“Do not lose hope, nor be sad.” Quran 3:139
KHALID MIRZA P.O.V
" Yo- you are right " she slightly pushed my chest to maintain distance , it felt like my closeness was suffocating her , she is not meeting my eyes anymore ". I am so sorry that I misinterpreted and you are stuck with me but I promise I am not a burden to you " I felt like I just broke something inside her which is piercing my heart now " you can leave me whenever you want " she struggled to keep her voice straight .
" But it's a request please don't disrespect my father " with which she ran away from my room leaving me stunned .
" DAMMIT !" I punch the wall in anger .
"But I didn't say anything wrong " I tried to defend myself by taking my hand through my hair feeling frustrated .
" I am stuck with her "
Are you ??
" She is not even beautiful "
Liar !!
" I never wanted to marry her in first place "
Liar !!
" DAMMIT !" I punched the wall in anger again and again until blood stained the wall .
How long you are going to lie to yourself my subconscious mind confronts me .
You wanted to marry her the moment you set your eyes on her, remember??
Flash back
My black Mercedes Benz car stopped a few distance from the red light , black glass rolled down revealing my hand from the window holding a cigarette between my two fingers .
Taking off my shady blue google's, my eyes saw two poor kids carving gaze at the small stall of food . Their torn clothes are enough to tell their painful story . Anger overwhelmed my chest, remembering a glimpse of my past .
I looked away clenching my fist , the red light turned green, signalling my car to move ahead , holding my gear in tight grip. I was about to start my car when I found those poor kids again but this time they weren't alone .
A woman wearing a blue loose abaya covering her from head to toe kneeling in front of those kids who had a smile on their innocent faces .
Look away !!!
My subconscious warned myself but like always I ignored and stared at the lady . I cannot see her face except her dark black eyes .
Holding both the kids hand firmly , she crossed the road looking right to left in between passing in front of my car. Curious of what she is going to do next , I lean forward to have a better view of them .
The abaya girl brought two plates filled with food placed in front of those hungry kids . Watching the food a bright smile appear on the faces of poor kid like they posses the power to brighten the day .
Watching her kind act unconsciously my lip twitch , a warm feeling replaced the overwhelming anger in my heart . Suddenly the girl's eyes met my dark sea green eyes. My heart skipped a beat for the first time but she forbade me . She looks too righteous . I saw something in her eyes that held disappointment , disgust , realisation hit when my eyes followed her .
Cigarettes ....
Lowering my both eyes in grimace , I felt offended . She judges me like everyone else .
I intentionally puff one last time in front of her before throwing cigarettes on the ground .Rolling up the black glass feeling angrier than before , I zoom past the car from mud splashing all over her dress .
I heard her shrieked , a satisfying smile a appear on my leaving .
I was driving away from her but something made my heart go back over there again. The kids were gone but the girl was walking hurriedly on the side of the road . I started driving slowly far from her knowledge as I kept following her , I have no idea why I was following her . I have never done something cheap like this before , I know how wrong it is to follow women but my desire was too strong then my emaan ( faith ) .
She turned to the left , opened a small iron gate , and entered, bending down , and she was greeted by a white cat . My breath hitched as she opened her veil to kiss the cat revealing her beautiful yet the most innocent face I have ever seen . I won't say that she is most beautiful but yet her innocence made my heart feel crazy like I wanted her , all of a sudden I was craving for her yet I knew it was wrong , men like me aren't made for women like her yet some voice whispering evil things in my mind . There was no layer of makeup yet she took my breath away . Slowly the iron gate started to close making her face disappear much to my disappointment .
My eyes fell on the nameplate on the front wall as I tilled my head with an evil smirk on my face .
" Zubair Sultan "
" Stop it Khalid .... " I bare my teeth feeling angrier than before .
" WHY CAN'T I JUST LET STOP THINKING ABOUT HER ALL THE TIME " I took a hold of a vase throwing around the room smashing into pieces .
" She is too good for me " I whispered feeling disgusted on myself .
" I don't deserve her " I shook my head .
I look at my palm feeling disgusted " if I touch her , she will be dirty "
" She is too pure for me "
" I will never let her burn in my fire " I promise myself determined .
" Never " .......
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Okay.... Another updated ...
Khalid p.o.v about Amira finally...
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Comment down below , what do you think about Khalid insecurity .