Tomorrow's gonna be a disaster, I can tell. Why? Because I'm back at the Countryhumans world and I showed up injured to a certain Russian's house. Covered in snow and blood. Even worse, UN and the other countries are planning to have a meeting and I pretty sure they're gonna ask heck loads of questions.
"What's going on here?" A voice echoed softly.
"What do you mean Dahlia?" I replied.
I smiled without looking up. I looked at Dahlia. She looked concerned and glanced at the window. She sighed. I mean, she probably blacked out again.
"Why are you back here?" She asked.
I shrugged. "I don't know."
"What do you mean?"
"You know very well what I mean."
"No, I don't!"
"Yes, you do."
Dahlia sighed, "Look, I blacked out like... You know, what happened when you first got here."
"Makes sense. I just got sucked by the portal again. Unfortunately."
"Pitiful. Glad you're you, not me."
"I'm you and you are me, idiot."
"No, I mean, you yourself gotta deal with these stuff. I'm like, just watching at the sideline."
"You're right, and it's annoying and frustrating."
"You're just calling yourself annoying and frustrating."
"That's cause I am."
"Touché."
We chuckled as I continued writing in a notebook. Then I heard footsteps. Dahlia immediately disappeared. I wish I can just disappear into oblivion. I'm just kidding. A knock interrupted my thoughts. The wooden door opened and Russia was standing there.
"Привет Россия (hello Russia)!" I greeted. "Do you need anything?"
"Not really," he said. "Um... Do you wanna hang out and do something?"
"Sure! Come here." I signaled him to come over.
He walked towards me and sat down. I rummaged through my bag and took out a pack of UNO cards. That one game that ruins relationships. At least from my experience. I still remember that one time I crushed Amanda (a friend of mine) in the game and she threw a tantrum. Those were fun times.
We played for a few minutes. It was fun. We did about 4 rounds and this is the 5th one. I was down with 3 cards and Russia was on 2. I dropped a +2 card dramatically and watched in amusement as Russia irritably picked the two cards.
Next, Russ dropped a +4 card and he chuckled as I glared at him for making me lose my chance. Then I dropped a red card. I rechecked my cards as Russia dropped a yellow 5 card. A minutes passed and we were down to 2 cards.
I pulled out a +2 card and yelled UNO. After that, I won. Since we made an agreement that whoever loses has to do whatever the winner says, Russia is shaking to his knees right now. But I had something else in my mind...
Now I know what you perverts are thinking, NO. I'm just gonna tell him to do something DEFINITELY NOT related to what your unsanitary minds are thinking right now. Anyway, I stared at Russia and he absolutely refused to make eye contact. I grinned at this behavior.
"Alright Ruski~" I cooed. He looked at me feeling nervous and annoyed at the same time.
"O-Ok, what d-do you want me to do?" he stuttered a bit. He's obviously trying to hide the fact that he's tense.
"Well," I smiled. "I thought maybe we can have... A DRINKING CONTEST!!!"
"Wait really-"
"YES, NOW SHUT YOUR MOUTH AND GO GET THE VODKA AND ALCOHOL!!!"
"All right, all right," Russia smirked. Then he slowly got up. "Let's see if you can keep up~"
"Oh you're on!!" I sneered. "You'll barf sooner than me. But I won't even barf at all."
"Oh we'll see about that~" He cooed. We darted downstairs and sat on the countertop. We chugged on a few and it went on for 30 minutes. I could see Russia's face flushed. He was starting to talk a bit slurry too. But I noticed I also started to slur.
"S-So, are you su-sure you can still keep up? Hic!" Russia stuttered.
"O-Of course!!" I responded. "M-Maybe you should l-lay back a little, hic!"
"Н-Нет," he hiccuped. "I can't let some doll w-win against me in a d-drinking contest."
"Bold of y-you to assume I-I'm pretty," I shot back.
"I mean," he said. "You are pretty."
I stopped chugging at that sentence. He thinks I'm pretty? I laughed at that statement. Surely I look like a woman who has 10 kids, gets 1 hour of sleep, has a messy hair that's basically a bird nest, dark circles around my eyes that make me look like a panda, and definitely DOES NOT take care of myself. Well, I meant by junk food, sleep, etcetera, not the self-harm thingies, no.
"Sorry comrade, but I'm far f-from being p-pretty," I chuckled. "Not even m-makeup and fix this mess that p-people call a face."
"Это не то, как я это вижу (that's not how I see it)," he chugged a couple more bottles. "Y-Your very pretty. You'll a-always be."
"N-Not always," I looked down. "Even b-beauty doesn't lasts. Everything w-will fade away at s-some point."
"Maybe, but..." He sighed. "Y-You'll still be beautiful to me."
"You do know what you're saying, right?" I managed to say without slurring. "You're drunk."
"Y-Yes, but I'm not that drunk," he sneered. "H-How about you? Do you kn-know what you're s-saying?"
"Of course. Hic!" I hiccuped and we both burst into laughter.
That's nice I guess. We drank the last bottle and collapsed on the countertop. Then we laughed once again. We were half drunk and tired (side effects of the damned and seriously awesome vodka! Yay, I guess). We both decided to call it a day (because we drank so much) and laid on the sofa. We ended up sleeping in the couch.
~~~
THUD!
"Ouch!" I yelped. I fell from the sofa and hit my head on the floor, yay. I stood up and Russia was sleeping soundly on the couch. He was hugging a pillow, and I seriously thought it was cute.
I marched to the kitchen and took out some biscuits. Then I heard someone's phone ring. I checked my phone, but that wasn't it. The ringing was coming from the living room and as I expected, it was Russia's phone.
I snooped around like I always do and answered the call. But unfortunately, I made a terrible mistake. I didn't read who was calling.
"Hello?" I said in a slightly hoarse voice. Maybe because I drank too much last night or because of regular daily phlegm?
"Hello Russia!" A distinctly familiar voice echoed through my ear. I coughed a bit.
"Ah, UN!!" I answered. I know Russian, so I hope I at least make this seem as if I am Russia.
"I'm just reminding you about our meeting later at 8:30," UN cheered. He was so cheerful, at least his voice is. But I'm far from that.
"О да, спасибо, что напомнил мне (Oh yeah, thanks for reminding me)," I replied in Russian.
"Uh... R-Russia, you do know I can't speak Russian, right?" UN nervously informed. I slapped my face with my palm and dragged it downwards like gravity does to a ball in midair.
"Um... I said thanks for reminding me," I explained. UN chuckled and said goodbye before he hung up.
Great, now I gotta be prepared for questions. I need to freshen up my mind and fill it with possible alibis and excuses for those inquiries they're about to flood upon me. And I'm gonna have to risk drowning in shame.
I slowly crept up to Russia and shook him gently. He groaned and turned. I shook him again, but vigorously. He got up and stared at me.
"What is it?" he scratched his head.
"UN called," I explained. "It's about the meeting on 8:30."
"Oh right," Russia stood up and checked the time. "It's still 7:09."
"If that's so, why don't we eat something first?" I suggested. He seemed to like that idea. He chuckled and went to the kitchen. I followed him.
We ate some old fashion Blini and some Pirozhki. They were good and afterwards, we went on our way to the meeting place.