"Hey Tonya, can you send these samples to the lab for me", I asked.
"Sure thing", she said.
"Doctor Ivanov, I need you right now", a nurse called out.
I ran over to a room where a patient stopped breathing.
"I-I don't know what to do...this is the first time this happened and-"
"You do know what to do, that's why you are here. Just take a deep breath, relax and think."
She did just that.
"I need to get him breathing again", she said
"Right."
As much as it sucks not to intervene, I want my team to know what to do. I only jump in if necessary.
"Make sure you get the tube in the right place", I said.
"Down the wrong pipe is what we want", she said.
I taught that trick to anyone who forgets since we all had food go down our windpipe at least once in our life.
"I think I got it...I know I did."
We both looked at the monitors, they stopped beeping.
"He is stabilizing. Great work. Make sure you check on what happened and keep a close eye on him", I instructed.
"Yes Dr. Ivanov. Thank you so much!"
I placed my hand on her shoulder.
"You have to believe in yourself more Krissy. I don't choose just anyone to work under me."
"I learn from the best."
As I left the room I let out a sigh. I've been through a lot of emergencies but they still get my heart racing. I'm glad my shift is over though.
As I headed to Clara's room I stopped when I saw a few nurses rush in. I ran over to see what was going on. She was seizing.
"What happened?"
"She was fine, just talking to me and all of a sudden she started having a seizure."
I rushed to the side of her bed. The nurses made it safe for her by removing anything that could hurt her.
"She has no record of seizures", I said.
I heard a nurse say something but it sounded far away. I was focused on Clara. I never felt so scared for a patient. We are taught to stay calm during emergencies but in this case, I could feel my heart racing because it was Clara.
I wanted to reach out to her but I knew I couldn't touch her. Luckily the seizure passed quickly. As it wore down she came to, she looked so scared. I couldn't help it. I reached out to her, my hand gently rubbing her head.
"I'm here, it's okay. Just try to calm down, okay", I said softly.
"Doctor should we get the CT scan ready", a nurse asked.
"Yes please."
As they went to do that, we were left alone.
"Dimitri..."
"Yes...I'm here."
"What...what happened?"
"You had a seizure but you came through it well. We are going to check your brain to see what happened, okay?"
"Don't leave me please", she said desperately.
"I won't, I promise. I'll be right by your side, okay?"
Once in the CT scan, we check every area of her brain.
"Anything sticks out to you Paula", I asked.
She's the lead CT technician.
"Just some activity from the seizure but I don't see anything here that would have caused it."
"Damn it! Then it has to be from her mystery illness."
"If this is a new side effect...it's getting worse Dimitri. I'm sorry..."
"I don't want to tell her that."
"I wouldn't either. I will look it over some more. I will let you know if anything sticks out."
"Thanks a lot Paula."
When I left the room I was feeling a mix of emotions. Most of all, I felt like a failure, just like the time when I was losing my dad.
~
I woke up early in the morning, it was still dark out. I must have fallen asleep. I looked over to see Clara was awake.
"What's wrong", I asked.
"Nothing. I'm just tired of sleeping. I feel like I've been sleeping all day."
"You need the rest."
"It looks like you need it more than me. Sleeping in a chair must be uncomfortable. You can have my bed, I can sit in the chair, I don't feel tired."
"No. I can't take a patient's bed Clara and I will not have you sit in a chair, you aren't feeling well."
I smiled a little. She is a very thoughtful person even though she is so sick.
"Then um...you can share with me. I see it in movies people do that so it's probably a thing."
I chuckled.
"It is a thing but-"
I stopped what I wanted to say when I noticed her shyness. Her face was turning red. I want to do anything I can to make her feel better but I know I can't do this. Saying no feels wrong though. After a moment of debating with myself, I stood up.
"I'm not supposed to be doing this Clara", I said as I walked around to the other side of the bed.
"But you're so tired. It's okay, you don't have to. I don't want you to get in trouble, it was stupid of me."
"It wasn't stupid. You're just very sweet. You can't help it."
She looked away shyly.
"Besides, I already told the staff I will be watching you. I told them not to disturb you so they won't be coming in to check until morning."
I lift up the covers and slid in next to her. She moved over a little to make room for me.
"That's good then", she said.
"Are you comfortable", I asked."
"Yes. I think I shall count this as my first sleepover."
I chuckled. "You never had a sleepover?"
"No. My mom didn't allow it, she doesn't trust people and she didn't want anyone over at our house."
"She sounds like a downer...no offense."
"I know what you mean. She's not...fun. She just told me she does what she does to keep me safe."
"I saw her down on your emergency contact, you still live with her?"
"All my life."
"Oh. Did you go to school or work?"
"No...my mom homeschooled me and she said college is just a big scam. When it comes to work, she said I didn't need to since I live with her. I was curious about working and so I went out one day without telling her. She got so mad, she said something could have happened to me. I wanted to prove to her that I was okay but before I could do that I got sick..."
The sad tone of her voice caused me to look at her. Her eyes searched the ceiling as if she was imagining what her life would have been like if she made it out there on her own. I did not want that to just be a dream, I want to make it a reality.
"Hey", I said.
She looked at me.
"I promise I will get you out of here. I have to disagree with your mom about college, it's not a scam if you get into the right field. If it was a scam, why am I so good?"
She giggled.
"I thought about college. I really like teaching people things, especially children. When my mom would let me play outside when I was a kid, I would play with the neighbor's little kids and I loved teaching them about the little bugs in the yard. I loved the look on their faces."
"I think you would be a wonderful teacher."
She blushed a little.
"Thanks."
"Now tell me about these bugs."
"You really want to know?"
"Why not", I said with a shrug.
"Okay."
I closed my eyes and listen to her as she excitedly talked about the different kinds of bugs she came across along with the ones she would like to see. Her voice is so relaxing, I eventually drifted off to sleep.
~
"Dimitri...Dimitri?
My body was being rocked. I quickly sat up and looked at Clara.
"What's wrong? Are you okay", I asked as I looked her over.
"I'm fine. You said you needed to get up since a nurse will come soon. I wanted to make sure you were up early."
"Oh yeah. Thank you."
I got out of bed.
"Did you sleep okay", I asked.
"Yes, did you?"
"I did, thank you for sharing your bed."
"Anytime."
"Um...okay I guess I should check some things since I'm here first. Now, where's-"
"Clipboard is on the chair."
"Right. Sorry, I don't think well when I just wake up."
"I think it's cute...I-I mean..no! Like...uh..."
I laughed at her nervousness.
"You meant what you said did you not?"
She got quiet. I crossed the line.
"I-I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. I'll have some tests ordered for you and some breakfast of course. I will be back later."
I started to head out.
"Dimitri?"
I stopped and turned to look at her.
"Yes?"
"Will you kiss me?"