the game, she does not know what the fuck is going on. She hears Austin huff a little laugh and when she looks at him she sees he is looking at her with a grin.
"Do you even know what's going on Holi?"
Holi wants to kiss him.
"Not a clue, you are a running back right? What do you do?"
Austin pauses the game and turns to face Holi, "I am part of the running back yes. My position is a halfback. It's a pretty versatile position, but primarily I protect the quarterback or anyone else who has the ball."
Holi wants to feel him.
"So you are important to the team?"
Austin laughs again, it's a rumbling laugh. A laugh that starts from his belly and rumbles through his chest, it makes Holi feel warm.
"I am part of the team Holi, everyone is important. I can't play without my team and they can't play without me."
Holi wants to taste him.
"Do you get hurt?"
Austin nods, "yes I have been hurt, it comes with the game."
Holi does not know why, her body moves like it has a mind of its own. She slings her leg over Austin's lap and straddles him. In one fluid movement, Austin slides his hands up her sides and then cups her cheeks and pulls her down to him.
As he crushes their lips together goosebumps run rampant over her body and she has to will herself not to pass the fuck out. Austin's tongue darts out and runs along her bottom lip, asking for entry. She opens her mouth and when his soft tongue snakes into her mouth with dominance it feels like her insides are melting.
Austin has a specific way of touching her, it's domineering but not forceful. Her body is responsive to him like no other as if she was made for him to touch. She feels safe with him and the tenderness in his movements are not tarnished by his dominance
Holi lets him control the kiss, she submits to him, craving the lack of control and finding herself feeling proud when the sounds he makes indicate to her that he is happy with her and the way she gives in to him completely as he continues to lick into her mouth and kiss her.
Then as quickly as it started it stops. Austin picks her up and puts her on the couch then stands up and now he is looking at her with a guilty face.
"I am sorry Holi, I...you intoxicate me. I am sorry, I was out of line. I won't do that again."
Holi is hurt, the regret that is laced into his words stings her skin. Of course, he regrets it, he has a beautiful girlfriend and she is just a girl from the streets. She could never live up to his standards. Holi should regret it too, only she does not, she does not regret kissing him.
"It's nothing," Holi says standing up, she starts walking out then stops in the doorway, "thank you for being so nice to Mac and Bell, Austin. For what it's worth...I think you are a good man."