IF AERA HAD KNOWN exactly the kind of stress-wrinkle-inducing dilemma she had woken up to, she never would have brought a hand-fan to a fart fight (that was how the saying went, right?) In any case, she couldn't really take all the blame for that idiotic lack of insight. Whichever dense deity took a makeup wipe to her brain's recollection of the past week and dumped her on a school bus in the middle of nowhere with nothing but a handheld DIY AC system and an ugly Christmas sweater to defend herself had to be held responsible.
To solve her hair-rifling problems, Aera first indulged in her favorite hobby in the whole wide world: shopping. Though, wrinkling her nose at the collection of basic printed t-shirts in the gift shop could hardly be counted as shopping. She couldn't find any item worthy of being worn on her divinely ravishing body, but alas, the daughter of Aphrodite was a natural improviser. And improvise she did.
After convincing a wealthy tourist that it'd be the perfect idea to swap outfits, Aera exited the girl's bathroom, finally feeling like herself again. Now dressed in a trendy white blouse with a soft cardigan over a pleated skirt and a delicate pair of short-heeled, slingback heels, Aera had finished touching up her makeup to perfection and was fully ready to reign hell on whoever had put her in such a drab outfit in the first place.
Predictably, her debut out of the restroom immediately attracted tumults of attention. Even those near-sighted mortals appreciated beauty when they saw it. Aera was waving and smiling for all the commoners to ogle at when she heard a scream erupt from the far end of the hall. Normally, she could've cared less about mundane peasantry affairs, but everyone who was admiring her started to migrate towards the commotion.
Aera stomped her heels against the floor. Couldn't the universe let her have one good thing? Now that all the attention had been unjustly stolen from her, she had to go see what was more captivating than her pageant queen wave. This was her first mistake.
Her second mistake was pushing past the crowd swarmed at the door and almost over-ruffling her brushed hair in the chaos (she was so not used to long hair).
The kids from The Wilderness School were pounding on the glass, screaming and shouting like a bunch of ragtag barbarians, but the doors seemed to be stuck. When she got to the front row, Aera watched the most tediously unimpressive scene unfold through the glass.
Piper was the closest to the door, laying on the glass floor like Sleeping Beauty. For some unknown reason Aera didn't even want to try and probe at, her fingers were wrapped around a thick wooden branch with a bunch of leaves sticking out of it. She looked like she was ready to brain the first prince who tried to kiss her awake.
Then, Aera caught glimpse of Leo. He had been thrown off the railing and was hanging onto a thin ledge about fifty feet below. Coach Hedge must have been trying to save him, climbing down at rapid speeds with his goat feet out (gross!).
One of the jocks from the school bus—Ditch? Derek? Dexter?—whatever-his-name-was was leering at them all like a dollar tree Joker. He was flanked by two ghostly young men with smoky wings and eyes that flickered with lightning.
His current opponent was Jason. Aera had high expectations for this Jason, sensing that he was a powerful demigod when he resisted her charm. After what happened last summer, Aera knew better than to play with the heart of a strong half-blood.
Despite what the myths and hymns said, heroes weren't ideal lovers. Also too busy heroing to care about their loves. Aera had learned that the hard way last year. She figured her best option was to ghost this Jason before she got tangled in another sick ploy of her meddling mother, but she couldn't help but feel entranced as she watched him on the battlefield.
Jason clenched his fists. Before he could make his move, Daniel raised his arm and blasted him in the chest with arcs of electricity that ran between his fingers. Jason was sent flying, crashing to the ground on his back. The impact was so hard even Aera winced from afar. So much for a powerful demigod.
The odds weren't in any of their favors. Coach Hedge was still trying to reach Leo, but the little elf-looking guy looked pretty busted and about to plummet to his puny death. Piper rose to her feet, desperately swinging the club at the two other storm monsters, but they were just laughing and toying with her. The club went right through their bodies like they weren't there.
How disappointing, Aera thought from the safety of inside. Another three demigods bite the dust.
Oh, well. What could she do? This wasn't any of Aera's business. She had to worry about herself.
Whoever stole her memory and left her stranded here clearly had a grudge against her, (which didn't flesh out the list of potential suspects at all). The last thing Aera needed was three more necks to look out for. Her best bet at surviving whatever annoying thorns lied ahead was walking away. And that was exactly what she was going to do.
Bracing herself, Aera got ready to fend her wrinkle-free clothes from the mob of horrified bystanders with grabby hands when a blur of movement got hold of her attention.
Even though that lightning strike looked more than enough to send a couple men to Hades, Jason staggered to his feet, clothes smoking.
Aera couldn't hear what he was saying through the barricade of the doors and the howling wind outside, but David's form physically flickered with uncertainty. Jason seemed to tower over him like the mini hurricane around them didn't phase him at all. He reached in his pocket and pulled out a gold coin that shimmered.
Aera watched with incredulity as he intuitively flipped the coin in the air like he'd done it a thousand times. Jason caught it in his palm, and suddenly he was holding a sword—a wickedly sharp double-edged weapon that instantly made Aera jealous. The ridged grip fit his fingers perfectly, and the whole thing was gold—hilt, handle, and blade.
Aera let out a series of scoffs. If there was one thing she hated, it was being outdone. How dare he get back up like that when she already gave up on him? How dare he have a cool weapon?
"This won't do," she said to herself, shaking her head. "This won't do at all."
Before she could think twice about the dire consequences of leaving her long hair untreated, Aera brought her leg back and kicked the corner of the left door. The glass shattered and the noisy crowd around her lurched back in terror. The gale poured indoors. It was nearly strong enough to throw her off her feet, but Aera held her ground.
"Aera?" Isabel shrieked amongst the crowd. "What did you do?"
"Stay inside if you want to live," she declared theatrically.
Not waiting for a response, Aera stepped out onto the Grand Canyon Skywalk. Her earth-shattering entrance had caught the attention of every loser present, which was exactly what she intended. Pretending the thick raindrops didn't bother her, Aera strode forward unhurriedly, snapping open her bronze hand-fan.
"Seriously, guys?" she asked jadedly, fanning herself elegantly even though the storm was already blowing her hair in every possible direction. "I leave for five minutes and you're already losing this badly?"
"Aera!" Piper shrieked, club midair to a storm monster. "Where have you been?"
"Sorry," Aera apologized unapologetically. "I was too busy, not caring." Piper opened her mouth, but Aera wasn't done yet. "Due to an unfortunate turn of events, I have no choice but to show my face here."
Aera sent a wink to Piper, who gripped her club like she wanted to thwack Aera on the head.
"Are we supposed to be thanking you?" Jason grunted.
Aera appraised him. The lightning seemed to have gone straight through Jason's body and blasted off his left shoe. His toes were barbecued. The glass was stained a ripple of black soot around the area he stood.
"What a waste of a perfectly good lightning bolt." Aera sighed mournfully. "Now, I have to deal with you myself."
Jason tipped his gaze down at his golden sword as if he was trying to decide whether he should be relieved or threatened at her appearance. Aera wished he would try it. She hadn't fought a demigod in months, and his sword was looking like the perfect spoil of war to show off to whoever had thrown her into this dump.
Unfortunately, neither of them could arrive at a consensus in time because that's when the real problem jumped in.
"Aera Kim." The storm-fart thing shot her a brilliant white smile. "The infamously beautiful daughter of Aphrodite. Come to join the fun?"
Aera quirked a brow. "This is what you consider fun?"
"I'm glad I waited," the storm-fart thing resumed. "Leo and Piper I've known about for weeks. Could've killed them at any time. But my mistress said a special third and fourth were coming. She'll reward me greatly for their deaths, but you..." He sprouted black smoky wings and rose above the skywalk like that gaudy action was supposed to make her swoon. "You, I can spare."
"I'm flattered," Aera said lifelessly, "but that won't be necessary."
"No?" Damian purred. "Last I remembered, you preferred the company of those like me. You despise half-bloods, despite being one yourself. Or, have the winds of time changed your mind?"
"Not exactly," Aera drawled, distastefully eyeing Coach Hedge who was dumping a half-conscious Leo onto the Skywalk like a sack of flour.
"Spirits, fear me!" the old goat-man bellowed, making a big show of flexing his stubby arms.
Right on cue, Leo sprung to his feet and ran over to the railing to puke his guts out over the side. Jason grimaced and Piper hugged her stomach like she wanted to throw up, too. Coach Hedge had no choice but to linger back and watch over Leo, grumbling something about Leo skipping his daily intake of fiber and linen.
Aera tore her gaze away, exhaustively repulsed. She was going to need to deep cleanse her eyeballs after that little scene.
"Anyways," she said to Dimitri, "are you going to leave while I'm still feeling generous, or do you want to be embarrassed the whole way down to Tartarus?"
"You against us?" The storm monster's laugh sounded like a tornado tearing off a roof as his comrades gathered at his side. "Isn't that cute?"
His patronizing demeanor struck a chord in Aera's nerves, but she forced herself to remain calm. Jason was watching her closely, not to mention those three other twerps and half of that delinquent school. Even if she couldn't recall the last time she got a manicure, Aera was not about to humiliate herself in front of all of them.
"Oh, you're not afraid of me?" Aera's red lips curved in a smirk so cruel, it was sinister. "I guess I'm just far too pretty to be scary."
Aera leaped at the first storm monster.
He made it easy for her by thrusting his arms out to reach for her. Spinning around him, Aera flicked open her fan and sliced through his form with the edge of it.
Monster dust still falling, the second spirit let loose a bolt of lightning. Aera did a back flip out of the way, landing behind it. With one swift jab, the second storm monster dissolved into gold powder.
Piper was so stunned, she dropped her club. "Aera, what the...?"
"Curse it, glamour girl!" Coach Hedge snapped at Aera, pounding Leo on the back as he continued to vomit over the railing. "You aren't a team player. Why didn't you leave some for me? I like a challenge!"
Leo straightened, breathing hard. He looked completely humiliated, his hands bleeding from clawing at the rocks as he wiped his mouth. "Yo, Coach Supergoat, whatever you are—I just fell down the freaking Grand Canyon! Stop asking for challenges!"
Ignoring them, Aera tossed her hair over her shoulder and gifted Jason a dazzling smile. "Ready to thank me yet?"
Jason cocked his jaw. "You can't be serious."
Dallas snarled. Then something worse happened.
To Aera's ultimate horror, the pulverized monster dust began to gather, swirling into the air. The two ghostly men, whom she had watched disintegrated into the wind, somehow regained their original shapes in a matter of seconds. They appeared just the way they had before, as if Aera had never slain them.
"No way," she gasped. "I killed you!"
"Did you really think your flashy moves were enough to beat us?" Dylan sneered. "You've lost your sparkle, little girl. Now that you no longer possess the favor of the Titan Lord, your skills are insignificant, as is your life!"
Enraged, Aera lifted her fan, but Jason hefted his golden sword and intercepted her path.
"My turn," he told her.
Aera's brain short-circuited on the spot. "Excuse me?"
Without responding, Jason swung at the first spirit. It emitted another lightning bolt, but Jason blocked with his sword and the blade absorbed the charge. He stepped in with his sparking blade—one quick thrust, and the storm monster was ancient history. The second monster had no time to react as Jason's blade passed through it, and just like that, both storm monsters dissolved into gold powder.
Aera scoffed in disbelief. Their fights were practically the same, so why did he look so much more heroic doing it than she did?
Jason flourished his sword around in a fancy spin. "Ready to thank me yet?"
Aera had to make a conscious effort not to let her mouth drop. Who did this Johnny Bravo fellow think he was? Superman?
Dylan wailed in outrage. He looked down, expecting his comrades to re-form again, but this time, their remains dispersed in the wind. "Impossible! Who are you, half-blood?"
"Yeah, who are you, half-blood?" Aera demanded.
"You have no idea how many enemies you've awakened!" the storm-fart thing hissed. "My mistress will destroy all demigods. This is a war you cannot win."
Aera rolled her eyes. Like, she hadn't heard that one before.
Above them, the storm exploded into a full-force gale. Cracks expanded in the skywalk. Sheets of rain poured down. Aera was forced to lean on the railing to maintain her balance. A gaping hole opened in the clouds—a swirling vortex of black and silver.
"The mistress calls me back!" Dylan shouted with glee. "And you, demigod, will come with me!"
He tried to lunge at Piper, but Aera's natural battle instincts won over. In a flash of movement, she tackled the fart from behind before he could get close enough to the other girl.
Grabbing smoke was not an attractive idea, but Aera imagined her fists curled around the monster like tufts of fabric. She managed to vault onto his shoulders and snake her forearm around his neck in a tight headlock.
Thrashing, Dylan knocked away her bronze hand-fan as the two wrestled, gaining altitude into the air. Out of the corner of her eye, Aera saw the blurry figures of Piper, Leo, Jason, and the coach surging forward to help. Aera was going to tell them she had it covered because she was just that heroic when the spirit screamed with rage underneath her.
Dylan released an electric torrent that definitely singed off a few of Aera's precious eyebrow hairs. Aera felt the electricity to her bones, rattling her rib cage and spine, before she was thrown off his back. She fumbled, but there was nothing within reach to cling onto.
Aera tumbled down the side of the Grand Canyon Skywalk. In the distance, she could hear Piper's muffled screaming somewhere above her, but it already sounded so far away.
Aera wasn't scared of heights. She was scared of being smashed against the canyon floor five hundred feet below. Her body was so paralyzed in shock, she couldn't even scream.
That's it? she thought to herself. After everything I've been through, this is how I go? Death by a massive fart explosion?
Aera felt like the skin on her face was peeling off. Even though the sides of the canyon raced past her like a film on fast-forward, somehow time flowed unbearably slow. Perhaps it was the anticipation. It wouldn't be long before she hit the bottom of the Grand Canyon and that'd be the end of it.
As she dropped out of control, Aera pondered that maybe this was the fate she deserved for the last three years of her life. Ethan Nakamura's mother, Nemesis, the goddess of revenge, had once warned her she would eventually pay for her transgressions against not only the gods, but her own half-siblings. Maybe this was The Fates finally coming to collect her debt.
Then Aera felt a large mass collide into her body. They tackled her waist and brought her upright so that her back wasn't towards the earth anymore, her feet were. Suddenly the wind died. Aera wasn't falling anymore.
It took Aera a long, winding moment to collect herself enough to open her eyes. Jason's sky blue eyes were the first thing she saw. He was holding her close around the waist. Rather than plummeting, they were somehow floating midair, a hundred feet above a river. Something smelled like it was burning and Aera sincerely hoped it wasn't her.
The second Aera managed to gather her bearings, some twisted survival instinct kicked in and she threw her arms around Jason's neck for insurance. She choked out a mangled breath, her chest heaving uncontrollably. How were they alive?
"Are you OK?" Jason asked her. Aera could not believe him.
"Would you be OK after free-falling four-hundred feet?" she exclaimed, gasping for breath.
Jason considered her. They were positioned nose to nose. Finally, Aera could detect his heartbeat. His heart was pounding just as hard as hers through his clothes. Despite the raging winds, Aera could still feel his breath from this proximity. It was cold and minty, as if he had brushed his teeth right before going skydiving.
"Yeah..." Jason said slowly. "Yeah, we're OK."
"What did you..." Aera panted. "How did you...?"
"I didn't," he responded bitterly. "I think I would know if I could fly."
"Unless," Aera said with difficulty, "you really did lose your memory."
"So, you believe me now?"
"I believe," she answered harshly, "you need to get us out of here."
Surprisingly, Jason obliged. He raised his head and they shot a few feet higher. Aera couldn't subdue the scream that ripped from her throat this time. The pressure under her feet was so unstable, Aera tightened her hold around him and squeezed her eyes shut again.
As if it was supposed to reassure her, Jason said, "The air is supporting us." The air is supporting us?
Oh, he is so enjoying this, Aera realized furiously. If he wasn't the only thing keeping her insides from splattering over the bottom of the Grand Canyon like a bottle of spilled red nail polish, she would've throttled the guy already.
Still struggling with her breathing, Aera mustered a glare at her human elevator. "Sorry to pinch your wings, but can you pick up the pace? Get us out of here already!"
Jason tilted his head at her. "Don't you mean clip your wings?"
"Does it matter?" she snapped impatiently.
"Your heart is beating so fast," Jason pointed out, eyebrows furrowing together. "It's distracting."
It took every last drop of Aera's self-restraint not to strangle him. What ticked her off even more was how undisturbed Jason seemed to be of the scenario they were in, keeping his composure the whole time, while Aera couldn't even control her own heartbeat. Wait a second...that's right. Aera could control heartbeats.
Aera placed a hand over the left side of her chest. She imagined a vine of roses wrapping around her heart, reining it in. Its rhythm gradually subsided to a normal pace. A few thumps later, her heart was beating at a normal rate again.
"What did you do?" Jason questioned.
If Aera didn't know better, she might've thought he sounded curious. Under any other circumstance, the last self-hating crime she would've committed was extend her generosity to this wet sock of a boy, but she needed him to quit complaining. With grudging gentleness, Aera laid her hand over his heart.
"Don't move," she ordered as soon as he started shifting around under her touch.
Aera pictured the same thing with his heart, but with horse reins instead of rose vines. Eros knows she needed much stronger restraints if she was going to tame his heart. When Aera finished steadying his heart rate, Jason was staring at her with the heaviest, yet most unreadable expression on his face.
"What?" Aera asked severely, feeling self-conscious all of a sudden.
"Nothing," he replied after a brief pause. Aera could tell by the hesitation in his voice that he was deeply contemplating his words, almost as if he was having trouble believing them himself. "You just...remind me of a girl I used to know."
Before Aera could investigate, Jason looked up again and they shot skyward. Aera yelped. The fact that he was riding the winds might've been a little impressive any other day, but frankly, this was one of the worst days of Aera's life. Jason didn't make it any better by almost crashing them into the railing. Twice.
"Way to stick the landing," Aera criticized when they, by some miracle, made it back onto the skywalk in one piece. Jason didn't even reply. He shuffled to his feet and ran straight towards Leo and Piper.
Leo was still on the ground. Piper had turned him over. His army coat was soaked from the rain. His curly pig's tail hair glittered gold from rolling around in monster dust. At least he was still breathing.
"Stupid...ugly...goat," he muttered.
"Where is he?" Aera demanded.
Leo managed to lift his finger to the sky. The storm clouds didn't seem as bad, but they were still rumbling and flashing with lightning. "Never came down."
"Of course he didn't," Aera grumbled, rolling her eyes again.
It was just her luck that the satyr couldn't fulfill the one job he was hired to fulfill. Now Aera's hair was a mess, her clothes were drenched, and her skin was no doubt about to break out from the excessive moisture in the air. And she still didn't know who to blame for this royal disaster.
"Please tell me he didn't actually save my life," Leo complained, still on the floor.
"Twice," Jason clarified, helping him up.
"Well, thanks for not leaving me to die," Leo said weakly.
"Trust me," Aera muttered. "I tried."
Jason glared at her. "Aera."
"What?" she snapped. "Don't pretend you didn't have that thought too."
"Not helping."
"Thanks anyway." Leo groaned even louder as he got to his feet. "So what happened? The tornado guy, the gold sword, Aera's fan...I hit my head. That's it, right? I'm hallucinating?"
"If you were hallucinating, it wouldn't be this bad." Piper shivered in her rain-soaked clothes. Somehow her beauty remained irrefutable even in this ugly storm, her multi-colored eyes sparkling. Aera started to wonder if she had made a mistake by not registering her as an enemy.
"Gee, that makes me feel so much better, Piper," Leo said sarcastically. "Really appreciate it."
Piper made a sour face at him. Jason moved over and picked up his sword off the ground. He flipped the blade, and mid-spin, it shrank back into a gold coin that landed in his palm. Aera couldn't roll her eyes any more. Where were her flashy twin angel guns when she needed them?
Jason handed Aera her bronze hand-fan, which she didn't even see him pick up. "Here."
"So," Leo started, his restless eyes pacing back and forth between her and Jason, "just to be clear, what happened to those...tornado things?"
"Venti," Jason corrected. "Storm spirits."
Aera snapped her head at him. She was never an obnoxious know-it-all like that soul-sucker, Annabeth Chase, but even to her, that didn't sound right. "Pretty sure that's not what they're called."
"What do you call them then?" Jason demanded.
Aera paused. "Cosmic...farts." Aera answered. She raised her chin proudly. "Sounds better, doesn't it?" Piper shrugged while Leo raised his eyebrows, like that's the best you can do?
Jason crossed his arms. "You just made that up."
"Oh, yeah?" she challenged, stepping forward. "What if I did? What are you gonna do about it, Peter Pan?"
"OK!" Piper got in between their glaring contest before Aera could get her hands on that blond oaf. "Name debate aside...you two act like you've seen them before. Who are you?"
Jason shook his thick skull. "That's what I've been trying to tell you. I don't know."
Aera could not have rolled her eyes harder. "I do. You're a demigod. We're all demigods. Jason's just an extremely dense demigod." He lowered a glower upon her, but then Leo made another stupid comment.
"Don't know what demi means," Leo interjected. "But I'm not feeling too godly. You guys feeling godly?"
There was a brittle sound like makeup palettes breaking, and the cracks in the skywalk began to lengthen. The other kids from the Wilderness School were still staring out shattered glass threshold in horror. Security guards were rushing around to try and herd them away from the Skywalk. They wouldn't be occupied for long.
"We need to get off this thing," Jason asserted, ever the captain obvious. "Maybe if we—"
"Ohhh-kay," Leo interrupted. "Look up and tell me if those are flying horses."
Incredulously, Aera lifted her head and saw a dark shape descending from the east—too slow for a plane, too large for a bird. As it got closer she could spot a pair of winged animals—gray, four-legged pegasi. They were pulling a brightly painted chariot with two large wheels that Aera could recognize even from afar.
"Oh, goodie," she remarked sardonically after realizing what rat's nest that chariot belonged to. "Campers. Just what we need."