"all the things i feel when i'm with you."
(i'm so sorry to interrupt, but i just have to say that this is my favorite gif of loki, and everytime i look at it, i get butterflies and my brain just goes: sjfbfjsbfjshdb)
loki's pov!
smooth arms weaved their way around my body, hugging me tighter, holding me closer.
i could tell from the soft breathing that it was belle, and her head resting on my chest almost seemed like a familiar thing. she nuzzled further, sighing contently, her damp hair from her shower clinging to her neck without a care.
i kept my eyes close, but moved one of my hands to rest on her back, giving a small hint that i wasn't exactly asleep.
what made me open my eyes was when she started trailing kisses softly and carefully on my collarbone, right above the hem of my shirt. it was a rare gesture that came from her.
"love?", i whispered to her and she looked up, her brown eyes finding mine.
"hi.", she said with a dazzling grin, "i want to show you something i got earlier today."
her hand reached up, and a bouquet of orange chrysanthemums floated to her hands.
"i happened to stop by the florist shop, you know the one just a few stores away from the cafe?", she said and i nodded gently, as she continued, " yeah, i went there on my way home. and did you know that chrysanthemums are pretty known fall flowers? something quite fitting for mid-november hm?"
"chrysanthemums can mean a lot of things in different places in the world, they can mean devoted love and joy, sometimes comfort and grief, other times hope for someone to get well soon," she trailed off slowly, "but orange ones, as far as i know, mean mostly good things."
"most of the good feelings like happiness, excitement, enthusiasm, passion.", she said delicately touching one of the petals, "all the things i feel when i'm with you."
i sat up a bit, as she placed the bouquet in my hands.
heat rose up to my cheeks as i stared down at the flowers in my hand, "you got them for me?"
from the corner of my eyes, i saw her nodding and doing that nervous tick of hers, the one where she tugs on the sleeves of her clothing, which in this case is the sleeves of her dark brown sweater.
"i had the sudden urge to give you flowers."
"i- i don't know what to say.", i whispered quietly, "no one has thought to do something like this for me, because-"
because it's usually the man giving the woman flowers. not the other way around.
she rested one hand on my arm comfortingly, "well, i'm sure it's about time this should be done more, don't you think?"
i looked up, taken aback.
she didn't notice my surprise and continued, "what would you like next? peonies, or roses, or some other flower i've never heard of that you might know? which there probably is a lot since you're really smart when it comes to flowers..."
there was this fluttery feeling in my heart and i found that her voice got muffled the longer i stared at her. then, impulsely, i blurted out the first thing that came to my mind, "stars, you're so perfect."
she stopped talking and her head lowered as she went back to focusing on her sleeves again. it took me a while to realise that she was trying to hide her smile.
she popped back in the living room a few hours later, holding a bowl in her hands, "do you like mangoes? these things are delicious this time of year."
she sat back down next to me, and used the fork to poke one of the small pieces and held it up, "open wide~"
a laugh came out of my lips. as i opened my mouth, she fed me that piece of fruit. i chewed, taking an intentionally long time to do so, as she eagerly waited for my reaction.
"it's really sweet.", i pretended to say in a thoughtful manner, "i think.. i might need to try it twice to settle on my decision."
she pulled the bowl back, smiling, "ah ah, tell me if you like it or not first!"
"i told you, i need to try another.", i argued playfully, but she just shook her head stubbornly, "not a good enough answer."
"love."
"darling.", she countered back, "admit it! you like it, don't you?"
"maybe i do."
"well then maybe i'll eat the rest of this until you proclaim your love for mangoes to me. because i can't trust you if you don't like mangoes, seeing as these mangoes are even better than...than the apples you made me eat back in asgard."
"but those apples taste amazing.", i complained and she shrugged, plopping a piece into her mouth and chewed.
"mmm tasty.", she noted, "and very, very delicious."
i cocked my eyebrow at that and made a move to grab the bowl which she levitated in the air out of my reach.
"it's so good, why won't you just admit it already, lok-", she rambled and i took it as a chance to kiss her, tasting the mango from her lips.
"yes, i like mangoes very much.", i said with a grin, once we parted from the kiss.
she grinned back, almost hazily from the kiss, "see, i knew it."
she continued to feed me the pieces of that mango, as she hummed absently.
"you've been awfully affectionate today.", i stated suddenly, making her stop humming and look at me surprised.
"you noticed?", she breathed out, "not so subtle, belle."
"i don't mind.", i quickly added before any other discouraging thought coated over her, "i was just wondering why?"
she twirled the fork while averting her gaze away from me. she sighed before saying, "i don't want you to feel like this relationship is one-sided."
i blinked at her disbelievingly, "sorry, what?"
she rushed talking after that, "i just- i don't want it to be one of those relationships where the guy does everything for the girl- the girl being spoiled everytime and it always looks like the man is the only one falling in love, i never, never want you to feel that way."
"that's why you've been doing the most between us two lately.", i said, "the date, the taking care of me when i'm sick, the park, everything, you've been putting yourself out for me. love, you know that wasn't necessary."
"yes, of course i know!", she said extending her arms unconsciously, then upon realisation, she promptly dropped them, "i didn't want to prove a point in breaking some sort of cliché. i just don't want you out of all people to do all the hard work for me, as you've done plenty of times back at the palace. i wanted to show, to express that i care for you, i love you in ways other than just saying it, because saying it will never be enough to explain what i feel to you."
"i don't want you to feel...trapped with me just because i did one kind thing in the beginning.", she muttered, "and maybe, maybe a small part of me is doing it because.."
"..i want to prove that i am worthy after all to be loved by you.", she said closing her eyes, knitting her eyebrows together as she said those words.
she was shaking, i realised, trembling in shame at admitting that.
i scooted closer to her and pulled her in a hug, "belle, you're more than worthy to be loved by anyone, including me. this relationship was never one-sided, love, i know that. you've done so many countless things that mean so very much to me."
"and you know," i said, rubbing small circles on her back, "in the first few weeks after we arrived in midgard, i was actually afraid that you'd feel trapped in a relationship with me. i never want you to feel that way either."
"really?", she whimpered quietly, "you're not just saying that?"
"i mean every word, darling. i love you immensely.", i said slowly, "and you don't need to do a thing to prove it to me, i know you love me too."
"i'm sorry.", she whispered.
"never apologise to me for that. i'm glad you told me.", i said kissing her forehead.
she smiled back, but i could feel the waves of uncertainty still linger in her expression.
"how about this," i said tucking a strand of her short brown hair behind her ear, "you and i take turns doing sweet things for each other, alright? there will be no pressure whatsoever, so that the both of us won't feel trapped or forced."
she nodded agreeing, "thank you."
"whatever for?"
"being patient with me.", she said simply, "and i'll try to do the same to you as you have been to me."
i hummed quietly, continuing to stroke her back gently.
"one last thing.", i said, breaking the silence.
she looked up at me expectantly.
"i'm overcome with the sudden need to try those mangoes again. so is it okay if i kiss you again?"
she laughed warmly, the sound of it making my heart beat faster.
author's note:
i thought this was somewhat angst but my friend said it wasn't because it ended nice, and it made her all fuzzy inside so i decided to keep it.
belle's a bit new to this whole relationship thing, and well even though loki is probably more experienced, he hasn't truly felt love deeply like this either.
what i had in mind, was showing that belle had insecurities about herself that may have affected how she acted in the relationship, something that i think applies to many couples in real life. eventually, she opens up about it, effectively making the two of them talk it out and find a current solution to it.
in my opinion, i feel like that was the right course of action, confiding in each other and trying to solve something together, because we're all in this togethER!
no i'm kidding i mean, it's because in a romantic relationship, the two people should support each other and continue to work out the flaws in their relationship, and eventually accept each other<33
i'm so good at giving advice over something i have never experienced- *sad author noises*
last thing BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY, SINCE IT'S DEC 17 WHERE I'M AT,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOKI, I KNOW YOU'RE JUST A FICTIONAL CHARACTER BUT I ABSOLUTELY ADORE YOU, AND I'M SO PROUD OF YOU! KEEP YOUR HEAD UP ALWAYS, YOU KING, AND THANKS SO MUCH FOR BEING THE DAGGER TO MY HEART (yes, out of context that sounded pretty murderous but let me be), I HOPE YOU'RE OUT THERE SOMEWHERE AND SPENDING TIME WITH YOUR BROTHER AND THOSE YOU LOVE, AND HAVING A GREAT TIME! CHEERS TO ANOTHER YEAR IN YOUR SUPER LONG LIFE<33