.
Louis
"Louis, I didn't do anything!"
"Stop it." I mutter, trying to contain my frustration, "Stop it, Eleanor. I already know you did something - you told her something or whatever."
She shifts her weight, "So what?"
I furrow my eyebrows, "What did you tell her?"
Eleanor shrugs and avoids my eyes, "Nothing, just small talk."
"What kind of small talk? And don't play me."
She sighs and her stance softens, "I just told her that I was your girlfriend, not her - I told her the truth."
I close my eyes and take a deep breath, "The entire truth?"
"Yea." She says, barely over a whisper.
"Your the reason she found out, aren't you?"
She quickly speaks up, "It can't just be me. The fans must've told her-"
"But your one of the people who actually knew about it!" I practically shout, "Whatever the fans say are mostly rumors, but you actually knew what was happened and your the only one who told her. Like, the only person to blame here is you!"
She walks up to me, "Louis, I only did this for us."
I step back, "Us? Us? Eleanor, there is no us. We went through this, we are not a couple anymore."
She chuckles but eyes soften, "Louis, your talking nonsense."
"No, I mean it." I state through my gritted teeth, "Whatever's going on in your mind is wrong, because the only person who I really loved is Jessica. So, whatever we were before, it's over and it should've been over a long time ago."
With that, I walk out of her flat without another word - ignoring how many times she's cursing at me or calling me back.
From now on, I'm doing things the way I want to, no matter what anybody else tells me. I'm going to make things right and in the right way.
.
Jessica
"Ow!" I exclaim as I almost trip for the fourth time over my cast.
"Ooh, sorry, sorry, sorry!" Skylar shrieks and helps me up the stairs.
I sigh and try my best to make it up the stairs, but it's hard with a 20 pound cast and two gigantic crutches.
Thankfully, Skylar has been with me ever since the day I got my cast and helped me with almost everything. I couldn't be more grateful because right now, I would be tumbling down the stairs without her.
We finally make it into my bedroom and I exhaustedly jump into bed. Even though I literally just mumbled around the house for the past days, I'm always tired out.
"Ugh, I feel poopy." I moan and lay on my bed with my legs hanging.
"Aw, what's the matter babe?" She says and logs onto my laptop.
"I don't know. I feel sleepy, but I don't want to sleep. It's like there a wall in my head that's blocking my energy."
"Well, ok then. I don't really know what to say to that, but the internet says that it could be from lack of sleep, food, or it could come from stress." She says and reads the screen.
I scoff, "It's definitely not from the food or sleep."
"Then is it stress?" Skylar inquires and looks at me.
I think about it, "Maybe."
Skylar sighs and pats my knee, "I'm sorry Jess, all the stress is coming from that prissy asshole."
I chuckle, "Damn, it sounds like you hate him more than me."
"That might be true." She says and laughs with me.
For the sixth day in a row, Skylar and I hang out in my room just playing around. We didn't complain one bit while we did the most randomest things to keep us busy. This is why I love Skylar, she's always by my side and can make any situation better.
A couple hours later, my mom announces that we should have dinner. Luckily for me - in this case, me and Skylar - my dinner is brought to me, since my family noticed my struggle of traveling by stairs.
Soon, my mom comes through the door with two stuffed plates in her hands. She places one plate on my lap and one on the desk that Skylar is sitting at.
"Thanks, mom." I say and looks down at my food.
"Yea, thanks Mrs. Branson. Looks awesome." Skylar sings.
She giggles, "No problem, my pleasure. Oh - and Jessica, you left your phone downstairs. It kept going off nonstop, you need to put that on vibrate, girl!"
I stuff a chunk of chicken in my mouth and retrieve my phone from her hands. Once my mom leaves, I immediately check my texts and voicemail. My texts are pretty much empty, but my voicemail is blowing up.
An unknown number keeps popping up at the voicemail and I get a tad worried. Trying to keep calm, I privately listen to the messages without Skylar eavesdropping.
Suddenly, that one voice comes through my phone and instantly makes me go numb through every voicemail.
"Hey Jessica, uh, I don't know where I'm really going with this... So yea, just ignore this message."
"Uh, it's me again. Just wanted to say hi, I guess. Please pick up the phone, Jess. I really want to hear your voice."
"I'm calling you while I'm driving, that's how much you mean to me. Practically breakin' the law just for you."
"Ok, Jessica. I-I'm sorry. I'm such a jerk and I deserve all the fucking hate from you, just please let me hear your voice."
"Everything that Eleanor said is a lie. You mean the world to me. I know it's a pathetic way to say it over the phone but I just need to tell you - I love you, Jess."
Every voicemail. Every word he spoke, made the tears fall even more. I never knew it was possible to cry over a single person's voice, but I guess it's possible.
It sucks, too. I don't even know what to believe anymore - Louis says one thing but then he does another. It hurts like hell because even though I want to believe him so bad, I can't. I don't want to fall into his trap again - I don't want to get hurt again.
"Jess? Jess, what's wrong?" Skylar questions, immediately coming by my side once she sees the tears.
I sniffle and shake my head. I can't make out any words without letting a horrific sob come out as well. Skylar doesn't push any farther, she just comforts me and gives me my space. So like always, I just tremble under my own tears and curl up into a burrito.
Slowly, my tears begin to stop but the pain in my chest doesn't lessen.
Does he expect me to forgive him over a fucking phone call?
After all of this, he doesn't even apologize in person.
"Jessica, what happened?" Skylar says, snapping me out of my thoughts.
I could see that Skylar deeply wants to know because she's one of those people who always wants to know what's going on. But I really didn't want this to be a bigger problem than it already is, so I just lied.
"Nothing. Just some stupid overactive tears." I try to laugh it off.
But Skylar knows me too well, she knows I'm lying. Inside, I'm begging that she'll understand and let it go.
"Sky, I'm fine, really." I say and plead with my eyes for her to let this drop.
"Okay." She smiles, getting my message.
And just like that, my mom walks in with gingerbread cookies - thanks to the December atmosphere. Skylar and I munch on the cookies - chewing off the heads first and then eating the rest of the cookie afterwards.
Just like that, my mind was focused on silly cookie-shaped men instead of a silly, heartbreaking guy.
--------------------------
"Pumpkin spice latte, please." I ask the coffee girl.
"It'll be up in about two minutes." She says and writes my name on the cup.
I thank her with a nod and wobble away.
Normally, a person with an injured ankle shouldn't be out ordering a coffee all by themselves but I couldn't help myself. I was tired of just sitting at home, so I just took the bus and wandered around a bit. Plus, I was really craving a pumpkin spice latte.
Before I even knew it, my drink was done and I cupped it around my hands, trying to get all the warmth I can on this winter day. I walk to my usual seat in the corner - with a crutch in one hand and my drink in the other - and take a seat near the bookshelves and cute little coffee tables. Enjoying my peaceful little area, I close my eyes and continue to drink my pumpkin spice.
Well, until I was suddenly startled by a certain somebody.
"Jessica?" A too-familiar, thick-Irish voice says.
"Holy crap!" I almost scream - partially from being startled and partially from the fact that Niall is right in front of me.
"Shh," he says and sits next to me.
I don't say anything, mostly because I don't know what to say. I mean, Niall is the one who came to me in the first place.
"What happened to your ankle?"
"Knocked into something and fell." I reply, referring to the Thanksgiving incident.
"Sorry to hear that." He says.
I nod awkwardly and we soon go into an awkward silence.
Uncomfortable doesn't even begin to describe this.
"Well, I'm gonna go now." I interrupt and stand up with my still filled latte.
He places his hand on my shoulder, "No, wait! Not yet."
I sit back down, "Why?"
But soon, my question was answered as I heard the one and only Louis Tomlinson walk up to us.
"Got my cookie, Ni, let's- who are you talking to?" Louis rambles as he walks up to us.
Hesitating, I turn around and make that mistake of making eye contact.
There are millions of girls who would die to at least get a real life glimpse of Louis Tomlinson but unfortunately, I - the only person who might want to truly get away from him - constantly runs into him out of fucking nowhere.
"Jessica." Louis breathes out with a mix of astonishment and relief.
"Hello." Is all I could manage to spit out.
After a 5 seconds of silence, Niall gets up, "I'm gonna get some creamer." Even though he doesn't even have a drink.
Louis takes Niall's seat and sits next to me, but I just stare straight ahead because if I look at his face, I know I'll become a crying fit.
"Did you get my voicemails?" He carefully asks and turns his head to look at me.
"Yea... I did." I half-heartedly say.
"I meant every word."
"Louis..." I warn, being on the bridge of tears.
"No Jessica, I want you to know that I will always care about you. Your more than just a friend to me. I'm deeply, deeply sorry for everything I did, I truly am. I just wish you could see it."
Already, my eyes are overflowing with uncontrollable tears and my nose is clogged with snot. Does he not realize how much he's affecting me right now?
Louis' voice cracks, "Please Jessica, say something. Anything - curse, scream, even slap me - j-just don't leave me like this."
"I could see your pain, Louis." My unstable voice says, "I just can't see the truth."
His voice sounds like it's gonna break, "I-I'm not lying, this is the truth. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, Jess. Please-"
"No, I'm sorry." I say, making us both shocked on what I just said. "I'm sorry for putting you in this pain, I know how it feels. I'm sorry for leaving you like this, I know how that feels. And I'm sorry for not seeing the truth, I just don't want to get hurt again. I'm sorry for putting you and the guys through this. I-I'm sorry."
Finally, I look up to Louis and my heart is crushed into a million pieces. His eyes are as puffy as mine and I could see he's torn apart. I wish so badly to forgive him but at the same time I don't want to - and its the toughest battle I've ever had.
I realize that our hands are together - Louis is clinging onto my hand and I'm clinging onto his. Both of our tears fall onto our own laps and I know we're going through the same pain, which hurts like hell and I'm sorry for that.
Niall walks up to us with his hands stuffed deep in his pockets and sees our defeated faces. His eyes break and I suddenly see the pain in him too, which hits me like a gunshot.
I couldn't take it anymore - the two people I really, really cared about are crumbling right in front of me.
With all my might, I leave my former two best friends crying in the corner of a coffee shop and choke out the only things I know is true here.
"I-I'm sorry, so so sorry."
A/N:
OMFG DHDJSUN THE TEARSSSS WHAT IM CFYING TOO
JESS JUST FORGIVE DAMMIT
Oh hey, sorry for updating so late :///
I've been really busy with school but no matter what, I will always make time for you lovelies
THANK YOU EVERYONEEEEE FOR VOTING AND COMMENTING AND JUST READING IN GENERAL ILYSFM
& happy EASTER to y'all
hope you all find happiness in your easter eggs :)))
- Lauren (secretly a bunny for today^)