[ new chat! ]
9:34am
harriet: I MADE TWO (2) NEW FRIENDS
newt: Name, address and postal code?
newt: I need to offer my condolences, as well as some flowers and chocolates to soften the blow of the upcoming insanity and decreasing amount of brain cells it takes to be friends with you.
brenda: jesus, what crawled up your ass this morning?
newt: Minho did.
brenda: oh
brenda: OH-
minho: IT WASNT LIKE THAT
minho: newt just seemed sad so i thought we should cuddle during the night to make him feel less sad
sonya: what made you think he was sad?
minho: he had an expression that was like -_-
sonya: oh no, that's just his face, you'll get used to it
sonya: newt doesn't have a concept of human emotions
minho: well either way, he did not like my cuddling.
newt: Maybe, because you shoved yourself into my bed at two o'clock in the morning and pet my hair until I woke up in a panic, thinking someone broke it and was trying to peacefully murder me.
teresa: how does one 'peacefully murder'?
newt: Harriet does it all the time.
harriet: YOU LOVE IT WHEN I CUDDLE YOU
newt: When I'm conscious.
minho: FINE
minho: no more middle of the night cuddles for you then
harriet: can we get back to me now?
thomas: what friends did you make harriet?
harriet: my new galpal gally, and this kid in my class frypan!!
harriet added frypan & gally to the chat!
newt: Welcome to your own personal hell.
gally: ah shit
gally: if it's my own personal hell does that mean troy bolton is here?
teresa: yeah he is, except he's 6'0 and cares way too much about his hair
minho: i am not troy bolton in re-carnation.
teresa: whatever you tell yourself to get to sleep at night.
alby: can y'all not?? i'm in class!
harriet: ...
harriet: no i think i will, thank you, alby.
[ minho & newt ]
10:02am
minho: hey newtie patootie
newt: just block me please
minho: can i borrow your shower gel??? i think i forgot mine
newt: Sure.
minho changed newt's name to newtie patootie
minho: did it hurt when you fell?
newtie patootie: Are you making fun of my limp?
minho: when you fell from heaven and into thomas' arms?
newt patootie: Are you hitting on me? For Thomas?
minho: you should take him out for dinner sometime 😉
[ wlw & mlm solidarity ]
10:12am
sirius blacks slut: Minho just hit on me. For Thomas.
marlene mckinnons whore: REALLY OMG
marlene mckinnons whore: maybe i should hit on thomas for you!!!
sirius blacks slut: But I'm not into Thomas like that.
marlene mckinnons whore: oh you're such a liar. you basically were drooling over him the other day when we met teresa for coffee.
marlene mckinnons whore: by the way to do u like my new roommate?
sirius blacks slut: Yeah she seems great, why?
marlene mckinnons whore: bc she colour coordinated my closet this morning.
marlene mckinnons whore: and i'm not saying that i don't appreciate it
marlene mckinnons whore: but i prefer to have a big pile in my closet so that when i'm getting ready in the morning i can sit in the pile and pick out what i want.
marlene mckinnons whore: now i'm gonna have to stand and find everything easier and i will no longer be able to make an entrance by being late everywhere.
sirius blacks slut: Poor you.
[ new chat! ]
5:26pm
harriet: is it too late for me to tell you guys that there's a party tonight at xiemas and she wants us all the come?
newt: Who is Xiema?
harriet: my new friend, newt, keep up.
thomas: is there alcoholic substances?
harriet: i believe so yes.
thomas: i'll be there.
teresa: thomas, you're a whore for some pink whitney.
thomas: smd
frypan: oh i love xiema! she's so sweet.
frypan: i'll come to her party
brenda: any chance to get drunk on a tuesday night.
sonya: that's unhealthy, but my presence will be expected there
newt: It's a Tuesday?
harriet: newt please come out of your cave every once in a while, you bat.
newt: Bite me.
sonya: yuck, rabies
minho: is xiema hot?
harriet: obviously
harriet: she could have her way with me if she wanted to
minho: i'll be there
teresa: i mean i was going to go but now that i know minho's going i might have to rethink my decision
minho: why? because my looks are just ever so tempting to you, t-money?
minho: and with alcohol you just might not be able to control yourself around my perfectly crafted face, rock hard abs and perfectly styled hair😙
teresa: sorry guys i can't make it, i just vomited all over the carpet at the thought of minho's flat stomach
minho: ROCK. HARD. ABS.
thomas: shut up or get a room.
thomas: what time is the partayyyy
harriet: nine o'clock
harriet: and xiema lives off campus so i'll send you her address in a bit.
thomas: thanks boo😘
harriet: anytime honey pie🥰
newt: I think I might have to stay in with Teresa because that interaction made me want to vomit all over her carpet.
teresa: i'll leave a space on the carpet for you to hurl your entire digestive system, newtie<33
***
[ new chat ]
9:32am
brenda: @harriet i am so mad at you right now
brenda: you can't see me, but i'm seething with bitter rage.
harriet: glad to know i make you this horny<333
newt: you disgust me.
thomas: please i beg of you all
thomas: JUST SHUT UP
teresa: how's that hangover there, tom?
thomas: i'll venmo each of you $20 if you will shut up.
sonya: tbh i'm surprised thomas is even alive.
harriet: fr mans was SO drunk last night.
sonya: i watched him down like 10 shots, throw up, and then down like 5 more.
sonya: i was honestly so impressed.
minho: the drinking habits of thomas: a guide to getting sonya horny
sonya: yep sounds about right.
teresa: well then, we know thomas is on his death bed
teresa: how's everyone else?
thomas: are you trying to skip past my pain and agony?
teresa: yep!!
brenda: does anyone have a hammer?
brenda: follow up question, will anyone beat my head in with it?
teresa: yes and yes<3
brenda: t, stop ur giving me butterflies🥰🥰
alby: i'm glad i didn't drink.
newt: shut up
alby: hey! i warned you, newt!
gally: @frypan you alive? we haven't heard from u yet
frypan: no
sonya: i figured yeah.
harriet: i'm going out for coffee and an omelette at that coffee place and i'm dragging newt with me
harriet: anyone want to join us?
newt: I did not agree to this.
harriet: shut ur yapping
thomas: i need caffeine
thomas: but i can't fathom getting out of bed
teresa: ur so dramatic, i'll get minho to come down to ur dorm and drag you out of bed if i have to
minho: no thx
minho: newtie pie was stocked with tylenol AND advil
minho: so i think i'm gonna snuggle with him all morning as a thank you
newt: Harriet, I was lying I do want to come get an omelette with you.
harriet: good, bc i'm almost at ur dorm
harriet: whoever is coming, meet at wicked beans
teresa: mhm their coffee is so good
teresa: i applied for a job there just for the coffee
thomas: i'm coming.
thomas: my roommate just woke up and he's terrifying
sonya: who ben? he's a sweetie pie
minho: LMAO BEN?????
minho: sonya's right he is a nice guy, but thomas is my man... so
minho: i'll beat him up for you, babe😘😘😘
thomas: glad to know someone's on my side
thomas: SOMEONE cares for me
thomas: SOMEONE LOVES ME
minho: do u need a minute or?
teresa: quit ur whining. everyone go to wicked beans, harriet wants her eggs and i'm gonna make sure my lady gets them.
harriet: thank you t-zilla, love you xxxxxxxx